video your empty toilet from the furthest point in the bathroom for 5 minutes
when you have people around and a guest has gone to the bathroom
put the video on the tv and all start laughing as they return
i had a lady guest convinced we had a hidden video camera in the loo

no need, I just show them my under cover surveillance camera I have set up in the toilets

While I was working on offshore oil rigs out of West Africa many years ago. I encountered a toolpusher from hell, a veritable pig of of a man with no redeaming qualities that I was ever aware of.

When it eventually came his turn to be 'rotated', a member of the crew cut out the profile of a 45 pistol in aluminium foil and slipped it into the lining of his holdall.

The first stop on the way home from West Africa was Paris CDG, and when he tried to pass his bag through security, he was held there for almost twenty hours.

If he happens to be out there in ciberspace and seeking revenge..............I was your Derrickman at the time.............bring it on

About 9 years ago I started getting text messages from an unknown number, supposedly from a woman, who knew every detail of my life. She would tell me what clothes I was wearing, what I'd done that day etc. Which was pretty freaky, because I didn't have a girlfriend or a wife at the time, so no-one could possibly know this stuff.

So this went on for about six months, and I was convinced I had a stalker. God knows why anyone would want to stalk me, but anyway.

Then one day my sister in law rang me from her mobile phone, and I noticed her number was the same as my 'stalker'. So then what the hell do you do, my brothers wifes been texting me for 6 months about what I'm wearing and what I'm doing.

So next time I was out with my brother, I gently mentioned it, and he absolutely pissed himself laughing. He'd been taking his wifes phone and texting me stuff about myself just to freak me out for the last 6 months.

Did I mention my brother is an absolute bastard?

JTL

Let's get him...let's devise a plan so cunning....

Boobies and vaginas.

At last you're joining in at our level!

Yes he does seem to have upped his game