Advice needed please.
Mar 31st 2007, 1:18 pm
#1
BE Forum Addict
Thread Starter
Joined: Feb 2007
Posts: 1,187
Advice needed please.
As some of you know, our daughter has said she will come with us to oz this time, boyfriend will be in tow with a working visa.
Now, I really want them to fall in love with the place so they stay for good
Do you think it would be best for them to come out with us or follow us in a couple of months. What I'm thinking is that with all the up heaval of trying to find somewhere to live etc. it might have a negative effect.
If they come out later we will be more settled (hopefully). The worry is that once we are out of the country, the old saying springs to mind, "out of site out of mind". They might get settled, (they will probably have to stay with boyfriend parents when we leave) and change their minds.
Advice will be very much appreciated as I want to get this right!
Mandy
Now, I really want them to fall in love with the place so they stay for good
Do you think it would be best for them to come out with us or follow us in a couple of months. What I'm thinking is that with all the up heaval of trying to find somewhere to live etc. it might have a negative effect.
If they come out later we will be more settled (hopefully). The worry is that once we are out of the country, the old saying springs to mind, "out of site out of mind". They might get settled, (they will probably have to stay with boyfriend parents when we leave) and change their minds.
Advice will be very much appreciated as I want to get this right!
Mandy
Mar 31st 2007, 1:58 pm
#2
forever hopeful
Joined: Mar 2005
Location: oh,i don't flippin know, why ask me
Posts: 1,879
Re: Advice needed please.
I would be inclined to take them with me when we left.
Young people settle into new routines very quickly and don't really like to give up any of the routine or familiar.
If they are living with his parents, they might spend the next couple of months making life very easy for them whilst trying to persuade them not to go (after all they would be losing thier son) so it might end up too cooshy a number to give up on.
Also, if they join you at a later date, when they do come over it might make them feel like they are stepping INTO your world instead of helping to create the life that you will eventually have.
If they do come with you, you will have to be the ones making some sacrifices to give them and easier ride of it so that the move isn't so emotional and scares them off.
Good luck with whatever you decide. hope it all works out ok in the end.
Louise
Young people settle into new routines very quickly and don't really like to give up any of the routine or familiar.
If they are living with his parents, they might spend the next couple of months making life very easy for them whilst trying to persuade them not to go (after all they would be losing thier son) so it might end up too cooshy a number to give up on.
Also, if they join you at a later date, when they do come over it might make them feel like they are stepping INTO your world instead of helping to create the life that you will eventually have.
If they do come with you, you will have to be the ones making some sacrifices to give them and easier ride of it so that the move isn't so emotional and scares them off.
Good luck with whatever you decide. hope it all works out ok in the end.
Louise
Mar 31st 2007, 3:00 pm
#3
Joined: May 2006
Location: in the Sydney asylum
Posts: 20,690
Re: Advice needed please.
I would be inclined to take them with me when we left.
Young people settle into new routines very quickly and don't really like to give up any of the routine or familiar.
If they are living with his parents, they might spend the next couple of months making life very easy for them whilst trying to persuade them not to go (after all they would be losing thier son) so it might end up too cooshy a number to give up on.
Also, if they join you at a later date, when they do come over it might make them feel like they are stepping INTO your world instead of helping to create the life that you will eventually have.
If they do come with you, you will have to be the ones making some sacrifices to give them and easier ride of it so that the move isn't so emotional and scares them off.
Good luck with whatever you decide. hope it all works out ok in the end.
Louise
Young people settle into new routines very quickly and don't really like to give up any of the routine or familiar.
If they are living with his parents, they might spend the next couple of months making life very easy for them whilst trying to persuade them not to go (after all they would be losing thier son) so it might end up too cooshy a number to give up on.
Also, if they join you at a later date, when they do come over it might make them feel like they are stepping INTO your world instead of helping to create the life that you will eventually have.
If they do come with you, you will have to be the ones making some sacrifices to give them and easier ride of it so that the move isn't so emotional and scares them off.
Good luck with whatever you decide. hope it all works out ok in the end.
Louise
take them with you, don't give them time to back out a bit of hassle at first is expected and also lets them see all the things on offer when you looking around.
Good luck hope it works out
Kim
Mar 31st 2007, 3:19 pm
#4
BE Enthusiast
Joined: Oct 2006
Location: In the hilly bit around Perth WA :)
Posts: 814
Re: Advice needed please.
Reckon i'd take them - plonk them on the beach or somewhere else nice while you do all the donkey in the daytime.
Mar 31st 2007, 7:25 pm
#5
Lost in BE Cyberspace
Joined: Feb 2007
Posts: 11,322
Re: Advice needed please.
I should take them with you so they can help you make your news lives
togther.And feel a part of it. instead of comming over late with all plans
made without them.
togther.And feel a part of it. instead of comming over late with all plans
made without them.
