Hi all

Just want some opinions really.

Went to oz in sept 2009, came back to uk, but now i want to try oz again but the other half doesn,t!!!

Things didnt work out first time round, we collapsed at first hurdle - yes i know, was a stupid thing to do, should off stuck it out, but anyway i want to try again but other half not interested.

We have this chance that alot of people would dream off and cant do.

Any advice and thoughts would be great.

We are a family of 5, 3 girls aged 14, 12 and 3.

If hes not interested what can you do.Once burnt and all that.

What are his reasons for not wanting to go there again?

Are they justified?

Is he adamant? ( not the eighties singer... I mean resolute)

How much have you talked about it?

Have you told him what YOU want


HOW much do YOU want to do this?

I have tried to talk to him, but he doesnt want to know!!! Coz we had a bad experience last time, thats it for him, end of!!
But i have learnt from past mistakes and would do it all so different this time but he just doesnt want to know.

Perhaps go to a counselling session together, with someone who is independent, ie not a family member, to try and identify the issues without causing trauma for either of you.

Is that the level of the communication between you? And the level of his consideration for you?

Sorry, but if I had something important to discuss with HIM, HE at least listens to me and talks to me... Ok, we have agreed that HE has the final say, but my husband would NEVER dismiss me....

Sorry... If he isnt prepared to talk... There is nothing you can do.... Other than live a life of what ifs and wishing you had....

Its interesting that you are using the word Dream. Probably in that practical male mind there is no way he now sees it as HIS dream - having been there done that the beer goggles are off and he just sees it for the struggle it was.

Men are a bit more black and white than us girls I know I live with 4 of them

If you want to go back you have to give some concrete reasons why its different and why it will work this time.

How are the teens taking it. IME they get pretty vocal around that age too

Havent really spoke to kids about it properly as i think i aleast need to talk to my hubby first.

Yeah no point upsetting everyone.

Whats wrong with your life there and what will be better here?

No magic wand has been waved over Australia the past 2 years - quite the opposite. Would it be that different this time

Its a stressful and emotional experience even if it goes well, its a big boat to rock if it was that much of a disaster last time.

Agree... Be much harder right now with the exchange rate, increased prices of everything etc etc etc

Perhaps draw up a table for each of you to fill out - on a separate sheet of paper for each of you. Have 4 columns or boxes:

• Pros of staying in the UK
• Cons of staying in the UK
• Pros of moving to Australia
• Cons of moving to Australia

An exercise like this can sometimes help you to come to a balanced and reasoned decision, having identified the different factors for each party.

Its so hard knowing what to do for the best!
My OH a builder at mo but he training in a career for welding. Does anyone know what the welding jobs are like in OZ?? Brisbane/GC way?
Maybe if i can get some good news on job front for him, that might be somewhere to start.

Dont know about welding but OH is a builder, he finishes a huge project in september and we have a choice of a new project in melb or brisbane - still to decide. However a lot of guys on the site will not have work to go to.

IMO there are less jobs than 2 years ago. The unemployment rate in OZ is very low but be wary of that for eg my son is counted as employed - the reality is he works 3 - 8 hours a week!

Sorry I cant be more helpful.

I'm in opposite position - DH wants to go and I don't as I love the UK and we have a fantastic life here and financially we're finding it very very easy in the UK - if we want it we buy it and I am very aware that moving to Oz that is going to be VERY different.

BUT..... I'm going to give it a go as we have to give it a try and I've spent my life moving countries so shouldn't find it that hard to settle as I wont be missing family or anything like that. DH has given my dream of living in the uk a go for 13yrs so I should do the same for him. If you've already been and it didn't work out I totally understand why DH doesnt want to go thru the whole process again as its HARD WORK!! Good luck

Has anyone been in same situation???

Did you give it another go or stay put???

Just like to hear other peoples stories.

Thanks