Update on ex's permission - NOT!!
Dec 24th 2007, 7:38 am
#106
Make it happen!!!!
Joined: Mar 2007
Location: Little Mountain, Sunshine Coast, Queensland
Posts: 3,008
Re: Update on ex's permission - NOT!!
CONGRATULATIONS Sarah.......it's all over now babe!!!!! 
Hope you have a fab christmas without the worry of any more court cases
My ex didn't bother to turn up on the final hearing either.........but I still had to take the stand etc...........
Anyway.........well done again........really, really pleased for you
Beth x x
Hope you have a fab christmas without the worry of any more court casesMy ex didn't bother to turn up on the final hearing either.........but I still had to take the stand etc...........
Anyway.........well done again........really, really pleased for you
Beth x x
Dec 24th 2007, 9:49 am
#107
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Re: Update on ex's permission - NOT!!
Congratualtions I'm so glad it all worked out in the end.
Although I'm amazed the court agreed to the outrageous demands when he hasn't seen her for 5 years!!!:curse:
If he hasn't seen up til now all he's after is money or a cheap holiday.
It still amazes me what nasty, money grabbing losers there are in this world.
Have a wonderful Christmas and all the best for a wonderful New Year and the start of your brand new life x
Although I'm amazed the court agreed to the outrageous demands when he hasn't seen her for 5 years!!!:curse:
If he hasn't seen up til now all he's after is money or a cheap holiday.
It still amazes me what nasty, money grabbing losers there are in this world.
Have a wonderful Christmas and all the best for a wonderful New Year and the start of your brand new life x
Dec 24th 2007, 9:52 am
#108
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Thread Starter
Joined: Jan 2007
Location: Hobart, Tasmania
Posts: 359
Re: Update on ex's permission - NOT!!
Hi everyone
Many thanks for the congrats. Have no fear I will make no easy ride of this for him after what he has done to my girls. I believe in what goes around comes around and at the end of the day HE LOST..
Merry Christmas to all
Sarah
Many thanks for the congrats. Have no fear I will make no easy ride of this for him after what he has done to my girls. I believe in what goes around comes around and at the end of the day HE LOST..
Merry Christmas to all
Sarah
Dec 24th 2007, 10:27 am
#109
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Joined: Jul 2007
Location: hampshire UK
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Re: Update on ex's permission - NOT!!
Congratulations on your win! Send him air tickets for Afghan Airways or some other appropriate airline....thats the least he deserves......He sounds a right A. Hole.
Anyway you can now enjoy your Xmas to its fullest!!! Have a wonderful time in Oz.
All the best.
Debby & Nigel.
Anyway you can now enjoy your Xmas to its fullest!!! Have a wonderful time in Oz.
All the best.
Debby & Nigel.
Dec 26th 2007, 2:26 pm
#110
Forum Regular
Joined: Dec 2007
Location: Livingston Village. West Lothian
Posts: 59
Re: Update on ex's permission - NOT!!
Hi everyone,
Thought I would release my frustrations by giving an update on our trials and tribulations in relation to getting permission from my ex for our daughter age 10 years to emigrate.
Back in Feb we went on holiday to Oz, OH has family there, fell in love with the lifestyle etc and on return applied for a job (nurse) got job offer in 3 weeks, got state registration in 2 weeks all good so far. Had solicitor appointment in early March thanks to forum to go through preliminaries to get permission from ex who has not had contact for 5 years. Letters sent, no reply, stat dec sent, no reply, court application made simultaneously with 457 app as all was looking good that he had disappeared. Then on court day last Monday 13th he APPEARS and guess what he does cross application to get residency after all this time. Our meds had been in LCU since early July and the backlogs gave us a good excuse for being slow proceeding with job offer/start date. However today Meds all finalized and solicitor says next court appearance will be 5th Nov after final CAFCASS report and final hearing will probably be early in New Year. Have been quoted £4000 Plus..
Well what now...do you think a job offer will be kept open that long? Has anyone been left in this position?
I know so many people are having similar issues on BE but even so you still feel alone and frustrated and angry and AGHHHHH...
Sarah
Thought I would release my frustrations by giving an update on our trials and tribulations in relation to getting permission from my ex for our daughter age 10 years to emigrate.
Back in Feb we went on holiday to Oz, OH has family there, fell in love with the lifestyle etc and on return applied for a job (nurse) got job offer in 3 weeks, got state registration in 2 weeks all good so far. Had solicitor appointment in early March thanks to forum to go through preliminaries to get permission from ex who has not had contact for 5 years. Letters sent, no reply, stat dec sent, no reply, court application made simultaneously with 457 app as all was looking good that he had disappeared. Then on court day last Monday 13th he APPEARS and guess what he does cross application to get residency after all this time. Our meds had been in LCU since early July and the backlogs gave us a good excuse for being slow proceeding with job offer/start date. However today Meds all finalized and solicitor says next court appearance will be 5th Nov after final CAFCASS report and final hearing will probably be early in New Year. Have been quoted £4000 Plus..
Well what now...do you think a job offer will be kept open that long? Has anyone been left in this position?
I know so many people are having similar issues on BE but even so you still feel alone and frustrated and angry and AGHHHHH...
Sarah
Just joined to offer you any help you might need about Alice Springs.
I used to work out of there for an Aboriginal Medical Service in the Aged Care Field.
If I can help in any way??
Dennis
Dec 27th 2007, 7:13 am
#111
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Re: Update on ex's permission - NOT!!
hi sarah. CONGRATULATIONS!!!! and good luck in your new life
vicky
vicky
Dec 27th 2007, 10:16 am
#112
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Re: Update on ex's permission - NOT!!
Hi Dennis
Great to hear from someone else who has been to Alice. We loved it there when we visited. when we are back on email properly I will be intouch
Happy New Year
Sarah
Great to hear from someone else who has been to Alice. We loved it there when we visited. when we are back on email properly I will be intouch
Happy New Year
Sarah
Dec 28th 2007, 1:18 pm
#113
Permanent Resident
Joined: Aug 2007
Location: Geelong
Posts: 480
Re: Update on ex's permission - NOT!!
Good news, hope you enjoy your life downunder. As far as ex is concerned, if he hasn't seen your daughter for 5 years then one trip to Oz in the hottest part of the year with only his flights paid for will come as a nasty shock especially if money is tight for him. Accommodation, transport, food and entertainment all comes at a price and I for one wouldn't provide that.
Lots and lots of luck
Lisa
Lots and lots of luck
Lisa
Dec 28th 2007, 4:50 pm
#114
destination Cairns
Joined: Oct 2005
Posts: 1,839
Re: Update on ex's permission - NOT!!
Hi Sarah,
I just wanted to congratulate you with the decision
and wish you a great life down under.
Oh and if he didn't bother to see her in the UK, I can't
imagine he will be more of a father when she's in Australia.
But then again, maybe his eyes have opened
and he finally realizes what he is missing
Anyway, all the best and make the most of it!!
Miranda
I just wanted to congratulate you with the decision
and wish you a great life down under.
Oh and if he didn't bother to see her in the UK, I can't
imagine he will be more of a father when she's in Australia.
But then again, maybe his eyes have opened
and he finally realizes what he is missing
Anyway, all the best and make the most of it!!
Miranda
Dec 28th 2007, 4:57 pm
#115
Just Joined
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Posts: 11
Re: Update on ex's permission - NOT!!
sharon, Dan and Matthew
Dec 30th 2007, 8:34 pm
#116
If all else fails...smile
Joined: Nov 2006
Location: Northern Territory
Posts: 1,365
Re: Update on ex's permission - NOT!!
Hi Sarah....
First of all I want to offer my congratulations....have only just caught this thread....prob cos spend all my time in the barbie.....it sounds as though you have been living the nightmare....I have that barrel to cross yet....! Something I am dreading....have done the contact thing with court and totally understand when you say no one seems to listen to you...my kids said that to me too!
Was anything mentioned in court about your eldest child?? Just wondering.
Well congratulations again and here's to a successful new start of a new year in a new country.....
Ems x
First of all I want to offer my congratulations....have only just caught this thread....prob cos spend all my time in the barbie.....it sounds as though you have been living the nightmare....I have that barrel to cross yet....! Something I am dreading....have done the contact thing with court and totally understand when you say no one seems to listen to you...my kids said that to me too!
Was anything mentioned in court about your eldest child?? Just wondering.
Well congratulations again and here's to a successful new start of a new year in a new country.....
Ems x
Jan 4th 2008, 11:24 am
#117
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Re: Update on ex's permission - NOT!!
Hi Ems
yes it was and at the minute it still is a nightmare, strangely its not over yet.
my x was told to encourage my eldest daughter who lives with him to see me at the first contact. on arrival he said she didnt want to see me and when we had to observe the contact with him, my eldest and my youngest it was really hard to watch your own child and not talk to her or hold her it broke my heart again. The next contact is sunday 4.5 hours i am dreading it he has already started the mind games with my youngest and after only one hour she suddenly said she missed him, this is not good.
we have to buy a ticket for my eldest child once a year but not to visit me but for her to see her sister which I would never want to stop but it is so hard.I only hope that over time as they rekindle there relationship she can find a space in her heart for me I feel and have felt as if a piece of me has been missing for 13 years and I dont think that will ever change.
Keep in touch we will be back on email next week and fingers crossed get our visa on monday so let me know how you go in the process and if you need anything just ask.
take care
Sarah
yes it was and at the minute it still is a nightmare, strangely its not over yet.
my x was told to encourage my eldest daughter who lives with him to see me at the first contact. on arrival he said she didnt want to see me and when we had to observe the contact with him, my eldest and my youngest it was really hard to watch your own child and not talk to her or hold her it broke my heart again. The next contact is sunday 4.5 hours i am dreading it he has already started the mind games with my youngest and after only one hour she suddenly said she missed him, this is not good.
we have to buy a ticket for my eldest child once a year but not to visit me but for her to see her sister which I would never want to stop but it is so hard.I only hope that over time as they rekindle there relationship she can find a space in her heart for me I feel and have felt as if a piece of me has been missing for 13 years and I dont think that will ever change.
Keep in touch we will be back on email next week and fingers crossed get our visa on monday so let me know how you go in the process and if you need anything just ask.
take care
Sarah
Jan 4th 2008, 12:47 pm
#118
Aussie Finn Mixture!
Joined: May 2005
Location: Leschenault WA (after few locations around WA and Around Europe!)
Posts: 1,151
Re: Update on ex's permission - NOT!!
Hi Ems
yes it was and at the minute it still is a nightmare, strangely its not over yet.
my x was told to encourage my eldest daughter who lives with him to see me at the first contact. on arrival he said she didnt want to see me and when we had to observe the contact with him, my eldest and my youngest it was really hard to watch your own child and not talk to her or hold her it broke my heart again. The next contact is sunday 4.5 hours i am dreading it he has already started the mind games with my youngest and after only one hour she suddenly said she missed him, this is not good.
we have to buy a ticket for my eldest child once a year but not to visit me but for her to see her sister which I would never want to stop but it is so hard.I only hope that over time as they rekindle there relationship she can find a space in her heart for me I feel and have felt as if a piece of me has been missing for 13 years and I dont think that will ever change.
Keep in touch we will be back on email next week and fingers crossed get our visa on monday so let me know how you go in the process and if you need anything just ask.
take care
Sarah
yes it was and at the minute it still is a nightmare, strangely its not over yet.
my x was told to encourage my eldest daughter who lives with him to see me at the first contact. on arrival he said she didnt want to see me and when we had to observe the contact with him, my eldest and my youngest it was really hard to watch your own child and not talk to her or hold her it broke my heart again. The next contact is sunday 4.5 hours i am dreading it he has already started the mind games with my youngest and after only one hour she suddenly said she missed him, this is not good.
we have to buy a ticket for my eldest child once a year but not to visit me but for her to see her sister which I would never want to stop but it is so hard.I only hope that over time as they rekindle there relationship she can find a space in her heart for me I feel and have felt as if a piece of me has been missing for 13 years and I dont think that will ever change.
Keep in touch we will be back on email next week and fingers crossed get our visa on monday so let me know how you go in the process and if you need anything just ask.
take care
Sarah
I honestly don't know if this will help but when I was 10 my parents divorced and a lot of mind games were played, mainly from my mums part, and by the time I was 13 I would not talk to my dad. Not because I didn't want to , but I was simply confused as to what to think and part of me wanted to believe my mum. My dad had the brains to think that a teenager (by then I was 13)would only listen to music so he send me a tape of ALL the modern hit songs that had the lyrics HE WANTED TO SAY. He had spent time to put it all together, sure enough as it was music, more so WELL KNOWN FAMOUS BANDS that teenagers listen to (ie my dad had gone through the effort to listen to my "then" music and their lyrics) it really made me listen to it. It still took me couple of months to contact him but trust me, I'm now 32 and I still remember the fact that not only did he listen to my music, he also connected through my music, I've never forgotten that! At that age, your idols, may it be through music, movies or something else, means so much more than it probably should and personal point of view, it was amazing that not only did my folks listen to my music but they LISTENED to my music, if that makes sense, as in they listened to what my idols said.
This may help you, it may not, but try and listen to her music, I don't know a single teenager who doesn't listen to the lyrics, and find the right lyrics to tell her what you want to say. May seen far fetched but honestly, as funny as it may seem to some 15+yrs ago, it meant the world to me then that someone could "connect" with me that way. My mum has since passed away but I can honestly say, my dads effort brought us closer together and 15+yrs we are best of friends. I know, seems silly but even now I can think like a 13 yr old would....
Jan 4th 2008, 2:30 pm
#119
If all else fails...smile
Joined: Nov 2006
Location: Northern Territory
Posts: 1,365
Re: Update on ex's permission - NOT!!
Hi Ems
yes it was and at the minute it still is a nightmare, strangely its not over yet.
my x was told to encourage my eldest daughter who lives with him to see me at the first contact. on arrival he said she didnt want to see me and when we had to observe the contact with him, my eldest and my youngest it was really hard to watch your own child and not talk to her or hold her it broke my heart again. The next contact is sunday 4.5 hours i am dreading it he has already started the mind games with my youngest and after only one hour she suddenly said she missed him, this is not good.
we have to buy a ticket for my eldest child once a year but not to visit me but for her to see her sister which I would never want to stop but it is so hard.I only hope that over time as they rekindle there relationship she can find a space in her heart for me I feel and have felt as if a piece of me has been missing for 13 years and I dont think that will ever change.
Keep in touch we will be back on email next week and fingers crossed get our visa on monday so let me know how you go in the process and if you need anything just ask.
take care
Sarah
yes it was and at the minute it still is a nightmare, strangely its not over yet.
my x was told to encourage my eldest daughter who lives with him to see me at the first contact. on arrival he said she didnt want to see me and when we had to observe the contact with him, my eldest and my youngest it was really hard to watch your own child and not talk to her or hold her it broke my heart again. The next contact is sunday 4.5 hours i am dreading it he has already started the mind games with my youngest and after only one hour she suddenly said she missed him, this is not good.
we have to buy a ticket for my eldest child once a year but not to visit me but for her to see her sister which I would never want to stop but it is so hard.I only hope that over time as they rekindle there relationship she can find a space in her heart for me I feel and have felt as if a piece of me has been missing for 13 years and I dont think that will ever change.
Keep in touch we will be back on email next week and fingers crossed get our visa on monday so let me know how you go in the process and if you need anything just ask.
take care
Sarah
Hi Sarah.....what a nightmare...be thinking of you Sunday....the mind games are the worst, I know I wanted to pull my boys to one side and hold them etc, but having been told that I was the one stopping contact, I had to show the court it was not me.....my ex has not seen my boys for nearly 2 years now and it was only due to my eldest breaking down in front of the contact worker that they realised that this was the boys talking and not me....youngest refused to go and was in the process of starting therapy.....really feel for you hun! As I say will be thinking of you....be strong and find comfort in your new strength in your life.....
Regarding your eldest, time will work and hey who knows, if she is coming out to Oz to visit her sister then maybe....think it stinks that they split the family anyway!
Take care Em x
Jan 4th 2008, 2:38 pm
#120
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Location: In the hilly bit around Perth WA :)
Posts: 814
Re: Update on ex's permission - NOT!!
Oh i've only just seen the update - what a relief for you all.
Congrats to you - well done
Congrats to you - well done
