Hi Guys

I have been on with the emigrating process for over 2 years have finally been recently on a rekki and validated my visa over a month ago and before I went I was so excited about my plans to go.

But since I have been home I just feel rather deflated and can't get my head around things, it may have something to do with my daughter of 15 who still insists she doesn't want to go and my father not being very well and living in a nursing home and feel should I be living him.

Sorry to sound like a whinging pom but I feel like I am now talking myself out of wanting to go which my best friend who knows me very well said I would end up doing when I first started the process.

Sorry to sound so negative!!!!

Kind regards

Debbie

cant really be positive for you..

if your hearts not in it, dont do it.. as going back to uk, with all your stuff, is gonna be soo expensive.

You have to be 100% positive in my mind to do it,

You need to be 100% pig headed

You need to be 100% selfish

If your not, your possibly fooling yourself, and it will never work.. you seem to be crying out for reassurance, but still I think you should perhaps sit on your visa for a while, and see how things pan out...

Debbie,

It's quite normal to have doubts - especially with your daughter not wanting to come and your Dad not being 100%. Don't beat yourself up about it, take some time out from it all and see how you feel then.

You've validated your visa, so you have plenty of time to decide if you are doing the right thing.

Hi Debbie,

I agree with both posts on here.

I think you have to have your whole heart in something like this.

I think with your current circumstances, it would be best to take 12mths out and gather your thoughts. Applying for a visa is a long and expensive process and after all the hard work you have probably put into it, I don't think you should throw it away.

Why does your daughter not want to go, do you think it is because of friends ?

Also, this may sound really bad, but yes, you have to be selfish in a situation like this, this is your life and you have to live it how you see best, I think your daughter may come round to the idea eventually.

Have you spoke to your dad and asked his thoughts ? Even though it is your decision alone, maybe talking to your dad may make the decision a little easier for you ?

I can't imagine whats flying around your head at the moment, but I'm sure that whatever you decide will be right for you. Having said that, don't let your once in a lifetime opportunity slip through your fingers.

Good Luck

totally agree with the other posters. you really need to know if the move is right for you and the only person who can give you that answer is yourself. but as you've got your visa validated you've got a good 5 years to decide whether or not you want to go.
I know you're probably hoping for people to tell you to do it but whats right for them maybe wrong for you

Thats not whingin, its your more realistic reaction to a country you have now seen, maybe your image before was a bit more glam. Give yourself some time to think now you know more about it, weigh up the pros and cons and see if its really worth upsetting the family applecart for.

You described me 100% there :-)
Maybe that's why I'm settling?

tis true tho m8, and i dont mean in an agressive angry way, but you need to be strong !

It's the pig headed and selfish that described me :-)
I say, bugger the rest, I'll do exactly what I want to do

You don't want it enough.
Best stay over there and save yourself a lot of heartache.

Thanks for your replies on this matter I know it may sound like I am wanting reassurance and perhaps I don't want this enough but I guess because if I didn't have the concerns of the family I would be on the next plane tomorrow!!

Yes, your right you have to be 100% selfish and pig headed in this matter and perhaps I need to be a little bit more so.

I am going to give myself some time now I have validated. I honestly don't want to give up this opportunity of a lifetime of going because I know I will regret years down the line, and as awful as it sounds my daughter will be off doing her own thing in a few years and my father wouldn't want me to stop here because of him.

Kind regards

Debbie

Hi Debbie,
I know exactly how you feel. We also validated our visa in september and absolutely love Australia. The problem is my 21 year old son said it wasn't the right time for him to move out there.
He went into the British army 4 weeks ago and I miss him so much. I keep thinking if I feel like this now when he is only in Surrey, how will I feel when we are on the other side of the world. My husband is all geared up to go but we haven't sold or house yet so that has given me extra time here. Everyone tells me I've got empty nest syndrome but it doesn't stop the sadness.

Anne xx

People on here take it too seriously - its not like you're going to donate a kidney!

Give it a try.....if you don't like it.....go back......or try something else

Good advice. No point in rushing it if things aren't right for you. The whole moving to Aus thing is a very big step and you need to be 100% sure it's what you want and you're willing to make the sacrifices needed

Good luck with it all

Easy to say if you're not in the OP's situation. Oh and coming back can be very hard, not like moving to another town can be very costly. Obviously you must be loaded and can afford to skip from country to country. Other people have to make the right move for themselves at the right time weighing up all the pros and cons before deciding if it's really worth it....Plenty of people end up coming back and a lot end up stuck in Aus wanting to return to the UK and yes some go and love it, or find it's not better just different