How it feels to try and build a new life!
Jan 12th 2003, 9:25 am
#46
BE Enthusiast
Joined: Oct 2002
Location: UK 2 Oz, Oz 2 UK, Been there, done that, got the tee-shirt!
Posts: 773
Special Needs
I work in a secondary school within special needs here in the U.K.. Inclusion is encouraged and has good and bad points. Children who are the most needy obviously get the most help. We go into classrooms and we take them out of lessons to give them extra support for such things a reading, writing, behaviour management work or even if they are having a hard time at home and need a little TLC. If we know one of our students in sitting an exam, we will go with them for support (we do not help with the test). If the child is having a bad day (emotionally or otherwise) we will bring them out of lesson for 10 mins, have a chat etc and then re-introduce them if possible. Sometimes these kids come from terrible background and just need a friend. Others, are very challenging but you can usually talk them round.
Sometimes is difficult if you are trying to teach a pupil with educational difficulties and you have a pupil with behaviour difficulties in the class, and yes sometimes lessons are disrupted. However, these children are delt with proptly by senior members of staff. The point is you are not going to please everyone all of the time. I love my job, and I hope that I can find a similar one in OZ. I think children are much the same the world over, its how they are handled that is different!!
Sometimes is difficult if you are trying to teach a pupil with educational difficulties and you have a pupil with behaviour difficulties in the class, and yes sometimes lessons are disrupted. However, these children are delt with proptly by senior members of staff. The point is you are not going to please everyone all of the time. I love my job, and I hope that I can find a similar one in OZ. I think children are much the same the world over, its how they are handled that is different!!
Sep 20th 2003, 11:47 am
#47
Forum Regular
Joined: Sep 2003
Posts: 54
Re: How it feels to try and build a new life!
Originally posted by Watt Dabney
I've been inspired to write this post by the sense of negativity on this site lately and knowing what frightening reading it can make from the UK.
So here's my experience/advice for what its worth having been in NZ for 2 months.
The upheaval is hard the goodbyes are even worse and just when you think the worst hurdles have been jumped when you get on the plane - actually you've only just started!(only this time youv'e got no-one to look after the kids whilst you sort things out!).
The first few months are the hardest, my advice grit you're teeth get your head down and get on with it, you will come out the other end knackered but pleased with you're progress.
The sheer effort involved in day to day life in what is essentially an alien enviroment is exauhsting (esp for those of us who have not visited/have no friends or rellies in the place we are going to). You promise youreself that you are making this move for the good of your kids yet you will spend the 1st few months dragging them round estate agents, car dealers, furniture shops, electrical shops and supermarkets, and it takes twice as long when you don't know the area/product names etc. You have no idea whos a good dealer, who will rip you off, what/where to avoid and you have no-one to ask you are literally flying by the seat of your pants. This is where I thinlk the homesickness sets in. After and during all this you really need a someone you know and trust to put their arm round you give you a big hug and tell you everything will be ok (and offer to look after the kids!) You miss the experienced advice of your parents/peers, never mind needing to know if you have done the right thing moving you don't even know if you have bought a decent make washing machine!
Also you have no history here, you can't point to pub/restaurant and say remember when we...! Or point to a hospital and say to the kids you were born there or a house and say to them I/dad/nannie grew up there.
You recognise no faces in your local supermarket/high street.
This is a positive post honest, you can overcome all of the above if you accept it will happen but believe its only temporary. My advice goes against some others, I say buy a house don't rent if possible. Put down some roots and fast. If you don't like it and have to move later you have no more wasted money in agents/solicitor fees than you would have in rent. I have made 1 aquaintance so far who fortuately is on the PTA at our kids school, I plan to elbow my way in there and volunteer for anything going at the school. I know that making new friends requires more effort on my part than theirs, tough but true I just have to get on with it. We soon hope to enrole our son in scouts, our daughter in ballet and my hubby is out as I type this trying to find a martial arts club to join. The effort that is required on your part is tremendous which a lot of people find hard because the move itself nearly finishes you off.
Also try and arrange for some visitors not long after you get here. It gives you something to look forward to and it help with the people sickness knowing you are going to see friends/rellies soon. For us my brother & wife are coming for 3 weeks in March, my mum, dad and my dads wife (i know, sounds like fun) are coming for the whole of April and some friends are coming for a month xmas 2003.
The purpose of this post was to try give you an idea of what to expect. We have had some fantastic family time since we have been here. We have a beautiful house close to a reserve where we will be happy for our son to go off on his bike to play soon, something that was never going to be obtainable in the UK. We are happy with our move so far but it was and still is bloody hard work, but we knew that and always accepted it which i think has helped.
I wish you all luck and stamina for you're future adventures
Paula
I've been inspired to write this post by the sense of negativity on this site lately and knowing what frightening reading it can make from the UK.
So here's my experience/advice for what its worth having been in NZ for 2 months.
The upheaval is hard the goodbyes are even worse and just when you think the worst hurdles have been jumped when you get on the plane - actually you've only just started!(only this time youv'e got no-one to look after the kids whilst you sort things out!).
The first few months are the hardest, my advice grit you're teeth get your head down and get on with it, you will come out the other end knackered but pleased with you're progress.
The sheer effort involved in day to day life in what is essentially an alien enviroment is exauhsting (esp for those of us who have not visited/have no friends or rellies in the place we are going to). You promise youreself that you are making this move for the good of your kids yet you will spend the 1st few months dragging them round estate agents, car dealers, furniture shops, electrical shops and supermarkets, and it takes twice as long when you don't know the area/product names etc. You have no idea whos a good dealer, who will rip you off, what/where to avoid and you have no-one to ask you are literally flying by the seat of your pants. This is where I thinlk the homesickness sets in. After and during all this you really need a someone you know and trust to put their arm round you give you a big hug and tell you everything will be ok (and offer to look after the kids!) You miss the experienced advice of your parents/peers, never mind needing to know if you have done the right thing moving you don't even know if you have bought a decent make washing machine!
Also you have no history here, you can't point to pub/restaurant and say remember when we...! Or point to a hospital and say to the kids you were born there or a house and say to them I/dad/nannie grew up there.
You recognise no faces in your local supermarket/high street.
This is a positive post honest, you can overcome all of the above if you accept it will happen but believe its only temporary. My advice goes against some others, I say buy a house don't rent if possible. Put down some roots and fast. If you don't like it and have to move later you have no more wasted money in agents/solicitor fees than you would have in rent. I have made 1 aquaintance so far who fortuately is on the PTA at our kids school, I plan to elbow my way in there and volunteer for anything going at the school. I know that making new friends requires more effort on my part than theirs, tough but true I just have to get on with it. We soon hope to enrole our son in scouts, our daughter in ballet and my hubby is out as I type this trying to find a martial arts club to join. The effort that is required on your part is tremendous which a lot of people find hard because the move itself nearly finishes you off.
Also try and arrange for some visitors not long after you get here. It gives you something to look forward to and it help with the people sickness knowing you are going to see friends/rellies soon. For us my brother & wife are coming for 3 weeks in March, my mum, dad and my dads wife (i know, sounds like fun) are coming for the whole of April and some friends are coming for a month xmas 2003.
The purpose of this post was to try give you an idea of what to expect. We have had some fantastic family time since we have been here. We have a beautiful house close to a reserve where we will be happy for our son to go off on his bike to play soon, something that was never going to be obtainable in the UK. We are happy with our move so far but it was and still is bloody hard work, but we knew that and always accepted it which i think has helped.
I wish you all luck and stamina for you're future adventures
Paula
Paula
what an excellent post .. I found this website only this week and have been getting more and more concerned by what I am reading ... I was looking for info about electrical stores when I found this post ... Our plans are to move to Perth in January with kids aged 17 and 13... Like your advice about buying .. I was thinking along these lines anyway as property prices are moving so fast I don't want to be out of the market too long .
Anyway I'd love to hear how you are getting on 6 months down the line
best wishes to you and yours
Fiona
Sep 20th 2003, 5:18 pm
#48
BE Forum Addict
Joined: Jun 2003
Location: Eatons Hill, Brisbane
Posts: 2,289
Re: How it feels to try and build a new life!
Originally posted by Watt Dabney
I've been inspired to write this post by the sense of negativity on this site lately and knowing what frightening reading it can make from the UK.
So here's my experience/advice for what its worth having been in NZ for 2 months.
The upheaval is hard the goodbyes are even worse and just when you think the worst hurdles have been jumped when you get on the plane - actually you've only just started!(only this time youv'e got no-one to look after the kids whilst you sort things out!).
The first few months are the hardest, my advice grit you're teeth get your head down and get on with it, you will come out the other end knackered but pleased with you're progress.
The sheer effort involved in day to day life in what is essentially an alien enviroment is exauhsting (esp for those of us who have not visited/have no friends or rellies in the place we are going to). You promise youreself that you are making this move for the good of your kids yet you will spend the 1st few months dragging them round estate agents, car dealers, furniture shops, electrical shops and supermarkets, and it takes twice as long when you don't know the area/product names etc. You have no idea whos a good dealer, who will rip you off, what/where to avoid and you have no-one to ask you are literally flying by the seat of your pants. This is where I thinlk the homesickness sets in. After and during all this you really need a someone you know and trust to put their arm round you give you a big hug and tell you everything will be ok (and offer to look after the kids!) You miss the experienced advice of your parents/peers, never mind needing to know if you have done the right thing moving you don't even know if you have bought a decent make washing machine!
Also you have no history here, you can't point to pub/restaurant and say remember when we...! Or point to a hospital and say to the kids you were born there or a house and say to them I/dad/nannie grew up there.
You recognise no faces in your local supermarket/high street.
This is a positive post honest, you can overcome all of the above if you accept it will happen but believe its only temporary. My advice goes against some others, I say buy a house don't rent if possible. Put down some roots and fast. If you don't like it and have to move later you have no more wasted money in agents/solicitor fees than you would have in rent. I have made 1 aquaintance so far who fortuately is on the PTA at our kids school, I plan to elbow my way in there and volunteer for anything going at the school. I know that making new friends requires more effort on my part than theirs, tough but true I just have to get on with it. We soon hope to enrole our son in scouts, our daughter in ballet and my hubby is out as I type this trying to find a martial arts club to join. The effort that is required on your part is tremendous which a lot of people find hard because the move itself nearly finishes you off.
Also try and arrange for some visitors not long after you get here. It gives you something to look forward to and it help with the people sickness knowing you are going to see friends/rellies soon. For us my brother & wife are coming for 3 weeks in March, my mum, dad and my dads wife (i know, sounds like fun) are coming for the whole of April and some friends are coming for a month xmas 2003.
The purpose of this post was to try give you an idea of what to expect. We have had some fantastic family time since we have been here. We have a beautiful house close to a reserve where we will be happy for our son to go off on his bike to play soon, something that was never going to be obtainable in the UK. We are happy with our move so far but it was and still is bloody hard work, but we knew that and always accepted it which i think has helped.
I wish you all luck and stamina for you're future adventures
Paula
I've been inspired to write this post by the sense of negativity on this site lately and knowing what frightening reading it can make from the UK.
So here's my experience/advice for what its worth having been in NZ for 2 months.
The upheaval is hard the goodbyes are even worse and just when you think the worst hurdles have been jumped when you get on the plane - actually you've only just started!(only this time youv'e got no-one to look after the kids whilst you sort things out!).
The first few months are the hardest, my advice grit you're teeth get your head down and get on with it, you will come out the other end knackered but pleased with you're progress.
The sheer effort involved in day to day life in what is essentially an alien enviroment is exauhsting (esp for those of us who have not visited/have no friends or rellies in the place we are going to). You promise youreself that you are making this move for the good of your kids yet you will spend the 1st few months dragging them round estate agents, car dealers, furniture shops, electrical shops and supermarkets, and it takes twice as long when you don't know the area/product names etc. You have no idea whos a good dealer, who will rip you off, what/where to avoid and you have no-one to ask you are literally flying by the seat of your pants. This is where I thinlk the homesickness sets in. After and during all this you really need a someone you know and trust to put their arm round you give you a big hug and tell you everything will be ok (and offer to look after the kids!) You miss the experienced advice of your parents/peers, never mind needing to know if you have done the right thing moving you don't even know if you have bought a decent make washing machine!
Also you have no history here, you can't point to pub/restaurant and say remember when we...! Or point to a hospital and say to the kids you were born there or a house and say to them I/dad/nannie grew up there.
You recognise no faces in your local supermarket/high street.
This is a positive post honest, you can overcome all of the above if you accept it will happen but believe its only temporary. My advice goes against some others, I say buy a house don't rent if possible. Put down some roots and fast. If you don't like it and have to move later you have no more wasted money in agents/solicitor fees than you would have in rent. I have made 1 aquaintance so far who fortuately is on the PTA at our kids school, I plan to elbow my way in there and volunteer for anything going at the school. I know that making new friends requires more effort on my part than theirs, tough but true I just have to get on with it. We soon hope to enrole our son in scouts, our daughter in ballet and my hubby is out as I type this trying to find a martial arts club to join. The effort that is required on your part is tremendous which a lot of people find hard because the move itself nearly finishes you off.
Also try and arrange for some visitors not long after you get here. It gives you something to look forward to and it help with the people sickness knowing you are going to see friends/rellies soon. For us my brother & wife are coming for 3 weeks in March, my mum, dad and my dads wife (i know, sounds like fun) are coming for the whole of April and some friends are coming for a month xmas 2003.
The purpose of this post was to try give you an idea of what to expect. We have had some fantastic family time since we have been here. We have a beautiful house close to a reserve where we will be happy for our son to go off on his bike to play soon, something that was never going to be obtainable in the UK. We are happy with our move so far but it was and still is bloody hard work, but we knew that and always accepted it which i think has helped.
I wish you all luck and stamina for you're future adventures
Paula
thanks Paula
what an honest post
wishing you the very best of luck with your futures
best wishes
rach, mark and chanelle
Sep 20th 2003, 5:46 pm
#49
Guest
Posts: n/a
Re: How it feels to try and build a new life!
Originally posted by Watt Dabney
I've been inspired to write this post by the sense of negativity on this site lately and knowing what frightening reading it can make from the UK.
So here's my experience/advice for what its worth having been in NZ for 2 months.
The upheaval is hard the goodbyes are even worse and just when you think the worst hurdles have been jumped when you get on the plane - actually you've only just started!(only this time youv'e got no-one to look after the kids whilst you sort things out!).
The first few months are the hardest, my advice grit you're teeth get your head down and get on with it, you will come out the other end knackered but pleased with you're progress.
The sheer effort involved in day to day life in what is essentially an alien enviroment is exauhsting (esp for those of us who have not visited/have no friends or rellies in the place we are going to). You promise youreself that you are making this move for the good of your kids yet you will spend the 1st few months dragging them round estate agents, car dealers, furniture shops, electrical shops and supermarkets, and it takes twice as long when you don't know the area/product names etc. You have no idea whos a good dealer, who will rip you off, what/where to avoid and you have no-one to ask you are literally flying by the seat of your pants. This is where I thinlk the homesickness sets in. After and during all this you really need a someone you know and trust to put their arm round you give you a big hug and tell you everything will be ok (and offer to look after the kids!) You miss the experienced advice of your parents/peers, never mind needing to know if you have done the right thing moving you don't even know if you have bought a decent make washing machine!
Also you have no history here, you can't point to pub/restaurant and say remember when we...! Or point to a hospital and say to the kids you were born there or a house and say to them I/dad/nannie grew up there.
You recognise no faces in your local supermarket/high street.
This is a positive post honest, you can overcome all of the above if you accept it will happen but believe its only temporary. My advice goes against some others, I say buy a house don't rent if possible. Put down some roots and fast. If you don't like it and have to move later you have no more wasted money in agents/solicitor fees than you would have in rent. I have made 1 aquaintance so far who fortuately is on the PTA at our kids school, I plan to elbow my way in there and volunteer for anything going at the school. I know that making new friends requires more effort on my part than theirs, tough but true I just have to get on with it. We soon hope to enrole our son in scouts, our daughter in ballet and my hubby is out as I type this trying to find a martial arts club to join. The effort that is required on your part is tremendous which a lot of people find hard because the move itself nearly finishes you off.
Also try and arrange for some visitors not long after you get here. It gives you something to look forward to and it help with the people sickness knowing you are going to see friends/rellies soon. For us my brother & wife are coming for 3 weeks in March, my mum, dad and my dads wife (i know, sounds like fun) are coming for the whole of April and some friends are coming for a month xmas 2003.
The purpose of this post was to try give you an idea of what to expect. We have had some fantastic family time since we have been here. We have a beautiful house close to a reserve where we will be happy for our son to go off on his bike to play soon, something that was never going to be obtainable in the UK. We are happy with our move so far but it was and still is bloody hard work, but we knew that and always accepted it which i think has helped.
I wish you all luck and stamina for you're future adventures
Paula
I've been inspired to write this post by the sense of negativity on this site lately and knowing what frightening reading it can make from the UK.
So here's my experience/advice for what its worth having been in NZ for 2 months.
The upheaval is hard the goodbyes are even worse and just when you think the worst hurdles have been jumped when you get on the plane - actually you've only just started!(only this time youv'e got no-one to look after the kids whilst you sort things out!).
The first few months are the hardest, my advice grit you're teeth get your head down and get on with it, you will come out the other end knackered but pleased with you're progress.
The sheer effort involved in day to day life in what is essentially an alien enviroment is exauhsting (esp for those of us who have not visited/have no friends or rellies in the place we are going to). You promise youreself that you are making this move for the good of your kids yet you will spend the 1st few months dragging them round estate agents, car dealers, furniture shops, electrical shops and supermarkets, and it takes twice as long when you don't know the area/product names etc. You have no idea whos a good dealer, who will rip you off, what/where to avoid and you have no-one to ask you are literally flying by the seat of your pants. This is where I thinlk the homesickness sets in. After and during all this you really need a someone you know and trust to put their arm round you give you a big hug and tell you everything will be ok (and offer to look after the kids!) You miss the experienced advice of your parents/peers, never mind needing to know if you have done the right thing moving you don't even know if you have bought a decent make washing machine!
Also you have no history here, you can't point to pub/restaurant and say remember when we...! Or point to a hospital and say to the kids you were born there or a house and say to them I/dad/nannie grew up there.
You recognise no faces in your local supermarket/high street.
This is a positive post honest, you can overcome all of the above if you accept it will happen but believe its only temporary. My advice goes against some others, I say buy a house don't rent if possible. Put down some roots and fast. If you don't like it and have to move later you have no more wasted money in agents/solicitor fees than you would have in rent. I have made 1 aquaintance so far who fortuately is on the PTA at our kids school, I plan to elbow my way in there and volunteer for anything going at the school. I know that making new friends requires more effort on my part than theirs, tough but true I just have to get on with it. We soon hope to enrole our son in scouts, our daughter in ballet and my hubby is out as I type this trying to find a martial arts club to join. The effort that is required on your part is tremendous which a lot of people find hard because the move itself nearly finishes you off.
Also try and arrange for some visitors not long after you get here. It gives you something to look forward to and it help with the people sickness knowing you are going to see friends/rellies soon. For us my brother & wife are coming for 3 weeks in March, my mum, dad and my dads wife (i know, sounds like fun) are coming for the whole of April and some friends are coming for a month xmas 2003.
The purpose of this post was to try give you an idea of what to expect. We have had some fantastic family time since we have been here. We have a beautiful house close to a reserve where we will be happy for our son to go off on his bike to play soon, something that was never going to be obtainable in the UK. We are happy with our move so far but it was and still is bloody hard work, but we knew that and always accepted it which i think has helped.
I wish you all luck and stamina for you're future adventures
Paula
great post - thanks for taking the time to write
Sep 20th 2003, 7:10 pm
#50
Banned
Joined: Feb 2003
Posts: 3,467
Excellent post, my sons behaviour can be extremely challenging, he started nursery this thursday and was sat in the quiet corner because of bad behaviour on his first morning there. I am hoping the teachers in NZ are more sympathetic and informed.
About property we thought the same ... buy quickly then you are in the market straight away. I cant see the point in renting it is dead money.
Keep posting
About property we thought the same ... buy quickly then you are in the market straight away. I cant see the point in renting it is dead money.
Keep posting
Sep 20th 2003, 9:22 pm
#51
BE Enthusiast
Joined: Jul 2002
Posts: 404
Re: How it feels to try and build a new life!
Originally posted by Watt Dabney
I've been inspired to write this post by the sense of negativity on this site lately and knowing what frightening reading it can make from the UK.
So here's my experience/advice for what its worth having been in NZ for 2 months.
The upheaval is hard the goodbyes are even worse and just when you think the worst hurdles have been jumped when you get on the plane - actually you've only just started!(only this time youv'e got no-one to look after the kids whilst you sort things out!).
The first few months are the hardest, my advice grit you're teeth get your head down and get on with it, you will come out the other end knackered but pleased with you're progress.
The sheer effort involved in day to day life in what is essentially an alien enviroment is exauhsting (esp for those of us who have not visited/have no friends or rellies in the place we are going to). You promise youreself that you are making this move for the good of your kids yet you will spend the 1st few months dragging them round estate agents, car dealers, furniture shops, electrical shops and supermarkets, and it takes twice as long when you don't know the area/product names etc. You have no idea whos a good dealer, who will rip you off, what/where to avoid and you have no-one to ask you are literally flying by the seat of your pants. This is where I thinlk the homesickness sets in. After and during all this you really need a someone you know and trust to put their arm round you give you a big hug and tell you everything will be ok (and offer to look after the kids!) You miss the experienced advice of your parents/peers, never mind needing to know if you have done the right thing moving you don't even know if you have bought a decent make washing machine!
Also you have no history here, you can't point to pub/restaurant and say remember when we...! Or point to a hospital and say to the kids you were born there or a house and say to them I/dad/nannie grew up there.
You recognise no faces in your local supermarket/high street.
This is a positive post honest, you can overcome all of the above if you accept it will happen but believe its only temporary. My advice goes against some others, I say buy a house don't rent if possible. Put down some roots and fast. If you don't like it and have to move later you have no more wasted money in agents/solicitor fees than you would have in rent. I have made 1 aquaintance so far who fortuately is on the PTA at our kids school, I plan to elbow my way in there and volunteer for anything going at the school. I know that making new friends requires more effort on my part than theirs, tough but true I just have to get on with it. We soon hope to enrole our son in scouts, our daughter in ballet and my hubby is out as I type this trying to find a martial arts club to join. The effort that is required on your part is tremendous which a lot of people find hard because the move itself nearly finishes you off.
Also try and arrange for some visitors not long after you get here. It gives you something to look forward to and it help with the people sickness knowing you are going to see friends/rellies soon. For us my brother & wife are coming for 3 weeks in March, my mum, dad and my dads wife (i know, sounds like fun) are coming for the whole of April and some friends are coming for a month xmas 2003.
The purpose of this post was to try give you an idea of what to expect. We have had some fantastic family time since we have been here. We have a beautiful house close to a reserve where we will be happy for our son to go off on his bike to play soon, something that was never going to be obtainable in the UK. We are happy with our move so far but it was and still is bloody hard work, but we knew that and always accepted it which i think has helped.
I wish you all luck and stamina for you're future adventures
Paula
I've been inspired to write this post by the sense of negativity on this site lately and knowing what frightening reading it can make from the UK.
So here's my experience/advice for what its worth having been in NZ for 2 months.
The upheaval is hard the goodbyes are even worse and just when you think the worst hurdles have been jumped when you get on the plane - actually you've only just started!(only this time youv'e got no-one to look after the kids whilst you sort things out!).
The first few months are the hardest, my advice grit you're teeth get your head down and get on with it, you will come out the other end knackered but pleased with you're progress.
The sheer effort involved in day to day life in what is essentially an alien enviroment is exauhsting (esp for those of us who have not visited/have no friends or rellies in the place we are going to). You promise youreself that you are making this move for the good of your kids yet you will spend the 1st few months dragging them round estate agents, car dealers, furniture shops, electrical shops and supermarkets, and it takes twice as long when you don't know the area/product names etc. You have no idea whos a good dealer, who will rip you off, what/where to avoid and you have no-one to ask you are literally flying by the seat of your pants. This is where I thinlk the homesickness sets in. After and during all this you really need a someone you know and trust to put their arm round you give you a big hug and tell you everything will be ok (and offer to look after the kids!) You miss the experienced advice of your parents/peers, never mind needing to know if you have done the right thing moving you don't even know if you have bought a decent make washing machine!
Also you have no history here, you can't point to pub/restaurant and say remember when we...! Or point to a hospital and say to the kids you were born there or a house and say to them I/dad/nannie grew up there.
You recognise no faces in your local supermarket/high street.
This is a positive post honest, you can overcome all of the above if you accept it will happen but believe its only temporary. My advice goes against some others, I say buy a house don't rent if possible. Put down some roots and fast. If you don't like it and have to move later you have no more wasted money in agents/solicitor fees than you would have in rent. I have made 1 aquaintance so far who fortuately is on the PTA at our kids school, I plan to elbow my way in there and volunteer for anything going at the school. I know that making new friends requires more effort on my part than theirs, tough but true I just have to get on with it. We soon hope to enrole our son in scouts, our daughter in ballet and my hubby is out as I type this trying to find a martial arts club to join. The effort that is required on your part is tremendous which a lot of people find hard because the move itself nearly finishes you off.
Also try and arrange for some visitors not long after you get here. It gives you something to look forward to and it help with the people sickness knowing you are going to see friends/rellies soon. For us my brother & wife are coming for 3 weeks in March, my mum, dad and my dads wife (i know, sounds like fun) are coming for the whole of April and some friends are coming for a month xmas 2003.
The purpose of this post was to try give you an idea of what to expect. We have had some fantastic family time since we have been here. We have a beautiful house close to a reserve where we will be happy for our son to go off on his bike to play soon, something that was never going to be obtainable in the UK. We are happy with our move so far but it was and still is bloody hard work, but we knew that and always accepted it which i think has helped.
I wish you all luck and stamina for you're future adventures
Paula
I think you have the right stuff if you know what i mean.......
But dont try to be all thing to all people take time for yourself :lecture:.......
Sep 20th 2003, 10:15 pm
#52
BE Forum Addict
Joined: Sep 2003
Posts: 2,666
Good post!!
I moved to Auckland from London two years ago. I have to say it was a real shock to the system, and i am married to a kiwi! The daft thing is we are now upping sticks again and going to Adelaide.
I can really relate to what you said in your post. I found it much more difficult to make friends as my kids are all grown up and still back in London. It is very true that the onus is on you to make friends. Knowing how to do it when you have spent your entire life amongst people you have known since childhood, is a very hard task...i felt socially inept...LOL. But i found the experience interesting. It also makes you look at yourself in an entirely different way.
Having gone through all the loneliness, homesickness and feelings of isolation, and just as i have got myself settled, hubby gets a job in Oz!... One thing i do know though. It wont be as tough this time becuse i know what i am letting myself in for.
I was really miserable for the first 6mths in NZ. But now i am really glad i took the plunge. I have discovered a lot about who i am, my strengths and weaknesses, and my ability to adapt to change. I now feel a lot more confident and have more tools to deal with new beginnings.... look out Adelaide here i come! :scared:
I moved to Auckland from London two years ago. I have to say it was a real shock to the system, and i am married to a kiwi! The daft thing is we are now upping sticks again and going to Adelaide.
I can really relate to what you said in your post. I found it much more difficult to make friends as my kids are all grown up and still back in London. It is very true that the onus is on you to make friends. Knowing how to do it when you have spent your entire life amongst people you have known since childhood, is a very hard task...i felt socially inept...LOL. But i found the experience interesting. It also makes you look at yourself in an entirely different way.
Having gone through all the loneliness, homesickness and feelings of isolation, and just as i have got myself settled, hubby gets a job in Oz!... One thing i do know though. It wont be as tough this time becuse i know what i am letting myself in for.
I was really miserable for the first 6mths in NZ. But now i am really glad i took the plunge. I have discovered a lot about who i am, my strengths and weaknesses, and my ability to adapt to change. I now feel a lot more confident and have more tools to deal with new beginnings.... look out Adelaide here i come! :scared:
Sep 21st 2003, 1:53 am
#53
Non-addicted member!
Joined: Nov 2001
Location: Nelson, New Zealand
Posts: 343
Nice one Paula, there's a lot of head nodding while reading your post, we've experienced the same things. We've been here since the start of July & you're right, it is bloody hard work!
But soon the fears and doubts soon start to fade as your new life starts taking shape. As you know Paula, we couldn't make our bloody minds up where to live for the first 6 weeks! Up and down between Ch/ch & here! Cost us a fortune.
Now we are settled & have all (3 of us) found good jobs that we enjoy (what a relief)
Getting our weekly budgets in order etc. Knowing only a few weeks ago, we had no jobs & were seriously getting down as our saving were being eaten up!
Know what you mean about the washing machines. Did you mean rent & don't buy a house? I read it several times & still abit confused as to what you meant. We are still renting & will continue to for a while yet.
I'll be down your way on Wednesday Paula, I may pop in for a cuppa! I've got to fly down and ride a rental bike (VFR800)back up here for work. Not a bad days work eh!
To all those that have all this to come, good luck, you'll be right, just believe!!!
But soon the fears and doubts soon start to fade as your new life starts taking shape. As you know Paula, we couldn't make our bloody minds up where to live for the first 6 weeks! Up and down between Ch/ch & here! Cost us a fortune.
Now we are settled & have all (3 of us) found good jobs that we enjoy (what a relief)
Getting our weekly budgets in order etc. Knowing only a few weeks ago, we had no jobs & were seriously getting down as our saving were being eaten up!
Know what you mean about the washing machines. Did you mean rent & don't buy a house? I read it several times & still abit confused as to what you meant. We are still renting & will continue to for a while yet.
I'll be down your way on Wednesday Paula, I may pop in for a cuppa! I've got to fly down and ride a rental bike (VFR800)back up here for work. Not a bad days work eh!
To all those that have all this to come, good luck, you'll be right, just believe!!!
Sep 21st 2003, 4:14 am
#54
Just Joined
Joined: Aug 2003
Location: Wellington
Posts: 28
I agree - interesting post and helpful to those about to make the NZ leap i hope. I do thin kthought that the hardest bit of coming here is after about 6 months. Things aren't such a novelty and you can begin to feel home sick (and particularly people sick). I found the first 3 months very exciting - so much to do, so little time and all that. The test is settling into life and making those lifelong changes you talked about in the UK. it can be easy to fall into the same old routines - new country, same old shit!!
Sep 21st 2003, 10:22 am
#55
Inverted Firkin Inventor
Thread Starter
Joined: Aug 2002
Posts: 757
Originally posted by garrisondamn
Nice one Paula, there's a lot of head nodding while reading your post, we've experienced the same things. We've been here since the start of July & you're right, it is bloody hard work!
But soon the fears and doubts soon start to fade as your new life starts taking shape. As you know Paula, we couldn't make our bloody minds up where to live for the first 6 weeks! Up and down between Ch/ch & here! Cost us a fortune.
Now we are settled & have all (3 of us) found good jobs that we enjoy (what a relief)
Getting our weekly budgets in order etc. Knowing only a few weeks ago, we had no jobs & were seriously getting down as our saving were being eaten up!
Know what you mean about the washing machines. Did you mean rent & don't buy a house? I read it several times & still abit confused as to what you meant. We are still renting & will continue to for a while yet.
I'll be down your way on Wednesday Paula, I may pop in for a cuppa! I've got to fly down and ride a rental bike (VFR800)back up here for work. Not a bad days work eh!
To all those that have all this to come, good luck, you'll be right, just believe!!!
Nice one Paula, there's a lot of head nodding while reading your post, we've experienced the same things. We've been here since the start of July & you're right, it is bloody hard work!
But soon the fears and doubts soon start to fade as your new life starts taking shape. As you know Paula, we couldn't make our bloody minds up where to live for the first 6 weeks! Up and down between Ch/ch & here! Cost us a fortune.
Now we are settled & have all (3 of us) found good jobs that we enjoy (what a relief)
Getting our weekly budgets in order etc. Knowing only a few weeks ago, we had no jobs & were seriously getting down as our saving were being eaten up!
Know what you mean about the washing machines. Did you mean rent & don't buy a house? I read it several times & still abit confused as to what you meant. We are still renting & will continue to for a while yet.
I'll be down your way on Wednesday Paula, I may pop in for a cuppa! I've got to fly down and ride a rental bike (VFR800)back up here for work. Not a bad days work eh!
To all those that have all this to come, good luck, you'll be right, just believe!!!
Hi Guys,
Blimey this post is a getting on a bit!
Alan, you're more than welcome to pop in for a cuppa, you're new job sounds great , what is it exactly. I just told Ian you have a job which involves riding a bike from here to Nelson not quite sure what he said, a lot of muttering under his breath but I am sure I caught "lucky b***ard!"
I meant buy a house early. The market here is quite hot and property is gaining value quite rapidly. If you find somewhere else you would rather live in a year or so you will lose no more in selling and re-buying fees than you would have in rent.
Anyway to all who are interested, we are still very happy. I still haven't experienced any real homesickness, been here 10 months + now. Kids are very settled at school and I am an extreamly active member of the PTA. Cash left over at the end of the week is about the same as the UK. Our lifestyle is much improved, we live in a 4 bed detached 5 mins from the coast. This was quite simply unobtainable in the Uk.
NZ gives us the opportunity to indulge in our passion of motorsports/motorbikes more than the UK. To us NZ is full of people like us, hard working, ambitious but a little rough round the edges and we feel very at home. Unlike the Uk where we just felt judged.
Paula
