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Have we really given it long enough ????

Have we really given it long enough ????

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Old Feb 9th 2012, 8:48 pm
  #1  
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Default Have we really given it long enough ????

Hi Guys

Not posted on here for awhile with trying to get myself into my new life in Oz and what a roller coaster of ride it has been.

One minute me saying I want to go home and then my partner saying he does I feel like a damn well yo yo most days.

We have been here in Perth for 5 months and yes have we seriously given it long enough this is the big question?

After all that hard work to get here to throw the towel in so soon seems such a waste.

If we did go back to the UK our visa ends in June so couldnt get back in not even on a Resident Returns Visa because we havent been here 2 years out of the 5 years.

There is a part of me that is saying stop acting like a whinging POM and get on with it even for another 18 months at least that way if we do go back we can say we have given it a good go and we can get RRV for a further 5 years.

So difficult as to know what to do at times sorry for the whinge ....

Debs
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Old Feb 9th 2012, 9:01 pm
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Default Re: Have we really given it long enough ????

It doesn't seem like long enough to me. If you were saying that you hate the place and don't care about visa running out then perhaps you should go back now rather than try to stick at it. However the fact that you are concerned about RRV and visa expiry suggests that there is some par to fyou that wants this to work out? So try a bit longer is my advice.
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Old Feb 9th 2012, 9:05 pm
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Default Re: Have we really given it long enough ????

Debs, this is the type of question asked many times here, and what you will get is opinions (as you are probably expecting).
My opinion is, stick it out until you are eligible for an RRV if finances and immediate family allow. At least then you have option for the future.
I lived in Oz for 12 years and became a citizen, eventually I grew tired of Oz and came back to the UK, but am glad I stuck it out to get the passport as I can now return when I want.
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Old Feb 9th 2012, 9:43 pm
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Default Re: Have we really given it long enough ????

Originally Posted by debs1966
Hi Guys

Not posted on here for awhile with trying to get myself into my new life in Oz and what a roller coaster of ride it has been.

One minute me saying I want to go home and then my partner saying he does I feel like a damn well yo yo most days.

We have been here in Perth for 5 months and yes have we seriously given it long enough this is the big question?

After all that hard work to get here to throw the towel in so soon seems such a waste.

If we did go back to the UK our visa ends in June so couldnt get back in not even on a Resident Returns Visa because we havent been here 2 years out of the 5 years.

There is a part of me that is saying stop acting like a whinging POM and get on with it even for another 18 months at least that way if we do go back we can say we have given it a good go and we can get RRV for a further 5 years.

So difficult as to know what to do at times sorry for the whinge ....

Debs
Where abouts in Perth are you Debs? I've replied to your post in the meetups section - the NOR book(less) group is meeting at my house in March but I'm happy to meet up with you for coffee if you like. I work during the day but would be happy to meet up after work or on a weekend.

I honestly think 5 months is probably too soon, but you have to do what feels right for you. If I remember right it was at about 5 or 6 months that I had my first wobble. Having a job I liked and meeting with people I clicked with really helped though. Once we moved interstate to Perth I went through the whole upheaval thing again and had seriously thought of going home. But again, meeting people and getting out to work really helped.
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Old Feb 9th 2012, 10:18 pm
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Default Re: Have we really given it long enough ????

FWIW we were quite content for the first few years but as time goes on less so. However, it's a big move with many costs, so I agree with the others that you might regret leaving before being eligible for a RRV - and, who knows, you might find your feet in that time. Certainly 5 months isn't anything like enough time to get past the running in stage.
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Old Feb 9th 2012, 10:43 pm
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Default Re: Have we really given it long enough ????

5 - 6 months is always the point when most people feel a little 'wobbly' - it's when all the newness starts to wear off and reality sets in!

Give it another 6 months and see how you feel then.

I might be biased since I have met her...but Dorothy is such a lovely lady, you'd be made not to take her up on her offer.
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Old Feb 9th 2012, 11:22 pm
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Default Re: Have we really given it long enough ????

I think it's too soon. I think it takes at least a year to get to know people properly, two years to get to know an area well enough to feel comfortable in it, three years to feel you have as much right to be here as the locals, four years to have established a firm base and really start branching out and discovering the great opportunities available.

I hope things get better for you, good luck!
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Old Feb 9th 2012, 11:30 pm
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Default Re: Have we really given it long enough ????

Originally Posted by Wendy
5 - 6 months is always the point when most people feel a little 'wobbly' - it's when all the newness starts to wear off and reality sets in!

Give it another 6 months and see how you feel then.

I might be biased since I have met her...but Dorothy is such a lovely lady, you'd be made not to take her up on her offer.
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Old Feb 9th 2012, 11:32 pm
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Default Re: Have we really given it long enough ????

It's tough but I don't think 5 months is long enough either - knuckle down long enough to get the RRV if you can stand it. Can you link up with the Perth expats? Download a wad of English tv? Order parcels of M&S, John Lewis and all the things that improve life - (well, at least for me as I'm an internet shopoholic)

It would be a great shame to pull the plug before achieving the right to return but I know it's hard trying to stick it out when you just want to leave. Chin up
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Old Feb 9th 2012, 11:56 pm
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Default Re: Have we really given it long enough ????

No.

I've had rashes that have lasted longer.
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Old Feb 9th 2012, 11:59 pm
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Lightbulb Re: Have we really given it long enough ????

1 year is a good time for your first serious assessment. 2 years is long enough to know whether or not it'll work long term.

5 months is too early.
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Old Feb 10th 2012, 12:34 am
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Default Re: Have we really given it long enough ????

5 months is nowhere near long enough. After 5 months, we were still longing to go home. Now we've nearly been here a year and have got to know a couple of people and not feeling as home sick. I think after another year we will be completely settled.

If you went home after 5 months, I think you'd regret it, especially as there's no chance of an easy return. Live it a month at a time and stop thinking that it's forever - as you can leave when you want.
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Old Feb 10th 2012, 1:06 am
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Default Re: Have we really given it long enough ????

I don't think 5 months is long enough. A year maybe, although I think that by two years most people have settled if they are going to.

If you're asking yourself now if 5 months is enough then I imagine going back to the UK would make you ask if you came back too soon. Personally, I wouldn't go back until you are really, really sure you've given it everything you've got. If you don't you might find yourself ping ponging. Better to do it right the first time then to do a bunch of half hearted attempts.
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Old Feb 10th 2012, 1:10 am
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Default Re: Have we really given it long enough ????

Originally Posted by Vash the Stampede
1 year is a good time for your first serious assessment. 2 years is long enough to know whether or not it'll work long term.

5 months is too early.
Agree with this as well. At five months, I was still homesick.

Two years lets you see the situation a lot more clearly, and gives you the RRV option if you want it.
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Old Feb 10th 2012, 3:50 am
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Default Re: Have we really given it long enough ????

Originally Posted by debs1966
Hi Guys

Not posted on here for awhile with trying to get myself into my new life in Oz and what a roller coaster of ride it has been.

One minute me saying I want to go home and then my partner saying he does I feel like a damn well yo yo most days.

We have been here in Perth for 5 months and yes have we seriously given it long enough this is the big question?

After all that hard work to get here to throw the towel in so soon seems such a waste.

If we did go back to the UK our visa ends in June so couldnt get back in not even on a Resident Returns Visa because we havent been here 2 years out of the 5 years.

There is a part of me that is saying stop acting like a whinging POM and get on with it even for another 18 months at least that way if we do go back we can say we have given it a good go and we can get RRV for a further 5 years.

So difficult as to know what to do at times sorry for the whinge ....

Debs
You came to Oz because you wanted to but I emigrated very reluctantly to please my husband and never in a million years considered living anywhere but the UK before I met him.

I hated it here so much when I first arrived and was horribly homesick that I went back to the UK for 5 weeks with our son, aged 7 months - after just 7 months.

My husband was terrified I wasn't coming back and phoned me twice a day for the entire time I was there.

I made some flippant comment to him at the time along the lines of: "Don't be ridiculous. Of course I'm coming back to Australia. I would have taken more clothes with me I was staying in England".

That was 9 years ago and I am still here. Can't see myself returning to the UK anytime soon - unless we win the lotto of course

So like others have said stick it out a bit longer kiddo. You owe it yourselves after putting so much effort into getting here.
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