Wenz

Give this serious consideration before taking the leap of faith.."How would you feel and cope if you were unable to get home to pay your final respects to loved ones?"

I've not mentioned this to the group before as I'm a 'cope alone sort of guy' but my dearest Mum passed away on Boxing day and after the initial shock the next stage was the burning desire to get home for the funeral and to be alongside my family.
The reason for me telling you this now is that in other threads some have mentioned having a seperate stash of emrgency funds to get a ticket home if the need arise. Its just not as easy at all that.

The problem is not just financial but more often and this was my experience... "No seats available anwhere" no matter how hard I looked. All flights fully booked for the next 7 days at least I was told by everyone.

I had an emergency fund already in place to get home but still could not get a flight back in time for the funeral. So Instead I spent the day feeling guilty and sat on the beach looking out to sea. Same thing on the day of the funeral too.
My only comfort being the fact that My Mum was always truly behind us in the move out here and was happy in the knowledge we were building ourselves a better life.

Just be aware that having the money to get home doesn't mean there will be a seat free to get you home.

Wenz

DagBoy

Hi Wenz,

Twice I have been in a similar situation with friends who have died and though it must be much harder when it is family I know what you mean about the guilt. An old and dear friend from the village I grew up in died the week before I came out here and I was in the plane on my way over here when the funeral was. That one was not so bad because I got back to the village and spent time with other friends etc. after he died, so said my goodbyes then. When we went back to the UK last year (3 and a half years later) I visited his grave which helped too.

The other time I was in that situation one of my running buddies was mown down by a car and killed (the driver had a heart attack - it was just one of those wrong place wrong time things). I couldn't go to her funeral because I was out of the country with work. Instead, I just had a quiet moment to myself at the time of the funeral and went and sat in the church where it had been the next week, lit a candle and had a little cry.

I still think the important thing is the memories and the saying goodbye - I don't think it really matters where or how or when you do that. It sounds like your mum would have understood - so don't feel guilty.

Cheers,

DagBoy

MarkMyWords

Did you mention why you were flying? As I understand it, airlines keep a small reserve for just such a situation. No comfort to you of course, but perhaps of use to others.

scranty

give it consideration;you would n't go- stay here and wait for the deaths? Go;accept the consequences, realise your dream, and prepare for all affecting eventualities......

bondipom

This time of year the planes are chockers for those on Xmas holidays and those coming for the southern summer.

anya4oz

Wenz, I'm so sorry to hear about your Mom. I'm sure she would understand, though...

I asked the travel agent this very question only a couple of weeks ago & her advice was that it is very difficult to get a seat on economy class at short notice (and you will pay thru the nose if you do, too). Certainly several people I know who have done this have ended up paying silly prices.

However there is usually more availability in Business Class, and the prices for Biz Class flights back to Blighty seem cheaper from Oz to UK than from UK to Oz (have been checking them over the last 6 months & there seems to be a pattern). By the time you have paid the inflated price for a short notice economy fare, you may find that there isn't that much in it cost wise (although this will depend on a whole range of factors, like time of year, how busy the airlines are etc)

Also, if you have lost a loved one & are felling like sh*t, you will be 500 times more comfortable & better looked after in Biz Class.

It's worth looking at, perhaps & making sure your emergency fund has a little more in it for that reason.

Anya.

MarkMyWords

Plus of course various airlines do "Economy Plus" under various names which might suit some emergency budgets better than full Business Class. Then again there's potentially the same question of availability.

Simone

SJ Oldfield:
Can't get a flight.....

I fly tomorrow (to late)




I hope I and my parents(moving back here soon, both still have both parents) are never in a situation like this.
"luckily" I'm not close that to my grandparents, so I wouldn't need to go back, but my mum would, and if something happens in Pascal's family..
I would rather just ignore this, we'll see when it happens... we've always got a bit of savings anyway. Nothing else to do...

scotvness

Wenz

Your experience brings home one of those situations that 'never happens to me' but of course it will. My wife's (Australian) parents are both getting into there late seventies haven't been in the greatest health. While she spent 14 years in the UK with me I did plan for just the kind of emergency you have recently gone through, how those plans would pan-out thankfully I didn't find out. Now I find myself in the reverse situation I must admit it has crossed my mind how I will get home - WHEN the situation arises. I think if anything your story will give pause for thought, its not going to stop people getting on with life but its just one more thing that we 'The Brave' or 'The Mad' immigrants need to consider.

Regards Scot

moneypenny20

I am not cold and heartless, I just don't see the need to be at a funeral. If there is a close family member dying, I might try to get to see them, but not after the event. The person has gone, and if it were me, I would much rather everyone kept their hard earned cash and wherever they were in the world, just stopped for a moment, had a drink and remembered some silly moment we had had.

Saying that, I feel for you Wenz. It is a terrible thing to happen and it always seems harder when the loss is at christmas and family times like that. Hope you and yours are ok. All the best.

Wenz

Yes Scot thats my point, u explain things better than I do:-),
& for everyone else don't let it effect you coming, in fact if anything it goes to show that life is so very precious and its therefore important to go make the most of it when the opportunity comes your way.

& Just for the record I was told by most agents that mercy flight seating is a bit of a myth and only in extreme cases comes into play and usually for those needing a flight to see someone living as opposed for funerals. Money talks in this world unfortunatley.

& Thanks everyone for your compassion, I appreciated all your kind comments.
Wenz

joho

Do you think this is a normal situation or do you think this could have had something to do with the Tsunami. Lots of Brits were trying to get home after it hit and the position means that a lot of flights from OZ make stops as standard in the various areas (singapore for one)where it would have been inundated with brits trying to fly home thus all seats being full.

I am having big worries over this point as my husbands parents are 78 and 83 and not in great health. My hubby was born late in his parents life, we are trying not to think about it too much, but it has to be considered. We keep telling ourselves that we need to make a life for our own family for the future but it still sits there at the back of your mind.

If the death is sudden, there's not much you can do to get home for a last visit, but in a situation as S J Oldfield was in, it must be devistating knowing and not being able to do anything and then being too late. I can't imagine the heartache. You would expect to be able to get home for a funeral though it shocks me to hear that you couldn't.

Cheers Jo

Merlot

One of the high prices you pay for being 12,000 miles away, it is just awful and I understand and empathise so much.

After 7 years of it I just wanted to come back to spend time with my family before I woke up one day in Oz with the dreaded phone call that one of them had passed away.

M

Jacko1

Had this exact problem seven years ago, on Xmas day dad died in Australia, rang Quantas/BA on Boxing day they were brill sorted a seat for the following day £800 return, they dpo have contingency plans in place for these sort of tragic circumstances.

Paul J

Pollyana

Echoing this, when Sandra was trying to get her flight, I was dealing with Qantas for work (Qld govt), and asked them about it. They said if the seat is available they will do whatever they can. Unfortunately though, with them you get priority after the person has passed away, and then they like to have a faxed hospital report or similar to prove the importance.
I aave heard good reports about Qantas before, but admittedly mpstly after the person has gone. Varies from airline to airline I guess.

Sympathy to the people who have lost relatives recently, including Sandra, Wenz, and Paul & Amn-Marie.
My second cousin passed away last week - not someone that I was close enough to, that I would want to fly home, but it still reinforces the distance.