Bella

I know there are no easy answers but would like to know how others are coping with unhappy family members. Spent the weekend with my brother, sister inlaw and nephew and brother upset and he is also wondering how my folks will cope with my absence.
Feel bad!
Know it's only to be expected but it's tough isn't it?

cutgrass

I have the same problem. I'm from a large family, we all live close to each other but my wife and I are going to emigrate. She's an only child and her parents are going to follow us out there.

For a while my mother 'blamed' my wife for 'taking me away'. The situation also got worse when my younger sister and one of my younger brothers suggested that they might follow me out there in a few years. Adding more fuel to the emotional fire.

What I've started doing to make things easier is planning what will happen AFTER we're there. So we're arranging family visits, return holidays, talking about how often we'll phone.

What that seems to do is put less focus on the actual move, and more on life once you're there. It makes the move feel less of a traumatic event and gets everyone ready for the change.

It'll still hurt to go, but it should. What I'm trying to do is make them realise that I'm only a phone call, a 24 hour flight or an email away.

And of course, they're all welcome out there!

sue rose

[QUOTE]Originally posted by Bella
I know there are no easy answers but would like to know how others are coping with unhappy family members. Spent the weekend with my brother, sister inlaw and nephew and brother upset and he is also wondering how my folks will cope with my absence.
Feel bad!
Know it's only to be expected but it's tough isn't it? [/QUOTE

I fully agree with you. We are leaving behind a large family but the hardest is leaving our daughter and 6 year old grandson. Everyone has been ok about it so far but when we actually leave in August I think the reality of it all will hit home. My hubbie has set up several members of the family (including his Dad 86 and my Dad 72) with web cams so at least there will be something visual when we contact them.
We have also encouraged everyone to come out for their hol and my Dad will book his ticket very soon to come out in October.

Keep smiling there's so many means of communication about today

Good luck with all your plans

Bella

Thanks Bidd & cutgrass.
Really good to get your empathy.
Also, I really like the idea of talking about what happens after we get to Oz. Will put this into action.

It seems Bidd that you're in a very difficult situation, almost like your emotions are being manipulated.

I broke the news to my parents in stages. Told them a little at a time as it felt far too difficult to tell everything all at once.

I understand how they feel and that we are in control of the situation and they aren't. Hopefully it will get better once we're there???? Or am I wishful thinking? .........!

Bella

[QUOTE]Originally posted by sue rose
You're absolutely right Sue re methods of communication. Imagine what it was like before e mail, cheap phone calls, web cams etc!
Really empathise with you leaving your grandson.

We're setting up a site on the web that friends and family can access with photos of all our adventures to keep them informed and involved.

Pollyana

My sister and her family haven't got into the realms of the net & webcams yet, though I think my emigration may push them along. In the meantime though she has told the kids (9,7 & 2) that as I won't see them for a while she will make use of the video camera and they can send me video letters. As the older ones also do a lot of drama & singing, they are going to put this on tape as well. They seemed to like the idea that I will show the videos to my fiance's family in OZ - they think they are famous now!