Attention all Brickies
Apr 22nd 2004, 7:30 pm
#1
Monaco here we!!! oh no
Thread Starter
Joined: Aug 2003
Location: Bexleyheath Kent
Posts: 411
Attention all Brickies
Just read this on the USA expats site.
Not sure if its true. Funny though.
This is a bricklayer's accident report, which was printed in the newsletter of the Australian equivalent of the Workers' Compensation board.
This is a true story. Had this bloke died, he'd have received a Darwin Award for sure.
Dear Sir,
I am writing in response to your request for additional information in Block 3 of the accident report form. I put "poor planning" as the cause of my accident. You asked for a fuller explanation and I trust the following details will be sufficient.
I am a bricklayer by trade. On the day of the accident, I was working alone on the roof of a new six storey building. When I completed my work, I found that I had some bricks left over which, when weighed later, were found to be slightly in excess of 500 lbs.
Rather than carry the bricks down by hand, I decided to lower them in a barrel by using a pulley, which was attached to the side of the building on the sixth floor.
Securing the rope at ground level, I went up to the roof, swung the barrel out and loaded the bricks into it. Then I went down and untied the rope, holding it tightly to ensure a slow descent of the bricks.
You will note in Block 11 of the accident report form that I weigh 175 lbs.
Due to my surprise at being jerked off the ground so suddenly, I forgot to let go of the rope. Needless to say, I proceeded at a rapid rate up the side of the building. In the vicinity of the third floor, I met the barrel which was now proceeding downward at an equal, impressive speed.
This explained the fractured skull, minor abrasions and the broken collar bone, as listed in Section 3 of the accident report form.
Slowed only slightly, I continued my rapid ascent, not stopping until the fingers of my right hand were two knuckles deep into the pulley. Fortunately this time I was able to hold tightly to the rope, in spite of beginning to experience a great deal of pain.
At approximately the same time, however, the barrel of bricks hit the ground and the bottom fell out of the barrel. Now devoid of the weight of the bricks, that barrel weighed approximately 50 lbs. I refer you again to my weight. As you can imagine, I began a rapid descent, down
the side of the building. In the vicinity of the third floor, I met the barrel coming up. This accounts for the two fractured ankles, broken tooth and several lacerations of my legs and lower body.
Here my luck began to change slightly. The encounter with the barrel seemed to slow me enough to lessen my injuries when I fell into the pile of bricks and fortunately, only three vertebrae were cracked. I am sorry to report, however, as I lay there on the pile of bricks, in
pain, unable to move, I must have lost my presence of mind and let go of the rope and I lay there watching the empty barrel begin its journey back down onto me. This explains the two broken legs.
I hope this answers your inquiry.
__________________
England swings like a pendelum do...
Especially after a few pints of Zider !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Not sure if its true. Funny though.
This is a bricklayer's accident report, which was printed in the newsletter of the Australian equivalent of the Workers' Compensation board.
This is a true story. Had this bloke died, he'd have received a Darwin Award for sure.
Dear Sir,
I am writing in response to your request for additional information in Block 3 of the accident report form. I put "poor planning" as the cause of my accident. You asked for a fuller explanation and I trust the following details will be sufficient.
I am a bricklayer by trade. On the day of the accident, I was working alone on the roof of a new six storey building. When I completed my work, I found that I had some bricks left over which, when weighed later, were found to be slightly in excess of 500 lbs.
Rather than carry the bricks down by hand, I decided to lower them in a barrel by using a pulley, which was attached to the side of the building on the sixth floor.
Securing the rope at ground level, I went up to the roof, swung the barrel out and loaded the bricks into it. Then I went down and untied the rope, holding it tightly to ensure a slow descent of the bricks.
You will note in Block 11 of the accident report form that I weigh 175 lbs.
Due to my surprise at being jerked off the ground so suddenly, I forgot to let go of the rope. Needless to say, I proceeded at a rapid rate up the side of the building. In the vicinity of the third floor, I met the barrel which was now proceeding downward at an equal, impressive speed.
This explained the fractured skull, minor abrasions and the broken collar bone, as listed in Section 3 of the accident report form.
Slowed only slightly, I continued my rapid ascent, not stopping until the fingers of my right hand were two knuckles deep into the pulley. Fortunately this time I was able to hold tightly to the rope, in spite of beginning to experience a great deal of pain.
At approximately the same time, however, the barrel of bricks hit the ground and the bottom fell out of the barrel. Now devoid of the weight of the bricks, that barrel weighed approximately 50 lbs. I refer you again to my weight. As you can imagine, I began a rapid descent, down
the side of the building. In the vicinity of the third floor, I met the barrel coming up. This accounts for the two fractured ankles, broken tooth and several lacerations of my legs and lower body.
Here my luck began to change slightly. The encounter with the barrel seemed to slow me enough to lessen my injuries when I fell into the pile of bricks and fortunately, only three vertebrae were cracked. I am sorry to report, however, as I lay there on the pile of bricks, in
pain, unable to move, I must have lost my presence of mind and let go of the rope and I lay there watching the empty barrel begin its journey back down onto me. This explains the two broken legs.
I hope this answers your inquiry.
__________________
England swings like a pendelum do...
Especially after a few pints of Zider !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Apr 22nd 2004, 10:18 pm
#2
BE Forum Addict
Joined: Jun 2003
Location: Sydney beachside
Posts: 3,505
Re: Attention all Brickies
Originally posted by ADELAIDE BOUND
Just read this on the USA expats site.
Not sure if its true. Funny though.
This is a bricklayer's accident report, which was printed in the newsletter of the Australian equivalent of the Workers' Compensation board.
This is a true story. Had this bloke died, he'd have received a Darwin Award for sure.
Dear Sir,
I am writing in response to your request for additional information in Block 3 of the accident report form. I put "poor planning" as the cause of my accident. You asked for a fuller explanation and I trust the following details will be sufficient.
I am a bricklayer by trade. On the day of the accident, I was working alone on the roof of a new six storey building. When I completed my work, I found that I had some bricks left over which, when weighed later, were found to be slightly in excess of 500 lbs.
Rather than carry the bricks down by hand, I decided to lower them in a barrel by using a pulley, which was attached to the side of the building on the sixth floor.
Securing the rope at ground level, I went up to the roof, swung the barrel out and loaded the bricks into it. Then I went down and untied the rope, holding it tightly to ensure a slow descent of the bricks.
You will note in Block 11 of the accident report form that I weigh 175 lbs.
Due to my surprise at being jerked off the ground so suddenly, I forgot to let go of the rope. Needless to say, I proceeded at a rapid rate up the side of the building. In the vicinity of the third floor, I met the barrel which was now proceeding downward at an equal, impressive speed.
This explained the fractured skull, minor abrasions and the broken collar bone, as listed in Section 3 of the accident report form.
Slowed only slightly, I continued my rapid ascent, not stopping until the fingers of my right hand were two knuckles deep into the pulley. Fortunately this time I was able to hold tightly to the rope, in spite of beginning to experience a great deal of pain.
At approximately the same time, however, the barrel of bricks hit the ground and the bottom fell out of the barrel. Now devoid of the weight of the bricks, that barrel weighed approximately 50 lbs. I refer you again to my weight. As you can imagine, I began a rapid descent, down
the side of the building. In the vicinity of the third floor, I met the barrel coming up. This accounts for the two fractured ankles, broken tooth and several lacerations of my legs and lower body.
Here my luck began to change slightly. The encounter with the barrel seemed to slow me enough to lessen my injuries when I fell into the pile of bricks and fortunately, only three vertebrae were cracked. I am sorry to report, however, as I lay there on the pile of bricks, in
pain, unable to move, I must have lost my presence of mind and let go of the rope and I lay there watching the empty barrel begin its journey back down onto me. This explains the two broken legs.
I hope this answers your inquiry.
__________________
England swings like a pendelum do...
Especially after a few pints of Zider !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Just read this on the USA expats site.
Not sure if its true. Funny though.
This is a bricklayer's accident report, which was printed in the newsletter of the Australian equivalent of the Workers' Compensation board.
This is a true story. Had this bloke died, he'd have received a Darwin Award for sure.
Dear Sir,
I am writing in response to your request for additional information in Block 3 of the accident report form. I put "poor planning" as the cause of my accident. You asked for a fuller explanation and I trust the following details will be sufficient.
I am a bricklayer by trade. On the day of the accident, I was working alone on the roof of a new six storey building. When I completed my work, I found that I had some bricks left over which, when weighed later, were found to be slightly in excess of 500 lbs.
Rather than carry the bricks down by hand, I decided to lower them in a barrel by using a pulley, which was attached to the side of the building on the sixth floor.
Securing the rope at ground level, I went up to the roof, swung the barrel out and loaded the bricks into it. Then I went down and untied the rope, holding it tightly to ensure a slow descent of the bricks.
You will note in Block 11 of the accident report form that I weigh 175 lbs.
Due to my surprise at being jerked off the ground so suddenly, I forgot to let go of the rope. Needless to say, I proceeded at a rapid rate up the side of the building. In the vicinity of the third floor, I met the barrel which was now proceeding downward at an equal, impressive speed.
This explained the fractured skull, minor abrasions and the broken collar bone, as listed in Section 3 of the accident report form.
Slowed only slightly, I continued my rapid ascent, not stopping until the fingers of my right hand were two knuckles deep into the pulley. Fortunately this time I was able to hold tightly to the rope, in spite of beginning to experience a great deal of pain.
At approximately the same time, however, the barrel of bricks hit the ground and the bottom fell out of the barrel. Now devoid of the weight of the bricks, that barrel weighed approximately 50 lbs. I refer you again to my weight. As you can imagine, I began a rapid descent, down
the side of the building. In the vicinity of the third floor, I met the barrel coming up. This accounts for the two fractured ankles, broken tooth and several lacerations of my legs and lower body.
Here my luck began to change slightly. The encounter with the barrel seemed to slow me enough to lessen my injuries when I fell into the pile of bricks and fortunately, only three vertebrae were cracked. I am sorry to report, however, as I lay there on the pile of bricks, in
pain, unable to move, I must have lost my presence of mind and let go of the rope and I lay there watching the empty barrel begin its journey back down onto me. This explains the two broken legs.
I hope this answers your inquiry.
__________________
England swings like a pendelum do...
Especially after a few pints of Zider !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
It's a well-known comedy monologue - made famous by Gerard Hoffnung in the 1950's. He gave a performance of it at the Oxford Union in 1958 which the BBC recorded and you can still get nowadays. Still funny though - and even funnier when someone is reading it out loud.
Apr 22nd 2004, 10:23 pm
#3
Monaco here we!!! oh no
Thread Starter
Joined: Aug 2003
Location: Bexleyheath Kent
Posts: 411
Re: Attention all Brickies
Originally posted by nickyc
Not a true story!
It's a well-known comedy monologue - made famous by Gerard Hoffnung in the 1950's. He gave a performance of it at the Oxford Union in 1958 which the BBC recorded and you can still get nowadays. Still funny though - and even funnier when someone is reading it out loud.
Not a true story!
It's a well-known comedy monologue - made famous by Gerard Hoffnung in the 1950's. He gave a performance of it at the Oxford Union in 1958 which the BBC recorded and you can still get nowadays. Still funny though - and even funnier when someone is reading it out loud.
Guessed It was untrue, that will teach me for wandering over to the dark side. Bleeding US forum.
