renth

8 Famous Cricket Sledges

1. Rod Marsh & Ian Botham: When Botham took guard in an Ashes match,
Marsh welcomed him to the wicket with the immortal words: "So how's your
wife & my kids?"

2. Robin Smith & Merv Hughes: During a 1989 Lords Test Hughes said to
Smith after he played & missed: "You can't *****ing bat". Smith replied
to Hughes after he smacked him to the boundary: "Hey Merv, we make a
fine pair. I can't *****ing bat & you can't *****ing bowl."

3. Merv Hughes & Javed Miandad: During the 1991 Adelaide Test, Javed
called Merv a fat bus conductor. A few balls latter Merv dismissed
Javed. "Tickets please", Merv called out as he ran past the departing
batsman.

4. Merv Hughes & Viv Richards: During a test match in the West Indies,
Hughes didn't say a word to Viv, but continued to stare at him after
deliveries. Eventually Viv said, "This is my island, my culture. Don't
you be staring at me. In my culture we just bowl." Merv didn't reply,
but after he dismissed him he announced to the batsman: "In my culture
we just say ***** off."

5. Ian Healy & Arjuna Ranatunga: Healy's legendary comment which was
picked up by the Channel Nine microphones when Ranatunga called for a
runner on a particularly hot night during a one dayer in Sydney... "You
don't get a runner for being an overweight, unfit, fat *****!!!"

6. Shane Warne & Daryll Cullinan: As Cullinan was on his way to the
wicket, Warne told him he had been waiting two years for another chance
to humiliate him. "Looks like you spent it eating," Cullinan retorted.

7. Glenn McGrath & Eddo Brandes: After Brandes played & missed at a
McGrath delivery, the Aussie bowler politely enquired: "Oi, Brandes, why
are you so fat?" Brandes retorted, "Cos every time I ***** your wife she
gives me a biscuit".

8. Ricky Ponting & Shaun Pollock: After going past the outside edge with
a couple of deliveries, Pollock told Ponting: "It's red, round & weighs
about 5 ounces." Unfortunately for Pollock, the next ball was hammered
out of the ground. Ponting yelled to Pollock: "you know what it looks
like, now go find it."

bondipom

Very good. I like the Warnie one. He is famous for unimaginatively calling everyone a c&*t and thats about it.

renth

You wonder if any of the cricketers laugh when they get comebacks like the ones listed in the original post. Surely it must sometimes be quite good natured. Like with Glen McGrath, he seems like a nice bloke.

Siren & Brian

Brett Lee just seems smile alot at the batsmen... but then again when you can bowl at 160kmph you dont have to have smart arse comments

Siren & Brian

Slightly different but same topic... i like the Boonie shirt that was worn over in India.... on the back was the number 52 n/o... referring to the number of beers he had on a flight home from an Ashes series.... Legend

worzel

The Zimbabwean reply to McGrath is generally accepted as the best sledge of all time. Certainly my favourite.

These sledges are an example of something that took me a few weeks Down Under to understand. How can they be so nasty during the match and then be all pally with you and say well played after the match. It happens outside of sport too where if you do something daft you will get a right old ribbing which knocks you back on your heels the first few times but while it can come across as a real insult it is actually just a jest (effectively they make Jack Dee look like Lee Evans). In the end it took meeting a Yorkshireman to make sense of it as they are very similar. I would sum it up as outwardly tough but actually very friendly underneath.

Incidentally, the cricket sledge thread reminds me that allegedly the ex-Aussie batsman David Boon holds the unofficial record for most cans of beer drank on a single flight. I forget the number but I am sure it was upwards of 50, maybe much more. Any challengers?

Siren & Brian

Hahhahaha worzel i am guessing you did not read my earlier reply?

worzel

I was probably composing it while you were posting yours (I have to try and look busy at work if someone is standing over me!). Just proves great minds think alike.

Siren & Brian

I sat here listening to him chuckle out loud a this post. It happened enough times for me to go "Whaaaaaaat?"

I like # 7 best myself


Siren

OzTennis

Not a cricket sledge but a famous Aussie one:

PM Sir Robert Menzies was addresses a pre-election rally and was being heckled continuously. During a brief, silent moment someone shouted out 'tell us all you know Bob, we've got a spare minute'. Not bad and everyone laughed but as soon as the laughing stopped 'Bob' replied 'I'll tell you what, I'll tell you all we BOTH know ... and it won't take any longer'.

Was once on a flight from Melbourne which stopped at Perth and went onto Bombay and eventually London. The Australian cricket team, going to Pakistan, was on the plane from Melbourne to Bombay. Most of them seemed intent on setting the record that 'Keg's Boon eventually broke. I'm talking the Chappell's, Marsh, Lillee, Thommo, etc, etc. Geoff Dymock was the most paralytic when the team got off in Bombay but I don't know if he drank the most. Lillee and others were on the top shelf stuff rather than cans.

They're all pretty good sledges but Brandes and Ponting are my one and two.

OzTennis