Hetts

Kia ora everyone,
Just joined. Have been living in NZ for some 15 years now and am currently in MIQ (day 5) as have been back to the UK for two months to care for my mother, who died in early June. Really struggling with coming back here this time. Never been bothered before even when my dad died 9 years ago (and I was super close to him). It's been hard selling her house and my sister lives in Germany and she is struggling too.
I don't intend doing anything just now, as need to give myself time, but being nearer to what little family I have left seems very important now especially as I'm no spring chicken myself!
Thanks for listening

BEVS

Hi there and welcome to BE.

Very very hard all round & I am very sorry your Mum has gone .
I am also in NZ and my Dad died 12 years ago now. I did the mercy flight and caring for him until he died also.

I am not sure where is the best place for you to post . Nz forum or UK forum or generally in The Lounge just for company.

Obviously being in MIQ will not be helping but perhaps Be can give you some company.

All the best
BEVS

Hetts

Thanks Bevs for the welcome and understanding. I'm not sure either where to post, but will have a think about it. Just good to know there are people out there that might understand.

dfjordan

I understand your thoughts, and my thinking is that as we get older, we have a desire to be closer to those that are left of our family. This is natural, but I think what you need to ponder over, is if for example, you were to move back to be closer to your parents etc ( in your case , your sister perhaps), what would you do once they are gone ?

Hetts

Thanks dfjordan. I think it's probably a bit deeper than just my sister, although she is important and we are such a small family as our parents were both only children and I have only my sister and our children. It's about the land of home too and being back there. I'm from Scotland originally, although have lived all over as my father was in the airforce. After mum's funeral we took her ashes and dads back home to Scotland for burial and the peace and comfort of being back after so many years was reassuring. I've still a few things to do here in NZ, but I think moving back when I'm 60 (3 years) is my thought process - so not rushing any decisions, but equally I don't want to stay here forever either - it's not home.

brits1

Hi I am very sorry to hear of your loss, I know a little of how you feel, I would say give yourself some time to come to terms with your loss and then make a decision, as you mentioned you still have some things to do in NZ , if you still feel the same way then I would "go for it" there is truly nothing like the feeling of "being home" . Good luck x

Jerseygirl

Welcome to BE.

My condolences on the loss of your mother. I think you are wise allowing yourself a few years to contemplate and arrange a move back to the UK.

Below are links to our New Zealand and UK forums that I think may be useful to you. You will find several threads in the UK forums discussing moving back home after years of living overseas. Join in a current conversation or open a new thread.

https://britishexpats.com/forum/new-zealand-83/

https://britishexpats.com/forum/moving-back-uk-61/