T5XAN

We left the US in July 06 - it was our choice after a long period of confusion and indeciciveness. It was a massive downer leaving with the gut feeling that we should probably stay. Our decisions to return to the UK were mainly based on the longer term outlook, schooling, existing UK pension scheme and all the things we missed from home. Since being home I am not adjusting well and only feel good when I scheme about returning to the US. I have returned to a respectable position with the same company but it feels like a backward step for my career and i dont enjoy anything about the job. I fell like hanging onto the original pension scheme was a false security as I am now thinking about changing jobs anyway.

I still have a chance to return to the US as my position is still vacant and L1 visa has almost 2 years left (ex boss is quite keen also). It's very tempting but everyone says give it time.

Is it just a simple case of it's to early to make a call? I dont feel like this is somewhere I want to live anymore and it's not even winter yet!
Thanks for any advice out there.

Angry White Pyjamas

Once an ex-pat always an ex-pat. Some people end up being ping-pong ex-pats.

It can take as long to settle back in your home country as it can to settle in your adopted country. For some reason we always focus on the positives of the absent country (as we do it old flames sometimes). Try to remember why it is you left the USA to return home.

If it's any consolation (which it's not of course) we are heading home in 1 months time. Our reasons are down to a decision upon which is the best place for us at this time, so we dont hate the USA. So I am sure there is going to be things we will miss, but right now we need some stability for our kids (daughter just at high school age). One of the things we intend to do is actually see more of the UK...become tourists again in our own country. Go see all the great places we never did or havent in a long time and just take in the country properly rather than fall straight back into the same old rut of work, sleep, moan. Imagine you are an American who has just moved to the UK...go see the sights and enjoy. Only you have the advantage of course of knowing how things work and having ready made friends and family around.

When we moved to the US it was a big adventure...make moving back an adventure also.


Ultimately we wont stay in the UK, we know this, and once the kid have finished schooling we have every intention of setting off on the next leg of our world tour but this time with just the two of us which should make things easier.

So, all I can say is if you genuinely think (like us) the UK is a lovely place but you want to see more, make some long term plans about moving on but in the meantime take some time to enjoy the UK and all it has to offer....I think you may ultimately be pleasantly surprised.

TouristTrap

I'll tackle just the one.

Schooling. I gather you went back because you thought the kids would have better schooling over there. Has that changed? Can they get better schooling here, in your opinion?

Another thing. If there are problems within our personal lives, they don't go away with changing countries. Changing countries just highlights them.

paddingtongreen

You don't say how the OH feels. I know of others who went back, only to find that it is a great place to visit, but not to live.

Remember though, all other things being equal, nothing is for ever.

jumping doris

How long were you in the US? And you haven't been back very long.
Give it more time.

We have been here a year now and some things we love, some we hate and of course there are things we miss about the UK. If we returned there would be things we missed about here and things we loved and hated about the UK.
We are quite lucky here because we have reasonable health insurance and fantastic schools. Back in the UK my middle daughter went to a really good school but the eldest and the youngest went to crap schools.
My youngest would have started high school this year at an awful school and here I know she will have a much better education. But we seem to be the exception for schools.
Our greatest worry is that I doubt we can retire here and we don't know whether to go back while we still can. Unfortunately my OH has a much better job here which he loves and it would be hard to find anything remotely similar in the UK. Also we would have to go were the job was and that probably wouldn't be the place we left.
Life just isn't easy is it.
I do think for some people that once you start to move around the world it gets harder to settle.
Then when all this indecision gets too much I remember one of my best friends who, two years ago, was taken ill and died four months later.
It puts it into perspective for me and I just try and enjoy every day.

If I were you.....?
I think I would give it a few more months and enjoy the UK and think again in the spring. But I'm not you.

britvic

Was you living in the US long? you've only been back for 5 minuets, all I know we know is our gut feeling tells us we are better off at home, and thats not to do with money either

Wiganer

My main worry is that I am now basically a nomad and will never be happy anywhere since I've lived in 3 different countries, and there's good and bad in all

T5XAN

We were in the US about 5-1/2 years and agree with everyones comments about it being early days. I guess I had mentally prepared myself for just dropping back into the UK and everything would be rosey. I have fast come to the realisation that once you start on this merry-go-round then its hard to not feel dizzy when you get off (if you ever get off!!). OH was much the same as me regarding our decision to stay or go and is settling better than me now that we are here.

britvic

Where are you in England?

Jerseygirl

You sound as though you have earned the title of ping pong pom....I am sure we would be exactly the same. Right from the very start I missed England but knew if we went back I would have exactly the same feelings for the US. I'm afraid its all part of the ex-pat package...you never truly feel settled again. I read that it's even harder to settle back into life in your homeland than it is to move to a new country. Life and people have moved on but your memories of home haven't.

UFsoccergator76

because America ROCKS compared to England. Seriously speaking, I think the majority of people on this forum are people who have lived in England for the majority of their lives and just were too inflexible and set in their ways to fully adapt to the American lifestyle. If you look at England objectively, you will find it to be a struggling country with a shaky future. The NHS is in a near-crisis mode, immigration problems still havent been addressed, and overcrowding in cities is a major issue. House prices are out of control and don't look to be coming down in the future. But saying that, if you have very strong ties with your family/friends who are all in England, then that counts for a lot. However, I think unless England is going to control its borders then the future for England is quite grim.

Manc

How so?

compared to say Somalia and Bangladesh, what's the basis of the remark?
No more in crisis than the US system
overcrowding? again, compared to what? Netherlands? Monaco? Sao Paulo?
House prices are high because dickheads are prepared to pay £130,000 for a terraced house in Burnley, but then again, if people are still buying them, how's it out of control?
It's grimmer if the likes of you control our borders. them Eastern Europeans that the Daily Mail likes to gripe about work like kids in a cotton mill........and if we don't let new fresh young labour into the country then there's gonna be a lot of pissed off pensioners without a pension in 20 years.

anotherlimey

This coming from the guy who left when he was 13!

Not to mention England rather than Britain.... it's all very fishy...!

Angry White Pyjamas

Ok. Thanks for the input.

Oh and dont forget the fat women...overrun with them it is

T5XAN

North England!!! Aberdeen, Scotland!