washsaint

Finally the day has arrived to move the family over -we'll get into our new home on Saturday.

It has been 3 months of hell and stress getting ready but finally there is light at the end of the tunnel....except the horrendous healthcare costs ($900 a month for wife and 2 kids) and the fact that my son broke his wrist on Tuesday!

Any hot tips for helping my wife settle in as it will be at least 90 days before her EAD comes through?

Just hope all this hassle and stress will have been worthwhile......;

MandyNi

Good luck with the move and hope you all make the journey without any further mishaps.

As to your wife settling, hmmmm I'd say invest in Skype or something similar so she can stay in touch (it's helped me in my first few weeks to hear some familiar voices), suggest you both have a look on Meetup.com and see if there are any groups that look interesting which either or both of you could get involved in, tell her to expect a real sense of frustration to hit too. It just seems to take a lot longer to achieve even day to day tasks, kind of searching for store cupboard basics which are named differently, lack of what seems like logical placing for goods in stores etc. I'm home alone most days and playing the dutiful stepford wife, but I go out walking as much as I can, plus I search for local free events which my other half and I can get out to in the evenings or weekends. You have children so that may mean you get to meet your neighbours and local parents and others a lot easier (although luckily for me I have quite a few friends in this area).

It's all new and different no matter how many times you've been here on holiday. So I guess my biggest advice is to tell her to make sure to cut herself some slack and expect the full spectrum of emotions.

scrubbedexpat097

I think she should just make the most of some down time after all the stress of moving.

Discovering new places, getting her bearings and generally orgainizing your new life here will probably keep her well occupied and busy anyway to start with. If she will be working eventually I would tell her to make the most of it all for now..

katybluewater

I moved over to Vienna, Virginia last year, and it is hard to begin with. Where will you be based? You have to be much more bolder than you may be in the UK, and start up conversations with people you meet. Slowly she will meet people. We signed our son up for soccer, and we have met a lot of people this way. I have also joined a gym as a way to get myself out of the house, as I dont work here yet - I thought it best to settle the family in before looking for a job. Be prepared for up and down days - but try and be positive and stick with it - it does get better! We try and get out exploring every weekend as well - its a very diverse state with lots to see and do. And I'd agree about Skype - its great to talk to your family in the UK. Good Luck, and enjoy the experience!

penguinsix

It can be rough at first, and it is hard to determine when the 'chaos' of the move is replaced by the 'chaos' of sitting around all day.

I would recommend getting her out of the house. First, she'll need a car, as nearly nothing is walkable here (I'm being serious--you should budget for two cars if you are driving to work, and she'll need to get her license if she doesn't have one). Second, try to find some structured activity that will get her out of the house. Something that takes place at a certain time and is a reason for her to get out, or to read a book for a book club, or to meet some people at a certain time. Giving the day some structure prevents it from becoming one long Internet/TV fest that is so easy to slip into when you are not working and in a foreign land.

I also recommend a bit of exploring. Get a map and have her hit a few places. 'Scout out' a few restaurants or parts of town that you might not see. Visit some parks or other places, or just drive around a bit to learn some back roads and short cuts.

Good luck.