hamlrt

Hello There
I have many many worries over my planned emigration , what worries did others have before the big move , after all its a life changing decision .
Thanks
John

Noorah101

My fiance didn't have any worries before coming to the USA, but he had a mild panic attack the day after he arrived. He took a nap in the afternoon and I went grocery shopping. He woke up alone, not quite realizing where he was, it had gotten dark out, and he suddenly panicked, thinking OMG what have I done? I've come to a country where I know no one except this one woman. I don't have a job. I don't have money. I don't speak English. What if this all goes very badly and I can't get along with this woman, what if I can't find work, how will I survive? But then he calmed down and went back to sleep.

Fortunately, it all worked out great...he's been here almost 7 years, his English is passable (still not fluent), he's self-employed, happily married, and became a USC last year. Life is good.

Rene

Noorah101

Are your fears in any one particular direction? Worried about the relationship? Worried about finding work? Anything specific?

Rene

Rete

John

You moved to Germany. What were your fears seven years when you emigrated there?

Sounds more like you fear the relationship then the move to a new country.

Jscl

Other than anxiousness over the practical aspects of the move, my main worry was over leaving family. I'm very close to my parents, and my dad in particular is a very anxious person, and I know he must have suffered a lot in the early years, worrying about me.

And now as they get older what happens if one of them gets ill or worse? How can I support them and be here at the same time?

If they're still young it's probably not so much of a problem but with aging parents it's my main concern.

avanutria

Do you have any brothers or sisters who live close to your parents?

My DH's parents are elderly and we did talk about this issue before we moved, but his parents know that he has to live his life for himself, not for them. His dad will never come to visit us because he doesn't have the health to sit on a long plane trip but we hope his mum will come to visit sometime.

It helps that he has two brothers, one of whom is still in their hometown and the other is working on moving to Japan, so the idea of a son moving away wasn't new.

Noorah101

I agree, the elderly parents are a tough thing to deal with. My husband didn't feel like this would be a problem for him before he came to the USA 7 years ago, but his parents have aged quite a bit during that time, and now each time he sees them back home it gets harder for him. They don't approve of him living in the USA, either, so that also makes it hard on him....but he has to live his own life...so he deals with it. But that's been one of the unexpected pitfalls for him.

Rene

hamlrt

Hello There
Thanks for the replies , interesting reading
No i dont have any worries about the relationship ....well maybe a couple lol.
My main worries are finding a good job
not having enough cash and running out
being totally out of my comfort zone
The move itself and the scary governmental types
My parents
I guess its the unknown on many levels
but really its just nerves . I worked in the U.S before for Carnival Cruises and before that my gut feeling told me it wasn't going to be good , this time my gut feeling is everything will be just fine .
Now i am not looking through rose tinted glasses , i know there will be good times and bad times and stress aplenty . But everything will work out .

Really whats not to like... a new family , a new clean start (quite liberating really) , i have many chums out there and its a chance to pursue my dreams .
The really hard thing for me personally is leaving everything behind , selling off stuff i have had for years (but its just stuff really) , its a lifechanging decision isnt it .
How did i feel about moving to Germany, well i saw it as a adventure . I came
for six weeks originally on a work contract . I liked it so much I stayed for seven years .
One thing i have missed terribly in Germany is my battle re-enacting , i just cant get back to the UK enough to go play soldiers....plenty of that across the pond though ! In fact thats how i met my fiance .
regards
john

Noorah101

It was scary for my fiance to give up his business in Turkey. He's not originally from Turkey, but he lived and worked there for 9 years before coming to the USA. He built his own business there from scratch. He turned the business over to his 2 brothers, but one was too young and inexperienced, and the other one was older but just not business smart. About 2 years after he came to the USA, his business went belly up in Turkey. He was pretty upset about that, he had hoped it to be a multinational family business....but what can you do. He got over it.

Rene

CAdreaming

Hi Hamrit- you have expressed my own worries really well!! for me my main ones are leaving friends and family and I guess leaving the familiar. If I can I will try to get back to blighty as often as possible for short visits

CAdreaming

meant to say however that for all my worries Im very excited about the move...I waited a long time to find my fiance and hes just the best! I just wish I could project myself maybe 10 months into the future and the move has somehow just happened :}