Heljpvy

Hi,

I will soon be moving to Charlotte (Well near Fort Mill, SC just south of Charlotte to be exact) on 1st Sept.

It is for my husband's job, and we have a 2 year old daughter. I'm very nervous about it all, and just wondered if any expats near the area can offer some encouragement? Our daughter will attend nursery a few days a week to match what she does here, so we luckily don't have the school system to worry about yet.

My husband's contract is 3 years and I can't imagine wanting to stay for any longer, but even that 3 years feels like a life sentence!

Helen

tom169

I'll send you a PM.

Nutmegger

Perhaps you can tell us just what your fears are, so that the good folks of the forum can address them directly. But take heart -- lots of us are happy here! (And welcome to BE.)

Heljpvy

Being homesick is the main one, a little irrational I know as it's bound to happen. Being isolated is another. Or maybe it's normal to be terrified to just have a change?!

Nutmegger

Of course it's normal to worry about a big change like the one you are facing. But I certainly don't think you are going to be isolated. For a start, you say your child will be attending a pre-school -- you're going to meet lots of other mothers there. And don't underestimate the value of being "foreign and exotic"! Americans are a friendly bunch -- and lots of them are also "from somewhere else." If you get homesick, jump on Skype and say hello to the folks back home -- though some of us feel that looking back at what was left behind is more of a hindrance than a help. It's your choice. And then, when something really ticks you off, you jump on BE and there are lots of people to gripe to who have been there, done that, got the T-shirt. If you are heading back in three years, make the most of your opportunity -- it's going to be an adventure!

Heljpvy

Thank you for those encouraging words! I'm currently packing everything up, which is a gloomy task in itself, so I'm hoping once that has been sorted I can just look forward to the adventure

Nutmegger

Think what fun it will be to unpack the old familiar things at the other end and put them around your new home! That should be a boost as you settle in.

tom169

Read pm for more detail, but overall Ft Mill is a solid area.

Rob106

Moving to another country is a tough, but it's also a great adventure. Charlotte is a great place to live, I moved here from London in 2016 and love it. Try to stay positive and be patient with yourself, there will be hard days, but you are moving to place with great weather, friendly people, low cost of living and many other attractive things. You never know, after 3 years you might not want to leave

Octang Frye

A three year sentence? Sounds like you are resentful. Some people are more adventurous and open to new experiences. Others prefer the comfort and familiarity of home. Both are fine.
If you serve the full term, you may never be able to "go home again". Because you won't fit in there. And you'll miss things from here if you do.

First thing to understand is that you're not that far from home. Five hour time difference, and six or seven hour flight. Just like taking the train or bus in the UK.
Living here has given me a whole 'nother perspective on distance. Used to be traveling 100 miles for a game of hockey was a long way. Over here, it's just across town.
We just did a road trip to pick up a puppy. 1,900 miles in a weekend and an evening. That's the length of the UK, twice. When you do go back, everything will seem smaller and crammed together.

I remember second guessing myself and having doubts when I moved here, but they disappear as soon as you're on the plane. Expect to find yourself going through a busy initial period of finding your way around, getting social security cards, utilities set up, bank accounts opened etc. You'll marvel and at some of the cool things we have over here, and you' also roll your eyes at some of the archaic ways of doing things. (It's got a lot better in the 22 years I've been here.)
You'll experiment with driving, driving round the block, making right turn after right turn. Eventually you'll experiment with the chicken lane, and start making left turns. You'll keep catching yourself "feeling" traffic coming from a certain direction, and will be jolted to reality when it comes zooming at you from the other direction.

You'll have a honeymoon period, where everything is new and fun. You'll have friends and family coming over. And probably after six months, you might get some pangs of homesickness. I'm torn on the whole British comfort food/items thing. British tea, biscuits, baked beans - all that stuff. It's a crutch for some, a reminder of "home". It can perhaps make you homesick and morose. You're in a foreign country - embrace it! Similarly, I'm torn about whether you should hang out with other British expats.
My experience was mixed. But a lot of new expats just talk about how rubbish this is, how "we do it better back home". It's natural to bond over some griping - it unifies people - if it becomes too pervasive, I found myself thinking, if you don't like it, go back to the UK.

That said, was at a party in the mountains above Boulder a couple of weeks back. Hosted by a couple, the guy travels the world getting all the international space agencies working together. She was based in France for 10 years.
Loved it. When it was time to come back, she realized she would never be "home again", so her solution was to seek out a community of French expats living in Boulder. Worked for her and I thought it was a nice solution.

Anyway, you might enjoy it here, you might not. Give it a whirl. You probably won't regret it.

Couple of other things that might make you uncomfortable at first.
Leaving money/tips on the table in a restaurant and walking away.
Having someone bag your groceries (can guarantee you'll try and do it yourself and make an awkward, confusing situation). Don't forget to pick up store loyalty cards.
Setting the trigger latch on the petrol pump and just standing around with your hands in your pockets as you do a little jig while your car is filling.
People eating (bowls of cereal), drinking, texting while driving.
Wondering what the hell all the different milk types are.
And wondering what that white scummy stuff is on the top of the bottles.
People leaving teabags in a mug, and not sufficiently getting the tea hot enough.
Ice tea. Yuck.
Expensive fruits and veggies.
Generally poor bread.
High Fructose Corn Syrup.
Drive through liquor stores, banks, chemists.
Sunshine!
Your credit card history with Visa and Mastercard from the UK means s*** here. Ditto driving history. Expect high car insurance premiums at first.
Dang, you'll never have to select a long distance/local phone provider. Or buy calling cards for 96c a minute to the UK. Then 48cents. 36. 24. 12. 8. 5.
Filing your taxes. Don't be like me, who claimed 9 Federal Exemptions, and 2 state for the first year, but then didn't change that the next year, and ended up owing a lot to the IRS.
Go rafting or canoeing on the Ocoee river. It's beautiful.

Definitely get two cars. You'll need them.

Heljpvy

Thank you for your advice

Heljpvy

Thanks for taking the time to respond to me.

I feel so much better after joining BE and realizing how much less of a big deal moving really is. Thanks again!

NYer

Ice tea (sweet/unsweetened) is part of the whole southern experience! I always go with the flow when I'm in the south. It can be absolutely delicious on a hot day - and it gets hot down there. Lemonade is big down there as well. Look for bakery bread if you think grocery store is awful; many bakeries sell very good bread: rye, sourdough, baguettes, raisin bread, Pullman's loaf. If you like Coke, buy Mexican Coke which is made with sugar. You'll probably find more RC Cola down there, though. Milk? Americans like choice - the more there is the better they like it. Better get used to that because it is not changing anytime soon.

Marblesthecat

petitefrancaise

I wouldn't move to Charlotte. Isn't that where Pulaski lives?