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-   -   How homesick are you? (https://britishexpats.com/forum/usa-57/how-homesick-you-433476/)

danfan Mar 10th 2007 5:56 am

Re: How homesick are you?
 

Originally Posted by JulianB (Post 4505109)
I think we all go through the same kind of cycle. First off you feel all gooey about the UK, the good old times, and all of that kinda stuff. Then you take a trip back home and realize how really shit it has become, and all the reasons why you left for your new adventure. Then you have to say all your goodbyes over again, and gooey somes back. Then you get back to the US, and realize it's actually pretty damn fine here. A shit day at work, big-assed bill, no bonfire night, the local store has taken branston pickle off the shelf (that was a black day indeed) etc., etc. and we go back to gooey. Round and round we go........

Might depend on your reasons for coming here/ leaving there too. I never planned to emmigrate, I loved England - just so happened, I met my husband who was American. We were both single parents & since his kids were older, we felt it would be easier on them if we lived here. Plus we could afford a house with more bedrooms here LOL

jumping doris Mar 10th 2007 8:36 am

Re: How homesick are you?
 

Originally Posted by JulianB (Post 4505109)
I think we all go through the same kind of cycle. First off you feel all gooey about the UK, the good old times, and all of that kinda stuff. Then you take a trip back home and realize how really shit it has become, and all the reasons why you left for your new adventure. Then you have to say all your goodbyes over again, and gooey somes back. Then you get back to the US, and realize it's actually pretty damn fine here. A shit day at work, big-assed bill, no bonfire night, the local store has taken branston pickle off the shelf (that was a black day indeed) etc., etc. and we go back to gooey. Round and round we go........

I agree with all of that.
Just as you think you've cracked the homesickness, something else happens. That's life.

Maz Mar 10th 2007 5:37 pm

Re: How homesick are you?
 

Originally Posted by danfan (Post 4505084)
House prices there are outrageous. Our house & property here was half the price of my old terraced there.

Too right! :eek: I wish I'd bought the 3-bed, 1-bath house I had my eye on in the Northampton outskirts for GBP30K back in 1991 when I'd thought about it...

When we looked briefly into returning to the UK (hubs was born in the US), the house prices were really the kicker! :eek: For what we could get for our 3-bed, 2-bath ranch with a lovely patio & back garden, and a lake at the back of the house... we could buy a 2-bed 1-bath flat in the middle of a block. Same distance from London as we are from Chicago. Hardly a fair swap!

(and sorry to all those who are getting homesick, for starting this thread. :( )

AdobePinon Mar 10th 2007 5:39 pm

Re: How homesick are you?
 

Originally Posted by Maz (Post 4506186)
(and sorry to all those who are getting homesick, for starting this thread. :( )

S'OK! I'm not homesick and I'm staying put until someone offers me a job in the Alps. :rofl:

Bob Mar 11th 2007 1:16 am

Re: How homesick are you?
 

Originally Posted by AdobePinon (Post 4506191)
S'OK! I'm not homesick and I'm staying put until someone offers me a job in the Alps. :rofl:

The alps are over rated anyway :D

vegas Mar 11th 2007 1:17 am

Re: How homesick are you?
 
I am here until medical costs force me back. I miss very little from England.

Texas Mom Mar 11th 2007 5:03 am

Re: How homesick are you?
 

Originally Posted by jumping doris (Post 4505420)
I agree with all of that.
Just as you think you've cracked the homesickness, something else happens. That's life.

Well said Jumping Doris. I'm a firm believer in what's for you will not go by you!
;)

TouristTrap Mar 11th 2007 5:18 pm

Re: How homesick are you?
 
The longer you're here, the more homesick you'll get - it doesn't get better, it worsens for many people.

From what I've seen.

The first six months or so are adjustment months - some hate it, some love it.

The next two years you're beginning to settle in.

Five years or so into it, you begin to take stock of your life and think about all those birthdays, anniversaries, family outings you've missed.

Eight or so years into it, you seriously start doubting your move to your new country and many start making plans to return.

bethel Mar 11th 2007 6:27 pm

Re: How homesick are you?
 
Hmm, I dunno, I think JulianB's scenario of the gooey cycle fits more for me. I've been here 12 years, and the first three years were VERY difficult. I have memories of actually doubling over with the pain of homesickness. But here I still am, and not for any family reasons or anything tying me here apart from a sense of home also being here. Now I will feel homesick wherever I am. Its mostly not the extreme that it was and it comes in fits. I feel better when I expand my idea of home and don't feel like its one place or the other. It is possible for me to catch a plane back to britain (though I don't have much money and I'm also scared of flying, but I ignore that). I think of those first pioneers who left their homes and families behind forever, and I feel lucky.

nethead Mar 11th 2007 11:52 pm

Re: How homesick are you?
 
I'm not feeling too homesick at the moment, but it varies day by day and sometimes hour by hour. I'm so thankful winter is almost over, and I am finally getting around to sorting out my drivers license. My sister is coming over in May for a couple of weeks so I have that to look forward to, although she's taking my eleven year old daughter back with her for a couple of months.

bettyboop80 Mar 12th 2007 3:42 am

Re: How homesick are you?
 

Originally Posted by TouristTrap (Post 4508817)
The longer you're here, the more homesick you'll get - it doesn't get better, it worsens for many people.

From what I've seen.

The first six months or so are adjustment months - some hate it, some love it.

The next two years you're beginning to settle in.

Five years or so into it, you begin to take stock of your life and think about all those birthdays, anniversaries, family outings you've missed.

Eight or so years into it, you seriously start doubting your move to your new country and many start making plans to return.

Agree completely...i will have been here 7 years in october and thats when we are moving back!

AvromShalom Mar 12th 2007 4:13 am

Re: How homesick are you?
 
I just arrrived back from a 10 day visit to the UK, or London to be more specific, as much as I enjoyed seeing old friends I found that my life had moved on a lot , added to which I had a load of family aggravation to deal with. Driving in London was a nightmare and to be honest whilst I had been homesick here going back for a short visit really cured me of that.

I dout I'd stay in the US forever mainly due to medical expenses but there's no way I'll ever return to the UK.

penguinsix Mar 12th 2007 4:30 am

Re: How homesick are you?
 
It's kind of true that no matter where you go that you seem to always remember (and long for) the good things back home and you tend to push aside the bad things (I mean, who longs to be stuck in London traffic?). It can build over the years, which is why it is good to get back every so often to get a taste.

I'd also second the comments about others 'moving on'. It happens--they live their lives and do things and things happen to them that you are just not a part of. You come back and it seems kind of like a new person, sometimes. I remember I went away for 3 years to get an advanced degree and do some business in Asia, and I came back and some of my friends were still in the same "day in day out" and we really had a lot less in common after my time away.

If you get a really bad case of homesickness, think about something back home that really, really pisses you off and annoys you. Anytime you long for something good, think of that bad thing and it will help ease the pain.

simongb Mar 12th 2007 1:10 pm

Re: How homesick are you?
 
I did not come here because I wanted to. I came because my ex wife is from here. The first 3 years were terrible. I would get a lump in my throat when the British Airways adverts came on the telly. There was really no internet when I came here(it was 1992) and the only connection I had with the UK was my shortwave radio. It was really a long way from Europe and the UK in those days. Now, I have the internet, BBC America (I know it's shite, but compared with what we had when I came here, it is an improvement) and SKYPE. I have a great job here, good money, settled in my work and I own my own home and my car has just been paid off. Life is good. I have lots of spare cash to play with. Good pension and good prospects. HOWEVER, I miss my family terribly and I miss the UK and Europe. I am really alone here except for my friends. I am planning to go home this summer for a year at least. When I visit the UK (which is two or three times a year) I do feel very American. I sound american now and most Brits think I am a foreigner. I went to get my hair cut at the local barber shop in Manchester over Christmas when I was there. I did not even open my mouth and the guy says to me, 'So, you just passing through? Where are you from?'. I thought, I must even look American/foreign now. That makes me sad! The UK does feel like a foreign country to me now. I may be making a mistake when I move back, but I need to try it. We'll see what happens.

Jerseygirl Mar 12th 2007 1:23 pm

Re: How homesick are you?
 

Originally Posted by simongb (Post 4511686)
I did not come here because I wanted to. I came because my ex wife is from here. The first 3 years were terrible. I would get a lump in my throat when the British Airways adverts came on the telly. There was really no internet when I came here(it was 1992) and the only connection I had with the UK was my shortwave radio. It was really a long way from Europe and the UK in those days. Now, I have the internet, BBC America (I know it's shite, but compared with what we had when I came here, it is an improvement) and SKYPE. I have a great job here, good money, settled in my work and I own my own home and my car has just been paid off. Life is good. I have lots of spare cash to play with. Good pension and good prospects. HOWEVER, I miss my family terribly and I miss the UK and Europe. I am really alone here except for my friends. I am planning to go home this summer for a year at least. When I visit the UK (which is two or three times a year) I do feel very American. I sound american now and most Brits think I am a foreigner. I went to get my hair cut at the local barber shop in Manchester over Christmas when I was there. I did not even open my mouth and the guy says to me, 'So, you just passing through? Where are you from?'. I thought, I must even look American/foreign now. That makes me sad! The UK does feel like a foreign country to me now. I may be making a mistake when I move back, but I need to try it. We'll see what happens.

Will you be a USC when you move back?


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