waxwabbit

It got me wondering........

My uncle mentioned something to me about your real close friends are pretty much made by the time you reach 20 odd, and people do not tend to make close friends after that age.....he vaguely quoted some psychologist (perhaps Freud, or something).....

Do you subscribe to this view at all?

dunroving

Not completely. I think a lot of what you experience pre-20 is "imprinted" on what you are - that includes where you lived and who you knew. So, just like your growing-up home (house, town, country) will always be a core part of us in a way that post-20 homes are not, the same can be said for our pre-20 friends.

So, I think you can make very close friends with people you meet post-20's, but they'll never be close in the same way as your childhood friends.

BrigieDarling

My best, best, best friend Tracey went to Kindergarten with my husband.... they have known each other all their lives, but I have only been really close to Tracey for about 13 years.

I have lost touch with a friend that was very dear to me when I was a teenager. I am positive that one day she'll pop up on Friends Reunited or something.

But, back to the question. I'm closer to my American friends than to anyone else. I have a v-close british friend Fiona that I met about a year ago.

NC Penguin

If it was Freud, it's more than likely bullsxxt, or in your case, rabbit sxxt. I've studied and read Freud and I believe his theories to be full of holes. The guy had problems with women for goodness sake!!

Anyway, back to your original question. One of my closest friends is my now husband and I've known him nearly six years, and I'm over 30 now.

Another of my closest friends has been my friend since my teens so that follows the theory but another of my closest friends is only I've known since '91 and it doesn't follow the theory.

So, I say to you, "stick in your pipe and smoke it"!




NC Penguin (I've never had a Freudian slip, only a Freudian slide. Apologies to Gary Larson)

Taffyles

LOL he had a problem with substances too- not too mention completely hung up on sex..still he did pave the way for others, and some of his stuff still holds although most of his theories are outdated now.

I don't think much of this particular theory- you can make close friends at any age. Has more to do with connection than years.

One of my longest close friendships has lasted since we were 4 years old (met on the first day of school and still really close friends 45 years later), so that one fits- however ALL my other really close friends, I met after the age of 20.