When you were at school (in Blighty) did you have a big event when you left?

All we had at our school was a 'Leavers Disco' - which was fun and I think, arranged by the teachers. One of the Sixth Formers was the DJ and the event was held in the Sixth Form house block. It wasn't glamourous - and we certainly didn't wear 'ball gowns' or tuxes for the guys, but we had a lot of fun.


Our son is a freshman at the local High School. We've just had a letter about the 'Senior Celebration' for the Class of 2004. The activities - all drug and alcohol free(!) - include:

Senior Breakfast at the High School

Party at Drew University on the Eve of Graduation

Post-Graduation Party. Dinner and Dancing aboard "The Atlantica" (in New York harbour).

Now, with this leaflet it says "Fundraisers and generous community donations cover the cost (approx $200) per student for all Senior Celebration activities. No student is asked to pay for any event. This year, fund-raising activities included: Stadium Blanket Sale, Parking Space Raffles, House Tour. There is also an 'invitation' to make a contribution for the kids who are graduating this Summer.

Does anyone in their school district get 'invites' to pay for the High School Prom that their kids aren't even going to? I just wondered if this is the 'norm' or if it's just our school district. I don't know why they need to have two parties for instance.

When I drop my son off at the school the kids are getting out of Range Rovers, Jaguars, Porsches, Lexus, Mercs and BMWs. I personally think it's a bit of a cheek being tapped off for a contribution - after all we might not even be living here in the States when our son gets to graduation age! I don't know why the kids and their parents can't just pay a dollar or two each week towards their own Prom.

Bah, humbug....

Englishmum, its the norm here in the Austin area, although the the fund raising didn't start until they got to Junior yr. Not everyone goes to the prom but you willl be surprised at how popular it is. My daughter went to her boyfriend's prom in 2001 and really enjoyed the experience. We enjoyed it as the only real expense we had, was the dress and a button for Byron. I don't know what expenses Bryon had apart from the limo which they shared with 3 other couples and the tickets but it put them (his parents) back a pretty penny. Elisabeth, decided to forgo her prom, as she had graduated early, ( in Dec 2002) and Byron is still her boyfriend, so it seemed quite pointless. As she knew in advance that she wouldn't be attending the prom, we felt no obligation to take part in the fund raising activities.

The other bit thing over here though, is the actual graduation. You have to hire a gown and cap for the day. Usually a huge hall is hired for the occaison, for Pflugerville like all the high schools here, it was the Frank Irwin Centre in Austin, a huge concert hall. We naively thought that being a big hall we would have plenty of choice of seats. Boy, were we wrong! I think we were the only family, that didn't have the whole neigherhood, cheering on their offspring. It didn't matter if they barely scraped by to get their diploma or that many of them were fast approaching 21, the fact they had managed to get through high school, was achievement enough. Then there are the pictures for the year book which all seniors have to have in and the parties afterwards, the class ring, the invites, be warned its a whole industry over here.

I hate to think what its going to be like when Elisabeth graduates from Uni. No doubt we will get a taste of that when she is inducted into the Phi Eta Sigma National Honors Society in April which is again being held in a huge ballroom. She was in 2 minds about joining this but everything counts on your CV over here.

My school had a fundraiser too, but I don't think they invited anyone to contribute. Any that wasn't covered by the fundraiser, the kids who were going had to pay. I didn't want to pay for the ticket and a dress so I didn't go If your kids don't want to go anyway or are too young then don't worry about it!

When we left school we made our own amusement. We went to the pub and then came back to the sixth form centre where we had a massive water fight. It was a good thing that it was our last day otherwise I don't think we would have been asked to leave quite as politely as we were!

Only water? Mine involved flour and eggs too

LMAO - Yes I recall sitting in a bath full of 'cake mix' after our leaving bash - trying to get the damn stuff out of my hair LOL. It really was a 'bash' with flour and eggs too! My tatty curled up photographs in the bottom of an old M&S biscuit tin show my class mates of the 80's in our school uniform shirts covered in biro scrawl saying 'good luck', 'miss you' and nick names you'd rather not recall! It's really not comparable to the professional portraits proudly on display in dining rooms all over the USA of young Americans in elegant cocktail dresses and Tux's under an arch of pastel balloons! We did have a lot of innocent fun though

I do love the idea of graduation - I think the US have got it right. The UK would do well to adopt a similar acknowledgement of our childrens efforts when they finish their schooling. It would give them something to focus on - something to work towards and something to feel proud of when they finally achieve their goals.

I went to my wifes prom when she graduated

to be honest, I dont remember much of it, and i wasnt even drinking????

strange!

It was a bit of a blur, but then again that was my first trip seeing her, and i was probably a bit ga-ga.......

Say that when you see the bills coming in- jeeze! It's a cattle market actually- those photos are taken so damn quickly and costa a lot. The whole thing costs a lot. There's hire of the tux $120 or buy a dress at the very least $100 (my daughters was about $180), the class ring $300 approx, professional photos (not in cap and gown) for year book, year book, limo hire for party, party itself, cap and gown (over $100) honours tassle and stole $50 extra. Dinner hosted by parents $$$$ and so on. All for just completing high school- bleeding ridiculous. And yes when you get those high school graduate announcement cards in the mail- you are expected to give a nice gift to the sender (preferably money). We didn't send any out when our kids graduated- thought it was a bit of a cheek really- the people who wanted to give them something did.

We seemed to have more fun without all the expensive rigmarole- throwing our school hats in the river on the last day and time honoured traditions - like a hockey match against the boys etc . And ah yes the flour and eggs

Why do these kids need a limo?

Where would they go in one? We live in suburbia for goodness sakes!

Taffyles, I did not say I love the idea of prom$ - although when it's time for our son's, if he's excited and wants to take part in the tradition - we'll be very happy to help him make it something to remember.... now if I had lot's of children all in their teens, maybe I would feel different
Indeed! I do agree with you - your prom inventory was scary - it is for the most part, another excuse to cash in/cough up.

I did say on my original post that I DO love the idea of Graduation. The acknowledgement of a childs efforts to come out at the top is an encouraging thing don't you think?
I'm perfectly happy with my last day of school memories but if there had been an opportunity to have my hard work recognised too, I'm sure I would have felt proud to do so - even if it was in a Harry Potter Robe!
As for graduation invitations/money requests - I never knew such things existed and I would not send any out to anyone - How rude?! Perhaps these families should be introduced to the British tradition of flour and eggs

How things have changed..when we went to school it was your duty to become educated...not to be rewarded!

As hubby says breathing here, gets one a medal!

I think the whole prom/graduation idea is great fun.
But they are taking the piss here in Tallahassee.
My 5 year old son has to go through this whole graduation thing upon leaving daycare!! Talk about over the top. But I know this is just the start, next thing i know he will be graduating from some law school I hope...

It's the same here Expo- graduation from daycare, kindergarten. And they "graduate" in style from elementary school - with a barrowful of certificates- everybody's a winner mentality pervades. Failing all else there's certificates for blowing your nose and ability to write your own name. There's a big Graduation ceremony from Middle School with the young girls is ballgowns..puhlease- the whole thing is way OTT.