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Family Visits

Family Visits

Old Jul 6th 2005, 3:39 pm
  #1  
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Default Family Visits

I've just had my big brother over for a long weekend. We had a fantastic time and it got me thinking....

I miss my family a lot and as we all lived near to each other, we'd pop in and out and see each other on a regular basis. But... and there's always a but, I've found that living out here and not seeing them as often, I actually spend more quality time with them and have probably got to know them far better. I found out things about my brother this weekend, that I probably wouldn't have if I was still in London and seeing him all the time.

Anyone else find that quality but infrequent visits has the edge over being there and seeing them all the time?
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Old Jul 6th 2005, 4:41 pm
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Default Re: Family Visits

Originally Posted by sibsie
I've just had my big brother over for a long weekend. We had a fantastic time and it got me thinking....

I miss my family a lot and as we all lived near to each other, we'd pop in and out and see each other on a regular basis. But... and there's always a but, I've found that living out here and not seeing them as often, I actually spend more quality time with them and have probably got to know them far better. I found out things about my brother this weekend, that I probably wouldn't have if I was still in London and seeing him all the time.

Anyone else find that quality but infrequent visits has the edge over being there and seeing them all the time?
Yes, I think you are right. My brother and his wife are out for 5 weeks and I'm sure it'll be the same as other trips I've made home or he's made to visit me - but (well, you did say there's always a but) at the end of the visit it's much harder to walk away, unlike when you know you can just pop round because you live in the same town or country.
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Old Jul 6th 2005, 5:44 pm
  #3  
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Default Re: Family Visits

Blimey 5 weeks! I'm not sure I could do that long. :scared: I can only have family over June to Oct. Being in MIL's basement means that once the boat is back in winter dry dock we haven't got anywhere for them to stay.
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Old Jul 6th 2005, 5:54 pm
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Default Re: Family Visits

I agree. My Mum came out for my wedding back in 2003 and we then took her to Vegas, San Francisco, the Canyon as well as local places in the two weeks that she was here. I hadn't spent that much time with one of my parents since I was in my early teens.
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Old Jul 6th 2005, 6:31 pm
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Default Re: Family Visits

Originally Posted by Pimpbot
I agree. My Mum came out for my wedding back in 2003 and we then took her to Vegas, San Francisco, the Canyon as well as local places in the two weeks that she was here. I hadn't spent that much time with one of my parents since I was in my early teens.

Same for me - my mum was here for 3 weeks last year and we did San Francisco etc - most time we have spent together since I was 18, same with my sis and family who where here last month - felt I actually got to know her kids a lot better.
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Old Jul 6th 2005, 11:11 pm
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Default Re: Family Visits

Since moving out here, my Mum has worked out how to use her computer, installed Yahoo messenger and I speak to her on that almost daily. When I was in the UK, maybe every other week I'd pick up the phone, and that would be it!
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Old Jul 6th 2005, 11:15 pm
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Default Re: Family Visits

Originally Posted by Eskimo
Same for me - my mum was here for 3 weeks last year and we did San Francisco etc - most time we have spent together since I was 18, same with my sis and family who where here last month - felt I actually got to know her kids a lot better.

Snap! My mother, sister and nephew came over for a visit for the whole month of March. It was the most time I have spent with my sister since we were kids and my nephew since he was born. The only down side was that it was harder to say goodbye after having them here for an extended period.
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Old Jul 6th 2005, 11:37 pm
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Default Re: Family Visits

I get on much better with my sister now that I never have to see her

The odd email and that's enough, back home, she would only ever want me to go fix her puter or somin'...the pay off was usually a bucket load of free software or movies, so I'd know something was up *lol*
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Old Jul 7th 2005, 1:13 am
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Default Re: Family Visits

Same here. Most of my firends migrated south from Yorkshire to the South East when we left home. Their mums still see mine quite regularly (small town) and pass the "it must be hard having him so far away" sort of comments. She shuts them up by comparing how often they see their kids who now live in London/Surrey/Kent wherever with how often she sees me. They see theirs one or two weekends a year, and maybe at Christmas. I see mine at least twice a year, normally a couple of weeks at a time, and every other Christmas.

We're a pretty close family, which may explain some of it, but I think when the folks are a 4 or 5 hour drive away, its easy to think "oh i'll pop up next month to see them" and the months just slip by. When theyre a couple of flights away, it takes a bit more organization/discipline, so it happens. Whatever it is, my mum isn't complaining too much, although she'd still like us closer - see if she still thinks that by Christmas - we're going over next week for 4 or 5 months!!
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Old Jul 7th 2005, 1:31 am
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Default Re: Family Visits

Originally Posted by Yorkieabroad
we're going over next week for 4 or 5 months!!
You lucky bugger. How have you swung that one?
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Old Jul 7th 2005, 1:38 am
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Default Re: Family Visits

Originally Posted by sibsie
You lucky bugger. How have you swung that one?
Long story, but basically, bought a new house ready in november (or more likely december), and leased out our current one starting on the 16th July! we hadn't expected it to move so quickly, but not complaining. So a busy couple of weeks getting things packed and ready to go - not easy with 2 toddlers snapping round my ankles and a 5 week old wailing inthe corner!!

We were going to go to Beijing for a few months (wife to work, me to go to Uni) but my sister offered us her house for the rest of the year and we jumped at it -its about half a mile from my Mum, and 1.5 miles frommy other sister. Family are over the moon, kids are excited, wife (USC) is nervous and I've got to admit I'm a little nervous too - not lived there for over 10 years, but always said I wanted to go back - this trip could either kill that notion totally, or else make me even more unsettled than I am here!! But I recognise that i am very lucky to get the chance to try it out without cutting the ties here.
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Old Jul 7th 2005, 1:38 am
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Default Re: Family Visits

Originally Posted by sibsie
I've just had my big brother over for a long weekend. We had a fantastic time and it got me thinking....

I miss my family a lot and as we all lived near to each other, we'd pop in and out and see each other on a regular basis. But... and there's always a but, I've found that living out here and not seeing them as often, I actually spend more quality time with them and have probably got to know them far better. I found out things about my brother this weekend, that I probably wouldn't have if I was still in London and seeing him all the time.

Anyone else find that quality but infrequent visits has the edge over being there and seeing them all the time?
Yep, know what you mean, my dad came over to the States for the first time in April this year, he's 81, mum died last year. He liked it so much he's coming back in August, it seems to have spread his wings a bit and the time I spend with him, is more 'quality time' than I would otherwise have with him over there, He's a game old guy, showed him all the sites in Philly, and as we only had a short time in Atlantic City last time ,we're going to take him back as he loves the Gee Gees and the slots.........
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Old Jul 7th 2005, 1:49 am
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Default Re: Family Visits

My mum has been over 5(!) times in the nearly 2 years that we have been here. She misses my children terribly and it eases my guilt if she can come over and see them.
The problem is that the goodbyes never get any easier at the airport and it makes me feel very unsettled for a week or so after. Bit of a problem when she is coming over that often!
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Old Jul 7th 2005, 1:59 am
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Default Re: Family Visits

Originally Posted by Yorkieabroad
But I recognise that i am very lucky to get the chance to try it out without cutting the ties here.
I'm dead jealous. I couldn't get Mr Sibsie out of New England with a rocket up his arse, let alone out of the US for any length of time. Hope you have an amazing trip back home.
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Old Jul 7th 2005, 2:28 am
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Default Re: Family Visits

Originally Posted by sibsie
I'm dead jealous. I couldn't get Mr Sibsie out of New England with a rocket up his arse, let alone out of the US for any length of time. Hope you have an amazing trip back home.
Thanks - I hope to!!

And as for New England/Rockets/anatomy....if I were in New England I think I'd be the same as your husband!
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