clarissageo

So now the visa's have finally approved, the nerves and worries about the big move are kicking in, especially about the kids

When we went over for 3 months (ok, 87 days) between June and September to sort the house etc out, we paid a visit to the local elementary school and met the principle to discuss my UKC boys.

They had completed year 5 at their school in England, and were both 11 in October, so they would have been in Year 6 in England if we were staying here.

Twin 1 - very bright, mature, fairly outgoing once he gets to know people
Twin 2 - Has LD, an IEP from his english school. Pretty immature, very sensitive

As you can see - total opposites.

Now, when we went to see the principle at the local elementary school, she set us up with an online system called Study Island so the boys could study at home whilst we were in the UK waiting for the Visas. We didnt want to confuse them by sending them back to the English school after they had already said their goodbyes, and learning to put U's in everything, so we have been home schooling them whilst we have been there. They were given Year 5 work to complete.

Twin 1 has steamed through it, passed everything first time, with grades A's and B's.

Twin 2 has struggled with alot of it, but has put in vast amounts of effort.

Now we're worried, that when we enroll them in the school in the US, that they will fail grade 5 because they will have only been there half the school year, regardless of what grades they get. We're concerned that Twin 1 will get excellent grades, but end up being held back because of attendance.

What do you guys think - is it worth us putting them straight in middle school, knowing that they could have to repeat the grade because they have only been there half a year, rather than end up having them repeat grade 5 again next year, which will make them around 2 years older than the rest of their classmates?

We've discussed it with them and they can see the pro's and con's of going to either school, they are not too keen on still being in elementary school when they are 12 going on 13 though.

They are both worried about the usual things - being different, being considered dumb because they are behind, making friends etc.

As far as passing the grades go, I know that twin 2 will end up with an IEP regardless of what grade he goes into, and possibly twin 1 will struggle a little with grade 6 work, but if he goes into grade 5, there is a chance it will be too easy for him and he will end up acting up because he gets bored so easily.

oh..... and we really don't want to split them and have one at middle and one at elementary

Any ideas / opinions?

lisa67

Oh what a dilemma....I can only speak of my experiences. To cut a long story short I have daughter whi has just turned 12 and is in 7th grade and a son who has just turned 14 and is in 9th grade. Both of them are the youngest in their year but have always fitted in and coped well both academicaly and socially. My son is very mature for his age and a bright, but lazy student! My daughter is less mature and although she's fine in her grade if we had our time again I might have put her in a grade below.
I think if I was in your situation I would aim to put them in the higher grade (MS rather than elementary) and see how they cope as long as you explain (which you seem to have done) that if they're not comfortable they can stay in that grade for an extra year.

rebs

Definitely a dilemma!

My son is the same age as your twins - he was 11 in November, so he had also completed year 5 in England when we moved over in July and he started in 5th Grade in elementary school in August.

He's doing well- his grades are good - although one or two topics are coming round that he has done before in year 5 in England, and he got caught out a bit with a test on the 50 states and capitals!, but generally he's doing fine.

I think this year is better for him to 'settle' in as one of the oldest in the school (even if there is some duplication with topics), where they are starting to prepare them all for the move to middle school - I think it would just have been too much at the time of the move to add into the mix being amongst the youngest in a school.

Have you been in touch with the school regarding how they will view the attendance? They may be able to take into account the home school work that your twins have done in the meantime? Maybe they will be able to pass 5th grade along with their peer group?

Best of luck to you with whatever you decide is best.

lisa67

I agree about the transition to middle school, especially if the MS is much larger than the elementary..it can be a big adjustment. Whatever you decide remember that kids are far more resilient than we give them credit for and you're bound to be more concerned about this than they are ! It's tough but you can only do your best

Janek66

I am with Lisa and would put them striaght in to middle school. I think it important they stay with their age group. The bright one will figure it out, the other will go on an IEP anyway and will be given time and guidance so that he can stay in grade.
I have two girls that both started middle school this year, one is the oldest in her grade (step daughter), extremely bright but socially challenged (thinks she is right so argues with teachers all the time, the other is the youngest in her grade and just made honour roll for the first time.

clarissageo

We've not spoken to the school yet about how the attendance will affect them, so I may well be worrying about this for no reason! But that said, now the visas have been approved I need something to worry about!

I was in the frame of mind to use grade 5 as a settling in period, until DH bought up the attendance issue, but then the other part of me wants to put them into 6th, and let them sink or swim! I've already explained to them the options that we have for them, and I think alot of it is that they have got this idea into their head that middle school is a big scary place.... goodness knows why because they've never really been told anything about it!

thanks for all the responses...... I hate the thought of them being in elementary so late, I'd rather them go with their peers..... I'm hoping the school, whichever we chose will have some kind of integration program to get them used to things!

lisa67

Wouldn't set your hopes too high for the intergration program...very unlikely unless you're going to a private school. Some schools buddy the new kids up with other kids.But if they go into MS then a lot of the kids won't know each other and as my kids found out a lot of kids moved into the school after we did and they weren't the new kids for very long!
The accent thing will go in their favour! Both other kids and teachers love it.
There's pros and cons to both choices...just go with your gut!

rebs

I'm sure they'll settle in fine - whatever route you choose.

Where we live, 5th Grade IS the peer group for our son's age - and like Lisa said, the middle schools here are huge! The move from elementary to middle seems to be akin to the move we made as kids from primary to secondary - and I can certainly remember worrying about that when I was a kid (although it was never as bad in reality as we had worried about in advance).

rebs

Very true - they're ahead of the game already simply by the fact that there are two of them going into the new school.

Jerseygirl

I think you're worrying too much. My daughter was 11 when we moved here and went into Grade 6. AFAIK there was no integration program...she just got on with it. OK some things were new/strange ie American history, no geography...but she adjusted well. Kids are very adaptable...it's the parents who have the difficulty. Good luck.

Edit: One thing I did was to 'play up' her new school...telling her how exciting it would be making new friends...learning new things etc.

Duncan Roberts

Study Island has some fantastically funny things on it! I'm loosely in the education field and there are some very knowledgeable state and local requirements experts at the company, especially for Ohio since that's where we're based. Here is what one had to say.

"No, I don't think that they would be held back. They should supply the district with previous school records and the district will put them in the appropriate grade. The schools usually perform some diagnostic testing that would determine a child's abilities, along with teacher feedback. If they are performing at grade level, they will keep them in that grade or accelerate them as necessary. The attendance policy is decided by the school district."

If you have any specific questions send them to me in a PM and I can probably find an expert who will know the answer. Good luck with the IEP too, Ohio is psycho in terms of what has to be done for that. I'm on the periphery of a group designing a software feature to track IEP and there is just so much junk that has to be done to get a kid on the track to get an IEP, to be approved for one and then monitoring it over time. I believe it is the most cumbersome IEP out of all the states.

MsElui

my dilema is slightly different. my son is only 4 but if we were back in blighty he would be in infant school now. Here we put him in pre school (just 3 mornings a week) as he isnt really eligible until next school year to start Kindergarten. However the pre school teacher is telling us he is one of the youngest she has (some are a year older) and he has trouble concentrating on set subjects for the needed time and is quite immature (not a surprise!). She seems to be recomending that we maybe hold him back and start 2010 instead of 2009. I can see the logic in it but part of me think he will then be 2 years behind his english peers and if we do go back for any reason when the visa expires in 2010 (ie we dont get a renewal or a GC or DH is made redundant etc )then he wont have actually been to any proper school at all and will find going into a third year (not sure of correct english term for that year) of peers quite tough. We dont have to decide now (can even apply and leave it til the day school starts) but its weighing on my mind a lot.

clarissageo

Thanks for that Duncan

Janek66

Our son turns 4 in 9 days. He isn't elligible to start kindergarten next year, it will be 2010. However our son is extremely bright, started reading in May, and is ahead of all his peers. It is very frustrating to us that WV won't allow him to test to see if he can start in 2009.

penguinsix

By the way, the School District you are moving to, do they have a middle school or are grades 5 and 6 part of the elementary program? Some districts do not break them apart separately, some do.