Dollars for wedding presents!
 

Hi guys,

My fiance and I are getting married at the end of August in Devon before we move to The USA in September....

Obviously we can't have lots of wedding presents and extra clutter to bring with us so we're thinking of asking for money if anyone would like to give us something....

Can anyone think of a way to do this in Dollars from the UK when we don't yet have a US bank account?

Or should we just stick with Sterling?
Ta
Richard

Re: Dollars for wedding presents!
 

Since you've just horrified the good Brits on the forum catatonic, the token American will have to step up. :) (Quick note: She's your fiancée, unless you plan to be a test case for gay marriage in Immigration, Richard.)

It's déclassé to ask for money in lieu of gifts, at least on the wedding invitation. Though I understand. Ask the bride to tell her mother and maid of honor, and let them spread the word. It's definitely dreadful manners to dictate what form of currency the gifts should be in. We do have currency exchange services over here in the colonies, as well. :)

Re: Dollars for wedding presents!
 

Haha well I hate to be the one to inform you what a vulgar place the UK has become but asking for contributions to help fund a new life together, often by way of an amusing ditty or sentimental poem instead of picking from a wedding list of novelty pepper grinders and toasters from John Lewis' is pretty much de rigueur nowadays! Terrible isn't it....

Re: Dollars for wedding presents!
 

haha, very well :) Emily Post was an American. Feel free to give her the good old two-fingered salute. :thumbup:

Re: Dollars for wedding presents!
 

Whatever way you ask can't exactly be tactful, just sayin.....;):D

However, if you succeed, why not just accept sterling? It's easy enough to put it in your UK bank and do a transfer once you've set up your US bank. Or have a relative send it to you by wire.

Re: Dollars for wedding presents!
 

Very bad manners to ask for money, even worse if it's put in a silly poem inside the invites.
Why not just say, no gifts needed due to the move and enjoy your last big get together with friends instead of asking for money. I bet most will still put some cash in a card.

Re: Dollars for wedding presents!
 

finace/fiancee is obviously not a word that is top of my vocabulary list. This is news to me. I can't wait to pick up on it in others now.

Re: Dollars for wedding presents!
 

That sounds a lot nicer than asking and expecting money or gifts.

Re: Dollars for wedding presents!
 

Terrible bad manners blah blah blah, the last 2 weddings I have been invited to (in the UK) cash has been requested. Both brides and grooms were already living together so didn't need/want crystal decanters and a dozen toasters so they included a little tongue in cheek poem with their invitation along the lines of we don't want anything other than the pleasure of your company but if you really feel the need some cash towards our homeymoon (couple #1) or new house (couple #2) would be apprecitaed. You could do the same but substitute $$ for your new life abroad.

I for one appreciated not having to shop for something that was unwanted and just wrote a cheque :)

Re: Dollars for wedding presents!
 

Although I do think it is terribly bad manners to ask for money...it seems to be more and more common these days...especially as most couples have already established a home together. My daughter has been to several weddings over the last few summers and almost every one of them have asked for money. One even asked for money towards a mini-moon rather than bridal shower gifts.

Re: Dollars for wedding presents!
 

I'd say it's acceptable in a case like this where the couple are emigrating and don't want to have to move lots of physical goods.

Perhaps a compromise would be to ask for gift cards for household goods stores to be sent to an address (relatives?) in the US. Before we moved over I'd sometimes send my brother in San Francisco a Williams-Sonoma gift card ordered online from the UK for birthdays or Christmas.

Re: Dollars for wedding presents!
 

I bought my mother-in-law a gift card for Christmas while she was staying in the US with my sister-in-law. Quite a few major stores would not accept a UK credit/debit card to pay for a US gift card. Also be careful with companies like amazon - gift cards bought from amazon.co.uk cannot be redeemed on amazon.com and vice versa.

Re: Dollars for wedding presents!
 

Gift Cards would be doable if you know the type of things you will need when you get here and the stores you might want to shop in.

Re: Dollars for wedding presents!
 

When my daughter got married US stores would not accept a UK credit card for online purchases. 2 people had their cards stopped by the UK CC company as they thought they were being fraudulently used.

Re: Dollars for wedding presents!
 

That's why I told them to tell the bride's mother and maid of honor to get the word out that they can use money rather than gifts. That is tactful; they can say, "You know, since you asked what they'd like, I can tell you what would do them the most good...".

Re: Dollars for wedding presents!
 

Agree ...... manners dictate you don't put info about a registry/gifts etc in the invitation, but guests will ask mum, dad, bridesmaids, what is being done with regards gifts, and that's when they say "well they will be moving to the US immediately after the wedding, so actually cash gifts would be the most suitable"

Re: Dollars for wedding presents!
 

Yeah you would have to check it out. My parents in law gave us Bed Bath & Beyond vouchers for Christmas so they must work :)

Re: Dollars for wedding presents!
 

If the store ships to the UK, they must accept UK credit cards. The bank that issues the cards might feel a bit funny about it, though.

Re: Dollars for wedding presents!
 

Why not just have a Money Dance?

Re: Dollars for wedding presents!
 

Hey, we got married shortly before our move over here. We didn't put anything in the invite as we felt that was bad manners but we asked both sets of parents to spread the word that cash/gift vouchers would be most suitable given our situation. Just about everyone did this apart from those who wanted to give us special gifts which are in storage at my Mums house - these are timeless pieces. We were happy to get gift cards since we used these to buy our new luggage etc, I also ended up actually selling some unused ones to my Mum. I wouldn't specify currency, no doubt since you are moving anyway you will have to do some kind of money transfer.

Re: Dollars for wedding presents!
 

Cash is king! gift cards require you to shop at their store.

American wedding gifts have always been money as the primary gift. And I seem to notice that UK follows the US culture like a lapdog these days.

Re: Dollars for wedding presents!
 

We were living in Germany, but got married in the UK, we knew we were going to be stationed elsewhere pretty soon after the Wedding (possibly the USA) and had pretty much all the dishes/glasses etc that we needed. This was 26 years ago (next month) and we didn't feel we were being disrespectful to let guests know that we would appreciate monetary gifts as opposed to anything else.

The only people that got upset by our request, were the US side of the family, they didn't come to the Wedding and didn't even send a card, but that's a different story!:ohmy:

Re: Dollars for wedding presents!
 

Thank you people, some good points for things to watch out for and interesting to see how etiquette has changed over the past two hundred years or so!

These days, I'd suggest it's quite bad manners to criticise and belittle another's wedding plans and pick at the grammar of a person asking a simple, friendly question. Maybe I'm more European than I realise (or realiZe...whichever will provoke the least abuse here), maybe I just don't have enough free time on my hands to take offence at the choices other people make in life and feel obliged to voice my outrage.

Re: Dollars for wedding presents!
 

Thank you for expressing your concerns.

Re: Dollars for wedding presents!
 

No it hasn't. It's only the last 20 or 30 years that people have primarily given cash.

Re: Dollars for wedding presents!
 

Really? When did that happen and I didn't notice?