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Does everyone get some level of cold feet?

Does everyone get some level of cold feet?

Old Mar 5th 2018, 9:02 pm
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Default Does everyone get some level of cold feet?

Hi All,

So i wrote a long post but everyone's situation is so unique thought it would be better to come right out and ask.
Moving to NY in a couple of weeks but is it normal to get cold feet when all the obstacles are out of the way and you have a date set?

I thought I'd be nothing but excited but now the reality is all setting in and i'm really questioning my decision

I think what I'm looking for is someone to tell me it's normal and I won't find a single person who's recently moved and regretted it even if they were beginning to reassess.

Cheers
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Old Mar 5th 2018, 9:08 pm
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Default Re: Does everyone get some level of cold feet?

Originally Posted by FrankCastle View Post
Hi All,

So i wrote a long post but everyone's situation is so unique thought it would be better to come right out and ask.
Moving to NY in a couple of weeks but is it normal to get cold feet when all the obstacles are out of the way and you have a date set?

I thought I'd be nothing but excited but now the reality is all setting in and i'm really questioning my decision

I think what I'm looking for is someone to tell me it's normal and I won't find a single person who's recently moved and regretted it even if they were beginning to reassess.

Cheers
I think it very much depends on why you are moving. I moved to be with a "special someone" and was so focused on that, it never crossed my mind to think twice! If I had been already well established in the UK, with a home rather than a rental, a good job, a good income, and a good life, then yes, I would have been wondering, "What the heck am I doing this for???"
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Old Mar 5th 2018, 9:25 pm
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Default Re: Does everyone get some level of cold feet?

I don't know about "cold feet", but things got seriously weird in the last week or so - as we left our jobs, packed up and saw all our worldly possessions taken away by the movers, and said goodbye to friends and family. The last 48 hours or so I felt like a zombie - I felt like I was living in a film, detached from reality.

The feeling reached a zenith when I was in the airport, waiting to leave. Once we had checked our bags, and boarded the plane, I collapsed into the seat, exhausted, but excited about the next step of my life.

I was immigrating on a CR-1, with my wife, who had been living in London since we got married.

Last edited by Pulaski; Mar 5th 2018 at 9:55 pm.
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Old Mar 5th 2018, 9:36 pm
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Default Re: Does everyone get some level of cold feet?

Sometimes I have moments of reflection as I drive by myself on the US highways. Along the lines of "I actually live here...."
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Old Mar 5th 2018, 9:40 pm
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Default Re: Does everyone get some level of cold feet?

Originally Posted by tom169 View Post
Sometimes I have moments of reflection as I drive by myself on the US highways. Along the lines of "I actually live here...."
Yeah, I still get those occasionally, though not as often as I used to. I think I would put some of my feelings down to my move being a one-way move.

Last edited by Pulaski; Mar 5th 2018 at 9:42 pm.
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Old Mar 5th 2018, 9:42 pm
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Default Re: Does everyone get some level of cold feet?

Originally Posted by Pulaski View Post
Yeah, I still get those occasionally, though not as often as I used to. I think I would put some of the feelings down to my move being a one-way move.
It's swiftly interrupted by a Florida driver cutting me up
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Old Mar 5th 2018, 9:52 pm
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Default Re: Does everyone get some level of cold feet?

Absolutely. We booked the flight to Atlanta in Upper Class to make a big thing of it, which helped once at the airport, but the two or three days before were very odd, especially when the house essentially got packed up and left before us. Don't worry, that feeling will be gone within a day of arrival - then it will shift to a floundering period where you try and get your bearings. I found it fun, still do as we are only 18 moths into our journey. Given the amount you get for your $ where I am compared to the M4 corridor, I still find myself looking around the house wondering when the bizarre holiday will end.
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Old Mar 5th 2018, 9:57 pm
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Default Re: Does everyone get some level of cold feet?

Originally Posted by robtuck View Post
I still find myself looking around the house wondering when the bizarre holiday will end.
When you realize how much it costs to maintain these palaces built of sticks, OSB, plasterboard, and roofing felt.
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Old Mar 5th 2018, 10:53 pm
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Default Re: Does everyone get some level of cold feet?

If someone were to tell you right now that you couldn’t go to New York I’m sure you would be very disappointed. Yes I think it’s perfectly normal to feel the way you are feeling. I’m going through something similar going in the opposite direction. After 33 years here I have moments of being overwhelmed at our return this summer to Scotland. Such is life! Best wishes.
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Old Mar 5th 2018, 11:10 pm
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Default Re: Does everyone get some level of cold feet?

I think it's perfectly normal to feel reservations and to second guess yourself.
It happened to me when I moved to Atlanta, Georgia. Then Colorado. You just go with it.
You'll be fine. You'll have a honeymoon period when everything is new and exciting. And friends will visit and you'll love it. Then you'll get a bit homesick. And then get over it.
Shit, being in NY is practically Cornwall. You can skip across the pond like riding a No 17 bus to go into town to pick-up sausages at Bob the Butcher's and then getting a pot of tea at Mrs Ackermans.

Oh, a bit of advice for you from personal experience. My company paid for a tax attorney (in New York) to do my taxes the first year. I was eligible to claim something like 9 federal exemptions, and 2 state exemptions that first year. What I didn't know was that the second year, I should have dialed that back to 1 and 0, so owed extra tax and a penalty. Make sure this isn't you.

Oh, and everyone does coke here. Especially Chicago and New York.

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Old Mar 5th 2018, 11:16 pm
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Default Re: Does everyone get some level of cold feet?

Hell yes!!!

I remember sitting on the plane thinking “what have we done?”
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Old Mar 5th 2018, 11:16 pm
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Default Re: Does everyone get some level of cold feet?

Originally Posted by Caroline in Arizona View Post
If someone were to tell you right now that you couldn’t go to New York I’m sure you would be very disappointed. Yes I think it’s perfectly normal to feel the way you are feeling. I’m going through something similar going in the opposite direction. After 33 years here I have moments of being overwhelmed at our return this summer to Scotland. Such is life! Best wishes.


That's a great way to think about it, Caroline of Clan Arizonia.
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Old Mar 5th 2018, 11:26 pm
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Default Re: Does everyone get some level of cold feet?

I didn't, but mainly because I was looking after 3 children under 6 while sorting out the entire emigration process alone. I was too busy to think about anything other than what I was going to do next on my list.

But I do think it's very normal to get cold feet. It's a big decision.
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Old Mar 6th 2018, 1:06 am
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Default Re: Does everyone get some level of cold feet?

I also went through the "zombie" or "like being in a film" sensation in the final days. I called at a salon on the way to the aurpott to have my eyebrows done and everyone around me was doing such normal things. I felt like I wasn't really there, like a ghost. The receptionist was asking people how their days is going when they arrived and when they paid just before they left she asked if they had any plans. Nobody was doing anything exciting. I couldn't bring myself to say "oh I'm on my way to the airport to move 5000 miles away for good" so I just said "not much" when she asked if I had any nice plans for the rest of the day.

At the airport, it was very surreal. It was only after the plane took off that it hit me I was going for good. Too late then.
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Old Mar 6th 2018, 1:58 am
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Smile Re: Does everyone get some level of cold feet?

I had a major wobble before moving to the USA last May, I was ready to throw in the towel and stay in the U.K. I guess once all the stree has gone with visas etc you start thinking too deeply about things. Fast forward to present day we are thoroughly enjoying our experience and are so glad we did it.
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