Matildaknot

Hello, everyone. I was a regular poster on this group and received alot of
help from all of you. I'm the USC, and my husband and I just had our AOS
interview in October. On the SAME DAY he was diagnosed with terminal cancer,
and he just died two weeks ago. I am in shock. I am posting here for two
reasons. One is because nobody except the people on this group know how hard
it is to go through the marriage immigration process. To lose the one you love
on the same day is something only you folks could imagine the pain. I feel
lonely in this part, and I guess I'm reaching out. The other reason I'm
posting is to remind you all that the important thing is your love for your
fiances and spouses, and to never let the immigration paperwork become the
front and center of your life no matter how difficult it is. We thought it was
our biggest mountain. It was not. I think I'm angry at every day I spent with
those damn forms and letters instead of adoring my husband. Be good to each
other, and never let the immigration stuff come before your love. With a very
sad heart, Mattie

Mattias Hembruch

In article <[email protected]>,
Matildaknot <[email protected]> wrote:
    >Hello, everyone. I was a regular poster on this group and received alot of
    >help from all of you. I'm the USC, and my husband and I just had our AOS
    >interview in October. On the SAME DAY he was diagnosed with terminal cancer,
    >and he just died two weeks ago. I am in shock. I am posting here for two
    >reasons. One is because nobody except the people on this group know how hard
    >it is to go through the marriage immigration process. To lose the one you love
    >on the same day is something only you folks could imagine the pain. I feel
    >lonely in this part, and I guess I'm reaching out. The other reason I'm
    >posting is to remind you all that the important thing is your love for your
    >fiances and spouses, and to never let the immigration paperwork become the
    >front and center of your life no matter how difficult it is. We thought it was
    >our biggest mountain. It was not. I think I'm angry at every day I spent with
    >those damn forms and letters instead of adoring my husband. Be good to each
    >other, and never let the immigration stuff come before your love. With a very
    >sad heart, Mattie

Wow.. My sympathies!!

Mattias

smurfyin2004

wow im sorry to hear this

youve had the greatest loss of your life after having to really fight the immigration process , i thank you for your advice and i will pass your story on to my fiance who is currently awaiting his K1 interview in london

As for your husband im sure every second with you made all the stress and paperwork worthwhile , he was lucky to have someone who really loved him until the end, alot of people are not that lucky

again im sorry to hear this

amber

Steffi

That's so sad I don't even know what to say. My heart goes out to you.

whistlestop01

Hi Mattie

So sorry to hear of your loss. I will always treasure each and every moment that I have with my husband of 9 months. I hope you have your family close by to support you in any way possible.

My thoughts are with you

Gisela

Bluegrass Lass

Mattie, no words I type can ease your pain. I can't imagine what you must be going through and my heart goes out to you. I sincerely hope you have friends and family nearby to help you through this time. You have just given me the extra-added inspiration to ensure my husband and I make the most of every day we are given. Thank you.

Best wishes
~Jamie & Scott

meauxna

Oh Mattie, I am so sorry to read your news. My deepest sympathies to you and thank you so much for sharing your story.
Jamie just said it all so well. Your inspiration can and *does* make a difference.
I hope each day is a little more tolerable for you.

Noorah101

Hi Mattie,

I'm so sorry for your devestating loss. I also lost my first husband to cancer, so I understand what you're going through. Your advice to others is excellent. Cherish each day as if it's your last, and live each day to the fullest...don't leave anything unsaid or undone. I learned the same lesson long ago, and it helped me cope with the long immigration process this time around.

My heart goes out to you. Take care of yourself. If you want to share more, you can email me at [email protected].

HUGS,
Rene

Suess

Mattie,

I'm so sorry to hear of your sad sad news.

My heart and goes out to you.

"Someone who had truly touched us will always be close

through the joy of memories and the beauty of love".

Thank you for the insight into what's really important in life.

Take care

Sue

Rete

Mattie

I'm saddened to read of your husband's death. There are no words to convey my sorrow for your loss. A dear friend of mine lost her husband to cancer as well on October 8 and I imagine you are as devastated as she is.

May you find comfort in knowing that you were loved and had the capacity to love. While the physical presence is missing from your life, his emotional gift to you remains alive and well in your heart and memories.

Blessed Be.

Rita

sphyrapicus

Mattie,

Thank you for sharing your story and your heartfelt words. You bring a new perspective to this immigration process. I am sorry for your loss and hope that you will tell us more about your husband in the days that follow. Please take care.

Matthew Udall

I'm very sorry to hear about your loss. I'm posting a reply as the last paragraph above reminds me of something I've thought about (after participating in news groups for a while and watching those dealing with their cases - and each other).

I worry sometimes that when people fixate on the process, and commiserate with each other (with their loved one…. And that's understandable as nobody likes to be separated from their loved one), and they only have spent a brief amount of "face to face" time with each other (as is often the case in the fiancée context); that when the case is approved and they no longer have a "common enemy" (USCIS and Consulate) to talk to each other about, that they soon find out they either don't really know that much about each other or perhaps find out they don't have much more to say.

Sort of like the character in the Robert Redford movie "The Candidate" that put all his energies into winning the election, only to say (once elected), "What am I going to do now?"

inquisitive40

My deepest sympathies to you. I am very sorry for your loss, remember that even though they may no longer be with you in body, their spirit will still be with you.
Patrick

ian-mstm

Sheila and I deeply regret your loss. Sheila's mom died this spring just a month after a diagnosis of stomach cancer. Know that you are in our thoughts.

Ian

SecretGarden

Mattie,
Please know that you have done something very important by posting your story and sharing your grief. I am so sorry for your loss, and I hope that you will find comfort and strength from many sources in the future. Good luck to you.

~SecretGarden