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Please help! To sick to go on the interview

Please help! To sick to go on the interview

Old Jun 10th 2004, 2:47 pm
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Default Please help! To sick to go on the interview

I have Panic Disorder since I arrive here in US( 2/ 1/2 years ago, now i have the interview next week and cannot appear, If i need to postpone do I need to explain and say the truth about my condition? I will start a new treatment this week so I don'`t know if the doctor will give me a medication or not, I am withouth hope!
Any help is appreciate!
Hugs

klalmoon
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Old Jun 10th 2004, 4:10 pm
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Default Re: Please help! To sick to go on the interview

Originally posted by klalmoon
I have Panic Disorder since I arrive here in US( 2/ 1/2 years ago, now i have the interview next week and cannot appear, If i need to postpone do I need to explain and say the truth about my condition? I will start a new treatment this week so I don'`t know if the doctor will give me a medication or not, I am withouth hope!
Any help is appreciate!
Hugs

klalmoon

Please do not take my response as being unkind, but with a panic disorder of 2-/12 years in length, if medication and therapy have not helped in all that time, what is the purpose of postponing the interview? Whether it is next week or next month or six months done the line, you will still have to appear for the interview. Can you not take the meds, search inside of yourself for the strength to attend and talk yourself into a semblence of normalcy to do what has to be done? Perhaps if you talked to yourself and told yourself you are going to do this and get it over and done with so you won't have to worry about facing this in the future, your mind will have one less thing to panic about. Just some suggestions.

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Old Jun 10th 2004, 4:44 pm
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Default Re: Please help! To sick to go on the interview

I wish was that easy!! :-))
I wasn't in treatment or taking any medication because the doctors visit is 200 +, I am dealing myself and my husband with this situation without any help from nobody, if you know Agorophobia is a serious condition that affects more than a million and I was the one that was immigrationg to this country when happened! I am looking for some answers how to explain this situation for someone that could understand and is not just strength that I need, because when you have fears and can'`t stand on your feet while you have a panic attack is overwelmed!! I am unable to put my feet of my house for a long time..I found a organization here in Texas that will attend me here in my house and give me a proper treatment but i need time to put myself together and attend the interview because I don'`t want to have a "panic attack" there while i am waiting or during the interview.....is very difficult....almost impossible.
I want to thank you and your not beeing unkind for sure!
Hugs
Claudia

Originally posted by Rete
Please do not take my response as being unkind, but with a panic disorder of 2-/12 years in length, if medication and therapy have not helped in all that time, what is the purpose of postponing the interview? Whether it is next week or next month or six months done the line, you will still have to appear for the interview. Can you not take the meds, search inside of yourself for the strength to attend and talk yourself into a semblence of normalcy to do what has to be done? Perhaps if you talked to yourself and told yourself you are going to do this and get it over and done with so you won't have to worry about facing this in the future, your mind will have one less thing to panic about. Just some suggestions.

Rete
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Old Jun 10th 2004, 4:52 pm
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Default Re: Please help! To sick to go on the interview

try out some self help books - they can be got from ebay pretty cheaply.

also, cut out caffiene, aspartme and any other stimulents - that can help.

finally, it might be worth saving up the $200 to see a doctor. i know all about panic disorder... and sometimes it's just not good to go through it by yourself. there comes a point where you've done what you can and to be quite honest, it is exhausting dealing with it day in and day out. get some medication that will help you through the interview process.

here's some info on panic disorder
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Old Jun 10th 2004, 4:54 pm
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Default Re: Please help! To sick to go on the interview

Geeze I did not read her second response or your post closely. Sorry, I thought you were SUGGESTING caffine!

Although stimulants can help some mental problems.



Originally posted by tortoise
try out some self help books - they can be got from ebay pretty cheaply.

also, cut out caffiene, aspartme and any other stimulents - that can help.

finally, it might be worth saving up the $200 to see a doctor. i know all about panic disorder... and sometimes it's just not good to go through it by yourself. there comes a point where you've done what you can and to be quite honest, it is exhausting dealing with it day in and day out. get some medication that will help you through the interview process.

here's some info on panic disorder

Last edited by DCMark; Jun 10th 2004 at 5:12 pm.
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Old Jun 10th 2004, 4:59 pm
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Default Re: Please help! To sick to go on the interview

ok mr rude man, this is what i read:

I wasn't in treatment or taking any medication because the doctors visit is 200 +, I am dealing myself and my husband with this situation without any help from nobody,
i was encouraging her to continue with seeing the doctor even though it is expensive.

there have also been many reports that aspartme can lead to various illnesses. try a google search.

also, when someone is trying to give some advice about something they've actually been through maybe hold back from being so rude?

how on earth can saying to someone that to stop drinking coffee and taking aspartme is dangerous? is taking these things actually good for ones health? please back that up.
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Old Jun 10th 2004, 5:03 pm
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Default Re: Please help! To sick to go on the interview

Originally posted by klalmoon
I have Panic Disorder since I arrive here in US( 2/ 1/2 years ago, now i have the interview next week and cannot appear, If i need to postpone do I need to explain and say the truth about my condition? I will start a new treatment this week so I don'`t know if the doctor will give me a medication or not, I am withouth hope!
Any help is appreciate!
Hugs

klalmoon
First of all, I am sorry to hear that you suffer from this. I have dealt with generalized anxiety disorder in the past, so I have an idea of how disabilitating this sort of thing can be.

I'm sure that your anxiety about the interview itself is not helping matters, am I right? Unfortunately this is not something one can simply switch off when things need to get done, no matter how important.

I think it's wonderful that you're going to try a new method of treatment, and hope that it works for you. However, I know from personal experience that it usually takes 2-3 months minimum for the new meds to start showing their effectiveness, so even if you got the meds tomorrow it wouldn't really make a difference by your interview next week.

So you basically have two options:

1) You can write the office where your interview is scheduled to take place and let them know that you will be unable to attend for medical reasons. I would include a letter from your doctor as verification of this. See if you can postpone it for 3 months or so, giving the new meds a chance to kick in.

2) Do whatever you can to go to the interview anyway, and explain to the interviewing officer what your situation is, so if you have to take a break or whatever, they will understand. I'm sure you're not the first person they've encountered who has a medical problem of some sort. Your husband will be with you, so that should bring you some comfort. Again, if you can bring a letter from your doctor explaining your condition, that may help as well.

You asked if you need to "explain and say the truth about my condition?" In a word, yes -- you should always tell the truth to immigration officials, in any case. Also, I don't know what country you're from, but Americans are generally much more aware and understanding of mental health issues than people from other countries. Going to a therapist or taking anti-depressants, for instance, do not carry the kind of stigma that it might in other cultures. Hopefully that might help you feel less ashamed of your condition, if in fact you do feel ashamed (most people do).

So to expand on Rete's response, I agree that if you are able in any way to go to the interview, short of breaking down and going to the emergency room for a panic attack, I would try to do so. This is the last hurdle you'll have immigration-wise for a very long time -- take advantage of jumping over it now, instead of prolonging it. It may actually HELP your condition, because you'll know it will basically be overwith once you do the interview.

Whatever you do, I would obtain a letter from your doctor explaining the scope of your condition. That way you can take it to the interview or include it in the letter you send in advising them you won't be attending and why.

On a personal note, I know you can overcome this, because I did. I was such a basketcase before that I couldn't hold down a job or do basic household chores, like washing dishes. It truly is disruptive and frustrating. I went on meds a few years ago for about a year, and got better. I stopped using the meds when the prescription ran out, and I haven't slipped back into that mode since. Having met Mark and marrying him only made things better. I've been working non-stop for 3 years now and have a full life. For a while I never thought I would ever have a full life, but now I do. So things CAN get better. Best of luck to you.

~ Jenney
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Old Jun 10th 2004, 5:06 pm
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Default Re: Please help! To sick to go on the interview

i've done some work for you DCMark - here's an article about aspartme. there are hundreds of others like it if you would like to take a look:

http://www.anxietypanic.com/aspartame.html

i am not saying that this is the cause of her anxiety, but it's certainly something for her to at least look at, which was my initial suggestion.

again, when someone is trying to help out with info, please think before jumping down their throats. my post did not warrent a flame.

many thanks.
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Old Jun 10th 2004, 5:07 pm
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Default Re: Please help! To sick to go on the interview

Hi,
Take this BIG truth : everybody has fearsand everybody panics.
The good thing is that you can go with your spouse to the interview. You can hold your spouse's hand while in there and put your trust in him that he is there for you whathever would happen, okay ? Besides that when I have fears about something the best solution is to take a big breathe and pray, God knows all your fears...I had many fears, I had to apply for visas and honestly I was so stressed and in panic about "what if it's not going to.." . Jesus Christ can heal your mind and deliver you from your fears, panic disorder and make you and your spouse happy people :-)

I am definatelly praying for you, make this big change in your life and have FAITH in GOD that your interview will be successful !

a

Originally posted by klalmoon
I wish was that easy!! :-))
I wasn't in treatment or taking any medication because the doctors visit is 200 +, I am dealing myself and my husband with this situation without any help from nobody, if you know Agorophobia is a serious condition that affects more than a million and I was the one that was immigrationg to this country when happened! I am looking for some answers how to explain this situation for someone that could understand and is not just strength that I need, because when you have fears and can'`t stand on your feet while you have a panic attack is overwelmed!! I am unable to put my feet of my house for a long time..I found a organization here in Texas that will attend me here in my house and give me a proper treatment but i need time to put myself together and attend the interview because I don'`t want to have a "panic attack" there while i am waiting or during the interview.....is very difficult....almost impossible.
I want to thank you and your not beeing unkind for sure!
Hugs
Claudia

Last edited by no-spam; Jun 10th 2004 at 5:25 pm.
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Old Jun 10th 2004, 5:22 pm
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Default Re: Please help! To sick to go on the interview

Dear Claudia you need to be healed and you can be , stop making a possesion out of your panic disorder, you need to stop thinking about it if not then it will develop it to something more serious.
When you feel like fainting and not being able to stay on your feet have water at yourself and drink it, besides that do you have a proper metabolism, do you eat properly ? You need to have some fun, you and your husband should plan to go out to see a movie, to take walks in a park, to have a date this week before the interview and stop talking about the interview and " What If ??". The only thing I would recommnend it would be to ask your husband to go through the documents that you need to show at the interview and to make copies of those documents and have a nicely organized file.

still in prayer for you.
a


Originally posted by no-spam
Hi,
Take this BIG truth : everybody has fearsand everybody panics.
The good thing is that you can go with your spouse to the interview. You can hold your spouse's hand while in there and put your trust in him that he is there for you whathever would happen, okay ? Besides that when I have fears about something the best solution is to take a big breathe and pray, God knows all your fears...I had many fears, I had to apply for visas and honestly I was so stressed and in panic about "what if it's not going to.." . Jesus Christ can heal your mind and deliver you from your fears, panic disorder and make you and your spouse people :-)

I am definatelly praying for you, make this big change in your life and have FAITH in GOD that your interview will be successful !



a
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Old Jun 10th 2004, 5:22 pm
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Default Re: Please help! To sick to go on the interview

Claudia

I recall you posted about your condition a while ago and asked for help then. Now, as then, I've never experienced a situation such as yours, so I cannot speak from first hand knowledge of your condition as having been there and done that. While I might find it difficult to understand this condition, does not mean I don't sympathize and have empathy for you. I know, however, that you are mentally and emotionally stronger than you allow yourself credit for. That is evident in the fact that you left your own country to embark on a new life. It is telling that your condition only started after you arrived here. I'm not a doctor but it would appear on the surface that the overwhelmning change in lifestyle and environment has much to do with your problem. Is there is mental health clinic in your area you can use? Perhaps an organization such as Catholic Charities which have clinics for those unable to afford mental healthcare costs. I used them many years ago for my daughter to help her deal with the effects of being raped at the age of 9. Or perhaps a major hospital's clinic.

As for the interview, yes you can postpone the interview. Write them in plenty of time advising them of why you cannot attend and be truthful and include the name of your doctor who is your primary physician and if possible a note from him. Send it via a form of mail that will generate a receipt and has a tracking method if you want to keep tabs on it.

Best wishes.

Rete

Originally posted by klalmoon
I wish was that easy!! :-))
I wasn't in treatment or taking any medication because the doctors visit is 200 +, I am dealing myself and my husband with this situation without any help from nobody, if you know Agorophobia is a serious condition that affects more than a million and I was the one that was immigrationg to this country when happened! I am looking for some answers how to explain this situation for someone that could understand and is not just strength that I need, because when you have fears and can'`t stand on your feet while you have a panic attack is overwelmed!! I am unable to put my feet of my house for a long time..I found a organization here in Texas that will attend me here in my house and give me a proper treatment but i need time to put myself together and attend the interview because I don'`t want to have a "panic attack" there while i am waiting or during the interview.....is very difficult....almost impossible.
I want to thank you and your not beeing unkind for sure!
Hugs
Claudia
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Old Jun 10th 2004, 5:27 pm
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Default Re: Please help! To sick to go on the interview

Thank you!!
I called INS today and explain that I will be unable to attend but didn'`t tell them about panic disorder, I was a little afraid because is difficult to explain, why you cannot go out of your home to get your green card since everybody is looking for this...I will speak with the doctor friday and ask her how to deal with this situation, now I am a little afraid because i didn'`t tell the truth about portponing my interview, the man over the phone(INS) told me that they will send me another letter with the new interview date so now i need to keep what i said about the reason to make another interview(i told that my husband is out of town working and cannot attend), now I just need to pray that they will give me 2 months or so to another interview so I will have some time to attend..I really understand that everybody wanted to help me and I want to thank you all!!

Bless you all
klalmoon

Originally posted by Jenney & Mark
First of all, I am sorry to hear that you suffer from this. I have dealt with generalized anxiety disorder in the past, so I have an idea of how disabilitating this sort of thing can be.

I'm sure that your anxiety about the interview itself is not helping matters, am I right? Unfortunately this is not something one can simply switch off when things need to get done, no matter how important.

I think it's wonderful that you're going to try a new method of treatment, and hope that it works for you. However, I know from personal experience that it usually takes 2-3 months minimum for the new meds to start showing their effectiveness, so even if you got the meds tomorrow it wouldn't really make a difference by your interview next week.

So you basically have two options:

1) You can write the office where your interview is scheduled to take place and let them know that you will be unable to attend for medical reasons. I would include a letter from your doctor as verification of this. See if you can postpone it for 3 months or so, giving the new meds a chance to kick in.

2) Do whatever you can to go to the interview anyway, and explain to the interviewing officer what your situation is, so if you have to take a break or whatever, they will understand. I'm sure you're not the first person they've encountered who has a medical problem of some sort. Your husband will be with you, so that should bring you some comfort. Again, if you can bring a letter from your doctor explaining your condition, that may help as well.

You asked if you need to "explain and say the truth about my condition?" In a word, yes -- you should always tell the truth to immigration officials, in any case. Also, I don't know what country you're from, but Americans are generally much more aware and understanding of mental health issues than people from other countries. Going to a therapist or taking anti-depressants, for instance, do not carry the kind of stigma that it might in other cultures. Hopefully that might help you feel less ashamed of your condition, if in fact you do feel ashamed (most people do).

So to expand on Rete's response, I agree that if you are able in any way to go to the interview, short of breaking down and going to the emergency room for a panic attack, I would try to do so. This is the last hurdle you'll have immigration-wise for a very long time -- take advantage of jumping over it now, instead of prolonging it. It may actually HELP your condition, because you'll know it will basically be overwith once you do the interview.

Whatever you do, I would obtain a letter from your doctor explaining the scope of your condition. That way you can take it to the interview or include it in the letter you send in advising them you won't be attending and why.

On a personal note, I know you can overcome this, because I did. I was such a basketcase before that I couldn't hold down a job or do basic household chores, like washing dishes. It truly is disruptive and frustrating. I went on meds a few years ago for about a year, and got better. I stopped using the meds when the prescription ran out, and I haven't slipped back into that mode since. Having met Mark and marrying him only made things better. I've been working non-stop for 3 years now and have a full life. For a while I never thought I would ever have a full life, but now I do. So things CAN get better. Best of luck to you.

~ Jenney
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Old Jun 10th 2004, 5:32 pm
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Default Re: Please help! To sick to go on the interview

Claudia,
I wouldn't have told them about your panic disorder either. Now I don;t know what is the truth about your husband's job, if that is true that he usually works out of town, then that's okay.



Originally posted by klalmoon
Thank you!!
I called INS today and explain that I will be unable to attend but didn'`t tell them about panic disorder, I was a little afraid because is difficult to explain, why you cannot go out of your home to get your green card since everybody is looking for this...I will speak with the doctor friday and ask her how to deal with this situation, now I am a little afraid because i didn'`t tell the truth about portponing my interview, the man over the phone(INS) told me that they will send me another letter with the new interview date so now i need to keep what i said about the reason to make another interview(i told that my husband is out of town working and cannot attend), now I just need to pray that they will give me 2 months or so to another interview so I will have some time to attend..I really understand that everybody wanted to help me and I want to thank you all!!

Bless you all
klalmoon
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Old Jun 10th 2004, 5:35 pm
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Default Re: Please help! To sick to go on the interview

Rete, I made a big mistake calling them and saying that my husband was unablle to attend, now what can I do? My interview is next week and I was so anxious about this situation that i called and they wil send me a letter about my next interview.
I am glad that you remember my problem some time ago..Yes is very hard living here without any family but I am very blessed to have a wonderful husband that support me!
I have found a very good support group that will attend me here ( inside my home) without any cost but I just found out late( one week before the interview).
What do you think? Do I need to call again or make my husband call and explain? ASk for the doctor write a letter explaining my situation? I don'`t know why I lie..Could say the truth but my husband told me that they could take this wrong because mental illness is a very delicate condition, they can think that I am nuts or something..lol..
Please I really need advice,!!
Bless you
klalmoon
Originally posted by Rete
Claudia

I recall you posted about your condition a while ago and asked for help then. Now, as then, I've never experienced a situation such as yours, so I cannot speak from first hand knowledge of your condition as having been there and done that. While I might find it difficult to understand this condition, does not mean I don't sympathize and have empathy for you. I know, however, that you are mentally and emotionally stronger than you allow yourself credit for. That is evident in the fact that you left your own country to embark on a new life. It is telling that your condition only started after you arrived here. I'm not a doctor but it would appear on the surface that the overwhelmning change in lifestyle and environment has much to do with your problem. Is there is mental health clinic in your area you can use? Perhaps an organization such as Catholic Charities which have clinics for those unable to afford mental healthcare costs. I used them many years ago for my daughter to help her deal with the effects of being raped at the age of 9. Or perhaps a major hospital's clinic.

As for the interview, yes you can postpone the interview. Write them in plenty of time advising them of why you cannot attend and be truthful and include the name of your doctor who is your primary physician and if possible a note from him. Send it via a form of mail that will generate a receipt and has a tracking method if you want to keep tabs on it.

Best wishes.

Rete
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Old Jun 10th 2004, 5:37 pm
  #15  
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Default Re: Please help! To sick to go on the interview

Originally posted by klalmoon
Thank you!!
I called INS today and explain that I will be unable to attend but didn'`t tell them about panic disorder, I was a little afraid because is difficult to explain, why you cannot go out of your home to get your green card since everybody is looking for this...I will speak with the doctor friday and ask her how to deal with this situation, now I am a little afraid because i didn'`t tell the truth about portponing my interview, the man over the phone(INS) told me that they will send me another letter with the new interview date so now i need to keep what i said about the reason to make another interview(i told that my husband is out of town working and cannot attend), now I just need to pray that they will give me 2 months or so to another interview so I will have some time to attend..I really understand that everybody wanted to help me and I want to thank you all!!

Bless you all
klalmoon
Claudia, I'm glad to hear you were able to reschedule your interview, if that's what you feel is best for you at this point.

However, PLEASE do not lie to immigration officials! I cannot stress this enough. If they ask you why you needed to postpone, do not make up a story like the one you did. Just tell them the truth.

There is nothing to be ashamed of -- you have a medical condition. It would be no different than if you couldn't go because you have a heart problem or epilepsy or a broken leg. Just because it is a mental disorder and not a physical disorder does not make it any less than what it is -- a disorder.

If they ask again about why your interview was postponed, tell them the truth. If they then ask why you told them something else, again tell the truth -- that you were afraid/ashamed of telling them about your condition. But no matter what, always tell the truth.

Keep us posted on what happens.

~ Jenney
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