Moving To US With Child?
Jan 22nd 2007, 6:22 pm
#1
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Moving To US With Child?
I am going to be moving to the States in early summer hopefully.
I have a 6 year old whose fatherI broke with when he was about a year old. We were never married.
His father has limited contact, ie he'll see him every 2-3 weeks when I call him to come and get him.
His father has paid child support regularly.
My question is, do I need his permission to take my son to the US with me??
If he has to give permission, refuses and the court bars me from taking my son abroad, does that mean my son's dad must be prepared to have custody??
Reason is, a while back I had been having terrible troubles with child care and asked my son's dad whether he would have him live with him, which he refused.
So obviously since he doesn'tewant custody, he can't stop me from taking my son abroad unless he's prepared to take custody right?
Other question is, the child support is an unofficial agreement between both of us, if he were to stop paying once we left for the US, is it possible to enforce payment??
I have a 6 year old whose fatherI broke with when he was about a year old. We were never married.
His father has limited contact, ie he'll see him every 2-3 weeks when I call him to come and get him.
His father has paid child support regularly.
My question is, do I need his permission to take my son to the US with me??
If he has to give permission, refuses and the court bars me from taking my son abroad, does that mean my son's dad must be prepared to have custody??
Reason is, a while back I had been having terrible troubles with child care and asked my son's dad whether he would have him live with him, which he refused.
So obviously since he doesn'tewant custody, he can't stop me from taking my son abroad unless he's prepared to take custody right?
Other question is, the child support is an unofficial agreement between both of us, if he were to stop paying once we left for the US, is it possible to enforce payment??
Jan 22nd 2007, 10:38 pm
#2
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Re: Moving To US With Child?
Rather depends on the Country concerned.
Jan 23rd 2007, 12:10 am
#3
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Location: San Francisco,USA.
Posts: 380
Re: Moving To US With Child?
I am going to be moving to the States in early summer hopefully.
I have a 6 year old whose fatherI broke with when he was about a year old. We were never married.
His father has limited contact, ie he'll see him every 2-3 weeks when I call him to come and get him.
His father has paid child support regularly.
My question is, do I need his permission to take my son to the US with me??
If he has to give permission, refuses and the court bars me from taking my son abroad, does that mean my son's dad must be prepared to have custody??
Reason is, a while back I had been having terrible troubles with child care and asked my son's dad whether he would have him live with him, which he refused.
So obviously since he doesn'tewant custody, he can't stop me from taking my son abroad unless he's prepared to take custody right?
Other question is, the child support is an unofficial agreement between both of us, if he were to stop paying once we left for the US, is it possible to enforce payment??
I have a 6 year old whose fatherI broke with when he was about a year old. We were never married.
His father has limited contact, ie he'll see him every 2-3 weeks when I call him to come and get him.
His father has paid child support regularly.
My question is, do I need his permission to take my son to the US with me??
If he has to give permission, refuses and the court bars me from taking my son abroad, does that mean my son's dad must be prepared to have custody??
Reason is, a while back I had been having terrible troubles with child care and asked my son's dad whether he would have him live with him, which he refused.
So obviously since he doesn'tewant custody, he can't stop me from taking my son abroad unless he's prepared to take custody right?
Other question is, the child support is an unofficial agreement between both of us, if he were to stop paying once we left for the US, is it possible to enforce payment??
>>Probably, yes. Seek legal advice.
If he has to give permission, refuses and the court bars me from taking my son abroad, does that mean my son's dad must be prepared to have custody??
>>Morally, yes. Legally, no.
So obviously since he doesn'tewant custody, he can't stop me from taking my son abroad unless he's prepared to take custody right?
>>Not necessarily. Don't make that assumption. Seek legal advice.
Other question is, the child support is an unofficial agreement between both of us, if he were to stop paying once we left for the US, is it possible to enforce payment??
>>No it isn't. Court-mandated child support is, however. Depends on your nationality. UK court-mandated child support, for example, is.
I get the feeling there is more to your story than you are letting on. Makes it much easier to answer your questions if you tell the whole story at the outset.
Jan 23rd 2007, 12:46 am
#4
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Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 46,405
Re: Moving To US With Child?
I am going to be moving to the States in early summer hopefully.
I have a 6 year old whose fatherI broke with when he was about a year old. We were never married.
His father has limited contact, ie he'll see him every 2-3 weeks when I call him to come and get him.
His father has paid child support regularly.
My question is, do I need his permission to take my son to the US with me??
I have a 6 year old whose fatherI broke with when he was about a year old. We were never married.
His father has limited contact, ie he'll see him every 2-3 weeks when I call him to come and get him.
His father has paid child support regularly.
My question is, do I need his permission to take my son to the US with me??
If he has to give permission, refuses and the court bars me from taking my son abroad, does that mean my son's dad must be prepared to have custody??
is, a while back I had been having terrible troubles with child care and asked my son's dad whether he would have him live with him, which he refused.
So obviously since he doesn'tewant custody, he can't stop me from taking my son abroad unless he's prepared to take custody right?
So obviously since he doesn'tewant custody, he can't stop me from taking my son abroad unless he's prepared to take custody right?
uestion is, the child support is an unofficial agreement between both of us, if he were to stop paying once we left for the US, is it possible to enforce payment??
Jan 23rd 2007, 1:05 am
#5
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Location: Kentucky
Posts: 38,865
Re: Moving To US With Child?
If he has to give permission, refuses and the court bars me from taking my son abroad, does that mean my son's dad must be prepared to have custody?
So obviously since he doesn'tewant custody, he can't stop me from taking my son abroad unless he's prepared to take custody right?
Other question is, the child support is an unofficial agreement between both of us, if he were to stop paying once we left for the US, is it possible to enforce payment??
Ian
Jan 23rd 2007, 1:36 am
#6
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Joined: Jan 2005
Location: HOME
Posts: 23,181
Re: Moving To US With Child?
Yes.
No... it means you need to stop being a selfish b*tch and put your son's welfare before your own!
Wrong! He can refuse to give permission *and* he is not required to take custody.
And that's when the sh*t hit the fan. Geez... you want it all, don't you? You want to skip across the pond in your hormone-induced fantasy, abandon your son to a father who doesn't want custody, *and* you want him to keep paying for the privilege. You're a real piece of work!
Ian
No... it means you need to stop being a selfish b*tch and put your son's welfare before your own!
Wrong! He can refuse to give permission *and* he is not required to take custody.
And that's when the sh*t hit the fan. Geez... you want it all, don't you? You want to skip across the pond in your hormone-induced fantasy, abandon your son to a father who doesn't want custody, *and* you want him to keep paying for the privilege. You're a real piece of work!
Ian
This woman has been bringing up a child on her own, with apparently very little support from the father (apart from some financial support). She now has the temerity to want some happiness for herself, and is asking some factual questions related to issues that are likely to affect her future. WTF is wrong with that?
Yes, clearly she needs to take legal advice. But there is no excuse for biting her head off!
Ian, do you really think that labelling yourself 'sanctimonious prick' gives you licence to ride roughshod over other people's feelings?
Jan 23rd 2007, 3:40 am
#7
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Posts: 2
Re: Moving To US With Child?
I was told that in the US you would have trouble moving a child out of State never mind out of Country without the agreement of the other parent.
No doubt there can be exceptions.
Probably best not to get into the rights and wrongs, sometimes difficult to make a call when you think you do know all the facts.
No doubt there can be exceptions.
Probably best not to get into the rights and wrongs, sometimes difficult to make a call when you think you do know all the facts.
Jan 23rd 2007, 5:26 am
#8
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Re: Moving To US With Child?
Yes.
No... it means you need to stop being a selfish b*tch and put your son's welfare before your own!
Wrong! He can refuse to give permission *and* he is not required to take custody.
And that's when the sh*t hit the fan. Geez... you want it all, don't you? You want to skip across the pond in your hormone-induced fantasy, abandon your son to a father who doesn't want custody, *and* you want him to keep paying for the privilege. You're a real piece of work!
Ian
No... it means you need to stop being a selfish b*tch and put your son's welfare before your own!
Wrong! He can refuse to give permission *and* he is not required to take custody.
And that's when the sh*t hit the fan. Geez... you want it all, don't you? You want to skip across the pond in your hormone-induced fantasy, abandon your son to a father who doesn't want custody, *and* you want him to keep paying for the privilege. You're a real piece of work!
Ian
What could I have been thinking of??
Taking my son away from his father an depriving him of his bi monthly visits!!
Terrible!!
And actually having the temerity to think a father should pay towards their child! Scandalous!!
I have realized the error of my ways, I shall sin no more.....
On a more serious note, obviously recieving permission is by far the easiest route. If he does give permission, what form should that take?? ie, would a letter suffice or would it need to be done through a lawyer?
I am in the UK and would be going to the US.
Jan 23rd 2007, 5:44 am
#9
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Re: Moving To US With Child?
um.....As far as I know there is nothing else relevant to add to the facts I've supplied...
From now on, I promise not be a selfish b*tch...I'm already wearing my sackcloth and ashes as penance for even thinking of such a scheme!!
What could I have been thinking of??
Taking my son away from his father an depriving him of his bi monthly visits!!
Terrible!!
And actually having the temerity to think a father should pay towards their child! Scandalous!!
I have realized the error of my ways, I shall sin no more.....
On a more serious note, obviously recieving permission is by far the easiest route. If he does give permission, what form should that take?? ie, would a letter suffice or would it need to be done through a lawyer?
I am in the UK and would be going to the US.
From now on, I promise not be a selfish b*tch...I'm already wearing my sackcloth and ashes as penance for even thinking of such a scheme!!
What could I have been thinking of??
Taking my son away from his father an depriving him of his bi monthly visits!!
Terrible!!
And actually having the temerity to think a father should pay towards their child! Scandalous!!
I have realized the error of my ways, I shall sin no more.....
On a more serious note, obviously recieving permission is by far the easiest route. If he does give permission, what form should that take?? ie, would a letter suffice or would it need to be done through a lawyer?
I am in the UK and would be going to the US.
My gut feel that if you want child support and all the documentation tied up you need a Court order, I have yet to see somebody go through the child support process having moved to the US. What if the Court required visitation rights?
Jan 23rd 2007, 6:49 am
#10
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Re: Moving To US With Child?
Have a look on the USA board, there was a similar thread a month or so back.
My gut feel that if you want child support and all the documentation tied up you need a Court order, I have yet to see somebody go through the child support process having moved to the US. What if the Court required visitation rights?
My gut feel that if you want child support and all the documentation tied up you need a Court order, I have yet to see somebody go through the child support process having moved to the US. What if the Court required visitation rights?
Which board was the topic on?
Any key words I can search for?
Jan 23rd 2007, 12:11 pm
#11
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Re: Moving To US With Child?
Just a thought here... if he only gets bi monthly visits, and you move
away, perhaps you can create a new agreement (like a month in the
summer) or specific holidays or something to make up for missing those
visits.
Where I live, the ability for a separated couple to move further apart
when they share custody depends on the frequency of the visits, and the
agreement they can come to to allow this to happen. You'd need to seek
the advice of your family lawyer in this matter.
The father will need to sign the passport for the child, and you will
likely need to prove permission to travel (for the child) when getting
your Visas to move to the US (for the visa to be granted).
S.
AlienUk wrote:
> > Yes.
> >
> >
> >
> > No... it means you need to stop being a selfish b*tch and put your
> > son's welfare before your own!
> >
> >
> >
> > Wrong! He can refuse to give permission *and* he is not required to
> > take custody.
> >
> >
> >
> > And that's when the sh*t hit the fan. Geez... you want it all, don't
> > you? You want to skip across the pond in your hormone-induced fantasy,
> > abandon your son to a father who doesn't want custody, *and* you want
> > him to keep paying for the privilege. You're a real piece of work!
> >
> > Ian
>
> um.....As far as I know there is nothing else relevant to add to the
> facts I've supplied...
>
>
> From now on, I promise not be a selfish b*tch...I'm already wearing
> my sackcloth and ashes as penance for even thinking of such a
> scheme!!
> What could I have been thinking of??
> Taking my son away from his father an depriving him of his bi
> monthly visits!!
> Terrible!!
> And actually having the temerity to think a father should pay
> towards their child! Scandalous!!
> I have realized the error of my ways, I shall sin no
> more.....
>
>
> On a more serious note, obviously recieving permission is by far the
> easiest route. If he does give permission, what form should that take??
> ie, would a letter suffice or would it need to be done through a lawyer?
>
> I am in the UK and would be going to the US.
>
> --
away, perhaps you can create a new agreement (like a month in the
summer) or specific holidays or something to make up for missing those
visits.
Where I live, the ability for a separated couple to move further apart
when they share custody depends on the frequency of the visits, and the
agreement they can come to to allow this to happen. You'd need to seek
the advice of your family lawyer in this matter.
The father will need to sign the passport for the child, and you will
likely need to prove permission to travel (for the child) when getting
your Visas to move to the US (for the visa to be granted).
S.
AlienUk wrote:
> > Yes.
> >
> >
> >
> > No... it means you need to stop being a selfish b*tch and put your
> > son's welfare before your own!
> >
> >
> >
> > Wrong! He can refuse to give permission *and* he is not required to
> > take custody.
> >
> >
> >
> > And that's when the sh*t hit the fan. Geez... you want it all, don't
> > you? You want to skip across the pond in your hormone-induced fantasy,
> > abandon your son to a father who doesn't want custody, *and* you want
> > him to keep paying for the privilege. You're a real piece of work!
> >
> > Ian
>
> um.....As far as I know there is nothing else relevant to add to the
> facts I've supplied...
>
>
> From now on, I promise not be a selfish b*tch...I'm already wearing
> my sackcloth and ashes as penance for even thinking of such a
> scheme!!
> What could I have been thinking of??
> Taking my son away from his father an depriving him of his bi
> monthly visits!!
> Terrible!!
> And actually having the temerity to think a father should pay
> towards their child! Scandalous!!
> I have realized the error of my ways, I shall sin no
> more.....
>
>
> On a more serious note, obviously recieving permission is by far the
> easiest route. If he does give permission, what form should that take??
> ie, would a letter suffice or would it need to be done through a lawyer?
>
> I am in the UK and would be going to the US.
>
> --
Jan 23rd 2007, 12:51 pm
#12
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Joined: Aug 2002
Location: Kentucky
Posts: 38,865
Re: Moving To US With Child?
She never once suggested that she would choose to stay where she is. She writes, "If he has to give permission, refuses and the court bars me from taking my son abroad, does that mean my son's dad must be prepared to have custody?" Where in all this is the hint of an idea that she would give up her plans to move to the US for the sake of staying with her son? Nowhere! I call 'em as I see 'em.
Oh gosh, no... I can quite easily trash other people without calling myself a sanctimonious prick.
Ian
Ian, do you really think that labelling yourself 'sanctimonious prick' gives you licence to ride roughshod over other people's feelings?
Ian
Jan 23rd 2007, 1:29 pm
#13
Concierge
Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 46,405
Re: Moving To US With Child?
If you search through the US Marriage-based visa forum on the BE site (which might be were you should be posting if you are entering the US for marriage to a USC) then you will find many postings there.
There are several posters in the past with your type of difficulty. In some cases the biological father can be a arse if they are vindictive or if you have had a bad relationship with him. In most of the cases, however, the parent has been willing without court intervention to grant the custodial parent the right to remove the child from the country in lieu of visitation privileges such as you described.
If he agrees to it, it is far better to have the letter drawn up by an attorney and signed in their presence so that there is quarrel in the future about an irregularity in the terms.
There are several posters in the past with your type of difficulty. In some cases the biological father can be a arse if they are vindictive or if you have had a bad relationship with him. In most of the cases, however, the parent has been willing without court intervention to grant the custodial parent the right to remove the child from the country in lieu of visitation privileges such as you described.
If he agrees to it, it is far better to have the letter drawn up by an attorney and signed in their presence so that there is quarrel in the future about an irregularity in the terms.
I would rather not go through the courts until forced to, obviously I am hoping something can be worked out informally, but obviously if that isn't an option would have to go that route...As for visitation rights, I was thinking of having my son come back over the summer holidays and maybe at Easter or Xmas to stay with his dad or his paternal grandmother (who I have a great relationship with). Remains of course to be seen whether his father or the courts would have a problem with this.
Which board was the topic on?
Any key words I can search for?
Which board was the topic on?
Any key words I can search for?
Jan 23rd 2007, 1:38 pm
#14
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Joined: Aug 2002
Location: Kentucky
Posts: 38,865
Re: Moving To US With Child?
I have no idea... but your son doesn't seem to be very high on the food chain. You're moving to the US and his father doesn't want him... and you seem to want to force custody on the father rather than alter your plans to move - and you've written nothing so far to dispute this.
I have no problem with fathers paying child support... but you're suggesting that he be forced to pay even though you're taking his son beyond his control and out of the UK court's jurisdiction.
And, y'know... here's the one question that no one has yet asked and to which you haven't offered information: Why are you moving to the US? For a new guy? For a job? If the former, well... you'll have to deal with your own conscience; if the latter, then why worry about child support from the father?
Well then... okay! 
I imagine a letter signed by him will be sufficient... but you may want an attorney to look it over to make sure there are no other issues.
Ian
And actually having the temerity to think a father should pay towards their child!
And, y'know... here's the one question that no one has yet asked and to which you haven't offered information: Why are you moving to the US? For a new guy? For a job? If the former, well... you'll have to deal with your own conscience; if the latter, then why worry about child support from the father?
I have realized the error of my ways, I shall sin no more.
If he does give permission, what form should that take?? ie, would a letter suffice or would it need to be done through a lawyer?
Ian
Jan 23rd 2007, 1:46 pm
#15
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Re: Moving To US With Child?
I have no idea... but your son doesn't seem to be very high on the food chain. You're moving to the US and his father doesn't want him... and you seem to want to force custody on the father rather than alter your plans to move - and you've written nothing so far to dispute this.
I have no problem with fathers paying child support... but you're suggesting that he be forced to pay even though you're taking his son beyond his control and out of the UK court's jurisdiction.
And, y'know... here's the one question that no one has yet asked and to which you haven't offered information: Why are you moving to the US? For a new guy? For a job? If the former, well... you'll have to deal with your own conscience; if the latter, then why worry about child support from the father?
Well then... okay!
I imagine a letter signed by him will be sufficient... but you may want an attorney to look it over to make sure there are no other issues.
Ian
I have no problem with fathers paying child support... but you're suggesting that he be forced to pay even though you're taking his son beyond his control and out of the UK court's jurisdiction.
And, y'know... here's the one question that no one has yet asked and to which you haven't offered information: Why are you moving to the US? For a new guy? For a job? If the former, well... you'll have to deal with your own conscience; if the latter, then why worry about child support from the father?
Well then... okay!
I imagine a letter signed by him will be sufficient... but you may want an attorney to look it over to make sure there are no other issues.
Ian
Unfortunately you have made me realize I'm devoid of a conscience, I'm hoping constant advice from you will help me to stay on the right track...