Help! - I don't want to have to hurt someone..
Nov 19th 2008, 12:52 am
#76
Peace onion
Joined: Jul 2006
Location: Denver
Posts: 5,686
Re: Help! - I don't want to have to hurt someone..
Bon, there was no intentional pun on the "high".
djb1000, I loved your advice too.
mayehmuk, I didn't tar cheerleaders per se. I slammed their mothers. Who have usually, as someone brilliantly stated, arrested at the mentality of a 17 year old.
Good for you for scoring a cheerleader. I'm too ugly and not cool enough to.
But then, knowing the cheerleaders I've known, I'm not particularly that upset. Your mileage may vary.
djb1000, I loved your advice too.
mayehmuk, I didn't tar cheerleaders per se. I slammed their mothers. Who have usually, as someone brilliantly stated, arrested at the mentality of a 17 year old.
Good for you for scoring a cheerleader. I'm too ugly and not cool enough to.
But then, knowing the cheerleaders I've known, I'm not particularly that upset. Your mileage may vary.
Nov 19th 2008, 1:05 am
#77
Forum Regular
Joined: Nov 2007
Location: USA
Posts: 115
Re: Help! - I don't want to have to hurt someone..
Sambapink wrote:
Thanks for all your replies.. appreciated. Hopefully its highlighted one of the cultural differences we have to contend with when moving here.. and maybe someone else might gain some insight into it. OR, maybe not.. maybe others choose to read my post completely differently.. whatever.
PMSL - you know i know where this was going.
My 2ps worth is rise above it all my lovely. I am sure the coach feels intimdated by you not being like all the rest. this is not a bad thing - it just goes to show we are ALL different in many ways xx
Thanks for all your replies.. appreciated. Hopefully its highlighted one of the cultural differences we have to contend with when moving here.. and maybe someone else might gain some insight into it. OR, maybe not.. maybe others choose to read my post completely differently.. whatever.
PMSL - you know i know where this was going.
My 2ps worth is rise above it all my lovely. I am sure the coach feels intimdated by you not being like all the rest. this is not a bad thing - it just goes to show we are ALL different in many ways xx
Nov 19th 2008, 1:28 am
#78
Sursum corda
Joined: Sep 2002
Location: Richmond Hill, GA USA
Posts: 38,860
Re: Help! - I don't want to have to hurt someone..
Yeah and tell her I'll come and challenge her to a thumb war, that ought stop her in her tracks. 
Nov 19th 2008, 2:20 am
#79
Lost in BE Cyberspace
Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 22,105
Re: Help! - I don't want to have to hurt someone..
So, theres this woman.. Shes the cheerleading coach for my daughters team.. She seems to not like me at all.. hmmm, Not even had a proper conversation with the woman.
I'm the kind of mum that gets my kids to practice on time, will make sure they always have what they need.. contribute when needed and always there for games etc.. However, I am not and never wish to be in the 'click' .. I mind my own.. don't get the 'in' jokes.. don't sit and chitter chatter with the mums. Now thats not to say i'm not friendly and smile and chat if someone comes up to me (not that anyone does).. to be honest most of the time I haven't a clue what there going on about!
Well, this coach has taken a dislike of me.. A few times she has commented on my accent and mocking certain expressions I use.. and if I say something to her, she just looks at me with a weird expression as if to say 'i have NO idea what your saying'.. Ignorant Bitch! - Last week we had a 'moms meeting' about this bloody Florida trip.. I sat and listened, put my name down for volunteering and contributed items for baskets to be raffled. Anyway, in front of everyone she says all sarcastically "your not saying much, have you got anything to contribute' :curse:
None of the mums had volunteered for 'security duty' at cheer competition on Sunday.. and i could have bet my mortgage that she would email me personally to ask me to do it.. and she did.. I have no problem doing it, but I'm pissed off thats she has singled me out.
This is what gets my goat most.. A few weeks back at a match the football players chose a cheerleader to wear their shirt.. My daughter got the star players shirt.. whoopdy doooo.. who gives a toss.. well apperantely quite a few of the mums.. because there little angel didn't get it!!! - and especially this coach it would appear.. I haven't the time or energy to be dealing with the ridiculousness of it all
And I have to spend a week with these people.. I swear to god someone will get hurt!!
How do I deal with this woman.. I want to say something to her to put her in her place.. whilst being cool and collected!! - (NOT my best attributes!)
I'm the kind of mum that gets my kids to practice on time, will make sure they always have what they need.. contribute when needed and always there for games etc.. However, I am not and never wish to be in the 'click' .. I mind my own.. don't get the 'in' jokes.. don't sit and chitter chatter with the mums. Now thats not to say i'm not friendly and smile and chat if someone comes up to me (not that anyone does).. to be honest most of the time I haven't a clue what there going on about!
Well, this coach has taken a dislike of me.. A few times she has commented on my accent and mocking certain expressions I use.. and if I say something to her, she just looks at me with a weird expression as if to say 'i have NO idea what your saying'.. Ignorant Bitch! - Last week we had a 'moms meeting' about this bloody Florida trip.. I sat and listened, put my name down for volunteering and contributed items for baskets to be raffled. Anyway, in front of everyone she says all sarcastically "your not saying much, have you got anything to contribute' :curse:
None of the mums had volunteered for 'security duty' at cheer competition on Sunday.. and i could have bet my mortgage that she would email me personally to ask me to do it.. and she did.. I have no problem doing it, but I'm pissed off thats she has singled me out.
This is what gets my goat most.. A few weeks back at a match the football players chose a cheerleader to wear their shirt.. My daughter got the star players shirt.. whoopdy doooo.. who gives a toss.. well apperantely quite a few of the mums.. because there little angel didn't get it!!! - and especially this coach it would appear.. I haven't the time or energy to be dealing with the ridiculousness of it all
And I have to spend a week with these people.. I swear to god someone will get hurt!!
How do I deal with this woman.. I want to say something to her to put her in her place.. whilst being cool and collected!! - (NOT my best attributes!)
I'd tell her off big time, maybe that's the only way to get through to her......
Nov 19th 2008, 2:54 am
#80
Arrogant ****
Joined: Jan 2004
Location: Plano, TX
Posts: 4,323
Re: Help! - I don't want to have to hurt someone..
Actually, in the real world, what happens is that someone is rude / objectionable / insulting, and you blow your lid and YOU look like a dick, so by being prepared with a pointed (but polite) response, it gives you the opportunity to not look like a complete pushover, and stops you from responding in an over the top manner.
If it's a pointed enough response, it might work on its own, but if necessary, can lead to that private discussion later.
If it's a pointed enough response, it might work on its own, but if necessary, can lead to that private discussion later.
Your personal example of using pre-prepared responses was actually for someone who worked for you, wasn't it? Samba has no such power or seniority over the coach.
Nov 19th 2008, 10:34 am
#81
SUPER MODERATOR
Joined: Dec 2005
Posts: 88,023
Re: Help! - I don't want to have to hurt someone..
Thats so true.......jim has deal with parents every day coaching hockey
Please dear god dont let jim hear you say that.....
Im just curious sama - and Im not being judgemental at all because Im a hockey mom, but is there a reason that you dont sit with the other parents at practices and games?
Please dear god dont let jim hear you say that.....
Im just curious sama - and Im not being judgemental at all because Im a hockey mom, but is there a reason that you dont sit with the other parents at practices and games?
Nov 19th 2008, 12:49 pm
#82
BE Forum Addict
Joined: Sep 2008
Location: Charles Town West Virginia
Posts: 1,220
Re: Help! - I don't want to have to hurt someone..
The parents and some of the coaches at my kids soccer things are pretty awful. Very clickish and pretty rude too.
Nov 19th 2008, 2:07 pm
#83
Peace onion
Joined: Jul 2006
Location: Denver
Posts: 5,686
Re: Help! - I don't want to have to hurt someone..
Not singling anybody out, but the word is cliquish.
Main Entry:
clique Listen to the pronunciation of clique Listen to the pronunciation of clique
Pronunciation:
\ˈklēk, ˈklik\
Function:
noun
Etymology:
French
Date:
1711
: a narrow exclusive circle or group of persons ; especially : one held together by common interests, views, or purposes
— cliqu·ey Listen to the pronunciation of cliquey \ˈklē-kē, ˈkli-\ adjective
— cliqu·ish Listen to the pronunciation of cliquish \ˈkli-kish\ adjective
— cliqu·ish·ly adverb
— cliqu·ish·ness noun
Main Entry:
clique Listen to the pronunciation of clique Listen to the pronunciation of clique
Pronunciation:
\ˈklēk, ˈklik\
Function:
noun
Etymology:
French
Date:
1711
: a narrow exclusive circle or group of persons ; especially : one held together by common interests, views, or purposes
— cliqu·ey Listen to the pronunciation of cliquey \ˈklē-kē, ˈkli-\ adjective
— cliqu·ish Listen to the pronunciation of cliquish \ˈkli-kish\ adjective
— cliqu·ish·ly adverb
— cliqu·ish·ness noun
Nov 19th 2008, 2:09 pm
#84
Peace onion
Joined: Jul 2006
Location: Denver
Posts: 5,686
Re: Help! - I don't want to have to hurt someone..
This is an example of clicking - Xhosa.
Nov 19th 2008, 2:16 pm
#85
BE Forum Addict
Joined: Sep 2008
Location: Charles Town West Virginia
Posts: 1,220
Nov 19th 2008, 2:22 pm
#86
BE Forum Addict
Thread Starter
Joined: May 2007
Location: O.C. CA
Posts: 3,694
Re: Help! - I don't want to have to hurt someone..
Suitably corrected...
Nov 19th 2008, 2:25 pm
#87
Account Closed
Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 0
Re: Help! - I don't want to have to hurt someone..
If you daughter is having fun and enjoying being a cheerleader then you pretty much just need to either bite your tongue or play the "I'm a Brit, help me understand this" card.That was my mantra, sometimes it gets you accepted a lot easier.
My daughter was a cheer leader for a while when she was in Junior High. I always hovered in the back ground, didn't say too much and let the other mothers get on with it. Daughter was voted head cheer leader which didn't go down too well at all but she was the cheer leaders choice not the mums! I was the only mum that worked so I always said I would help out when I could but sometimes I would be working, it was a good excuse not to become over involved. We always made sure either me or OH got daughter to practise/games etc and we provided goodies for bake sales.
Thankfully we never had to travel to major competitions, and by the time she got to high school she was tired of the cheer leader clique!
My daughter was a cheer leader for a while when she was in Junior High. I always hovered in the back ground, didn't say too much and let the other mothers get on with it. Daughter was voted head cheer leader which didn't go down too well at all but she was the cheer leaders choice not the mums! I was the only mum that worked so I always said I would help out when I could but sometimes I would be working, it was a good excuse not to become over involved. We always made sure either me or OH got daughter to practise/games etc and we provided goodies for bake sales.
Thankfully we never had to travel to major competitions, and by the time she got to high school she was tired of the cheer leader clique!
Nov 19th 2008, 2:32 pm
#88
Sursum corda
Joined: Sep 2002
Location: Richmond Hill, GA USA
Posts: 38,860
Re: Help! - I don't want to have to hurt someone..
Nov 19th 2008, 2:36 pm
#89
BE Forum Addict
Joined: Sep 2008
Location: Charles Town West Virginia
Posts: 1,220
Re: Help! - I don't want to have to hurt someone..
and if she looks at you all non-plussed, deer in the headlights. Asker her....what is it that I have said that you don't understand.....smiling, of course.
Nov 19th 2008, 3:57 pm
#90
Are we there yet?
Joined: Jul 2007
Location: 31 miles from Cool (California)
Posts: 2,467
Re: Help! - I don't want to have to hurt someone..
How did practice go last night?