Children In Home Country
Oct 17th 2003, 9:22 pm
#1
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Joined: Oct 2002
Location: UK Citizen Now In Baltimore County USA
Posts: 906
Children In Home Country
Ok like some of you I guess, my children (twin boys of 16 and daughter 19) live with their mother in the UK, so that they can finish their schooling and college. My children come over on a regular basis and like me, are totally comfortable with the situation.
How do people here cope with the distance, and how do you make communication between you easier. Of course we all know only too well the benefit of internet chat....Arghhhhhhhhh that again, but in order to maintain the focus on being a parent, it can be difficult.
Does anyone have any good ideas, and do those in my position tend to be more lenient because they feel guilty about moving away. I am sure there are those who would critical of this situation and some who might like to label it as abandonment, bad parent all that crap, so if you feel like posting along those lines don’t bother lol
Rob
How do people here cope with the distance, and how do you make communication between you easier. Of course we all know only too well the benefit of internet chat....Arghhhhhhhhh that again, but in order to maintain the focus on being a parent, it can be difficult.
Does anyone have any good ideas, and do those in my position tend to be more lenient because they feel guilty about moving away. I am sure there are those who would critical of this situation and some who might like to label it as abandonment, bad parent all that crap, so if you feel like posting along those lines don’t bother lol
Rob
Oct 17th 2003, 10:01 pm
#2
Mummy and baby 1982
Joined: May 2003
Location: North West Chicago Suburbs
Posts: 1,067
Re: Children In Home Country
[QUOTE]Originally posted by robclews
Ok like some of you I guess, my children (twin boys of 16 and daughter 19) live with their mother in the UK, so that they can finish their schooling and college. My children come over on a regular basis and like me, are totally comfortable with the situation.
How do people here cope with the distance, and how do you make communication between you easier. Of course we all know only too well the benefit of internet chat....Arghhhhhhhhh that again, but in order to maintain the focus on being a parent, it can be difficult.
Does anyone have any good ideas, and do those in my position tend to be more lenient because they feel guilty about moving away. I am sure there are those who would critical of this situation and some who might like to label it as abandonment, bad parent all that crap, so if you feel like posting along those lines don’t bother lol
Hi Rob
Like you, both my kids are in the UK. They are 19 and 21 so not really little any more but still my kids. I was a single parent from the time my youngest was 3 years old and it's only in the last couple of years that I met and married my now husband. Up until that time my children always came first. They were the first to say I should be happy with the man I love as they could see how good he is and how happy he makes me. However even with their "blessing" it doesn't make it any easier being so far away from them. I'd like to say I'm not more lenient with them but I probably am!!
My daughter hates computers so doesn't like to use e mail that much. My son is computer mad but hates writing e mails!! So we mostly talk on the phone or sometimes write letters to each other. My daughter loves getting letters. We had a serious family crisis towards the end of August which just couln't be resolved by phone or letter so after being in this country 6 weeks, I had to get on a plane and go back to UK and sort it out.
I've only been here in the US since July so my coping mechanisms vary and sometimes they don't work at all! It's an extremely emotive subject and one that really can't be fully discussed in an open forum like this one but I'd be more than happy to talk in a PM.
Maggie
Ok like some of you I guess, my children (twin boys of 16 and daughter 19) live with their mother in the UK, so that they can finish their schooling and college. My children come over on a regular basis and like me, are totally comfortable with the situation.
How do people here cope with the distance, and how do you make communication between you easier. Of course we all know only too well the benefit of internet chat....Arghhhhhhhhh that again, but in order to maintain the focus on being a parent, it can be difficult.
Does anyone have any good ideas, and do those in my position tend to be more lenient because they feel guilty about moving away. I am sure there are those who would critical of this situation and some who might like to label it as abandonment, bad parent all that crap, so if you feel like posting along those lines don’t bother lol
Hi Rob
Like you, both my kids are in the UK. They are 19 and 21 so not really little any more but still my kids. I was a single parent from the time my youngest was 3 years old and it's only in the last couple of years that I met and married my now husband. Up until that time my children always came first. They were the first to say I should be happy with the man I love as they could see how good he is and how happy he makes me. However even with their "blessing" it doesn't make it any easier being so far away from them. I'd like to say I'm not more lenient with them but I probably am!!
My daughter hates computers so doesn't like to use e mail that much. My son is computer mad but hates writing e mails!! So we mostly talk on the phone or sometimes write letters to each other. My daughter loves getting letters. We had a serious family crisis towards the end of August which just couln't be resolved by phone or letter so after being in this country 6 weeks, I had to get on a plane and go back to UK and sort it out.
I've only been here in the US since July so my coping mechanisms vary and sometimes they don't work at all! It's an extremely emotive subject and one that really can't be fully discussed in an open forum like this one but I'd be more than happy to talk in a PM.
Maggie
Oct 17th 2003, 10:08 pm
#3
Forum Regular
Joined: Sep 2002
Location: The right side of the pond
Posts: 259
Re: Children In Home Country
Originally posted by robclews
Ok like some of you I guess, my children (twin boys of 16 and daughter 19) live with their mother in the UK, so that they can finish their schooling and college. My children come over on a regular basis and like me, are totally comfortable with the situation.
How do people here cope with the distance, and how do you make communication between you easier. Of course we all know only too well the benefit of internet chat....Arghhhhhhhhh that again, but in order to maintain the focus on being a parent, it can be difficult.
Does anyone have any good ideas, and do those in my position tend to be more lenient because they feel guilty about moving away. I am sure there are those who would critical of this situation and some who might like to label it as abandonment, bad parent all that crap, so if you feel like posting along those lines don’t bother lol
Rob
Ok like some of you I guess, my children (twin boys of 16 and daughter 19) live with their mother in the UK, so that they can finish their schooling and college. My children come over on a regular basis and like me, are totally comfortable with the situation.
How do people here cope with the distance, and how do you make communication between you easier. Of course we all know only too well the benefit of internet chat....Arghhhhhhhhh that again, but in order to maintain the focus on being a parent, it can be difficult.
Does anyone have any good ideas, and do those in my position tend to be more lenient because they feel guilty about moving away. I am sure there are those who would critical of this situation and some who might like to label it as abandonment, bad parent all that crap, so if you feel like posting along those lines don’t bother lol
Rob
Best wishes
Mr Pink
~and SecretGarden
~~day 141 NSC
