Struggling in Melbourne
Oct 10th 2007, 4:38 am
#16
Forum Regular
Thread Starter
Joined: Oct 2007
Location: B'ham-Melbourne-Sydney-B'ham
Posts: 104
Re: Struggling in Melbourne
Reading this makes me feel like you need to take 2 steps back in order to go 1 step forward.
Were in the same boat in Belgium. Can't wait to leave this place for OZ.
Before you pick up and go back home, try Qld.
Alot of people on here have difficulties in the first place they settle, and then love it somewhere else in oz.
G' luck
Were in the same boat in Belgium. Can't wait to leave this place for OZ.
Before you pick up and go back home, try Qld.
Alot of people on here have difficulties in the first place they settle, and then love it somewhere else in oz.
G' luck
Oct 12th 2007, 9:53 pm
#17
Just Joined
Joined: May 2007
Posts: 23
Re: Struggling in Melbourne
Happy4,
A lot depends on where you've settled. We rent in a VERY lush and posh area of Melbourne ( Hampton ) and the beach is at the bottom of the road. It has a lovely busy main street with good shops and gorgeous wide streets to walk the dog around and admire the beautiful houses here.
We cant afford to buy here and we've been looking EVERY weekend since we arrived 6 months ago.
The area has settled us slightly. It's not crazy busy and everthing's within walking distance. BUT, being unable to buy anything even NEAR this area has unsettled us to say the least. We ahve found house buying here to be a very difficult path and a frustrating and off putting one. Last week I even wanted to go home. This is not the life I imagined leading even although I've been here before. House hunting every weekend for nearly 7 months is not my idea of a "great lifestyle" and it has been dissapointing really.
Anyway, time will tell for us as we've just put yet another an offer in on a house. ( see my thread in The Barbie ) First offer was refused so waiting to hear if our increased offer will cut it.
What I'm trying to say is that I feel similar to you even though I LOVE Melbourne. It's just all the other "real" stuff which is spoiling our time here so far.
*pearly*
A lot depends on where you've settled. We rent in a VERY lush and posh area of Melbourne ( Hampton ) and the beach is at the bottom of the road. It has a lovely busy main street with good shops and gorgeous wide streets to walk the dog around and admire the beautiful houses here.
We cant afford to buy here and we've been looking EVERY weekend since we arrived 6 months ago.
The area has settled us slightly. It's not crazy busy and everthing's within walking distance. BUT, being unable to buy anything even NEAR this area has unsettled us to say the least. We ahve found house buying here to be a very difficult path and a frustrating and off putting one. Last week I even wanted to go home. This is not the life I imagined leading even although I've been here before. House hunting every weekend for nearly 7 months is not my idea of a "great lifestyle" and it has been dissapointing really.
Anyway, time will tell for us as we've just put yet another an offer in on a house. ( see my thread in The Barbie ) First offer was refused so waiting to hear if our increased offer will cut it.
What I'm trying to say is that I feel similar to you even though I LOVE Melbourne. It's just all the other "real" stuff which is spoiling our time here so far.
*pearly*
Chris & Elaine
Oct 13th 2007, 3:42 am
#18
Forum Regular
Thread Starter
Joined: Oct 2007
Location: B'ham-Melbourne-Sydney-B'ham
Posts: 104
Re: Struggling in Melbourne
You are moving to a lovely area, the girls will love it there, a stones throw from the beach, the area is very affluent, lots of lovely houses and generally nice friendly people, from our experiences. Brighton beach is quite a famous landmark, with the different colour beach huts there. Lovely beach area with rock pools, crabs etc. Nice walks, also are you into biking? You'll see alot of people riding around on their bikes there, hence lots of bike riding clubs to join and lots of safe tracks there. Also, there is a Boat Club in Brighton, you could join? You are next to St Kilda, quite an interesting place with lots of quirky shops, also Luna Park, a fair.
I think that once your girls start School, they will join after school groups, netball etc.. if thats what they like, so they will prob make friends quite quickly. During hols, Federation Square in the City is a good place for activities and children, all ages, lots of free concerts. Head down to the river there and you'll find 'Kid's Play', an arts and crafts centre, lots of fun, you have to book the arts and craft sessions. Museum in the City is a must too, as is the Zoo.
Here are some websites which may help;
www.melbourneschild.com.au
www.letsgokids.com.au
visitvictoria.com.au
Hope you have a successful transition period and all the best,
Ann
Oct 13th 2007, 9:47 am
#19
Forum Regular
Thread Starter
Joined: Oct 2007
Location: B'ham-Melbourne-Sydney-B'ham
Posts: 104
Re: Struggling in Melbourne
Have you thought about relocating further out of the city. There are fantastic little communities around - either further up the Bay or to the Hills (which probably wouldn't work for you, as you want a beach lifestyle!). Also depends how far your OH is prepared to travel for work.
Certainly, for me, being part of a small, established community has made all the difference and I have a great support network after a year.
Not sure that you would find this so easily in Perth - I think you'd have to avoid the new estates as, for me, they tend to be lacking in that community feel.
Rachel
Certainly, for me, being part of a small, established community has made all the difference and I have a great support network after a year.
Not sure that you would find this so easily in Perth - I think you'd have to avoid the new estates as, for me, they tend to be lacking in that community feel.
Rachel
Oct 15th 2007, 5:20 pm
#20
Forum Regular
Joined: Jan 2007
Location: Liverpool
Posts: 241
Re: Struggling in Melbourne
Thx so much Janet with your speedy reply! Just knowing someone has heard me does help! My daughter has a place at a community based Kinder for Jan, I hung on and found her a fantasic non profit place for 2 days a week, this coincides with my son attending his 4 yr old kinder programme. I am going to train as a swimming instructor to keep me busy! Thx again!
Oct 16th 2007, 12:43 am
#21
BE Enthusiast
Joined: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 510
Re: Struggling in Melbourne
Hi all, 
I am new to this site, only found it a week ago and already it has been a huge help and a great support! I have spent the last week reading various threads, nodding like a crazy person in agreement with some of the things written! Well, to start with, I'll fill you in on our background....
There are four of us, my husband, myself, our 4yr old son and our 2 yr old daughter. We arrived in Melbourne September 2006. OH is a Civil Engineer. He responded to an advert in 'The Construction News' in the UK in January 2006 and was interviewed in London. We came in on a 457 visa and OH's Company paid for our furniture to be shipped over, our flights and first 6 weeks accomodation, this was a huge help.
We felt this was an opportunity too good to pass by and had been looking in the last few years to live in Australia. (we've both been here before and live abroad b4 we had our children). We felt we wanted to give our children a much better life than they had in the UK in terms of outdoor activities, schooling, weather etc..Also, a main reason for coming was OH's working conditions in the Uk, he worked away from home alot and we wanted to have more quality of time together as a family.
So, off we went! I left behind a great support network of friends and family, as I'm sure alot of you did too! We brought my mum to help with the move. We arrived in Kew, to an apartment (nightmare) and then rushed into renting a bungalow with no garden, this was to get settled asap for the children, but in hindsight it was a huge mistake. We signed up for a year. OH got settled into work, normal hours for him, 7am till 6pm. These hours for me were easy to cope with in the UK as I had lots to do and plenty of people to see, but here, the days seemed very long.
I busied myself with playgrps etc but have to say, I longed for familiarity and routine. It was wonderful to have my mum with us but the downside was when she went home, I was extremely unhappy by Xmas 2006. As I had relied on her too much I was now facing an 8 week School holiday break with not having secured many new friends! I could see Melbourne is a stunning City, but day after day I was felling increasingly isolated and became very down. This surprised me and everyone who knows me alot as I am a 'can do' person. I went home in Jan 07 with our children for a good think. OH stayed here to hang onto his job and at least give us an opportunity to give it another go. This was hard on us all.
I returned to Melbourne with our children a month later. We moved to Coburg to a new house, supplied by OH's Company. Our son has a place at the local kinder, 3 afternoon's a week, I have joined the local leisure centre with a creche facility, we have joined a music group and swimming lessons, so in other words, I have given it my best shot! I don't give in easily!
Life here is OK but still a long way off from what I was expecting. I feel we have come a long way as a family and are extremely close, this has been the biggest plus to being here. Our children are happy and have been to 3 birthday parties so far. Plus I held a birthday party here for them as both born in Sept. Felt this was a good way to break the ice, so to say! But I haven't really made any 'friends' and haven't been out in months! The people are friendly enough but quite set up in what they do, I feel I can only do so much without appearing desperate! I am desperate! I can only take so much conversation from my son and daughter all day and some days, thats all who I talk to! Then I'm on the phone in the evening fighting back the tears! I'm beginning to think all this just isn't worth it afterall.
The parks are lovely, we have been to The Great Ocean Road, Mornington Peninsular, all the Tourist attractions and are heading to Brisbane for Christmas. I do think you have to give up alot, family, friends etc..to gain alot. Of course the lifestyle is better but I still am very unsettled. I'm not sure if this is due to the city we are in. Melbourne is a huge city and I do feel lost here. It's so busy! The beach lifestyle we so long for our children, I don't feel exists here.
We are 70% thinking of returning back to the UK. I feel extremely disappointed by this as our Australia journey has really taken all our energy and zest and it would be great to have achieved the lifestyle we set out to. I would like to know, has anyone else felt like this in Melbourne? I keep hearing Perth is a wonderful place to live. I think I would feel so much better if I felt I belonged in a community. We live in a very multicultural area and I do sometimes think I am back in Birmingham 'Balsall Heath' and Moseley(no offence Balsall Heath and Moseley!)! With not a beach in sight!
Yes, I will state the obvious, I am a whinging pom! But we are at a desperate point here, return to the UK or risk moving again here! Any help or guidance would be much appreciated, ta.
I am new to this site, only found it a week ago and already it has been a huge help and a great support! I have spent the last week reading various threads, nodding like a crazy person in agreement with some of the things written! Well, to start with, I'll fill you in on our background....
There are four of us, my husband, myself, our 4yr old son and our 2 yr old daughter. We arrived in Melbourne September 2006. OH is a Civil Engineer. He responded to an advert in 'The Construction News' in the UK in January 2006 and was interviewed in London. We came in on a 457 visa and OH's Company paid for our furniture to be shipped over, our flights and first 6 weeks accomodation, this was a huge help.
We felt this was an opportunity too good to pass by and had been looking in the last few years to live in Australia. (we've both been here before and live abroad b4 we had our children). We felt we wanted to give our children a much better life than they had in the UK in terms of outdoor activities, schooling, weather etc..Also, a main reason for coming was OH's working conditions in the Uk, he worked away from home alot and we wanted to have more quality of time together as a family.
So, off we went! I left behind a great support network of friends and family, as I'm sure alot of you did too! We brought my mum to help with the move. We arrived in Kew, to an apartment (nightmare) and then rushed into renting a bungalow with no garden, this was to get settled asap for the children, but in hindsight it was a huge mistake. We signed up for a year. OH got settled into work, normal hours for him, 7am till 6pm. These hours for me were easy to cope with in the UK as I had lots to do and plenty of people to see, but here, the days seemed very long.
I busied myself with playgrps etc but have to say, I longed for familiarity and routine. It was wonderful to have my mum with us but the downside was when she went home, I was extremely unhappy by Xmas 2006. As I had relied on her too much I was now facing an 8 week School holiday break with not having secured many new friends! I could see Melbourne is a stunning City, but day after day I was felling increasingly isolated and became very down. This surprised me and everyone who knows me alot as I am a 'can do' person. I went home in Jan 07 with our children for a good think. OH stayed here to hang onto his job and at least give us an opportunity to give it another go. This was hard on us all.
I returned to Melbourne with our children a month later. We moved to Coburg to a new house, supplied by OH's Company. Our son has a place at the local kinder, 3 afternoon's a week, I have joined the local leisure centre with a creche facility, we have joined a music group and swimming lessons, so in other words, I have given it my best shot! I don't give in easily!
Life here is OK but still a long way off from what I was expecting. I feel we have come a long way as a family and are extremely close, this has been the biggest plus to being here. Our children are happy and have been to 3 birthday parties so far. Plus I held a birthday party here for them as both born in Sept. Felt this was a good way to break the ice, so to say! But I haven't really made any 'friends' and haven't been out in months! The people are friendly enough but quite set up in what they do, I feel I can only do so much without appearing desperate! I am desperate! I can only take so much conversation from my son and daughter all day and some days, thats all who I talk to! Then I'm on the phone in the evening fighting back the tears! I'm beginning to think all this just isn't worth it afterall.
The parks are lovely, we have been to The Great Ocean Road, Mornington Peninsular, all the Tourist attractions and are heading to Brisbane for Christmas. I do think you have to give up alot, family, friends etc..to gain alot. Of course the lifestyle is better but I still am very unsettled. I'm not sure if this is due to the city we are in. Melbourne is a huge city and I do feel lost here. It's so busy! The beach lifestyle we so long for our children, I don't feel exists here.
We are 70% thinking of returning back to the UK. I feel extremely disappointed by this as our Australia journey has really taken all our energy and zest and it would be great to have achieved the lifestyle we set out to. I would like to know, has anyone else felt like this in Melbourne? I keep hearing Perth is a wonderful place to live. I think I would feel so much better if I felt I belonged in a community. We live in a very multicultural area and I do sometimes think I am back in Birmingham 'Balsall Heath' and Moseley(no offence Balsall Heath and Moseley!)! With not a beach in sight!
Yes, I will state the obvious, I am a whinging pom! But we are at a desperate point here, return to the UK or risk moving again here! Any help or guidance would be much appreciated, ta.
thank you for your wonderful post. I think it's great that you are being honest and I don't think you are whinging at all.
Australia is a huge country that is extremely diverse. If you don't have the beach lifestyle that you dreamt of, then I would advise that you try living in another area or state, and giving it another go before going back to the U.K. You've come all this way and invested your time, money, and emotion in being here..One of the beauties of Australia is that if you are not happy in the place you are in...you can relocate to a completely different place, with a different climate, different types of people, different countryside, everything! I think there's an ideal place waiting for you and your family..you just gotta find it and don't give up! Put out some positive vibes out there..make it happen for yourselves. All the best with it,
Love Vegemite.
Oct 16th 2007, 1:16 am
#22
BE Enthusiast
Joined: Jun 2007
Location: where else but Queensland
Posts: 474
Re: Struggling in Melbourne
Hi all,
I am new to this site, only found it a week ago and already it has been a huge help and a great support! I have spent the last week reading various threads, nodding like a crazy person in agreement with some of the things written! Well, to start with, I'll fill you in on our background....
There are four of us, my husband, myself, our 4yr old son and our 2 yr old daughter. We arrived in Melbourne September 2006. OH is a Civil Engineer. He responded to an advert in 'The Construction News' in the UK in January 2006 and was interviewed in London. We came in on a 457 visa and OH's Company paid for our furniture to be shipped over, our flights and first 6 weeks accomodation, this was a huge help.
We felt this was an opportunity too good to pass by and had been looking in the last few years to live in Australia. (we've both been here before and live abroad b4 we had our children). We felt we wanted to give our children a much better life than they had in the UK in terms of outdoor activities, schooling, weather etc..Also, a main reason for coming was OH's working conditions in the Uk, he worked away from home alot and we wanted to have more quality of time together as a family.
So, off we went! I left behind a great support network of friends and family, as I'm sure alot of you did too! We brought my mum to help with the move. We arrived in Kew, to an apartment (nightmare) and then rushed into renting a bungalow with no garden, this was to get settled asap for the children, but in hindsight it was a huge mistake. We signed up for a year. OH got settled into work, normal hours for him, 7am till 6pm. These hours for me were easy to cope with in the UK as I had lots to do and plenty of people to see, but here, the days seemed very long.
I busied myself with playgrps etc but have to say, I longed for familiarity and routine. It was wonderful to have my mum with us but the downside was when she went home, I was extremely unhappy by Xmas 2006. As I had relied on her too much I was now facing an 8 week School holiday break with not having secured many new friends! I could see Melbourne is a stunning City, but day after day I was felling increasingly isolated and became very down. This surprised me and everyone who knows me alot as I am a 'can do' person. I went home in Jan 07 with our children for a good think. OH stayed here to hang onto his job and at least give us an opportunity to give it another go. This was hard on us all.
I returned to Melbourne with our children a month later. We moved to Coburg to a new house, supplied by OH's Company. Our son has a place at the local kinder, 3 afternoon's a week, I have joined the local leisure centre with a creche facility, we have joined a music group and swimming lessons, so in other words, I have given it my best shot! I don't give in easily!
Life here is OK but still a long way off from what I was expecting. I feel we have come a long way as a family and are extremely close, this has been the biggest plus to being here. Our children are happy and have been to 3 birthday parties so far. Plus I held a birthday party here for them as both born in Sept. Felt this was a good way to break the ice, so to say! But I haven't really made any 'friends' and haven't been out in months! The people are friendly enough but quite set up in what they do, I feel I can only do so much without appearing desperate! I am desperate! I can only take so much conversation from my son and daughter all day and some days, thats all who I talk to! Then I'm on the phone in the evening fighting back the tears! I'm beginning to think all this just isn't worth it afterall.
The parks are lovely, we have been to The Great Ocean Road, Mornington Peninsular, all the Tourist attractions and are heading to Brisbane for Christmas. I do think you have to give up alot, family, friends etc..to gain alot. Of course the lifestyle is better but I still am very unsettled. I'm not sure if this is due to the city we are in. Melbourne is a huge city and I do feel lost here. It's so busy! The beach lifestyle we so long for our children, I don't feel exists here.
We are 70% thinking of returning back to the UK. I feel extremely disappointed by this as our Australia journey has really taken all our energy and zest and it would be great to have achieved the lifestyle we set out to. I would like to know, has anyone else felt like this in Melbourne? I keep hearing Perth is a wonderful place to live. I think I would feel so much better if I felt I belonged in a community. We live in a very multicultural area and I do sometimes think I am back in Birmingham 'Balsall Heath' and Moseley(no offence Balsall Heath and Moseley!)! With not a beach in sight!
Yes, I will state the obvious, I am a whinging pom! But we are at a desperate point here, return to the UK or risk moving again here! Any help or guidance would be much appreciated, ta.
I am new to this site, only found it a week ago and already it has been a huge help and a great support! I have spent the last week reading various threads, nodding like a crazy person in agreement with some of the things written! Well, to start with, I'll fill you in on our background....
There are four of us, my husband, myself, our 4yr old son and our 2 yr old daughter. We arrived in Melbourne September 2006. OH is a Civil Engineer. He responded to an advert in 'The Construction News' in the UK in January 2006 and was interviewed in London. We came in on a 457 visa and OH's Company paid for our furniture to be shipped over, our flights and first 6 weeks accomodation, this was a huge help.
We felt this was an opportunity too good to pass by and had been looking in the last few years to live in Australia. (we've both been here before and live abroad b4 we had our children). We felt we wanted to give our children a much better life than they had in the UK in terms of outdoor activities, schooling, weather etc..Also, a main reason for coming was OH's working conditions in the Uk, he worked away from home alot and we wanted to have more quality of time together as a family.
So, off we went! I left behind a great support network of friends and family, as I'm sure alot of you did too! We brought my mum to help with the move. We arrived in Kew, to an apartment (nightmare) and then rushed into renting a bungalow with no garden, this was to get settled asap for the children, but in hindsight it was a huge mistake. We signed up for a year. OH got settled into work, normal hours for him, 7am till 6pm. These hours for me were easy to cope with in the UK as I had lots to do and plenty of people to see, but here, the days seemed very long.
I busied myself with playgrps etc but have to say, I longed for familiarity and routine. It was wonderful to have my mum with us but the downside was when she went home, I was extremely unhappy by Xmas 2006. As I had relied on her too much I was now facing an 8 week School holiday break with not having secured many new friends! I could see Melbourne is a stunning City, but day after day I was felling increasingly isolated and became very down. This surprised me and everyone who knows me alot as I am a 'can do' person. I went home in Jan 07 with our children for a good think. OH stayed here to hang onto his job and at least give us an opportunity to give it another go. This was hard on us all.
I returned to Melbourne with our children a month later. We moved to Coburg to a new house, supplied by OH's Company. Our son has a place at the local kinder, 3 afternoon's a week, I have joined the local leisure centre with a creche facility, we have joined a music group and swimming lessons, so in other words, I have given it my best shot! I don't give in easily!
Life here is OK but still a long way off from what I was expecting. I feel we have come a long way as a family and are extremely close, this has been the biggest plus to being here. Our children are happy and have been to 3 birthday parties so far. Plus I held a birthday party here for them as both born in Sept. Felt this was a good way to break the ice, so to say! But I haven't really made any 'friends' and haven't been out in months! The people are friendly enough but quite set up in what they do, I feel I can only do so much without appearing desperate! I am desperate! I can only take so much conversation from my son and daughter all day and some days, thats all who I talk to! Then I'm on the phone in the evening fighting back the tears! I'm beginning to think all this just isn't worth it afterall.
The parks are lovely, we have been to The Great Ocean Road, Mornington Peninsular, all the Tourist attractions and are heading to Brisbane for Christmas. I do think you have to give up alot, family, friends etc..to gain alot. Of course the lifestyle is better but I still am very unsettled. I'm not sure if this is due to the city we are in. Melbourne is a huge city and I do feel lost here. It's so busy! The beach lifestyle we so long for our children, I don't feel exists here.
We are 70% thinking of returning back to the UK. I feel extremely disappointed by this as our Australia journey has really taken all our energy and zest and it would be great to have achieved the lifestyle we set out to. I would like to know, has anyone else felt like this in Melbourne? I keep hearing Perth is a wonderful place to live. I think I would feel so much better if I felt I belonged in a community. We live in a very multicultural area and I do sometimes think I am back in Birmingham 'Balsall Heath' and Moseley(no offence Balsall Heath and Moseley!)! With not a beach in sight!
Yes, I will state the obvious, I am a whinging pom! But we are at a desperate point here, return to the UK or risk moving again here! Any help or guidance would be much appreciated, ta.
Maybe a relocation to Sydney and the beaches will help, but the only thing I can say - and I think the one thing people underestimate when they come here is that - it takes time. A long time. Don't imagine you can simply recreate you life in UK in an instant (as far as friends etc., go).
It was 8 weeks before I got to speak to anyone other than shop assistants or real estate agents and 6 months before I had a coffee with someone, but I didn't expect it to be any other way.
Try and focus on what it is you really want and take tiny steps each day towards that.
Best of luck
Gilly
Oct 16th 2007, 1:37 am
#23
Just Joined
Joined: Sep 2007
Location: Castlemaine, VIC
Posts: 8
Re: Struggling in Melbourne
I would second that! I've been here in VIC 18 months now and still struggle sometimes. But I don't see how you can move to the other side of the world and NOT have periods of feeling very unsettled. I've been lucky in that there have been more ups than downs................but some days it can feel very overwhelming, especially when you can't just turn to your old support network - cos they're all back in the UK!
Oct 16th 2007, 5:56 am
#24
Forum Regular
Joined: Dec 2003
Location: Mt. Gambier, South Australia
Posts: 130
Re: Struggling in Melbourne
It was 8 weeks before I got to speak to anyone other than shop assistants or real estate agents and 6 months before I had a coffee with someone, but I didn't expect it to be any other way.
Try and focus on what it is you really want and take tiny steps each day towards that.
Best of luck
Gilly
Try and focus on what it is you really want and take tiny steps each day towards that.
Best of luck
Gilly
That's how I feel at the moment. I only talk to shop assistants and we were invited out for a meal - by our real estate agent, but in fairness she is becoming a friend.
I'm going to investigate the local skilled migrants centre since they have a welcome programme.
Karen
Oct 16th 2007, 5:59 am
#25
Forum Regular
Joined: Dec 2003
Location: Mt. Gambier, South Australia
Posts: 130
Re: Struggling in Melbourne
Happy4,
It will work out and while both of us have this forum we know that others are going through or have been through exactly the same thing!
I'm volunteering for stuff at the local migrant centre. Firstly they want an English recipe for their newsletter, and also why we moved to Mount Gambier. It was great to talk to women who weren't trying to sell me something
Good luck!
Karen
It will work out and while both of us have this forum we know that others are going through or have been through exactly the same thing!
I'm volunteering for stuff at the local migrant centre. Firstly they want an English recipe for their newsletter, and also why we moved to Mount Gambier. It was great to talk to women who weren't trying to sell me something
Good luck!
Karen
Oct 16th 2007, 11:07 am
#26
BE Enthusiast
Joined: Oct 2006
Location: OZ - UK - its hard being a ping pong!
Posts: 312
Re: Struggling in Melbourne
Hi Chris and Elaine
You are moving to a lovely area, the girls will love it there, a stones throw from the beach, the area is very affluent, lots of lovely houses and generally nice friendly people, from our experiences. Brighton beach is quite a famous landmark, with the different colour beach huts there. Lovely beach area with rock pools, crabs etc. Nice walks, also are you into biking? You'll see alot of people riding around on their bikes there, hence lots of bike riding clubs to join and lots of safe tracks there. Also, there is a Boat Club in Brighton, you could join? You are next to St Kilda, quite an interesting place with lots of quirky shops, also Luna Park, a fair.
I think that once your girls start School, they will join after school groups, netball etc.. if thats what they like, so they will prob make friends quite quickly. During hols, Federation Square in the City is a good place for activities and children, all ages, lots of free concerts. Head down to the river there and you'll find 'Kid's Play', an arts and crafts centre, lots of fun, you have to book the arts and craft sessions. Museum in the City is a must too, as is the Zoo.
Here are some websites which may help;
www.melbourneschild.com.au
www.letsgokids.com.au
visitvictoria.com.au
Hope you have a successful transition period and all the best,
Ann
You are moving to a lovely area, the girls will love it there, a stones throw from the beach, the area is very affluent, lots of lovely houses and generally nice friendly people, from our experiences. Brighton beach is quite a famous landmark, with the different colour beach huts there. Lovely beach area with rock pools, crabs etc. Nice walks, also are you into biking? You'll see alot of people riding around on their bikes there, hence lots of bike riding clubs to join and lots of safe tracks there. Also, there is a Boat Club in Brighton, you could join? You are next to St Kilda, quite an interesting place with lots of quirky shops, also Luna Park, a fair.
I think that once your girls start School, they will join after school groups, netball etc.. if thats what they like, so they will prob make friends quite quickly. During hols, Federation Square in the City is a good place for activities and children, all ages, lots of free concerts. Head down to the river there and you'll find 'Kid's Play', an arts and crafts centre, lots of fun, you have to book the arts and craft sessions. Museum in the City is a must too, as is the Zoo.
Here are some websites which may help;
www.melbourneschild.com.au
www.letsgokids.com.au
visitvictoria.com.au
Hope you have a successful transition period and all the best,
Ann
What a great post, it is what I am fearing . We are moving to Melbourne and have two young children and I am worried about areas and will I feel really alone. I hope you make ago and your not alone
Good Luck, Esther
Oct 17th 2007, 10:09 am
#27
Forum Regular
Thread Starter
Joined: Oct 2007
Location: B'ham-Melbourne-Sydney-B'ham
Posts: 104
Re: Struggling in Melbourne
Oct 17th 2007, 11:09 am
#28
Forum Regular
Joined: Oct 2007
Posts: 31
Re: Struggling in Melbourne
Hi
Have just read your message, and yu seem to have a lot of replies and advice already. Mine is more of a 'you are not alone' message, because I am not an ex-pat right now, but have been. To cut a long story short, when my twins were two years old, my ex-husband (the 'ex' is relevant here!) moved to Florida for his new job as a maritime engineer. I felt exactly the same way as you: new way of life for us and the boys in a better place, more time together, more money etc etc. It seemed a perfect life. How wrong I was... Within 3 months, he had been moved to Panama in Central America, I was left in Tampa to bring up the boys with no support network whatsoever. They saw their dad every few weeks, I slowly slipped into depression, and drank way too much on my own, as I only knew one other family whom we had met in the apartment complex when we first arrived. I clung to them like something possessed as I had no other source of life at that time. They were my adoptive family, friends, and husband all rolled into one.
Well, needless to say, the marriage fell apart as the husband did not want to know that I was so miserable left on my own with two two-year olds in a foreign country.
I know exactly how you feel and where you are coming from. I am such a strong person and a 'go getter' normally, but I felt such an utter failure that I couldn't make it work, and my mother couldn't understand why I wanted to come back to the UK when I had a big house and the sun in Florida... I guess you just have to have been through it yourself to understand.
Good luck with your adventure - I do hope yours works out better than mine and that you have a hubby who understands and works it out with you. There are lots of solutions and alternatives to coming home - you just have to find them and figure out what will work for your family.
BEXTER
Have just read your message, and yu seem to have a lot of replies and advice already. Mine is more of a 'you are not alone' message, because I am not an ex-pat right now, but have been. To cut a long story short, when my twins were two years old, my ex-husband (the 'ex' is relevant here!) moved to Florida for his new job as a maritime engineer. I felt exactly the same way as you: new way of life for us and the boys in a better place, more time together, more money etc etc. It seemed a perfect life. How wrong I was... Within 3 months, he had been moved to Panama in Central America, I was left in Tampa to bring up the boys with no support network whatsoever. They saw their dad every few weeks, I slowly slipped into depression, and drank way too much on my own, as I only knew one other family whom we had met in the apartment complex when we first arrived. I clung to them like something possessed as I had no other source of life at that time. They were my adoptive family, friends, and husband all rolled into one.
Well, needless to say, the marriage fell apart as the husband did not want to know that I was so miserable left on my own with two two-year olds in a foreign country.
I know exactly how you feel and where you are coming from. I am such a strong person and a 'go getter' normally, but I felt such an utter failure that I couldn't make it work, and my mother couldn't understand why I wanted to come back to the UK when I had a big house and the sun in Florida... I guess you just have to have been through it yourself to understand.
Good luck with your adventure - I do hope yours works out better than mine and that you have a hubby who understands and works it out with you. There are lots of solutions and alternatives to coming home - you just have to find them and figure out what will work for your family.
BEXTER
Oct 17th 2007, 11:27 am
#29
Just Joined
Joined: Sep 2006
Location: Adelaide
Posts: 8
Re: Struggling in Melbourne
Hey, I can relate to many of your feelings. When we came out we felt like returning to the UK for 18 months before moving interstate (Adelaide - Brisbane) we were very envious of people that were positive about having moved here. We didnt want to return to the UK only to have people say "you didnt give it a chance" Once we were in Brisbane we quickly realised we didn't want to call that home (each to their own).
Now were in BNE not happy, been in Adelaide and werent happy there - what to do next?
We decided to head off to the UK for a holiday before making the move back. We were in the UK for four weeks and all that trip managed to do was confuse us further because it re-inforced all the reasons for leaving in the first place.
So back to Brisbane we went and took an opportunity to return to Adelaide. Well all of a sudden we got this overwellming feeling of "coming home" and finally settled. Once you have made the move, I think you have to accept that you will always look back and wonder what if!!
We looked at a job that would have taken us back to the Uk last year for a contract period of 5 years(and to our home town). I can honestly say I'm glad we didn't do it. I hope you manage to experience the feeling we eventually found. My honest opinion is go for a holiday and have a good look at the UK again. Australia realy isn't as bad as you may be feeling when your at a low.
Cheers for now Delboy
Now were in BNE not happy, been in Adelaide and werent happy there - what to do next?
We decided to head off to the UK for a holiday before making the move back. We were in the UK for four weeks and all that trip managed to do was confuse us further because it re-inforced all the reasons for leaving in the first place.
So back to Brisbane we went and took an opportunity to return to Adelaide. Well all of a sudden we got this overwellming feeling of "coming home" and finally settled. Once you have made the move, I think you have to accept that you will always look back and wonder what if!!
We looked at a job that would have taken us back to the Uk last year for a contract period of 5 years(and to our home town). I can honestly say I'm glad we didn't do it. I hope you manage to experience the feeling we eventually found. My honest opinion is go for a holiday and have a good look at the UK again. Australia realy isn't as bad as you may be feeling when your at a low.
Cheers for now Delboy
Oct 17th 2007, 11:30 am
#30
BE Enthusiast
Joined: Jun 2007
Location: Northern Ireland (norn iron)
Posts: 310
Re: Struggling in Melbourne
I've just read your post, and although we are at the visa stage of the application, I worry every day if I will settle.
My husband assures me that after 3 years if one of us isn't happy we can return home, we have four kids, from aged 7 down to 11 months.
I think maybe it was a bad idea to bring your mum with you at the beginning, because the reality would have set in a lot quicker and then when she came to visit, it may have settled you a bit, rather than having to return back.
I think the swimming course is a great idea, to give you a separate focus and hopefully meet new people.
I sincerely hope you can overcome the homesickness and settle into enjoying life properly again. I don't really have a support network of help here for the kids etc, even though my family are close by, they don't help out. I always have to pay someone, which is a good thing in helping me relocate.
Who knows in 6 months another unsettled pom will be posting a thread and you can reply that you know how they feel, but you've made friends and are enjoying your experience.
We pass this way but once,
Lynne
My husband assures me that after 3 years if one of us isn't happy we can return home, we have four kids, from aged 7 down to 11 months.
I think maybe it was a bad idea to bring your mum with you at the beginning, because the reality would have set in a lot quicker and then when she came to visit, it may have settled you a bit, rather than having to return back.
I think the swimming course is a great idea, to give you a separate focus and hopefully meet new people.
I sincerely hope you can overcome the homesickness and settle into enjoying life properly again. I don't really have a support network of help here for the kids etc, even though my family are close by, they don't help out. I always have to pay someone, which is a good thing in helping me relocate.
Who knows in 6 months another unsettled pom will be posting a thread and you can reply that you know how they feel, but you've made friends and are enjoying your experience.
We pass this way but once,
Lynne