S.African doing SA-NZ-SA-?OZ?
Apr 24th 2008, 11:24 am
#1
Just Joined
Thread Starter
Joined: Apr 2008
Location: Johannesburg, South Africa
Posts: 13
S.African doing SA-NZ-SA-?OZ?
Hi everyone
This is not a post particularly about OZ, but just to share what we've been through and the fact that we went to NZ and back and now perhaps to OZ..
We left for NZ in 2006 - (OZ was first choice but at that time NZ was our only option) I flew over BY MYSELF with a 6 WEEK old baby and a 3 yr old daughter - I've just had a ceasarean. Truth be told, the stress and adrenaline took me right through everything and onto the plane, but when I actually stepped onto the plane and saw my seat - where I was going to have to sit and endure an endless flight with two very small children all by myself - it took every bit of courage I have ever had to stay on that plane on not run down the steps again. I still remember that feeling like it was yesterday.
My husband was already there and had found a good job in Auckland. I had my daughter baptised in SA very rushed before my husband left for NZ.
At first we stayed with distant family - which was difficult. Then moved into a studio flat - my 3 yr old daughter had to bath in a plastic baby bath in the shower - as the flat had not bath! It was pretty much a kitchen, bedroom and dining room in one... then only once the work permit was sorted did we start looking for a rental.
We found a lovely rental, and moved in - camped - rented a fridge, tv, washing machine, dryer and slept on the floor - not fun waking up in the middle of the night with a newborn and really having no comforts from home!
I was sick all the time - the new bugs in the air really hit me and it was horrible having to get up in the mornings whilst being so tired and sick that I just wanted to die, but I had two children who depended on me. I was climbing the walls and could've easily drowned in depression from staying at home with a very difficult baby and 3 yr old and not having any contact with the outside world.
Made a few friends, also joined the church, but nothing could bring back the comfort of having my mom around to help with the kids..
Just as bad was the fact that I would gain the courage to venture outside with the two girls, and after taking about 25 minutes just to gear up for the weather outside, I was ready to just call it a day and not go out at all.
A real dissapointment for me was when September came round and I did what I always do in South Africa when September comes up - I unpack all the summer clothes, swimming towels and sunscreen, take out all the summer sheets, and generally get ready for a 'typical South African' summer! Much to my utter dissapointment, Spring was even worse than Winter! Then, my husband woke me up one morning to tell me that my beloved dog (that we left with my parents) had died - he just knew he couldn't leave me alone that day and took the day off work.
But we drove around alot and saw some beautiful scenery - it's a beautiful country, I had fun going into the city on a Saturday night with the ferry and going to watch the Symphony Orchestra (yes, I know, I'm strange like that
)
I took photos of everything and we really did see beautiful and interesting things..
My husband was not ecstatically happy there, but he would've stayed if I was fine.. eventually decided that i would come back by myself for a holiday to visit the family.. but deep in my heart I knew I was coming back for good.
I couldn't face flying by myself again, so my dear husband paid for a ticket for himself, and took only about 3 days leave or something ridiculous just so he could fly back with me and hop right back on a plane again to come and sort things out on NZ side.
Very unselfish of him and he never blamed me for not being able to 'make it' on that side... he also hated the weather
Was glad to be back in SA, and we worked really hard to get back on our feet - and our life's pretty much back to where it was before we left.
Needless to say, nothing's changed in SA and in fact it might have gotten worse - but very early on we already started talking about going to OZ - however, this time learning from some of our mistakes and hopefully making wiser decisions and being more patient.
It was really 'daft' to go with a 6 week old baby - especially someone like me who cannot be left alone in a house all day with small children without having some form of help
We now will wait until the youngest one is at school going age so that I can afford to work part time - it can be an important way of getting to know people and feeling like you are contributing to something..
Like many others, we went with preconceived ideas about what it was going to be like there (especially about the weather) and I was so dissapointed! If I can afford it, I will go for a LSD trip to OZ, but from what I've seen, some of it looks very similar to NZ so I know what to expect when it comes to housing, general look of suburbs etc.
This time, I'm not in a rush - I'm happy (though not safe) in my house and I am thoroughly enjoying seeing my family and friends and being with my father who is very ill.
So, if it takes 2 years to get there, no probs (I can only pray we are safe until then) - it's good knowing you are going, without the frantic rush and stress that goes with it, so I appreciate every breakfast I have at Wimpy and every beautiful winter's day and every time I can pick up the phone to just ask my mom something quickly without having to wait for her to wake up on the other side of the world.
I suppose in a very long winded way I am trying to say don't beat yourself up if you're not happy - it's not the end of the world to go back and forth - I think as long as you respect your partner, your children and try and make wise decisions, you are allowed to make the 'wrong move' and then try again in another direction.
We feel good about our experience in NZ and I can say a lot of good things about the place too, I don't regret going (except maybe financially:curse:- we've learnt alot about what it involves to emmigrate and how different another continent can really be despite all the similarities people say there are.
Do what makes you happy - you have only one life and you deserve to enjoy it - all the way to the grave - just have respect for yourself, your family and children and consider them in your decisions, but other than that, enjoy it!!
Wow, I've finally gotten that all off my chest - feels good.
Thanks!
This is not a post particularly about OZ, but just to share what we've been through and the fact that we went to NZ and back and now perhaps to OZ..
We left for NZ in 2006 - (OZ was first choice but at that time NZ was our only option) I flew over BY MYSELF with a 6 WEEK old baby and a 3 yr old daughter - I've just had a ceasarean. Truth be told, the stress and adrenaline took me right through everything and onto the plane, but when I actually stepped onto the plane and saw my seat - where I was going to have to sit and endure an endless flight with two very small children all by myself - it took every bit of courage I have ever had to stay on that plane on not run down the steps again. I still remember that feeling like it was yesterday.
My husband was already there and had found a good job in Auckland. I had my daughter baptised in SA very rushed before my husband left for NZ.
At first we stayed with distant family - which was difficult. Then moved into a studio flat - my 3 yr old daughter had to bath in a plastic baby bath in the shower - as the flat had not bath! It was pretty much a kitchen, bedroom and dining room in one... then only once the work permit was sorted did we start looking for a rental.
We found a lovely rental, and moved in - camped - rented a fridge, tv, washing machine, dryer and slept on the floor - not fun waking up in the middle of the night with a newborn and really having no comforts from home!
I was sick all the time - the new bugs in the air really hit me and it was horrible having to get up in the mornings whilst being so tired and sick that I just wanted to die, but I had two children who depended on me. I was climbing the walls and could've easily drowned in depression from staying at home with a very difficult baby and 3 yr old and not having any contact with the outside world.
Made a few friends, also joined the church, but nothing could bring back the comfort of having my mom around to help with the kids..
Just as bad was the fact that I would gain the courage to venture outside with the two girls, and after taking about 25 minutes just to gear up for the weather outside, I was ready to just call it a day and not go out at all.
A real dissapointment for me was when September came round and I did what I always do in South Africa when September comes up - I unpack all the summer clothes, swimming towels and sunscreen, take out all the summer sheets, and generally get ready for a 'typical South African' summer! Much to my utter dissapointment, Spring was even worse than Winter! Then, my husband woke me up one morning to tell me that my beloved dog (that we left with my parents) had died - he just knew he couldn't leave me alone that day and took the day off work.
But we drove around alot and saw some beautiful scenery - it's a beautiful country, I had fun going into the city on a Saturday night with the ferry and going to watch the Symphony Orchestra (yes, I know, I'm strange like that
)I took photos of everything and we really did see beautiful and interesting things..
My husband was not ecstatically happy there, but he would've stayed if I was fine.. eventually decided that i would come back by myself for a holiday to visit the family.. but deep in my heart I knew I was coming back for good.
I couldn't face flying by myself again, so my dear husband paid for a ticket for himself, and took only about 3 days leave or something ridiculous just so he could fly back with me and hop right back on a plane again to come and sort things out on NZ side.
Very unselfish of him and he never blamed me for not being able to 'make it' on that side... he also hated the weather
Was glad to be back in SA, and we worked really hard to get back on our feet - and our life's pretty much back to where it was before we left.
Needless to say, nothing's changed in SA and in fact it might have gotten worse - but very early on we already started talking about going to OZ - however, this time learning from some of our mistakes and hopefully making wiser decisions and being more patient.
It was really 'daft' to go with a 6 week old baby - especially someone like me who cannot be left alone in a house all day with small children without having some form of help
We now will wait until the youngest one is at school going age so that I can afford to work part time - it can be an important way of getting to know people and feeling like you are contributing to something..
Like many others, we went with preconceived ideas about what it was going to be like there (especially about the weather) and I was so dissapointed! If I can afford it, I will go for a LSD trip to OZ, but from what I've seen, some of it looks very similar to NZ so I know what to expect when it comes to housing, general look of suburbs etc.
This time, I'm not in a rush - I'm happy (though not safe) in my house and I am thoroughly enjoying seeing my family and friends and being with my father who is very ill.
So, if it takes 2 years to get there, no probs (I can only pray we are safe until then) - it's good knowing you are going, without the frantic rush and stress that goes with it, so I appreciate every breakfast I have at Wimpy and every beautiful winter's day and every time I can pick up the phone to just ask my mom something quickly without having to wait for her to wake up on the other side of the world.
I suppose in a very long winded way I am trying to say don't beat yourself up if you're not happy - it's not the end of the world to go back and forth - I think as long as you respect your partner, your children and try and make wise decisions, you are allowed to make the 'wrong move' and then try again in another direction.
We feel good about our experience in NZ and I can say a lot of good things about the place too, I don't regret going (except maybe financially:curse:- we've learnt alot about what it involves to emmigrate and how different another continent can really be despite all the similarities people say there are.
Do what makes you happy - you have only one life and you deserve to enjoy it - all the way to the grave - just have respect for yourself, your family and children and consider them in your decisions, but other than that, enjoy it!!
Wow, I've finally gotten that all off my chest - feels good.
Thanks!
Apr 24th 2008, 5:57 pm
#2
BE Enthusiast
Joined: Nov 2005
Location: Brisbane
Posts: 413
Re: S.African doing SA-NZ-SA-?OZ?
Hi everyone
This is not a post particularly about OZ, but just to share what we've been through and the fact that we went to NZ and back and now perhaps to OZ..
We left for NZ in 2006 - (OZ was first choice but at that time NZ was our only option) I flew over BY MYSELF with a 6 WEEK old baby and a 3 yr old daughter - I've just had a ceasarean. Truth be told, the stress and adrenaline took me right through everything and onto the plane, but when I actually stepped onto the plane and saw my seat - where I was going to have to sit and endure an endless flight with two very small children all by myself - it took every bit of courage I have ever had to stay on that plane on not run down the steps again. I still remember that feeling like it was yesterday.
My husband was already there and had found a good job in Auckland. I had my daughter baptised in SA very rushed before my husband left for NZ.
At first we stayed with distant family - which was difficult. Then moved into a studio flat - my 3 yr old daughter had to bath in a plastic baby bath in the shower - as the flat had not bath! It was pretty much a kitchen, bedroom and dining room in one... then only once the work permit was sorted did we start looking for a rental.
We found a lovely rental, and moved in - camped - rented a fridge, tv, washing machine, dryer and slept on the floor - not fun waking up in the middle of the night with a newborn and really having no comforts from home!
I was sick all the time - the new bugs in the air really hit me and it was horrible having to get up in the mornings whilst being so tired and sick that I just wanted to die, but I had two children who depended on me. I was climbing the walls and could've easily drowned in depression from staying at home with a very difficult baby and 3 yr old and not having any contact with the outside world.
Made a few friends, also joined the church, but nothing could bring back the comfort of having my mom around to help with the kids..
Just as bad was the fact that I would gain the courage to venture outside with the two girls, and after taking about 25 minutes just to gear up for the weather outside, I was ready to just call it a day and not go out at all.
A real dissapointment for me was when September came round and I did what I always do in South Africa when September comes up - I unpack all the summer clothes, swimming towels and sunscreen, take out all the summer sheets, and generally get ready for a 'typical South African' summer! Much to my utter dissapointment, Spring was even worse than Winter! Then, my husband woke me up one morning to tell me that my beloved dog (that we left with my parents) had died - he just knew he couldn't leave me alone that day and took the day off work.
But we drove around alot and saw some beautiful scenery - it's a beautiful country, I had fun going into the city on a Saturday night with the ferry and going to watch the Symphony Orchestra (yes, I know, I'm strange like that)
I took photos of everything and we really did see beautiful and interesting things..
My husband was not ecstatically happy there, but he would've stayed if I was fine.. eventually decided that i would come back by myself for a holiday to visit the family.. but deep in my heart I knew I was coming back for good.
I couldn't face flying by myself again, so my dear husband paid for a ticket for himself, and took only about 3 days leave or something ridiculous just so he could fly back with me and hop right back on a plane again to come and sort things out on NZ side.
Very unselfish of him and he never blamed me for not being able to 'make it' on that side... he also hated the weather
Was glad to be back in SA, and we worked really hard to get back on our feet - and our life's pretty much back to where it was before we left.
Needless to say, nothing's changed in SA and in fact it might have gotten worse - but very early on we already started talking about going to OZ - however, this time learning from some of our mistakes and hopefully making wiser decisions and being more patient.
It was really 'daft' to go with a 6 week old baby - especially someone like me who cannot be left alone in a house all day with small children without having some form of help
We now will wait until the youngest one is at school going age so that I can afford to work part time - it can be an important way of getting to know people and feeling like you are contributing to something..
Like many others, we went with preconceived ideas about what it was going to be like there (especially about the weather) and I was so dissapointed! If I can afford it, I will go for a LSD trip to OZ, but from what I've seen, some of it looks very similar to NZ so I know what to expect when it comes to housing, general look of suburbs etc.
This time, I'm not in a rush - I'm happy (though not safe) in my house and I am thoroughly enjoying seeing my family and friends and being with my father who is very ill.
So, if it takes 2 years to get there, no probs (I can only pray we are safe until then) - it's good knowing you are going, without the frantic rush and stress that goes with it, so I appreciate every breakfast I have at Wimpy and every beautiful winter's day and every time I can pick up the phone to just ask my mom something quickly without having to wait for her to wake up on the other side of the world.
I suppose in a very long winded way I am trying to say don't beat yourself up if you're not happy - it's not the end of the world to go back and forth - I think as long as you respect your partner, your children and try and make wise decisions, you are allowed to make the 'wrong move' and then try again in another direction.
We feel good about our experience in NZ and I can say a lot of good things about the place too, I don't regret going (except maybe financially:curse:- we've learnt alot about what it involves to emmigrate and how different another continent can really be despite all the similarities people say there are.
Do what makes you happy - you have only one life and you deserve to enjoy it - all the way to the grave - just have respect for yourself, your family and children and consider them in your decisions, but other than that, enjoy it!!
Wow, I've finally gotten that all off my chest - feels good.
Thanks!
This is not a post particularly about OZ, but just to share what we've been through and the fact that we went to NZ and back and now perhaps to OZ..
We left for NZ in 2006 - (OZ was first choice but at that time NZ was our only option) I flew over BY MYSELF with a 6 WEEK old baby and a 3 yr old daughter - I've just had a ceasarean. Truth be told, the stress and adrenaline took me right through everything and onto the plane, but when I actually stepped onto the plane and saw my seat - where I was going to have to sit and endure an endless flight with two very small children all by myself - it took every bit of courage I have ever had to stay on that plane on not run down the steps again. I still remember that feeling like it was yesterday.
My husband was already there and had found a good job in Auckland. I had my daughter baptised in SA very rushed before my husband left for NZ.
At first we stayed with distant family - which was difficult. Then moved into a studio flat - my 3 yr old daughter had to bath in a plastic baby bath in the shower - as the flat had not bath! It was pretty much a kitchen, bedroom and dining room in one... then only once the work permit was sorted did we start looking for a rental.
We found a lovely rental, and moved in - camped - rented a fridge, tv, washing machine, dryer and slept on the floor - not fun waking up in the middle of the night with a newborn and really having no comforts from home!
I was sick all the time - the new bugs in the air really hit me and it was horrible having to get up in the mornings whilst being so tired and sick that I just wanted to die, but I had two children who depended on me. I was climbing the walls and could've easily drowned in depression from staying at home with a very difficult baby and 3 yr old and not having any contact with the outside world.
Made a few friends, also joined the church, but nothing could bring back the comfort of having my mom around to help with the kids..
Just as bad was the fact that I would gain the courage to venture outside with the two girls, and after taking about 25 minutes just to gear up for the weather outside, I was ready to just call it a day and not go out at all.
A real dissapointment for me was when September came round and I did what I always do in South Africa when September comes up - I unpack all the summer clothes, swimming towels and sunscreen, take out all the summer sheets, and generally get ready for a 'typical South African' summer! Much to my utter dissapointment, Spring was even worse than Winter! Then, my husband woke me up one morning to tell me that my beloved dog (that we left with my parents) had died - he just knew he couldn't leave me alone that day and took the day off work.
But we drove around alot and saw some beautiful scenery - it's a beautiful country, I had fun going into the city on a Saturday night with the ferry and going to watch the Symphony Orchestra (yes, I know, I'm strange like that
)I took photos of everything and we really did see beautiful and interesting things..
My husband was not ecstatically happy there, but he would've stayed if I was fine.. eventually decided that i would come back by myself for a holiday to visit the family.. but deep in my heart I knew I was coming back for good.
I couldn't face flying by myself again, so my dear husband paid for a ticket for himself, and took only about 3 days leave or something ridiculous just so he could fly back with me and hop right back on a plane again to come and sort things out on NZ side.
Very unselfish of him and he never blamed me for not being able to 'make it' on that side... he also hated the weather
Was glad to be back in SA, and we worked really hard to get back on our feet - and our life's pretty much back to where it was before we left.
Needless to say, nothing's changed in SA and in fact it might have gotten worse - but very early on we already started talking about going to OZ - however, this time learning from some of our mistakes and hopefully making wiser decisions and being more patient.
It was really 'daft' to go with a 6 week old baby - especially someone like me who cannot be left alone in a house all day with small children without having some form of help
We now will wait until the youngest one is at school going age so that I can afford to work part time - it can be an important way of getting to know people and feeling like you are contributing to something..
Like many others, we went with preconceived ideas about what it was going to be like there (especially about the weather) and I was so dissapointed! If I can afford it, I will go for a LSD trip to OZ, but from what I've seen, some of it looks very similar to NZ so I know what to expect when it comes to housing, general look of suburbs etc.
This time, I'm not in a rush - I'm happy (though not safe) in my house and I am thoroughly enjoying seeing my family and friends and being with my father who is very ill.
So, if it takes 2 years to get there, no probs (I can only pray we are safe until then) - it's good knowing you are going, without the frantic rush and stress that goes with it, so I appreciate every breakfast I have at Wimpy and every beautiful winter's day and every time I can pick up the phone to just ask my mom something quickly without having to wait for her to wake up on the other side of the world.
I suppose in a very long winded way I am trying to say don't beat yourself up if you're not happy - it's not the end of the world to go back and forth - I think as long as you respect your partner, your children and try and make wise decisions, you are allowed to make the 'wrong move' and then try again in another direction.
We feel good about our experience in NZ and I can say a lot of good things about the place too, I don't regret going (except maybe financially:curse:- we've learnt alot about what it involves to emmigrate and how different another continent can really be despite all the similarities people say there are.
Do what makes you happy - you have only one life and you deserve to enjoy it - all the way to the grave - just have respect for yourself, your family and children and consider them in your decisions, but other than that, enjoy it!!
Wow, I've finally gotten that all off my chest - feels good.
Thanks!
We too have ping-ponged. SA-UK-SA-OZ (next month).
We are moving from Cape Town to Brisbane next month. I am extremely excited.
We were woken up last night (early hours of the morning) to what we thought was an intruder shining a torch into our living room. It was NOT a nice feeling and I will go to bed every night between now with that underlying worry on my shoulders.
When I got out of bed this morning my resolve was triple, double, triple/tripled to make the absolutely most out of Australia. We'll embrace it for all we are worth.
Apr 26th 2008, 11:29 am
#3
Just Joined
Thread Starter
Joined: Apr 2008
Location: Johannesburg, South Africa
Posts: 13
Re: S.African doing SA-NZ-SA-?OZ?
Hi Dejags,
Good luck with your move! I wish you guys all the best!
I hope this time we'll too make the most of it.
Regards
Sonja
Good luck with your move! I wish you guys all the best!
I hope this time we'll too make the most of it.
Regards
Sonja
Apr 29th 2008, 4:36 am
#4
Victorian Evangelist
Joined: Sep 2005
Location: Melbourne, by the beach, living the dream.
Posts: 7,704
Re: S.African doing SA-NZ-SA-?OZ?
I know I've said this before BUT for us, living in Oz is 100 times better than living in NZ. For a multitude of reasons, but primarily - the weather, the employment opportunities and the lifestyle.
It makes me laugh when my FIL in NZ suggests we should move from Oz back to NZ for better lifestyle!!! What lifestyle? Sitting in his front room watching a repeat of a crap American sitcom because we have no money to go out and the weather is crap even if we did.....
Trust me, Oz is NOTHING like NZ.
Buzzy
