oldskool

The slut list - seems a little overblown really. I can imagine that having your name on the list is a little more degrading than having a whistle blown at you, being knocked into a locker or having a post-in note stuck on you. Such physical contact seems quite tame. Then again, name on the list...sticks and stones and all that, nothing worth getting upset about.

Shit was much worse in the comprehensive I went to. You did get your head flushed down the toilet and while embarassing it wasn't something youd really be concerned about five minutes later.

There was one day each year where amongst the boys, those leaving school would beat the boys in the year below up - there were fights all over the school that day. I went through it and spent the day in fear. No, I didn't play a role in passing it on a year later because I thought it was a bit silly but I can't really say any harm was done and if anything it made me think about strategies to avoid having a terrible day.

These things will happen and there's something to be said for having to go through it and learning to deal with fears. I'm not saying bullying is healthy, but everything I've said above and the slut list (from what I can see) isn't really that. Hazing isn't necessarily bullying.

The slut list has given me an idea of something to try out at work though. I'll let you know if I get fired.

chartreuse

Exactly. There wasn't much in the way of bullying at any of my schools either. Occasionally a new kid would try it on, but a quick trip to hospital is remarkably educational.

snowbunny

Sorry - having seen that someone had written "Amy flucked John" on the bathroom wall really damaged my *nine-year-old* psyche. This crap starts young and it is very hurtful. Guys cannot imagine the shit girls do to each other. Give me a school full of guys any day over girls - and no, not for the dating opportunities.

CaliforniaBride

When I was at Uni in England, of course, we had Fresher's Week in our first year. All the 2nd and 3rd years used to come back for it though.

It wasn't until my second year that I found out why. 2nd and 3rd year students called it "F**k a Fresher" week.

I shall say no more

Englishtart

I agree, girls can be real bitches! I had a horrible time in school, hated every minute of it. I went to all girls secondary schools.

So glad I don't have girls, I'm not sure I would be able to keep my hands to myself if they were put through the crap I was in school

Leslie

Bullying among adolescent boys is also extremely common and just as damaging.

Bob

At my uni, they'd gate crash Royal Holloway and see who could nail gun a corridor...scarily it only took till the middle of the first semester before anyone over there twigged

Englishtart

Yeah, that's true, my oldest went through a taste of it in middle school. I do think though that 'most' boys cope with it easier than girls do. I don't think it is acceptable though, no matter who it is.

another bloody yank

In my very limited experience, boys are more physical while girls are mental/emotional in th emethods of hazing/bullying.

Englishtart

I think you are right, or at least that is how it used to be, these days the girls are getting physical too, the emotional bullying is hard on girls.

Leslie

That's true in a very general sense. It is also rare that there is "crossover bullying" where a boy bullies a girl or vice versa. Not unheard of but certainly less common.

Sally Redux

When we were 2nd years, one of our group started going out with a first year, so everyone kept singing "Under Fresher" to her (to the tune of "Under Pressure" - still think of her when I hear the song )

CelticRover

I have to agree with you on that one. At various times, hazing has never struck me as particularly funny, and my primal instincts always superceded the acquiescence required for acceptance in the group.

tamms_1965

I don't think the US has a corner on the market. Kids this age can be very mean/nasty no matter what country they're from. It may take different forms, but it exists everywhere. I went to a small US high school and never heard of it happening but DH has told me some stories about his school days in the UK (esp. when he went to grammar school).

Sally Redux

That's true, but these rigid 'factions' seem to be more of a US phenomenon.