ironporer

Just was curious how things were going- hadn't seen any thing since the day after the accident.

whistlestop01

Yes i would love to know too how MrP is getting on?? Anyone know??

Steffi

I've been wondering about that myself. I hope he's on his best way to recovery!

Leslie

I have heard from SecretGarden recently.

Mr Pink is improving slowly but steadily. He's had a rough time of it physically and emotionally. He is starting to do a little more than he could the first few days, but I don't believe he will even have his first dressing change until another week or more. It was a catastrophic injury, something nightmares are made of. He is fortunate to have a loving family that is taking good care of him.
SG has had a terrible time of it as well. Their dreams, that were almost within their grasp, were crushed. The plane ticket that was already bought is now useless. The wedding date will probably have to be changed. There are even doubts about his career, because he used his hands. Not to mention his passion for the guitar.

Other than that, everything is great.

The last news I heard from her was that his humour had returned a little bit and he was flirting with her again. She also sounded a little better, but is obviously a little depressed, which I think is perfectly normal. I would wonder about her if she wasn't feeling down, to be very honest. Their love for each other is unwavering, and they do appreciate everybody's concern. Right now they have withdrawn from the NG a little, and I can't say I blame them. Their priorities are with each other and surviving this terrible set-back.

I hope they don't mind my speaking for them a little, I just don't think they have the heart to do it right now.

Leslie

sibsie

They have had to postpone the wedding until Mr P is ok to fly.

dutchman2001nl

I hope he will recover soon.....

Steffi

Do you know if she'll have a chance to fly over there to support him?

Aside the fact that I obviously want him to recover as quickly as possible, I hope that he will be strong enough to move to the U.S. before the 6 month period runs out. That would be terrible to have to go through all that again.

Leslie

At the present time, it does not look like she will be able to. She has young children and an unhelpful ex-husband.

whistlestop01

Our thoughts are definitely with them right now. Please send them my love if and when you next speak to them.

Love Gisela xx

ironporer

As with the majority if not all here , I offer the same (perhaps hollow?) words- that you are in our prayers, that this setback is only temporary, and perhaps even that God works in mysterious ways.

Please don't forget that you have friends here to help with the pain and angst, supporting you and wishing you a fast recovery and reunion.

God speed

John and Cathy

Leslie

Well, I don't think the words are hollow and I don't think they do either. (I feel like their spokesperson here ). One positive thing that came out of this, was the kindness and compassion that everybody is showing them.

WiAnSiempre

I too am praying for a fast recovery for Mr. P. I was actually going to ask about them today I awas thinking about them last night. This will be another test that has been handed to them, but they will pass with flying colors!

Angela

SecretGarden

Hi all,
Ok, *big breath*..........

I hadn't even seen this thread until tonight (Thursday night) while coming down to check my email that has gone untouched for a couple of days, so I'm sorry in not getting back to you more quickly.

Want to thank Leslie, first of all for giving you all the basic rundown----thanks, Les.....

Everything that she has said is true. The April 3rd wedding date has been cancelled simply because we don't know when he will be able to fly. Part of me understands that that is what has to be done, I get it consciously and intellectually but it hurts like hell to have to do that. The wedding people have been very supportive, and no one is taking our deposits for anything---they are all either offering refunds or just to apply the money to an alternate date to be determined sometime later. I can't begin to thank them enough.

How is he doing? Hard question to answer (and I have to temper my answer realizing that he will probably read my response.....that's the trouble with being part of a couple on a NG!) He's in quite a bit of pain. It gets worse at night and at one point he went back to the hospital on Monday to have the wounds checked out because we were both terrified of infection. He was supposed to have the first dressing change this past Tuesday, but because of the pain they did it during the visit on Monday. No signs of infection, and they said the pain is normal and part of the healing process. I do know that there are times of the day that are better, and the night is usually the worst because of swelling. They changed his painkillers and he is still taking them on schedule. From research regarding bone healing from the net, the first three weeks after a break are the worst so we have awhile to go yet before we expect it to subside.

We've decided that all the binding equipment is going to stay in the storage unit where it is until such time that we are emotionally and physically ready to welcome its presence into my house. My guy is a hand bookbinder by trade (21 years worth) and while we're optimistic that he is going to be able to return full force to the thing he loves to do (and is amazing at), it's not to be right now, and so it will wait.

A solicitor has been engaged to deal with the shipping company. I won't go into detail about that here, but suffice it to say that it is being pursued.

Recovery wise, the next big day will be February 3. This is when he goes back to the surgeon for a repeat Xray to determine if bones are continuing to align properly. My understanding is that he will also consult with a physiotherapist (occupational therapist in American English!) and they might be able to outline some form of treatment plan for him. From research it takes an average of 6-8 weeks for the bones to mend fairly well with injuries like his. We are so very lucky that there was no tendon damage, no muscle damage, and no nerve damage that they could demonstrate after the surgery. February 3 is a huge day but of course we are trying to remain realistic and not get our hopes up for travel clearance on that day.

My medical insurance company has been notified of his arrival, I have the instructions for adding him on as a spouse and I was requested to submit a letter to a panel of insurance people for review. This is considered a pre-existing condition and they will be determining whether to cover any of his expenses that occur from this injury. I suspect they will want to know the outcome of the Feb. 3rd appt. before making any final decision, but they can't commit to a time frame. Medical care is free in Britain, very expensive in America, but after losing coming very close to losing him once, I am not going to let the almighty dollar stand between us. Fingers crossed, I think I wrote a kick-ass letter which combined fact and tugging at the heartstrings. Hopefully even insurance people aren't so cold hearted as to not go in for a true romance.

I'm surprising myself right now because I seem to sound ok. I got off the phone from him about an hour ago, and this was probably the worst day yet for me. I just don't know why God would do this to him. He's such a good and caring man. He was supposed to be arriving tomorrow (Friday) and to be honest, I don't know how I'm going to make it through that day. One minute at a time I suppose.

There isn't a chance in hell that he's not going to use this visa. As soon as they tell him he's cleared for travel, a repeat ticket is purchased and I'll be waiting on the other side of either Exit A or B at Chicago O'Hare.

My ten year old son brought me a little notebook the other night and a pen, and he said, "Mom, I want you to do something for me." wassat? "I want you to write down a couple of things everyday that you are thankful for, and those are the things that will be with you when you sleep, and you will wake up stronger in the morning." I've been doing it every day and I have to say some days I have to dig really deep to find anything. Still in my "pissed off with God" phase I guess. Most of the time it's things like "support from friends" or "his pain seemed less today" or "I saw him on the webcam for the first time since the interview and he looked so good" kinds of things. Sometimes it's as simple as "breathing in and out".

My Beloved started his own list, written that night in all capitals in his left hand. It had two items, the first of which was LIFE, and the second was my name.

He has been practicing his writing which I have to say looks really good and I'm so proud of him as he holds up his pages of signatures and letters and numbers to the camera. This resulted in a challenge one night of all my kids and me writing our names with our left hands and the results were pathetic to say the least. He is able to now do up all five buttons on the Levi's button fly jeans that he wears (pretty good for someone who isn't left handed) and he's finding ways of tying things and dressing and shaving and taking care of himself. He is showing amazing courage and strength and I love him dearly.

I don't know why this has happened, I don't know what it means. Your words have not ever been hollow to my ears (or eyes, I guess I should say) and I thank each and every one of you for what you have said and the friendship and compassion you have shown us when the bastards at USCIS and NSC took our life for a year. We'll get it back, but this is no way to live.

I want to say one more thing here tonight. So many of you have said that he and I are an inspiration, a picture of strength, and we have talked about that alot in the last 10 days since this happened. There are times in this when we have felt like we can't live up to the respect and admiration you have shown us throught this. We are human, and we cry, in fact we *SOB* almost daily for what we were supposed to have tomorrow. We yell, we rock, we suffer, and we are damn angry. It *hurts* and we are not above that. I'm grateful that for the most part I've been able to get myself together enough at times to post something that didn't sound self pitying and horrible. Maybe that's God's grace in all this. I really don't know.

Please, please know that everything you have done is seen, and processed, and appreciated. I will have yet another thing to add to my list tonight when I go to bed. Please think of us tomorrow-----we will need your strength.

With Love and Gratitude,
~SG and Mr. P.

Hebapotamus42

SG,

I'm awed. I think you should print out these messages and keep them in a special folder so you can look back on them in the future when other challenges arise, or simply as a reminder of your mutual love and caring.

Simon&Vik

SG, thanks so much for posting all of that.

And I don't think anyone here thinks you guys don't have times where you're crying and having a horrible time dealing with this trama/injury/delay. You're not letting anyone down in the fact that you're both human.

You are both still at the forefront of my thoughts each time I come to these forums...


PS "physiotherapist" is a term we have here in the States too, though often times we'll call it a "physical therapist" instead