Poppy girl

When I was married my step son was a Brat and lazy as hell his friends would come over he was 14 at the time and do the fridge thing....ummm I don't think so buddy,I don't expect an adult to enter my home and go to the fridge without asking yet alone a child.
Scary thing was he would sit at the table and eat with his fingers as well as his knive and folk but WTF is that all about

When I was a little girl I was brought up to say Thank you Mrs or Mr .... for having me or taking me out for the day.

By boyfriend has kids and they are a pleasure to be around ie please and thank you the 12 yrs boy who is adorable opens doors for me and says ladies 1st

Rete

I'm an American. It is not the norm when I was growing up or my kids were growing up and if my grandkids acted like that I would be sued for child abuse for the tanning their back end would get.

cybersecretary

I just dont get it. I would be horrified if my children acted that way - of course I dont know what they get up to behind my back but we do talk about how they should say please and thank you and ask to do things, to the point that they will ask me if they can have a snack when we are home ourselves. I always use please and thank you to them when I am talking to them so I hope it rubs off when they are out and about. My concern is that the lack of respect they see around them will rub off.

Apart from the above, my next pet hate is when kids say "Whaaaaat" instead of pardon. I ****ing hate that, it makes my blood boil. 8 year old started with that and thank goodness has now stopped!

Roland Hulme

Meeeeow.

Total rubbish - generally I've had far ruder service in England than I've ever got in the states. Don't judge off a single experience.

As for the OP's experience - I think it's just bad parenting. Mind you, my wife drives me crackers going around to her brother's house (randomly, without calling ahead) and helping herself to the stuff from his fridge.

I know he's her brother, but STILL. That's unacceptable behaviour.

I think it depends on their background, though. Wifey's family is typical Italian American (and half Jewish) and they're very close, emotional, loud... In comparison, I'm stait and reserved and I've seen the same thing from WASPy American friends.

I think it's far more likely to be based around that sort of thing that typical 'American' behaviour - because walk around Grand Central and see all the ethnicities/languages and you'll realise there's no such thing as a 'typical' American.

cybersecretary

I dont know if its bad parenting. The family are very nice people, a bit overactive for me - I cant keep up. I wonder if the whole thing with them is that they have 3 children all close in age, perhaps they are so busy competing that they forget the little niceties. Whatever it is, it drives me nuts.

Sally Redux

My daughter (12) had 3 classmates round to work on a project the other day. The girl came first and was quite sensible, but when the 2 boys eventually showed up after being called several times they started taking the kitchen apart helping themselves to food, went upstairs to print something on the computer which involved looking through the closet and watching lesbian porn. I have to say most of her friends are quite polite, but a lot of the affluent parents around here have no manners whatsoever and it rubs off. Something I find very rude is when parents call the kids from the car to come outside to be picked up as they can't be bothered to interact with you.

another bloody yank

Did someone say Brat?

http://www.therundown.tv/videos/wtf-...on-television/

lisag8070

pick a window kid....

lisag8070

Unfortunately I think it is a sign of the times...instant gratification kids..parents want to give their kids everything they never had or to make up for them having to work..which is not a bad thing in moderation, the only problem is some kids are smart and realise they're onto a good thing and will just exploit it for all its worth....

another bloody yank

Whever I think about "giving in" to my kids because I'm tired and don't want to take the time, trouble or the hassle of doing the more difficult but correct thing, I think of kids like that.

bevinva

My ex is half Italian, you are expected to be hungry when you get to his mother's house. I was yelled at once for feeding him before we went over.

lisag8070

never give in and never surrender..

but your right being a good parent is hard work and you are never given any time off...but when your child uses manners and talks politely to others...that is the best reward ever and makes it all worth while..

another bloody yank

I think being consistant is key as well.

Emma M

I didn't judge off just one experience. I was using that one experience as an example. I don't know where you are, and I certainly cannot really judge the whole of America, but here no, no one uses manners if they can get away with it. I personally have not had that level of rudeness in England, and as someone who was proud to give good customer service in England, I'm shocked at the difference.

bevinva

My kids are mouthy at home and drive me nuts. It has always made me proud to be told by others how polite they are in their houses, something must have got through. My husband on the other hand gets mad at me all the time when I chime in with "please" when he forgets to say it.