alexa7

We only just moved to australia this year, it was never really 100% permanent thing, we just wanted to experience a bit of life. It's been great, my sister is here for the next couple of years and it's amazing being able to live close to her (i lived in britain for the last 10 year while she lived in my home country in europe). But. i can't get a good job. I've tried for half a year now, i have A job, quite simple and not somewhere i would want to stay, i hate it every day i'm there but trying to find another job proved super difficult and i found australian people being often very racist and telling me out right on the interview as a reason to not offer me a job - that i'm not an australian (or from english speaking background).
My partner hs a great job, much better than he had back home and we're enjoying living in the sunny country (especially that as i said i live next to my sister). But i just don't feel it's enough at the moment - i think if we would have kids we wouldn't need our old friends and i wouldn't be bothered about my job so much - but even getting new friends is nearly impossible! My other half works with older people and people at my job are never going to be more than just colleagues...
So bearing this in mind i have a great job opportunity back in UK at the moment and i really really want this job but the minute i apply for it i start thinking - am i making a mistake? this country is supposed to be where everyone wants to live, do i trade my sister to have a good job and my old friends back? Do i put strain in my relationships with my partner asking him to leave his job? He says he isn't bothered but i still feel guilty... I really don't know what to do. I want to go for a job back in UK but i also afraid of making a mistake and maybe it's not as bad as i think and things will improve with my job situation here... I just don't know what to do((((

manamama

You have to do what you want...you´re only young once and all that....and you won´t know if you´ve made a mistake till you try it.

Why not try it..take the job in the UK with thought of 3 months, then assess it. Your OH says he´s not bothered so there is your answer..If you want to stay in the new job..he can join you. How about that? Easy for me to give advice but I think that´s what I would do.

PS Get yourself happy and settled before kids arrive...

fulwood

Yes i agree as well but it is easy for me to say not in your shoes. try the job in the UK for a certain amount of time. let your partner stay in Oz and if you love job in UK then partner will move for you and if not you'll have to rethink things and life in Australia. Good luck but I would say try the job in the UK.

brits1

Have to agree with M here....I knew lots of people who went to Aus to join their families already there...a lot enjoyed their life but some it was not so good....they seemed to expect "well my brother/sister etc is happy here"..so should I ..sort of thing....but you are not your sister.....you may think your similar but sometimes in life there comes a time when you realise you are your own person who's needs and wants are different....I went to Aus...left all my family (including Sisters) for 12 years.....and if anything we became closer....so if you do decide to return to the UK for a trial etc...then you can always stay in contact with your sister....if you do decide and stay for good in the U.K...well you know where you can holiday...Australia (and not cost a great deal..)when the sun does shine and also what to see and do if you do go and visit your sister, the other option is to stick it out and hope your life changes as it sometimes does....good luck..your only young and while you have no children enjoy the freedom that can bring you to come and go....good luck and all the best

alexa7

thanks everyone. I think i will go for the job... The money is less than what we earn in australia but i also think australia is more expensive especially in terms of houses...I really like Australia and i think it's a good place to live when you've got a family, kids etc but i feel i'm still relatively young to settle down here yet... Want to experience a bit more of europe...the only problem is i think we'll be too settled and too lazy in several years and won't want the hassle of moving back to Australia...

manamama

Glad you´ve been able to make a decision....it´s a great opportunity I think and your future plans are just future plans...who knows what doors it will open up.

Enjoy it...!!

alexa7

I just find myself opposing my decision sometimes and just wish I would not care about a career and stay here in a lovely climate next to my partner and just work a silly job just to get money… It’ll be so hard living apart as well… arghhhh I really don’t know… Really starting to hate change! Wish I would just live in one perfect country with loads of job opportunities, sun and sea! and all my relatives and friends

Wandsworth.Lad

I live in a perfect country with all my relatives & sun and sea. But that doesn't
bring happiness. I want to return to where I was born - LONDON UK.

Don't keep on doubting your judgement. Go to the UK, take the good job offer,
and don't look back.

The best of Luck

brits1

You have all that now and it is not making you happy...it's a shame life does not always hand us a full happy package...but that's life....one perfect country ....it's not really out there...what you have to do is find out what makes you happy....for some it's the weather and not much else.....others...friends family etc.....and then for some it's work......your young and nothing is set in stone....stop worrying about years to come...think about your immediate future for now and what really makes you happy....good luck

alexa7

thanks everyone! i'll just have to wait and see what London job replies to me an then decide... To be honest though i really miss UK, i think australia is great in older years when you have a family etc but when you are young you just want to be near your friends and go out loads

BostonBrit Expat Since 03

To quote John Lennon. This is actually my favourite quote and probably the only one I use as a reality check once in a while.......

"life is what happens when you are busy making other plans"

Fish n Chips 56

Alexa, you said "it was never really 100% permanent thing".

The problems you having are a sign telling you something, I've been an ex-pat for 34 years and still lack real friends in my adopted country, yet I still have real friends back home in the UK.

Follow your gut feeling, your partner is willing to compromise, accept that offer while its still on the table.

All this talk of OZ being better is exactly that, Talk, Its supposed to be Nice, to some people it is nice, but there is no perfect place for everyone, many people go to Oz and many people return, just read these forums, you are not the only unsettled person, The Sun maybe nice but true friendships are worth far more than any sunshine, People make the real difference.

I think you've been influenced by others painting a pretty picture, I don't think it will be better for older families, as then your children are stuck with your life decisions, think long and hard about that one, it might mess up their lives too.

The Best advice I saw was #2, Manamama, "Get yourself happy and settled before kids arrive" that advice is golden, life gets much more difficult once kids arrive, more difficult than you can imagine especially if you are planning to emigrate.

Think way into the future when your parents are older and possibly sick, will you be happy all those miles away, what about when you are old and grey, will you be happy then, you have to be 100% honest with yourself.

I say go with the sure thing, you can always go to Oz or any other place with the generous UK holidays.

I wish you well.

brits1

Have to ditto you on this...also Aus for Older? just would not think of that at all..lol.....us...we want holidays abroad, 5 days trips around the U.K....good friends....weekends in London, York...etc...that is what we envisage for our old age...lol.....hopefully we have won the Euro lottery last night and can start planning right now....