When it's time to go home.
#1
Lost in BE Cyberspace
Thread Starter
Joined: May 2009
Location: Alicante province
Posts: 5,753
When it's time to go home.
I've come across yet another example of expats leaving the time of leaving to go home until it's too late. The great majority of us eventually do return home even after many years of living in a foreign country.
That's what happened to this gentleman after many years in Spain. He's a widower and was healthy and fit until a fall late last year. He has just been recently released from a Spanish hospital after a hip and knee replacement. His married daughter in England couldn't come over to help because of her own family problems.
The expat had been lifted out of his bed and placed on a chair when a doctor told him his treatment was over and he had to go home. The patient doesn't speak Spanish and didn't know what was happening to him. He was wheeled into the corridor where a kindly nurse called the local expat HELP organisation who sent someone to take him home.
He was taken to his first floor apartment but needed to be carried up the steps to it. The expat couldn't do anything for himself, not even visit the toilet. The volunteers knew that the Spanish social system couldn't help, they are not just geared up for it and the helper coming to wipe a patient's bum will only speak Spanish.
The point of this post is: do not leave it too late before making yourself as safe as possible when living in a foreign country, and learn the language as best you can.
That's what happened to this gentleman after many years in Spain. He's a widower and was healthy and fit until a fall late last year. He has just been recently released from a Spanish hospital after a hip and knee replacement. His married daughter in England couldn't come over to help because of her own family problems.
The expat had been lifted out of his bed and placed on a chair when a doctor told him his treatment was over and he had to go home. The patient doesn't speak Spanish and didn't know what was happening to him. He was wheeled into the corridor where a kindly nurse called the local expat HELP organisation who sent someone to take him home.
He was taken to his first floor apartment but needed to be carried up the steps to it. The expat couldn't do anything for himself, not even visit the toilet. The volunteers knew that the Spanish social system couldn't help, they are not just geared up for it and the helper coming to wipe a patient's bum will only speak Spanish.
The point of this post is: do not leave it too late before making yourself as safe as possible when living in a foreign country, and learn the language as best you can.
#2
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Joined: Mar 2011
Posts: 1,518
Re: When it's time to go home.
A very sad story. One can only imagine his loneliness and frustration.
#3
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Joined: Aug 2005
Location: Beckenham, London borough Bromley
Posts: 1,617
Re: When it's time to go home.
Hola
The British Consulate may be able to help repatriate in cases such as these
Davexf
The British Consulate may be able to help repatriate in cases such as these
Davexf
#4
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Joined: Jun 2013
Posts: 990
Re: When it's time to go home.
I think there are many stories like this that we don't hear about. It's a lesson in thinking ahead and doing something before we are too frail to pack up and deal with the stressful business of selling up and moving.
If a partner has a stroke, accident, dementia or any other serious condition, it completely alters their life in Spain. Relatives cannot drop everything and fly over to spend what may be many months in caring and sorting problems.
Paying for daily or 24 hr care is very expensive.
Many can no longer cope with maintaining a property, garden and pool, and it can cost a lot for paid help.
Just everyday dealing with matters that may not be straightforward, is stressful, and after years in Spain some have had enough.
The problem for many is selling the property, understandably not wanting to let it go for a pittance, and hoping to have enough to buy something decent in UK.
If a partner has a stroke, accident, dementia or any other serious condition, it completely alters their life in Spain. Relatives cannot drop everything and fly over to spend what may be many months in caring and sorting problems.
Paying for daily or 24 hr care is very expensive.
Many can no longer cope with maintaining a property, garden and pool, and it can cost a lot for paid help.
Just everyday dealing with matters that may not be straightforward, is stressful, and after years in Spain some have had enough.
The problem for many is selling the property, understandably not wanting to let it go for a pittance, and hoping to have enough to buy something decent in UK.
#5
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Joined: Jul 2007
Location: Finally now living in Lo Marabu, Rojales, and it feels like home
Posts: 3,569
Re: When it's time to go home.
I assume care is cheaper here than in the UK, its 7€ a hour in day and 9€ at night.
Id rather die here than have to go back to the UK ill
Id rather die here than have to go back to the UK ill
#6
Lost in BE Cyberspace
Joined: Feb 2013
Posts: 6,148
Re: When it's time to go home.
I've come across yet another example of expats leaving the time of leaving to go home until it's too late. The great majority of us eventually do return home even after many years of living in a foreign country.
That's what happened to this gentleman after many years in Spain. He's a widower and was healthy and fit until a fall late last year. He has just been recently released from a Spanish hospital after a hip and knee replacement. His married daughter in England couldn't come over to help because of her own family problems.
The expat had been lifted out of his bed and placed on a chair when a doctor told him his treatment was over and he had to go home. The patient doesn't speak Spanish and didn't know what was happening to him. He was wheeled into the corridor where a kindly nurse called the local expat HELP organisation who sent someone to take him home.
He was taken to his first floor apartment but needed to be carried up the steps to it. The expat couldn't do anything for himself, not even visit the toilet. The volunteers knew that the Spanish social system couldn't help, they are not just geared up for it and the helper coming to wipe a patient's bum will only speak Spanish.
The point of this post is: do not leave it too late before making yourself as safe as possible when living in a foreign country, and learn the language as best you can.
That's what happened to this gentleman after many years in Spain. He's a widower and was healthy and fit until a fall late last year. He has just been recently released from a Spanish hospital after a hip and knee replacement. His married daughter in England couldn't come over to help because of her own family problems.
The expat had been lifted out of his bed and placed on a chair when a doctor told him his treatment was over and he had to go home. The patient doesn't speak Spanish and didn't know what was happening to him. He was wheeled into the corridor where a kindly nurse called the local expat HELP organisation who sent someone to take him home.
He was taken to his first floor apartment but needed to be carried up the steps to it. The expat couldn't do anything for himself, not even visit the toilet. The volunteers knew that the Spanish social system couldn't help, they are not just geared up for it and the helper coming to wipe a patient's bum will only speak Spanish.
The point of this post is: do not leave it too late before making yourself as safe as possible when living in a foreign country, and learn the language as best you can.
#7
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Joined: Jun 2013
Posts: 990
Re: When it's time to go home.
There are adverts in shop windows for helping in the house, but it's essential to get someone trustworthy.
If you have a serious or long term condition or disability, unless you are very wealthy, and can go to a residential complex, where every need is attended to, you would be far better off in the UK, where benefits and different care options would be accessible to you.
Another point, not enough thought is given to relatives who are going to have to sort your care, finances, property etc out here if you can't.
It must be a nightmare for those who have left it too late!
#9
Lost in BE Cyberspace
Joined: Feb 2013
Posts: 6,148
Re: When it's time to go home.
Where did you get those figures from. A nursing agency here charges 20 euros an hour, even at your figures 24 hour care would be prohibitive. Anyone working in someone's home would also have to be vetted.
There are adverts in shop windows for helping in the house, but it's essential to get someone trustworthy.
If you have a serious or long term condition or disability, unless you are very wealthy, and can go to a residential complex, where every need is attended to, you would be far better off in the UK, where benefits and different care options would be accessible to you.
Another point, not enough thought is given to relatives who are going to have to sort your care, finances, property etc out here if you can't.
It must be a nightmare for those who have left it too late!
There are adverts in shop windows for helping in the house, but it's essential to get someone trustworthy.
If you have a serious or long term condition or disability, unless you are very wealthy, and can go to a residential complex, where every need is attended to, you would be far better off in the UK, where benefits and different care options would be accessible to you.
Another point, not enough thought is given to relatives who are going to have to sort your care, finances, property etc out here if you can't.
It must be a nightmare for those who have left it too late!
#10
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Joined: Jun 2013
Posts: 990
Re: When it's time to go home.
Even if they are fluent, it won't help much if the resources are not available to help with their decreasing mobility or degenerative illness.
#11
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Joined: Aug 2005
Location: Beckenham, London borough Bromley
Posts: 1,617
Re: When it's time to go home.
Hola
Many pensioners "get by" without being able to speak Spanish; no need in supermarkets and English is the official second language of Europe so many Spanish can speak English. You only need a couple of hundred words (nouns) to make yourself understood - understanding what people say to you is an entirely different thing; the accents can be atrocious - real local dialect unintelligible to those who speak the Kings Spanish !!!
Davexf
Many pensioners "get by" without being able to speak Spanish; no need in supermarkets and English is the official second language of Europe so many Spanish can speak English. You only need a couple of hundred words (nouns) to make yourself understood - understanding what people say to you is an entirely different thing; the accents can be atrocious - real local dialect unintelligible to those who speak the Kings Spanish !!!
Davexf
#12
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Joined: Jun 2013
Posts: 990
Re: When it's time to go home.
The UK is far better in this situation, warts and all!
#13
Lost in BE Cyberspace
Joined: Feb 2013
Posts: 6,148
Re: When it's time to go home.
But it was his choice to live there and if it made him happy. The day it happens in the UK he'd be just as miserable. You could also be living in the UK and might find some people with the same level of English, as a Spanish person in Spain.
#14
Re: When it's time to go home.
He would get help - home visit carers - as a matter of course in the UK. It is entirely different in Spain.
#15
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Joined: Jun 2013
Posts: 990
Re: When it's time to go home.
Some people have been found in a dire situation out here. ill, doubly incontinent,immobile with perhaps an equally frail spouse. They may not have anyone in UK and even if they did they cannot give up their jobs to care for them;Will the Spanish health authority take them under their wing? Social care is available, but first someone must know how to access it, and of course speak Spanish. It's more likely they will be left, possibly in Squalor, until a charity hears about them. These charities do marvellous work, but cannot be expected to take on long term care, especially if there are no funds. Will they then be put in a Spanish residential home filled with residents and carers who they don't understand, and who don't understand them?
The alternative, in UK may not be ideal but it's a damn sight better than what they would face here!
Search "Georgia's story" on Murcia Today for a salutary lesson on what may go wrong if you leave it too long!
TOO many people think it can't happen to them.
The alternative, in UK may not be ideal but it's a damn sight better than what they would face here!
Search "Georgia's story" on Murcia Today for a salutary lesson on what may go wrong if you leave it too long!
TOO many people think it can't happen to them.