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Passenger Complaint

Passenger Complaint

Old Nov 4th 2009, 12:15 pm
  #1  
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Default Passenger Complaint

This was posted elsewhere on the forum, but removed due to screen name so I thought it was worth sharing although many of you may have seen already

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Old Nov 4th 2009, 12:37 pm
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Default Re: Passenger Complaint

That was funny until half way through, then got really boring.

If I was Richard I`d give him a free flight and serve him the same meal.
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Old Nov 4th 2009, 12:58 pm
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Default Re: Passenger Complaint

Originally Posted by chulo
That was funny until half way through, then got really boring.

If I was Richard I`d give him a free flight and serve him the same meal.
I believe he's offered him a job!
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Old Nov 4th 2009, 2:06 pm
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Default Re: Passenger Complaint

That wouldn`t suprise me.

Branson thinks so far outside the box he`s virtually on another continent.
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Old Nov 4th 2009, 5:34 pm
  #5  
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Default Re: Passenger Complaint

Very funny, reminds me a little of this letter....

"For the attention of Rt Hon David Miliband MP
Secretary of State
DEFRA
Nobel House
17 Smith Square
London SW1P 3JR

Dear Sir,
My friend who is farming at the moment recently received a cheque for £3000 from the rural payments agency for not rearing pigs. I would now like to join the "not rearing pigs" business.
In your opinion, what is the best kind of farm not to rear pigs on, and which is the best breed of pigs not to rear? I want to be sure I approach this endeavour in keeping with all government policies as dictated by the EU under the common agricultural policy. I would prefer not to rear bacon pigs, but if this is not the type you want not rearing, I would just as gladly not rear porkers. Are there any advantages in not rearing rare breeds such as saddlebacks or gloucester old spots or are there already too many people not rearing these?
As I see it, the hardest part of this programme will be keeping an accurate record of how many pigs I haven't reared. Are there any government or local authority courses on this?
My friend is very satisfied with this busineess. He has been rearing pigs for forty years or so, and the best he ever made on them was £1442 in 1968. That is - until this year, when he received a cheque for not rearing any.
If I get £3000 for not rearing 50 pigs, will it get £6000 for not rearing 100?
I plan to operate on a small scare at first, holding myself down to 4000 pigs not raised, which will mean about £240,000 for the first year. As I become more expert in not rearing pigs, I plan to be more ambitious, perhaps increasing to say 40,000 pigs not reared in the second year.
Incidentlly, I would if I would be eligible to recieve tradable carbon credits for all the pigs not producing harmful and polluting methane gases?
These pigs that I plan not to rear will not eat 2000 tons of cereals. I understand that you also pay farmers for not growing crops. Will I qualify for payments for not growing the cereals to not feed the pigs I don't rear.
I would also be interested in any information you have about "set aside fields". Can this be done on an e-commerce basis with virtual fields (of which I seem to have several thousand hectares)
I shall of course be voting for your party in the next general election.

yours faithfully,
A. N other."
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Old Nov 4th 2009, 8:04 pm
  #6  
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Default Re: Passenger Complaint

Originally Posted by Mitzyboy
This was posted elsewhere on the forum, but removed due to screen name so I thought it was worth sharing although many of you may have seen already

VIRGIN
For some reason I found myself reading it in my head in a Welsh accent very like Rob Brydon


.
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Old Nov 4th 2009, 8:53 pm
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Default Re: Passenger Complaint

Originally Posted by lunacrout
For some reason I found myself reading it in my head in a Welsh accent very like Rob Brydon


.
No it has to be Disgusted of Tunbridge Wells
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Old Nov 5th 2009, 1:34 pm
  #8  
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Default Re: Passenger Complaint

Originally Posted by rugbymatt
Very funny, reminds me a little of this letter....

"For the attention of Rt Hon David Miliband MP
Secretary of State
DEFRA
Nobel House
17 Smith Square
London SW1P 3JR

Dear Sir,
My friend who is farming at the moment recently received a cheque for £3000 from the rural payments agency for not rearing pigs. I would now like to join the "not rearing pigs" business.
In your opinion, what is the best kind of farm not to rear pigs on, and which is the best breed of pigs not to rear? I want to be sure I approach this endeavour in keeping with all government policies as dictated by the EU under the common agricultural policy. I would prefer not to rear bacon pigs, but if this is not the type you want not rearing, I would just as gladly not rear porkers. Are there any advantages in not rearing rare breeds such as saddlebacks or gloucester old spots or are there already too many people not rearing these?
As I see it, the hardest part of this programme will be keeping an accurate record of how many pigs I haven't reared. Are there any government or local authority courses on this?
My friend is very satisfied with this busineess. He has been rearing pigs for forty years or so, and the best he ever made on them was £1442 in 1968. That is - until this year, when he received a cheque for not rearing any.
If I get £3000 for not rearing 50 pigs, will it get £6000 for not rearing 100?
I plan to operate on a small scare at first, holding myself down to 4000 pigs not raised, which will mean about £240,000 for the first year. As I become more expert in not rearing pigs, I plan to be more ambitious, perhaps increasing to say 40,000 pigs not reared in the second year.
Incidentlly, I would if I would be eligible to recieve tradable carbon credits for all the pigs not producing harmful and polluting methane gases?
These pigs that I plan not to rear will not eat 2000 tons of cereals. I understand that you also pay farmers for not growing crops. Will I qualify for payments for not growing the cereals to not feed the pigs I don't rear.
I would also be interested in any information you have about "set aside fields". Can this be done on an e-commerce basis with virtual fields (of which I seem to have several thousand hectares)
I shall of course be voting for your party in the next general election.

yours faithfully,
A. N other."
Grrrreeaatttttttttttt.
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