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The joy of visitors...
They came, they saw, they used up all our loo roll...
They came to us from England, That green and pleasant land. They came to stay for just one week, But it wasn't what we'd planned. We imagined it would be great fun, Having friends with us to stay, We wanted to spend some quality time, They came for a free holiday! And that's how the trouble started, No matter how we'd try, When things at Hotel Twyntub, Just seemed to go awry. They'd moan about the semi-skimmed, They complained about the tea, They even tutted at the rain, But it rains in Spain, you see. The frequent sudden power cuts, Really made them sad, And the distance we were from the beach, Got them really hoping mad. The lack of local pubs and clubs, And no English TV, Their mobile phones just wouldn't work, We're in the mountains don't you see? What do you mean you've got no landline? And the shops here shut at two? And Tesco don't deliver here? What shopping can you do? And the people just won't speak to us... Except in Spanish, oh my lord! We shout at them as best we can, But seem to get ignored! Yet my wife and I kept quiet, We just kept out the way, Cleaning up their sandy mess, Changing bath towels every day. We coped with no hot water, When they'd used it for a bath, For the 2nd or 3rd time that day, We just had to laugh When they ate up all our chocolate, Yet the wrappers missed the bin, Or when they opened all the windows, And let the mossies in! Hang on, they've offered to take us out! By way of "thankyou" saying. So why is it after a great big feast, It's us that ends up paying! Alas, they've got to go back home, Their flight leaves at half past eight, Another day to cope with them, But tonight we celebrate! They say they've had a lovely time, Enjoying each and every day, But they much prefer their home comforts, Back in the UK. Well go back to bloody England! You've really been a pain! Forget the creature comforts, We prefer life here in Spain! We may not have the latest car, Or a council house TV, We're too busy spending quality time, As a happy family. :eek: |
Re: The joy of visitors...
And I'm afraid that can be so true!
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Re: The joy of visitors...
Originally Posted by twyntub
(Post 5337076)
They came, they saw, they used up all our loo roll...
They came to us from England, That green and pleasant land. They came to stay for just one week, But it wasn't what we'd planned. We imagined it would be great fun, Having friends with us to stay, We wanted to spend some quality time, They came for a free holiday! And that's how the trouble started, No matter how we'd try, When things at Hotel Twyntub, Just seemed to go awry. They'd moan about the semi-skimmed, They complained about the tea, They even tutted at the rain, But it rains in Spain, you see. The frequent sudden power cuts, Really made them sad, And the distance we were from the beach, Got them really hoping mad. The lack of local pubs and clubs, And no English TV, Their mobile phones just wouldn't work, We're in the mountains don't you see? What do you mean you've got no landline? And the shops here shut at two? And Tesco don't deliver here? What shopping can you do? And the people just won't speak to us... Except in Spanish, oh my lord! We shout at them as best we can, But seem to get ignored! Yet my wife and I kept quiet, We just kept out the way, Cleaning up their sandy mess, Changing bath towels every day. We coped with no hot water, When they'd used it for a bath, For the 2nd or 3rd time that day, We just had to laugh When they ate up all our chocolate, Yet the wrappers missed the bin, Or when they opened all the windows, And let the mossies in! Hang on, they've offered to take us out! By way of "thankyou" saying. So why is it after a great big feast, It's us that ends up paying! Alas, they've got to go back home, Their flight leaves at half past eight, Another day to cope with them, But tonight we celebrate! They say they've had a lovely time, Enjoying each and every day, But they much prefer their home comforts, Back in the UK. Well go back to bloody England! You've really been a pain! Forget the creature comforts, We prefer life here in Spain! We may not have the latest car, Or a council house TV, We're too busy spending quality time, As a happy family. :eek: FANTASTIC :thumbsup: its sad but true...... a good thing to do when "guests" mention they are coming over is say "oh great let me know when and I will find a plce to rent for you" that soon puts all the p**s takers off !!!!! works a treat for me |
Re: The joy of visitors...
:thumbsup: Brilliant, you could make a living writing poems, keep it up :thumbup:
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Re: The joy of visitors...
excellent - and oh so true!!!! :rofl:
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Re: The joy of visitors...
Absolutely brilliant, and so true :rofl:
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Re: The joy of visitors...
Spot on.
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Re: The joy of visitors...
Originally Posted by twyntub
(Post 5337076)
They came, they saw, they used up all our loo roll...
They came to us from England, That green and pleasant land. They came to stay for just one week, But it wasn't what we'd planned. We imagined it would be great fun, Having friends with us to stay, We wanted to spend some quality time, They came for a free holiday! And that's how the trouble started, No matter how we'd try, When things at Hotel Twyntub, Just seemed to go awry. They'd moan about the semi-skimmed, They complained about the tea, They even tutted at the rain, But it rains in Spain, you see. The frequent sudden power cuts, Really made them sad, And the distance we were from the beach, Got them really hoping mad. The lack of local pubs and clubs, And no English TV, Their mobile phones just wouldn't work, We're in the mountains don't you see? What do you mean you've got no landline? And the shops here shut at two? And Tesco don't deliver here? What shopping can you do? And the people just won't speak to us... Except in Spanish, oh my lord! We shout at them as best we can, But seem to get ignored! Yet my wife and I kept quiet, We just kept out the way, Cleaning up their sandy mess, Changing bath towels every day. We coped with no hot water, When they'd used it for a bath, For the 2nd or 3rd time that day, We just had to laugh When they ate up all our chocolate, Yet the wrappers missed the bin, Or when they opened all the windows, And let the mossies in! Hang on, they've offered to take us out! By way of "thankyou" saying. So why is it after a great big feast, It's us that ends up paying! Alas, they've got to go back home, Their flight leaves at half past eight, Another day to cope with them, But tonight we celebrate! They say they've had a lovely time, Enjoying each and every day, But they much prefer their home comforts, Back in the UK. Well go back to bloody England! You've really been a pain! Forget the creature comforts, We prefer life here in Spain! We may not have the latest car, Or a council house TV, We're too busy spending quality time, As a happy family. :eek: |
Re: The joy of visitors...
Why I book them into the local hotel and meet up with them occasionally.....apart from close family of course.....cause I can legally shoot them if they moan....
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Re: The joy of visitors...
absolutely genius, i wish i could write poems!...
and with visitors arriving on monday for 11 whole nights, we have it all to look forward to. I think i shall print off your poem and leave it in their bedroom, just as a little hint..... or i'll just read it when the stress is getting too much! |
Re: The joy of visitors...
Originally Posted by KnockCollins
(Post 5338217)
absolutely genius, i wish i could write poems!...
and with visitors arriving on monday for 11 whole nights, we have it all to look forward to. I think i shall print off your poem and leave it in their bedroom, just as a little hint..... or i'll just read it when the stress is getting too much! |
Re: The joy of visitors...
Brilliant.. :rofl:
Pam Ayres eat your hear out :p |
Re: The joy of visitors...
Brilliant, it sums up the majority of visitors that come over.
:thumbsup: |
Re: The joy of visitors...
A slight addendum to this little tale. We had the last laugh... just as we were leaving to drop them at the airport, one of our neighbours stopped us to tell us that there is a festival on here this weekend.
Lots of free food and endless free beer all weekend long. :D Their jaws dropped, we just ushered them into the car before they could even think about changing their flights!!! :rofl: Here's to the weekend everybody, it's finally here! :thumbsup: |
Re: The joy of visitors...
Fab! :lol::lol: and enjoy your weekend - it sounds like you deserve it!
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Re: The joy of visitors...
What a brilliant poem! :thumbsup:
We haven't had the "pleasure" of visitors yet, because we tell them the rented house is unsuitable (it's the truth!) Well, the vast majority of us here are far happier with the life you describe, than the one your "friends" wanted...............and we all know who's got the best end of the deal, don't we? ;) Have a lovely weekend and a well earned break. |
Re: The joy of visitors...
Originally Posted by twyntub
(Post 5337076)
They came, they saw, they used up all our loo roll...
They came to us from England, That green and pleasant land. They came to stay for just one week, But it wasn't what we'd planned. We imagined it would be great fun, Having friends with us to stay, We wanted to spend some quality time, They came for a free holiday! And that's how the trouble started, No matter how we'd try, When things at Hotel Twyntub, Just seemed to go awry. They'd moan about the semi-skimmed, They complained about the tea, They even tutted at the rain, But it rains in Spain, you see. The frequent sudden power cuts, Really made them sad, And the distance we were from the beach, Got them really hoping mad. The lack of local pubs and clubs, And no English TV, Their mobile phones just wouldn't work, We're in the mountains don't you see? What do you mean you've got no landline? And the shops here shut at two? And Tesco don't deliver here? What shopping can you do? And the people just won't speak to us... Except in Spanish, oh my lord! We shout at them as best we can, But seem to get ignored! Yet my wife and I kept quiet, We just kept out the way, Cleaning up their sandy mess, Changing bath towels every day. We coped with no hot water, When they'd used it for a bath, For the 2nd or 3rd time that day, We just had to laugh When they ate up all our chocolate, Yet the wrappers missed the bin, Or when they opened all the windows, And let the mossies in! Hang on, they've offered to take us out! By way of "thankyou" saying. So why is it after a great big feast, It's us that ends up paying! Alas, they've got to go back home, Their flight leaves at half past eight, Another day to cope with them, But tonight we celebrate! They say they've had a lovely time, Enjoying each and every day, But they much prefer their home comforts, Back in the UK. Well go back to bloody England! You've really been a pain! Forget the creature comforts, We prefer life here in Spain! We may not have the latest car, Or a council house TV, We're too busy spending quality time, As a happy family. :eek: |
Re: The joy of visitors...
Originally Posted by KnockCollins
(Post 5338217)
absolutely genius, i wish i could write poems!...
and with visitors arriving on monday for 11 whole nights, we have it all to look forward to. I think i shall print off your poem and leave it in their bedroom, just as a little hint..... or i'll just read it when the stress is getting too much! |
Re: The joy of visitors...
oh dear, reading this has confirmed all my fears about having people to stay with us! :rofl:
The hubby has been going round inviting anyone he remotely knows to come and stay with us and I've been quietly thinking - great, but who will be the one having to make beds, wash towels, clean up their mess and potentially have to cook meals (:confused:) and be an entertaining hostess and think up things for them to do...... There are people I would love to see from home, maybe meet up for an evening or have a day out - but a whole week of living with them would be a bit too much, if that doesn't sound too harsh! |
Re: The joy of visitors...
Having our wonderful dog - a Doberman - makes people think twice - its a wonder what that name can do!
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Re: The joy of visitors...
Brilliant poem :lol: I haven't given anyone my address yet, I have told anyone who asked that it is a new build and therefore no address and difficult to find :p
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Re: The joy of visitors...
Well we have had visitors and family come to stay and I can say with honesty that we have had a great time, We have been brought presents, going to the supermarket paid half all that and filled the car with fuel,
I cant wait to have the house totally finished and have a gang over and let them all see why we live here, All our guest would change places with us, my BIL would like a shot only 3 kids to think about first, his ultimate plan is to come here when lads finished school and settled. So not all doom and gloom, we haven't had that problem Honest.:thumbsup: |
Re: The joy of visitors...
We have - now only close family and very close friends, especially as we arent in the Costa del Sol any more, cant afford to be a free holiday destination for everyone! Last person who asked was replied to by saying we would love to see them - shall we look for somewhere for them to rent while they are here? - dont think we are going to see them somehow.
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Re: The joy of visitors...
Originally Posted by gallerie9
(Post 5347195)
Well we have had visitors and family come to stay and I can say with honesty that we have had a great time, We have been brought presents, going to the supermarket paid half all that and filled the car with fuel,
I cant wait to have the house totally finished and have a gang over and let them all see why we live here, All our guest would change places with us, my BIL would like a shot only 3 kids to think about first, his ultimate plan is to come here when lads finished school and settled. So not all doom and gloom, we haven't had that problem Honest.:thumbsup: |
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