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-   -   Help needed for 2 teenagers (https://britishexpats.com/forum/spain-75/help-needed-2-teenagers-420142/)

Miss Naughty Jan 19th 2007 9:13 am

Help needed for 2 teenagers
 
Hi,
As you are aware i have two teenage daughter's.
They have been out tonight as it is there last weekend, They have both come home in a funny mood, the younger teen has accused the elder one of drinking.
We have done the usa test on her (ha ha ha) and she past we do think she might of had a drink in her eye's. Can not smell it as she has had a few chewy gums inside her.
Sent her to bed, the other one is having a pissy fit, saying we let the oldest get away with everything etc etc etc.
Thing is we can not prove anything, If i could the little bugger would be grounded for a long time.
I have not had this before and am unsure how to handle it.
As it is their last weekend i really dont want to be harsh or a battleaxe any advisexxxxxx pleasexxxxx

leighbloke Jan 19th 2007 9:25 am

Re: Help needed for 2 teenagers
 
If she's had a drink is it the end of the world? If she's come in unable to walk, and puking in your planters, fair do's get miffed.
Personally I'd wonder why the other grassed her up?? siblings, glad I'm an only only child!!
They grow up and along the way they'll experiment with a number of things - I did, but now I have a family a nice house earn well into the 40% tax band, so would like to think it did me no harm.
My advice? - take a chill pill, relax it's OK.

Andy Pipken Jan 19th 2007 9:25 am

Re: Help needed for 2 teenagers
 

Originally Posted by Miss Naughty (Post 4302966)
Hi,
As you are aware i have two teenage daughter's.
They have been out tonight as it is there last weekend, They have both come home in a funny mood, the younger teen has accused the elder one of drinking.
We have done the usa test on her (ha ha ha) and she past we do think she might of had a drink in her eye's. Can not smell it as she has had a few chewy gums inside her.
Sent her to bed, the other one is having a pissy fit, saying we let the oldest get away with everything etc etc etc.
Thing is we can not prove anything, If i could the little bugger would be grounded for a long time.
I have not had this before and am unsure how to handle it.
As it is their last weekend i really dont want to be harsh or a battleaxe any advisexxxxxx pleasexxxxx

What you need to do is stand them both up in front of you and say
"LOOK INTO MY EYES,LOOK INTO MY EYES, NOT AROUND MY EYES, RIGHT YOUR UNDER
YOU WILL TELL ME WHAT YOU HAVE BOTH GOT UPTO TONIGHT
after they have told you everything
CLICK YOUR FINGERS AND THEY WILL WAKE

Miss Naughty Jan 19th 2007 9:30 am

Re: Help needed for 2 teenagers
 

Originally Posted by Andy Pipken (Post 4303021)
What you need to do is stand them both up in front of you and say
"LOOK INTO MY EYES,LOOK INTO MY EYES, NOT AROUND MY EYES, RIGHT YOUR UNDER
YOU WILL TELL ME WHAT YOU HAVE BOTH GOT UPTO TONIGHT
after they have told you everything
CLICK YOUR FINGERS AND THEY WILL WAKE

Ha ha if only it was that simple, christ know's.
I thought i had good kids and yes i rememeber drinking at there age but i never got caughtxxx
I want them to be good girls.
Hubby is "well it is there last weekend i am not happy but we can not ground them this time"
I am like ground the shits for even sniffing the shit.
ha ha ha i just want good girls xxx

leighbloke Jan 19th 2007 9:40 am

Re: Help needed for 2 teenagers
 
As you asked for opinions I'll give you mine, you seem to be a bit of a control freak.
I'm glad my mum wasn't like you.

Miss Naughty Jan 19th 2007 9:55 am

Re: Help needed for 2 teenagers
 

Originally Posted by leighbloke (Post 4303086)
As you asked for opinions I'll give you mine, you seem to be a bit of a control freak.
I'm glad my mum wasn't like you.

fair enough,
To be fair i am glad you was not my daughter my girls are 13 and 14 and that is why the uk law states 18 to drink.
To be fair i am not unfair just do not want my kids to become the twats drinking and being silly.
And if you think that is cool i am glad you are not my daughter

esperanza Jan 19th 2007 9:58 am

Re: Help needed for 2 teenagers
 

Originally Posted by Miss Naughty (Post 4303043)
Ha ha if only it was that simple, christ know's.
I thought i had good kids and yes i rememeber drinking at there age but i never got caughtxxx

You think you never got caught! But your eldest probably thinks she hasn't got caught either! I'd say as long as she was not obviously drunk then let it go - just keep an eye on her in the future. Everyone goes through it, best if she is open with you rather than going way OTT out of your sight.

Miss Naughty Jan 19th 2007 10:02 am

Re: Help needed for 2 teenagers
 

Originally Posted by esperanza (Post 4303149)
You think you never got caught! But your eldest probably thinks she hasn't got caught either! I'd say as long as she was not obviously drunk then let it go - just keep an eye on her in the future. Everyone goes through it, best if she is open with you rather than going way OTT out of your sight.

Thank you that is what we thought, and we would let it go.
If she come came back pissed, then i would have something to say.
As some have sai they are glad i am not there mum, i would not want that as my daughterxxxx

leighbloke Jan 19th 2007 10:12 am

Re: Help needed for 2 teenagers
 

Originally Posted by Miss Naughty (Post 4303159)
Thank you that is what we thought, and we would let it go.
If she come came back pissed, then i would have something to say.
As some have sai they are glad i am not there mum, i would not want that as my daughterxxxx

If thats what you thought why did you completely ignore my first post when I suggested exactly that? That way I wouldn't have had to point out more directly that you were overreacting to a minor situation. But in any case I'm glad you have decided not to overdiscipline your Daughter.

Miss Naughty Jan 19th 2007 10:16 am

Re: Help needed for 2 teenagers
 

Originally Posted by leighbloke (Post 4303178)
If thats what you thought why did you completely ignore my first post when I suggested exactly that? That way I wouldn't have had to point out more directly that you were overreacting to a minor situation. But in any case I'm glad you have decided not to overdiscipline your Daughter.

Sorry your first post never came through when i replied it was to the latter my mistake i am so sorryxxxxxxxxxx

dazzle Jan 19th 2007 10:17 am

Re: Help needed for 2 teenagers
 
Try the guilt trip thing.

Tell her how much you trust her and how you know that she is sensible and will always try to do the right thing. Throw in a few 'facts' about how alcohol can cause damage when you haven't stopped growing, and safety issues for good measure to prove you're right to worry!

Then tell he you're glad she's your daughter and if she says she hasn't been drinking, that's good enough for you!

Then (and this is the hard bit) leave it. If she has been drinking, she may never confess but you will have made your point and she will have heard it!

leighbloke Jan 19th 2007 10:19 am

Re: Help needed for 2 teenagers
 

Originally Posted by Miss Naughty (Post 4303189)
Sorry your first post never came through when i replied it was to the latter my mistake i am so sorryxxxxxxxxxx

That's not a problem.
Now I'd love you to be my Mum!! Errrrrrrrrr??? not that I'm into the adult baby scene in any way of course.

Miss Naughty Jan 19th 2007 10:20 am

Re: Help needed for 2 teenagers
 

Originally Posted by dazzle (Post 4303190)
Try the guilt trip thing.

Tell her how much you trust her and how you know that she is sensible and will always try to do the right thing. Throw in a few 'facts' about how alcohol can cause damage when you haven't stopped growing, and safety issues for good measure to prove you're right to worry!

Then tell he you're glad she's your daughter and if she says she hasn't been drinking, that's good enough for you!

Then (and this is the hard bit) leave it. If she has been drinking, she may never confess but you will have made your point and she will have heard it!

Done it ha ha haxxx

kaylee Jan 19th 2007 12:34 pm

Re: Help needed for 2 teenagers
 
Hi:)

Hope your move goes really well. Perhaps your daughter is a bit worried about the move. We have some months to go before we make the move and it scares me:D

Best wishes Kay x

mikelincs Jan 19th 2007 8:08 pm

Re: Help needed for 2 teenagers
 

Originally Posted by Miss Naughty (Post 4302966)
Hi,
As you are aware i have two teenage daughter's.
They have been out tonight as it is there last weekend, They have both come home in a funny mood, the younger teen has accused the elder one of drinking.
We have done the usa test on her (ha ha ha) and she past we do think she might of had a drink in her eye's. Can not smell it as she has had a few chewy gums inside her.
Sent her to bed, the other one is having a pissy fit, saying we let the oldest get away with everything etc etc etc.
Thing is we can not prove anything, If i could the little bugger would be grounded for a long time.
I have not had this before and am unsure how to handle it.
As it is their last weekend i really dont want to be harsh or a battleaxe any advisexxxxxx pleasexxxxx

They, like you, are feeling the pressure about leaving, they will also have had all those thoughts about leaving their friends, it's a fear/excitement thing, but it's as was once said, 'there are no strangers in the world, just friends you do not know', they will soon find a new circle of friends, and almost certainly a multinational circle and that can only be a good thing.


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