Thats the one I don't go for.

Did you get rid of your Landrover, Matt?

No it was grout.

No crispy, the alligator (OK cayman in Spain, its true) had eaten all the trout.

Very very sore

Is this where I giggle?

Blimey eaten all the trout greedy bugger, I need to sit down where's me stout

You could, but it really aint funny

I can imagine, nasty little buggers them Cayman, caught a little one in the grass just the other day.

What have you done Mitz?

no still got the Disco, Lara is driving it at the mo, her car died on her before we came up and I am resisting all attempts she is making to buy a Fiat 500!!!

Too much to drink as always

Good lad. Trade Lara in before you do the Landrover....

What has he scraped the skin off...... ????

I was walking around the edge of the pool, stupidly not paying attention, and my right leg slipped off the edge of the pool edge and the right side of it got serrated on the rough concrete cap as I fell sidewys onto the terrace