My 12 year old daughter encountered a fellow expat last night, he and his wife were very drunk. He started to pester my child touching her arm, hair etc, she asked him to please stop, he continued. I asked him to stop and blocked him. They became very aggressive and abusive. We left. My daughter has severe issues relating to OCD and contamination combined with a fragile emotional health. The evening resulted in hysterical behaviour, self harm and a full blown panic attack. She says he touched her inappropriately on her chest. I have so far stopped my husband from 'visiting' the people concerned. Any advice would be welcomed. Can I action a formal denuncia for such action in this country? Is there a law to protect you from such vile actions?

It sounds like a mixture of your daughters issues and drunken adults not being able to understand or control themselves. I'm not sure denuncing is appropriate. Maybe avoid these people in the future, altho if you meet them, you could explain to them that your daughter has issues and cant cope with too much of that sort of attention, but drunks arent easy to reason with, so if you see them sober maybe??? Also explain to your daughter that the world is full of undesirables and try to teach her how to avoid/deal with them for her own benefit in the future??

Jo xxx

I agree with Jo.

I think, in the first instance, just stay away from them - put it down to them being drunk (not that this is an excuse though).


We had to denounce a boy at my daughters school who had been 'touching' her and following her into the toilets.

The headmaster was not at all interested and the police only mildly better.

We asked to speak to the child's' parents (via the headmaster) but got no where as I suspect the head was more concerned about his position etc.

My daughter has now started in ESO so let's hope the problem has gone away.

It must be distressing for your family. I would concur with others, it is best to keep kids away from places where they are likely to meet drunks.

if that is how the guy is when drunk then that is how the guy is when sober.
that his wife was with him indicates she approves of what he is doing.

I will step forward and suggest these people need to be stopped before they get out of hand - this may not be the first time and they are getting braver by doing it in front of a parent.

you need to ensure you keep your husband away from them as this could escalate.

I know so little about the law in Spain but feel sure that if you are able to find a policewoman that speaks English you should discuss it with her.

hope this helps

I'm inclined to agree with Dom but with the additional reason that your daughter, whether of sensitive disposition or not, also needs to learn that not everyone who goes into a bar (or wherever it was) is going to get drunk and be unpleasant. Plus to learn (or perhaps better put needs to see) that drunkenness isn't something to be regarded as automatically 'bad' per se..... there are times it's acceptable if it's more jolly, tipsy, etc., but when behaviour oversteps a mark then clearly getting out of the situation, etc is the right way to go.
I agree unless you can ensure your husband's emotions can be capped, he should not become involved. You have one advantage - you didn't say if they were British expats, but if so you have language and a basic cultural understanding on your side. Far more difficult to approach someone of a different nationality, but particularly if British, approach them is what I think I'd do. I remember someone yonks ago telling me "If I'm not going to stand up for my children, whoever is?"

Perhaps it might be good to teach your daughter some "defensive-non agressive actions" such as screaming at the top of her voice. (this will bring the attention of other people and publically embarass the offender as well as making other parents aware this is a person to avoid), putting you or her father between her and the man.

Im with you on this , if he`s a paedophile and his wife turns a blind eye or is one as well who knows what's next ?,talk to the Police, at the same time I`d keep this strictly between yourself and the Police as I cant imagine being accused of anything worse if you are innocent.

Sounds as if your Daughter needs some counselling

Why do you think that? She might have some issues, but that does not mean she should be excluded from protection against drunken louts.

I am not condoning the drunken louts, you are jumping to conclusions, read back

My daughter has severe issues relating to OCD and contamination combined with a fragile emotional health. The evening resulted in hysterical behaviour, self harm and a full blown panic attack

I did read back..well before I posted and came to the conclusion that if the parents knew the conditions,they had already sought professional help and were doing an ongoing job of managing the situation.

Your "one line post" of Sounds as if your Daughter needs some counselling
almost could be taken that the incident was the daughter's fault, not that of the drunken louts.

Sometimes, what is meant as a "well meant comment", can be taken the wrong way.