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What no Christmas jokes yet?

What no Christmas jokes yet?

Old Dec 21st 2007, 6:59 am
  #1  
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Smile What no Christmas jokes yet?

What no Christmas jokes or puns yet? Let's lighten up the ME forum. Here's a few to get started. Keep them coming but clean!

1. Claustrophobia - a fear of Santa Claus.

2. Paranoia - Santa Claus is coming to town to get me.

3. What did Santa Clause say to his wife on Christmas Eve?
Looks like rain, dear.

4. Why is Christmas just like a day at the office ?
You do all the work and the fat guy with the suit gets all the credit.

5.
Q: American tourist - Can you give me some information about Christmas hippo racing in Dubai ?

A: Africa is the big continent to the west and south-west of the Arabian peninsula. Dubai is in the Arabian peninsula, which is dry and does not have.... oh forget it. Sure, the hippo racing is every Thursday night in the pool at Barasti bar in the Meridien Mina Seyahi Beach Resort. Come naked!

6.
Apple Computer reported today that it has developed computer chips that can store and play music inside women's breasts. The new micro-music player will be a big seller this Christmas.

This is considered to be a significant breakthrough because women are always complaining about men staring at their breasts and not listening to them.


Merry Christmas to all and hope you have a safe one.

MacScot
"Land may yer lum reek" ( I did say "lum")
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Old Dec 21st 2007, 7:56 am
  #2  
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Default Re: What no Christmas jokes yet?

Originally Posted by MacScot View Post
What no Christmas jokes or puns yet? Let's lighten up the ME forum. Here's a few to get started. Keep them coming but clean!

1. Claustrophobia - a fear of Santa Claus.

2. Paranoia - Santa Claus is coming to town to get me.

3. What did Santa Clause say to his wife on Christmas Eve?
Looks like rain, dear.

4. Why is Christmas just like a day at the office ?
You do all the work and the fat guy with the suit gets all the credit.

5.
Q: American tourist - Can you give me some information about Christmas hippo racing in Dubai ?

A: Africa is the big continent to the west and south-west of the Arabian peninsula. Dubai is in the Arabian peninsula, which is dry and does not have.... oh forget it. Sure, the hippo racing is every Thursday night in the pool at Barasti bar in the Meridien Mina Seyahi Beach Resort. Come naked!

6.
Apple Computer reported today that it has developed computer chips that can store and play music inside women's breasts. The new micro-music player will be a big seller this Christmas.

This is considered to be a significant breakthrough because women are always complaining about men staring at their breasts and not listening to them.


Merry Christmas to all and hope you have a safe one.

MacScot
"Land may yer lum reek" ( I did say "lum")


Still no Christmas jokes on here then...
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Old Dec 21st 2007, 8:36 am
  #3  
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Default Re: What no Christmas jokes yet?

Originally Posted by Eva View Post
Still no Christmas jokes on here then...
hahaha...least he tried i guess...

MM, xx
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Old Dec 21st 2007, 9:19 am
  #4  
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Default Re: What no Christmas jokes yet?

Originally Posted by Madam Medusa View Post
hahaha...least he tried i guess...

MM, xx
When my daughter was about six, she came home from school one day and said:

"Why doesn't Father Christmas have any children? Because he only comes once a year, and when he does he comes down a chimney........"

Little angels.........
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Old Dec 21st 2007, 9:25 am
  #5  
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Default Re: What no Christmas jokes yet?

Originally Posted by Madam Medusa View Post
hahaha...least he tried i guess...

MM, xx
You are right MM-Forgive me MacScot for dissing your Festive cheer-
its LANG though-like the sort of membrship Dean has..not Land.

Okay Girls 'n Boys..time for toys! for Eva.Heading off to Dinner Party now with friends etc and I'm getting a loverly secret Santa.
Bling,Krug and lotsa Christmas stuffing....'swonderful time of the year
Be Good.



What do you get if you eat too much tinsil?.... tinsilitis
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Old Dec 21st 2007, 5:43 pm
  #6  
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Default Re: What no Christmas jokes yet?

Originally Posted by Eva View Post
You are right MM-Forgive me MacScot for dissing your Festive cheer-
its LANG though-like the sort of membrship Dean has..not Land.

Okay Girls 'n Boys..time for toys! for Eva.Heading off to Dinner Party now with friends etc and I'm getting a loverly secret Santa.
Bling,Krug and lotsa Christmas stuffing....'swonderful time of the year
Be Good.



What do you get if you eat too much tinsil?.... tinsilitis
eva..you crack me up...

MM, xx
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Old Dec 21st 2007, 5:49 pm
  #7  
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Default Re: What no Christmas jokes yet?

Originally Posted by MacScot View Post
"Land may yer lum reek" ( I did say "lum")
Lang my dear chap - Lang.

Lang mae yer lum reek.

(addendum - until I wrote that I never knew how close Scots was to Philipino.... I am a pogi ungoi after all....)
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Old Dec 21st 2007, 5:52 pm
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Default Re: What no Christmas jokes yet?

Originally Posted by Eva View Post
You are right MM-Forgive me MacScot for dissing your Festive cheer-
its LANG though-like the sort of membrship Dean has..not Land.

Okay Girls 'n Boys..time for toys! for Eva.Heading off to Dinner Party now with friends etc and I'm getting a loverly secret Santa.
Bling,Krug and lotsa Christmas stuffing....'swonderful time of the year
Be Good.



What do you get if you eat too much tinsil?.... tinsilitis
oops - you beat me too it... doh...
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Old Dec 21st 2007, 5:56 pm
  #9  
Eva
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Default Re: What no Christmas jokes yet?

Originally Posted by Autonomy View Post
oops - you beat me too it... doh...
That's ok my little vespa scooter.

Last edited by Eva; Dec 21st 2007 at 5:57 pm. Reason: dyslexic moment with vespa-everything else crystal clear
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Old Dec 21st 2007, 7:26 pm
  #10  
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Santa Claus will become famous soon enough
Default Re: What no Christmas jokes yet?

Originally Posted by MacScot View Post
What no Christmas jokes or puns yet? Let's lighten up the ME forum. Here's a few to get started. Keep them coming but clean!

1. Claustrophobia - a fear of Santa Claus.

2. Paranoia - Santa Claus is coming to town to get me.

3. What did Santa Clause say to his wife on Christmas Eve?
Looks like rain, dear.

4. Why is Christmas just like a day at the office ?
You do all the work and the fat guy with the suit gets all the credit.

5.
Q: American tourist - Can you give me some information about Christmas hippo racing in Dubai ?

A: Africa is the big continent to the west and south-west of the Arabian peninsula. Dubai is in the Arabian peninsula, which is dry and does not have.... oh forget it. Sure, the hippo racing is every Thursday night in the pool at Barasti bar in the Meridien Mina Seyahi Beach Resort. Come naked!

6.
Apple Computer reported today that it has developed computer chips that can store and play music inside women's breasts. The new micro-music player will be a big seller this Christmas.

This is considered to be a significant breakthrough because women are always complaining about men staring at their breasts and not listening to them.


Merry Christmas to all and hope you have a safe one.

MacScot
"Land may yer lum reek" ( I did say "lum")

Ho Ho Ho
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