How to dump your other half (asking for a friend)
 

So, my mate and his missus have pretty much ended their relationship, he drinks too much, she lies constantly. So, how does he get shot of her? She's refusing to move out, doesn't have a job (although is looking), he's even offered to pay a month's rent for her to find somewhere else.

The atmosphere at their place is toxic to say the least, not good for anyone.

My opinion is that she should take the cash, set her up for a month or so and just go (he pays the rent and the apartment is in his name), he's even offered her the cash to go home (she's a flip-flop_, but no, it's a stalemate, he's not the sort of guy to chuck someone out on the street but what can he do?

Any ideas I can pass on?

Re: How to dump your other half (asking for a friend)
 

Re: How to dump your other half (asking for a friend)
 

Is he married to her or living in sin ?

Bring home spiders as new pets (or mice) and let them be organic and run free !
Bring home g/f number 2

Re: How to dump your other half (asking for a friend)
 

He's living in sin and he's not giving her the option of a new place, just a sum of cash. She's on a visit visa (paid for by him) 3 months long with 2.5 months remaining.

Re: How to dump your other half (asking for a friend)
 

I'd tell him to grow a pair and kick her out.
Give her one week to find alternate arrangements, then change the locks on the 5th or 6th day.
**** paying a months rent for someone else, if it's not working just accept it for what it is and end it.

Re: How to dump your other half (asking for a friend)
 

Pack her stuff up and deliver her to the airport, give her some money and say bye bye......breath a sigh of relief (even feel guilty for a couple of days if it helps) and don`t be so bloody stupid again!!!

Re: How to dump your other half (asking for a friend)
 

As above - tell him to put a size 12 boot stamp on her butt.

Why does he want to give her a cash option - you only do that after service has been provided.

Maybe he is afraid she is a bunny boiler ??

Re: How to dump your other half (asking for a friend)
 

so she's only been there 2 weeks!? That was a quick deterioration in the relationship.

Re: How to dump your other half (asking for a friend)
 

Obviously the shag fest was over, and she was not exactly hot at the art of conversation, and perhaps a few habits that were cute to begin with now turned him into the ripper!!!

Re: How to dump your other half (asking for a friend)
 

If he's a heavy drinker the shagging was probably as woeful as the conversation.

From the opening post - what's a 'flip-flop'? Apart from beach footwear.
Where does the girl come from? Has she ditched her old life in the hope of starting a new one, so has nothing to go back to?

Re: How to dump your other half (asking for a friend)
 

Flip flop = Filipina

And he's been seeing her for 2 years or so.

Re: How to dump your other half (asking for a friend)
 

These things happen. Why...well who is anyone to judge why I guess. No relationship is perfect.
I feel your mate is a bit of a softie and in these circumstances the softies really get walked all over. So as mentioned above, either grow a pair and have a huge huge fight and basically escort her all the way to the airport or cancel the DEWA and disappear if he hasnt got the balls. But paying cash for a month's staycation is really a bad idea as that opens the door for her to come with hands wide open begging for more at the end of the month so definitely a bad idea.

Re: How to dump your other half (asking for a friend)
 

You are most certainly NOT a Gent.

Re: How to dump your other half (asking for a friend)
 

Then she is going no-where all the time there is food in the fridge. Given the general likelihood of instability, jealously and passive aggression towards him combined with outward aggression to another filipina eating at the meal table, I would just move another one in and watch them fight it out.

Re: How to dump your other half (asking for a friend)
 

and she ain't no lady either....

Re: How to dump your other half (asking for a friend)
 

Book a weeks vacation, take her back to Phil, give her a bit of cash, say goodbye.

enjoy the rest of the week's vacation, without her

problem solved

Re: How to dump your other half (asking for a friend)
 

Some pretty horrific answers in here, lots of tough talking old geezers :huh:

Your red nosed 'friend' has a degree of responsibility here especially if he has basically provided for her or at least the understanding between them was that was to be the case. A proper deadline with a ticket home seems like the honourable thing to do, if she doesn't have her own visa or legitimate reason to be in the UAE.

Sensible advice aside; bringing another girl home and organising a jelly pool wrestling tournament for the dubious honour of living with the alky seems a viable comedy option.

Re: How to dump your other half (asking for a friend)
 

I honestly don't see paying her to leave, buying a ticket or donating funds as an actual answer.

Whilst it may seem more 'honorable' it's just buying your way out of a problem and giving yourself a pat on the back for being a good guy....when we all know throwing money at things is just a very easy way out.

Just asking this person leave and giving them notice is plenty. Quite why someone would hang around at the end of a relationship is beyond me. Perhaps because they want something? Like some cash or a flight or help with rent? Bugger me sideways. What a surprise.
If they're genuinely ****ed and can't do anything then help to buy them a ticket home and ask them to pay you back. It's a fairly short relationship and you're under no obligation to provide for someone for the next X period of time.

Re: How to dump your other half (asking for a friend)
 

:drinkwine: :popcorn:

Some great ideas here, I've sent him a link - he wasn't happy at being called a borderline alcoholic......

Re: How to dump your other half (asking for a friend)
 

According to him it's been two years.
In my opinion these relationships are mostly based on financial terms (if it's not directly spoken about, it's certainly implied), the tap of love turns off when the funds run dry. So the balance of power or equality in the relationship is hugely skewed in favour of the guy, hence why I'm saying the honourable thing. Nobody is going to come out of it feeling good, or giving themselves a pat on the back, but as a relatively wealthy expat he could cough up something rather than throwing her out the door.

Re: How to dump your other half (asking for a friend)
 

Maybe he's not that wealthy? Maybe he's got money troubles or doesn't earn loads to have that kind of spare cash?

Binning her and kicking her out is harsh if she's stuck with nowhere to go, no money and no hope....of course.
But supporting someone when a relationship has ended seems pointless, especially if entering into a relationship based on these terms (directly or implied).
Dunno...I sound horrid perhaps but dragging these things out or slowly funding someone to restart their 'life' is always going to be the start of a slippery slope.

Re: How to dump your other half (asking for a friend)
 

He's pissing his spare cash against the wall maybe :lol:

Anyhow the entire scenario sounds rather grim, I'm imagining a red nosed and faced northern type, from a trades turned 'management' background, mid 50's living in squalor in a 2 bed flat in some expat ghetto and a similarly pot bellied Filipina nail polisher plucked from a shit hole village.

Re: How to dump your other half (asking for a friend)
 

Re: How to dump your other half (asking for a friend)
 

A great post in what's a pretty grim thread. The woman in question is being talked about as though she's a rancid piece of meat, which makes it ok to throw her out with the trash. Deadline to leave and ticket home is fair to both - he gets rid, she goes home.

Re: How to dump your other half (asking for a friend)
 

Re: How to dump your other half (asking for a friend)
 

Maybe, maybe not, I'm sure we'll never know.
I think your description is pretty much spot on though. I'm placing him in either Barsha or Bur Dubai.

JLT. Interesting shout.
Skinny is irrelevant, she'll probably still wear clothes that are 4 sizes too small for her like every Filipino.

Re: How to dump your other half (asking for a friend)
 

Re: How to dump your other half (asking for a friend)
 

I've been pretty rude about him too I think and you shouldn't turn what's said to fit an agenda or preconception though, that's not very fair. For example, I'm not saying throw her out like a piece of trash, I'm saying give her a week and then expect her to be gone (I'd say the same if it was her paying the bills and rent etc). But paying someone to leave? Isn't it basically enticing or bribing someone to bugger off that bit quicker? Unless they are desperate and need it, it seems a bit of a waste of money to pay someone to go.

With a hand on her knee and a fag in mouth.

Re: How to dump your other half (asking for a friend)
 

You should write novels.

Re: How to dump your other half (asking for a friend)
 

Re: How to dump your other half (asking for a friend)
 

The difference between the grizzled old male expats and the (non grizzled) women is rather remarkable!

Re: How to dump your other half (asking for a friend)
 

I would have her keys off her and when she did go out have the locks changed
otherwise unless she is going to leave voluntarily he is stuck. The last thing he needs is a big bust up and the Police called. He may have to put on his big boy pants on and get firm with her

Re: How to dump your other half (asking for a friend)
 

OP asked for opinions, mine's just one of those. Good luck to his mate and his mate's, er, 'flip-flop'.

Re: How to dump your other half (asking for a friend)
 

Re: How to dump your other half (asking for a friend)
 

Great answer, I think that's the honourable thing to do and that's what I said to him.

Re: How to dump your other half (asking for a friend)
 

Give the money to an actual charity instead.

Re: How to dump your other half (asking for a friend)
 

Also, Western Union any cash to the Philippines as an incentive to actually get on the plane. No one but her can get the money in Phil, and the last thing you want is for her to turn up at the door making a scene after you've got rid, having already forked out.

Re: How to dump your other half (asking for a friend)
 

;) I'm on the difficult second album. Though these kind of threads of bad human behaviour do inspire me.

Re: How to dump your other half (asking for a friend)
 

I look forward to it :-). On my bucket list is a film script, might take a course for that.

Re: How to dump your other half (asking for a friend)
 

I do hope that you will let us know what your mate does Iknownothing and the subsequent results of it :popcorn: