I am often asked why a man has the right to say “divorced” aloud three times and he’s done, while a woman has to file a case in court. This is from Sharia law. Sharia means ‘ordained by the Lord’, and if he is the Lord, then that means he is fair and just, otherwise how can he be the Lord?

What we need to do is understand the wisdom behind the decree. A man is head of a household, which means he is the provider, supporter, protector, cherisher, and means he is in the position of responsibility. To speak ill to his wife, disrespect her or threaten her is not acceptable. If he goes far enough to threaten divorce and say the word, then it is counted as one time it has been said. He may make up, but if he says it again during the marriage, they can still get back together. If he says it a third time, he must leave her alone. He can’t touch her or be with her, and the relationship is severed permanently.

What this means, Mr Husband, is do not let your anger get the best of you and never play that card. Your wife is your ‘amana’ (responsibility), and you signed up to honour and cherish her. As for Mrs Wife, if he is not a fit husband, involve a member of your family or appointed person and someone from his family. They can talk to him and see about helping him get back on track.

http://www.7daysindubai.com/Open-Min...ail/story.html

Well ladies what do you think about this piece of wisdom?

Sounds entirely reasonable, in context. As I said recently, a text out of context is a pretext. The context of the notion would have applied in most of the west up to about 60 years ago, so to rip it apart in the context of changes that have happened primarily in the west (ie out of context) in the modern day (ie out of context) is pointless. You may as well criticise advertising campaigns in the west when vacuum cleaners and washing machines first became available.

You must be knee-deep in some contract stuff because you love a bit of context at the moment my friend?

My word for the week Next week its going to be floccinoccinihilipilification.

Don't you mean floccinaucinihilipilification?

Or is that just categorising valueless trivia?

It's a good word. Useful, but only in the right.......gettit?

Probably. I can't stand (g)nocchi. Although I thought the etymology meant its nocchi.

well I actually asked someone wise once about this and it seems there has been a fatwa about this a while back but I dont want to go looking for it. The gist of the answer was : a man can say it as many times in one go to his wife but it will only count as having been said once, as he is obviously in a fit of rage etc to haven gotten to that stage where he wants to divorce her, right?

So for it to be 'said' 3 times, he must say it once, then leave it and wait for a day and then come back to her face and say it again and then one more time the next day

The wisdom behind this was that in anger we do or say things that we regret later so if you sleep on it then maybe you have a clearer head the next day and by the 3rd day you just go '**** it, ill just deal with it!'
It made sense to me somehow and btw, as one who has gone through all this once, the man has to apply in a court of law as well now, he can say it all he wants to, but for legal matters i.e. joint bank accounts, property proceedings, child custody matters etc, he wont get far without that piece of paper. And when you apply for it, they ask both parties to come back 3 times, after a month's interval each time to try and sit them down and sort out differences. Which ofcourse also makes sense as by the 3rd month of living alone and lonely, both of them are usually sobered out etc. Well, thats the theory atleast...

blimey! I had to look that one up! Why and HOW can anyone use that in a sentence??

I don't see how it is reasonable and just in any context. It is a blatant double standard.

The entire Islamic world relies on double standards, didn't you know?

When men actually were heads of the household, supporters, providers and protectors, and societal norms (Hello, Norm) allowed that to be and remain the status quo. And with the cooling-off periods which are explained above, it seems reasonable to me.

But I can't decide if my view is prejudiced by my gender. I don't think so.