Re: What are the benefits of raising familyin NZ
 

Hi
I feel really sad for you when I read posts like this because Auckland is a VERY expensive part of New Zealand to live. and.your experience of living here may be somewhat different if you lived somewhere else ,but I suppose you are there because your husbands work can only be found in Auckland?
Also petrol costs tend to be higher there too because of the amount burned on that jolly motorway!!
We live on one salary and our groceries are alot less but we dont live in Auckland! I have lived there though!
Best wishes
Shazza

Re: What are the benefits of raising familyin NZ
 

Hi Melting Pot,

How is it going? I've just re-read your original post and see that you've been here for just six months. I got extremely homesick about this time. For me the holiday was over and I had to start doing all the normal things and I would have hopped on the next plane back to England given half the chance. Many people have told me that this is a most common feeling to have around this time.

However, I have been thinking on ways that you might reduce your expenses. $300 on food, nappies etc. does sound an awful lot. I spend $200 and that includes beer and wine, food and cleaning things, for two adults and three boys. Where do you do your general shopping? We find Pak n Save to be the best place to do our big shop, topped up by Vegetable Shops during the week.

Real (washable) nappies save a fortune and your kids get out of them a load quicker, because they feel themselves wet! I had twin 1 year olds when we first arrived here and used to save $40 a week by using washables.

Always buy milk at the Veg. Shop NOT the supermarket. Veg. Shop is loads cheaper. We save around $7 a week on this alone. Also never buy Vegetables in the supermarket - go to the Veg. shop loads cheaper.

If you like Steak, you can live like a King. I could never afford it in England and sometimes (when it's on special $9.99kg, we get sick of the stuff)! Also Mussels, a real delicacy, are soooo cheeeaaap..............

I guess I have to agree that we don't find we lead a rich 'monetory' life. We do, however, have access to a rich lifestyle with the beaches, safe, friendly environment and opportunities to be really self reliant. For example, we found the most beautiful couch put out for the Inorganic Rubbish Collection. I had the cushions recovered and it looks a million dollars!

Did you say that you were living on the North Shore? There is a Community Shop in Glenfield that sells end of line (in date) food and the bread is free every day.

We don't have house insurance or life insurance, but I guess that is just a personal decision.

It sounds like we lead a really hard, basic life. So I do have to add that the BOTOX treatments are also much, much cheaper here, so I get those done too.

I do hope things start to sort out for you. Sounds like you had pressure from family to be here too, which makes it all the more harder for you to make the decision as to whether you want to be here or not.

Good Luck,
At least the Summer's coming. At the end of my six months, we were in the middle of a very rainy winter! We have, also, never purchased a house, so missed out on the biggest housing boom that NZ has ever had - never mind I'm sure it will sort itself out!

Take care,
From
Wigfield1000

Re: What are the benefits of raising familyin NZ
 

[QUOTE=wigfield1000]Hi Melting Pot,

How is it going? I've just re-read your original post and see that you've been here for just six months. I got extremely homesick about this time. For me the holiday was over and I had to start doing all the normal things and I would have hopped on the next plane back to England given half the chance. Many people have told me that this is a most common feeling to have around this time.


Well sun has been shinning last few days so always cheers you up...failing that it was the prospect of going to Docs for Prozac...but the cost of going, let alone prescription keeps that thought at bay.

I shop using Pak n Sav, and Food Town, and Veg shops....so a mixture, and find every other day probably going to get something...the baby goes through fruit and veg like a large caterpillar !!

I had considered washable nappies...but the thought of I must admit puts me off.....so I now consider them to be the one luxury item he has...I have 2 boys...so he has nothing new...so the only expense he has is on his bottom...tried all sorts of cheaper brands...and unfortunately not as good as the better brands.. so this and the formula milk, wipes is approx $60 each week, on a good week can get shopping to $275 inc above...but then had family descend on us which broke the bank....so overall still find it difficult to be much less really

I agree there is lots to do out and about without money, pic nics at beaches, parks etc...

but trying to get down our costs each month seems near on impossible...and now Christmas looming, so the next month or 2 will be even worse, just been looking at the prices of kids toys.....cant believe the prices of some of them...Santa's bags will be much lighter at least !!

We are not looking to be rich...raising a family is always a juggling act...but I do want to be able to save to visit family in the UK, I feel its important to make sure the children still see grandparents, uncles, aunts....and yes...I would go back in a heart beat.. my husband and I are back on talking terms, opposed to being at each others throats for the past 6 months, and he does see that his parents have not been totally honest with him, and since we told them that financially having problems...always phoning, wanting to visit....and become very needy !!! they need things doing at there house, diy, advice..etc etc, but he said himself he knows that they are trying to make us want to stay if only for them....unfortunately...this wont be the case...we came because we wanted to...although encouraged...but will go back even if discouraged...so.. there we are but thats families isn't it.

We are looking forward to the summer now, so certainly wont be going anywhere till after that, Christmas approaching with mixed feelings...but with children in the home, the best time of year too.

I read other peoples threads on here, and what great times they are having, and it makes me feel guilty for questioning being here in the first place, yes of course how could you not enjoy the lifestyle...we do....its the basics we want to sort out...money isn't everything, I know...but need to at least be getting close to braking even each month to live here.
Thanks for your advice.
p.s where do you get botox, and cost....I feel like a treat....

Re: What are the benefits of raising familyin NZ
 

Hi Melting Pot,

First things first - Botox is at St. Marks Women's Health, Wairau Road, Glenfield. I think it's $350 or $375. I find it amazing. My husband thinks I'm mad, but it certainly gives me a boost.

The family thing seems to be big for you. I had similar feelings whilst in England, with my husbands parents, always popping in, giving advice and trying to organise me. I must admit that being in NZ, provides me with a lot more independence and the wonderful ability to do things without anyone making comment. We have no one here, just the five of us.

Still not sure if you're on the North Shore, but if so here's a few ideas:

Check out Hoyts Cinemas for the 'Cans Film Festival', coming soon early November. You buy a tins of Watties and exchange then for cinema tickets (loads of kids films to choose from). They also do a Mum's and Tots session at a greatly reduced rate, once a month I believe, with dimmed lighting for easy feeding and nappy changing. Check out www.hoyts.co.nz

There will be loads of free events happening over Christmas. The Santa Parade in Auckland is amazing and the parking in the multistory car parks is free for the period of the parade. There is a Symphony in the Park and Christmas in the Park. www.arc.govt.nz (I think).

North Shore Councils provide free Kid's Days, where play equipment is provided and events organised. My kids love them. Devonport and East Coast Bays do this for sure. They also have loads of Santa Parades on the North Shore - I love them too - probably something to do with the Prozac! Much reduced dose now, but certainly the best thing I ever discovered, particularly with small children and husbands at work all day. Before, I always felt that I should cope on my own. However, it could be the best $60 spent at the Doctors. The Doctors over here seem so much more understanding of mental stress and are very helpful. This is an experience that I found differed hugely from my Doctors visits in England, even though they were free.

I'm trying to think of other ways that we get by. Op. Shops are great around the North Shore, as there is such a high class of pre-loved clothes. I have some fantastic designer labels that I paid just a couple of dollars for. My last find was a perfectly fitting pair of, new, 501's for $4.

Museum is free for kids and $5 for adults. Great Kids Area, where they will be amused for hours. Parking is free for two or three hours outside of the museum.

Art Gallery is also free.

How old are your children?

I'll keep thinking and get back to you if I think of anything else.

Good luck with it all.
Kind regards,
Wigfield1000

Re: What are the benefits of raising familyin NZ
 

[QUOTE=melting pot]Well here is some good new for you..... kids are not as materialistic in NZ so they will not have the peer pressure they would have had in the UK. We spent a fortune on our 2 girls for thier first Xmas in NZ, only to be a little embarresed when thier friends told us what they had got. Xmas is now a lot cheaper for us. I think a lot of it is to do with the fact that Xmas is in the middle of summer and people are thinking about the beach more than Xmas.

Rob

Re: What are the benefits of raising familyin NZ
 

Who wants to rely on an anti depressant though to be able to enjoy a country ... I have been on them myself for a short while but decided they weren't the answer and it wasn't me it was other external things making me feel down.

Those Botox treatments sound expensive to me how much are they in the UK?

Melting pot I think you will be able to get family assistance, you need to ring the inland revenue up to ask, as you may at least be able to get a community card to get cheap prozac with :D even if no extra cash.

Bulk shopping has helped me to budget, not that I thought I would be having to watch every cent in NZ but hey ho I just get on with it but do still have my very low days.

The sun always helps doesn't it :)

Re: What are the benefits of raising familyin NZ
 

Is this happening country wide, it sounds a bargain!

Re: What are the benefits of raising familyin NZ
 

A small donation goes a long way!
On Monday November 7th 2005, Hoyts will again be holding the annual Hoyts Watties Cans Film Festival. Entry is FREE to any of the following films at any participating Hoyts cinema when you donate a can of Wattie's food.

Trading of Cans and Tickets commences on the 31st October 2005. All tickets to festival films are based on a 1 ticket per can of food and first in first served basis. No rainchecks are offered for this event.

All proceeds are donated to the Salvation Army Christmas Foodbank Appeal

Wairau Park - Auckland

Herbie: Fully Loaded

The Pacifier

Bewitched

Hitch

Charlie & the Chocolate Factory

Madagascar

Fantastic Four

Robots


Lower Hutt - Wellington

Are We There Yet?

Robots

Madagascar

Fantastic Four

Charlie & the Chocolate Factory


Manners Mall - Wellington

Sisterhood of the Travelling Pants

Miss Congeniality 2

Sahara

Madagascar

Charlie & the Chocolate Factory


Riccarton - Christchurch

Bewitched

The Pacifier

Herbie: Fully Loaded

The Adventures of Sharkboy & Lavagirl in 3D

Robots

Charlie & the Chocolate Factory


Moorhouse - Christchurch

Be Cool

Are We There Yet?

The Pacifier

The Heffalump Movie

The Adventures of Sharkboy & Lavagirl in 3D

Charlie & the Chocolate Factory

Fantastic Four

Madagascar


Northlands - Christchurch

Sisterhood of the Travelling Pants

The Perfect Catch

Are We There Yet?

Herbie: Fully Loaded

The Adventures of Sharkboy & Lavagirl in 3D

Robots


Regent on Worcester - Christchurch

Finding Neverland

Raise Your Voice

Monster In Law

The Perfect Catch


Octagon - Dunedin

Finding Neverland

Robots

Madagascar

Charlie & the Chocolate Factory

The Adventures of Sharkboy & Lavagirl in 3D

Fantastic Four


Hope this helps Sky

Re: What are the benefits of raising familyin NZ
 

Yes it did :D thank you very much for that info :D , thats fab we live in Christchurch.

Re: What are the benefits of raising familyin NZ
 

Hi Sky,

Making the decision to take an anti-depressant is a very personal one, which of course can only be decided upon by the individual.

I, however, took Prozac to cope with my twin one year olds and three year old in a new country and can only say that it worked wonderfully for me.

Anti-depressants are a bit of a 'taboo' subject (albeit less so in New Zealand than in England).

If someone really needs to take them, it would be shame if they didn't get this help because they felt embaressed or thought others would think less of them.

Good luck to everyone in whatever route they choose to take.

Re: What are the benefits of raising familyin NZ
 

Oh I know, I totally agree .. I hope you didn't read what I said the wrong way. Hell if you need them take them, I took them after the birth of my second son when I felt like I was under water and detached from all emotion and they were the fabist things I have ever come across.
I just meant that if it was the country making you feel miserable thats all and even maybe then they might help :D

Re: What are the benefits of raising familyin NZ
 

I understand both of your perspectives, and in the UK you wouldn't admit to taking them as you would be considered to be a nutter...yes it really is seen as a no go area.

I took Prozac many years ago, and found that they lifted my mood,and made me able to work out what was making my days so cloudy, and sort them out for myself. And happily 8 months later came off them,my choice.

The situation I am in at the moment has come at a point where I did not expect to feel the concerns and disappointment I am feeling. It has been a difficult 2 yrs in short, house sale in UK taking over 1 yr due to one sale after another falling through, a new baby ( much wanted) and just as sale due to go through, My baby just 3 1/2 months old got meningitis, which was the worst, and most helpless situation in my life to date,I hope no one ever spends there time watching the clock, hopeing a child makes it through the night. and it has,and is taking many many months to cope what we have been through during this time...so the added stress of NZ............b***** Hell how much more. I am not trying to justify why to take them or not...like you said its a choice for everyone, forums have helped in advice, and support,and the anonymity means we never really fully know exactly what people are having to deal with.

Apart from that... all that info...thats great...many thanks...will get shopping...watties here I come Thanks x x ,

Re: What are the benefits of raising familyin NZ
 

Hey Melting Pot, Good Luck with the future, you sure do need some luck eh?
If its any consolation, I have always wanted to come to NZ to live, for years, but sadly, it turned out to be the biggest mistake of my entire life.
I have never taken prozac, always felt able to manage without throughout some awful and tragic events through life, but thats me, besides I am the worst tablet taker on the planet anyway! But if other people need to take them, hey its up to them isn't it? Every one of us handles stress differently.
But even I have almost sucuumbed to getting medical help with disasters we have had here, no easy way out of it either. But for now I am coping without and planning where to go from here.
If you end up back in the Uk, know you haven't failed in any way though, you gave it your best shot which is more than a lot of folk do.
Good Luck and hope you can sort things out, it may be you have to choose between your happiness or your in laws, but IMO, you should go with what makes you happy, they'll get over it.

Re: What are the benefits of raising familyin NZ
 

Was just reading throught the history of whats happened to you, are you still in NZ, or have you managed to escape..

I agree with all that you have had to say about NZ, in your past posts, NZ has many things to be critical of.....and why shouldnt you say so,so hope it helped you. As for me....well have this knotted feeling in the pit of my stomach...just need to work out if this too is a huge mistake or not

As for the prozac, got wine open instead...I know thats realy blown the budget...will be toast the rest of the week. how long were you here for,where are you now

Re: What are the benefits of raising familyin NZ
 

Hi, Yes we are still here but plan to move within 2 years to Australia, all being well.
I suppose that whilst on holiday, NZ feels great, you have still got your comfort zone back in UK, ie house, job, bank account, etc..so you always imagine living here would be like one big long holiday, well as you know, it isn't.
You have lost all the things you had back in the UK, you come here, salary is awful and you pay an awful lot more out for certain things. Holidays back to the Uk to see family are just out of the question, so for some, you say your very last goodbyes when you leave for NZ to live.
We wont stay here, thats for certain, but for now, we have to.