EJD08

I'm very new to this! But I'm moving out to New Zealand in 8 weeks and am very nervous! I lived there for a year this year so I know what to expect and while I'm so crazily excited, Im dreading having to say goodbye to family and friends. There were a lot of times over the past year where I was lonely and missed home so much (even though my boyfriend lives there) and Im wondering from people who have done it also, does it really get easier?? I desperately want to live there but I hate the thought of having a relationship with my parents over the internet! HELP!

Kimi-Deacon

Only been here 3 Months now but have found it does get better with time. A lot depends on the way you look at things and Approach things, i know you say that its hard talking to family on the internet, Big Sis and i talk most days, but we both make a drink curl up on our sofas and we still have girly chat and fun just like we always did when i was in the UK

. Also talk to Grandson over the internet and we play games of Pee Boo and he shows me his new toys, and on Saturday my Dad took the lap top outside and showed me the snow fall that they had there (he knows i love the snow) so i know we cant touch and hug but we still laugh and wind each other up just like when i was at home.

Where in NZ are you heading to ? There are loads of us Ex Pats here in Welly and everyone is really friendly, in fact wherever we have been in NZ most people are really friendly so dont worry get yourself out here and start making some new friends

nero

We have been here 18 months and it can be hard at times being so far away. But things have improved so much with technology. I remember when we originally visited here 15 years ago and the best we could ever hope for was a letter, which took forever to get here or get to the UK! Now you have the Internet, Skype, Email, Digital photos which allow us all to link with families and friends so much easier.

When you speak to family and friends there can be times when you wish you could just pop in and see them and give them a hug. Especially if there are problems, but we all find our own copng mechanisms.

I am sure you will find lots of new friends here and you will also have the support and love of your partner. Good luck and I am sure you will settle in quickly.

CarolineSwan

i cant comment on from nz point of view, but i am in the same boat with my sister staying in england and im in scotland, we have seen each other twice this year but only for my leaving party at the week end there and my papas funeral back in sept, apart from that we havnt seen each other in years, BUT we are very close and this is down to the internet, we chat on here every day and you would think she was just round the corner, thats y i know it will be ok in nz as will be able to keep in contact with family just as easy as when i move to NZ , im sure you will be fine, plus you managed a year before so will be cool, plus they can always visit you

EJD08

Oh, thanks so much for the help - I really appreciate it. It really helps to hear of other people in the same situation hey. Speaking of chatting on the internet - can anyone recommend a good web cam to get? I want to use skype when Im away!
THANKS ALL x

CarolineSwan

We just got a new one, i will find out what kind and let you know

shazniko

Hi EDJ08

You said that you lived in new zealand for a year. We are now thinking about trying to live in NZ for a year before we decide to sell up totally in the UK. However, I'm in a bit of two minds as if we totally love it then it will be sooooo expensive to come back to UK to settle everything and tie up loose ends as we have 2 young kids too. Should we just bite the bullet? Are you glad you tried it for a year first?

The only time we have spent in NZ was 3 weeks in Feb this year but loved it!

We have toyed with so many different areas to settle in but Blenheim seems to be a favourite at the minute as they are looking for midwives there and have been told the support system is very good there.


Shazniko

Batty

Hi there. I'm married to a Kiwi and had never visited before arriving here 3 years ago. My family can't get broadband where they are so we're limited to phone calls but I can honestly say our relationship has only changed for the better. If you don't talk to your family for a couple of weeks it doesn't make any difference - you just pick up where you left off - at least that's what it's like in my family. I'm closer to my sister now than I was before I left - we've re-discovered our old friendship that got disrupted while she was having four babies Being away doesn't have to be a bad thing - the contact you have is far more special than if you were just popping in to each other every day. Having a Kiwi partner will make things easier for you too. Give it a go - you'll kick yourself if you don't

Batty

Hiya

You're assuming you'd all have to go back but would you? Could one of you not just go back alone, organise to sell the house, book the shippers and bob's yer uncle etc.etc. I've no idea how long it would take to do that but, being a woman, I'd say not long

If your children are young enough, now would probably be the best time to 'test the water' before you have to think about schools and stuff like that.

lani welly

We moved to Wellington in Nov 07 - we had been on holiday for 3 weeks earlier in the year. Our opinion was once we came, no going back - if you come over but leave a comfort blanket in the UK, any slight mishap and you could well throw it all away and run back there. I would recommend if you really want to come, do it big style - sell your house, car, ship everything (including dog and cat) and get on with life. NZ's fantastic. My frineds who have been back to the UK on holiday hated it - too dirty, busy, crowded.

BEVS

Well thank you for that insight. Now, could you please stop advertising your business.

jimjim

We moved to NZ early last year and loved it, unfortunately because of unforseen family illness we had to come back to UK but as soon as this problem is sorted we will be back to NZ. If you decide to go then sell up and be determined to make it work it's a fabulous Country and the people are great

howden40

Hi

I would be more worried if you were not worried about the move, it shows you are thinking seriously about the implications.

You are right, knowing you are away for a year is totally different to moving away permanently.

As a parent the biggest complement my boys could pay (well after giving me at least 7 grandchildren) is to show their independence. My job as a parent is to ensure my children can live independeltly of me (even though they know I want at least 7 grandchildren and to play a big part in their lives).

I would sacrifice all this to know my kids were happy no matter where they lived. I would hopefully never let them know how much I would really miss them if they were so far away.

NO MATTER HOW FAR AWAY YOU ARE THE LOVE STAYS WITH YOU AND YOUR FAMILY. Just because you don't see someone doesn't mean you don't love them.

Pauline

CarolineSwan

For me i have always wanted to move abroad and was so looking forward to it.. but omg it hit me big time when we arrived that i wasnt going back, and i had a terrible few hours. I just couldnt stop breaking down into tears every 5 minutes and i kept thinking we could cancel anglo etc etc. i think what was wrong is that i talk to my gran sometimes 5 or 6 times a day and i realised i may never see her again. my papa just passed away so i know she going it rough plus when we left she was in hospital after having a hip replacement. once i spoke to her i realised i could still talk to her when i wanted and i have been fine, plus she will be online soon .

What my hubby said to me was treat it like a long holiday and if you really dont like it we can go back to UK but need to give a good amount of time to try it out not just a week lol . but this place just feels more like home every day we are here and im loving it, also getting a home of our own will probably help , im sure you will be fine. just enjoy it.

caz

Fooferfish

Been here nearly 4 years and it was a strsnge settling in process, i recon it takes at least and more over 2 years to really get into Kiwi life, but at the end of the day, we are all Brits, youll never change that, your kids accent will change, if they are young ones, but i have met people who have been here for 40 years and still sound as if they have just stepped of the plane.

I am nervous about our trip back to UK next week, its a roller coaster ride thats for sure, one minute your up and next you could be down, just go with the flow, osmethings will shock you and after a while things will go over your head, we still see strange things after nearly 4 years, we still get amazed by the sheer beauty of the place, the lack of traffic, people, planes ect the open space around you, the fishing, everything in NZ is there for you to explore, thats why we all come here to witness something different in our lives, youll call people back in UK and they will alll be doing the same things they were doing when you left, the thing is you have a change to see and do different things that they will never do, i have said this to many, " the music is playing and whilst we are here, we should dance to it, because before to long the music will stop !!

Feel privilaged that you are one of the chosen few who get the opportunity for change, and to enrich your lives with different memories , there is only one thing that is a wee problem is the distance NZ is from UK and every thing else, unless you have just won the lottery, dont think you'll be jumping across the ditch to OZ and the islands every year, there are heaps of free things to see and do in NZ so go explore and enjoy your new start in life.

Good luck

Nige Dunedin 05