just some fun..

Old Mar 11th 2008, 2:37 pm
  #121  
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Default Re: just some fun..

Only in America!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!






BEST LAWYER STORY OF THE YEAR, DECADE?



A lawyer purchased a box of very rare and expensive cigars, and then

insured them against, among other things, fire!



Within a month, having smoked his entire stock pile of these great
cigars

and without yet having made even his first premium payment on the
policy,

the lawyer filed a claim against the insurance company.



In his claim, the lawyer stated the cigars were lost "in a series of
small

fires."



The insurance company refused to pay, citing the obvious reason, that
the

man had consumed the cigars in the normal fashion.



The lawyer sued and WON!

(Stay with it).



Delivering the ruling, the judge agreed with the insurance company that
the

claim was frivolous. The judge stated nevertheless, that the lawyer
held a

policy from the company, in which it had warranted that the cigars were

insurable and also guaranteed that it would insure them against fire,

without defining what is considered to be unacceptable "fire" and was

obligated to pay the claim.



Rather than endure lengthy and costly appeal process, the insurance
company

accepted the ruling and paid $15,000 to the lawyer for his loss of the

cigars lost in the "fires".



NOW FOR THE BEST PART.......



After the lawyer cashed the cheque, the insurance company had him
arrested

on 24 counts of ARSON!!!



With his own insurance claim and testimony from the previous case being

used against him, the lawyer was convicted of intentionally burning his

insured property and was sentenced to 24 months in jail and a $24,000
fine.



This is a true story and was the First Place winner in a recent Criminal

Lawyers Award Contest.



ONLY IN AMERICA and some people still believe they went to the moon!
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Old Mar 12th 2008, 4:33 am
  #122  
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Default Re: just some fun..

An old man goes into the chemist to buy some viagra.
"Can I have six tablets cut into quarters, please?" says the old man.
"I can cut them," says the chemist, "but a quarter of a tablet won't give you an erection."
"I am 96 years old," he replies, "I don't want an erection, I just want it sticking out far enough so I don't p*ss on my slippers
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