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3rd year in & unhappy - will this change?

3rd year in & unhappy - will this change?

Old May 22nd 2020, 12:48 pm
  #31  
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Default Re: 3rd year in & unhappy - will this change?

Originally Posted by Millhouse View Post
34... don't waste any more of your prime years. Go home, get a new job and get pregnant. In that order.

If he can make the move with you, great. If not, personal happiness comes first. Don't get pregnant if you're not happy, it'll get worse.
Posting in the NZ forum, does this mean you are considering leaving Disneyland?

I recall you have been kicking around a move to this part of the world.
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Old May 22nd 2020, 1:57 pm
  #32  
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Default Re: 3rd year in & unhappy - will this change?

Originally Posted by Millhouse View Post
.... Don't get pregnant if you're not happy, it'll get worse.
Same applies to marriage - getting married will not fix all the other problems you have, and will make some of them worse.
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Old May 22nd 2020, 5:10 pm
  #33  
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Default Re: 3rd year in & unhappy - will this change?

I'm 34 this year, my partner 36. We are probably on the cusp of marriage and children. I'm worried that if I mention all of the above to him, the proposal won't come and our otherwise strong relationship will be at risk. The truth is, I cannot imagine raising children here and in my heart would rather move back to the UK. I feel as though my kids would be missing out on art, culture, news, the world in general by growing up in NZ....not to mention they'd miss out on having a relationship with my large family. I worry that I'd be at massive risk of post-natal depression if we went ahead and started a family here - I already feel so cut off. I worry that we wouldn't be able to afford to live a decent lifestyle and that trips home to the UK would be sacrificed. When my parents start to age, what will happen? I've already missed some huge milestones like my sister's 30th, Dad's 60th... The truth is I would never have even bothered visiting NZ if it wasn't for my boyfriend. I just don't like it.

You should call it quits and return to the UK...... from reading lots of posts on this forum regarding people missing their family as one of the prime reasons for not liking a new place, the posters never get over that feeling and homesickness just gets worse.

You've given it 3 years and apart from your boyfriend there is not much you like about NZ - you don't like your job, the climate, the isolation, your house etc etc.

Don't get married and have children - then you'll just be married, with children and unhappy.

You say your boyfriend cannot return to the UK because you are not married - not sure where you got this idea from but not true. If YOU want to sponsor HIM for an unmarried partner visa for the UK, you could.
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Old May 22nd 2020, 9:57 pm
  #34  
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Default Re: 3rd year in & unhappy - will this change?

Read my post, don't have children here if you are not 100% sure about staying here until they are 18. Please x
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