Bo-Jangles

In contrast to writing down the good stuff, I recently picked up a copy of the International Express (supposedly as a treat) to read over a long weekend.

After two pages I had read enough and threw it away in disgust! It was so full of doom and gloom and helped me no end to put some things into perspective. Certainly gave some food for thought anyway and put me back on a more even keel than I have been for a while.

BEVS

Whilst I agree with your first sentence that 18 months is early days, I am not sure why you have written the rest.

As far as I can read the OP isn't comparing to ' back home' She is simply feeling homesick.

If you have ever suffered any part of this wretched feeling then you will know that the 'homesick' feeling can suddenly hit you like a ton of bricks . Anything can be the trigger. It creeps up on you from nowhere & can feel overwhelming . It has nothing at all to do with 'fitting in' - 'adapting to one's new lifestyle' . You may be happily toddling along and then , bam, it hits.

They are in farming. That has it's own lifestyle & I am sure that both the OP , her partner and their kids are personable, amiable people.

What she is feeling is 'homesick' & it may help for her to know she is not alone in this. It also helps to be able to freely talk to someone about how you feel at that time .

What would be wonderful is if the people around her would see she is feeling a bit lost and to rally around her. Not for her to have to feel extra pressure to 'fit in' and 'adapt' at a time when she is all over the place.

I'd go along with the suggestion of letting your OH know you are feel a bit lost and lonesome right now. It is always better to share . Sharing such feelings doesn't have to be about a move away from the new country of residence. It can just be about getting those feelings out there and having them accepted by others around you.

I'd also say that those local folks that will support you with this now may well become your good pals of the future as you build a support network and become part of that return support along the way.

Early days. Know that the rotten feeling will pass & I hope the hormones settle a bit for you.

Are the ladies around you busy knitting weeny baby booties , jackets and the like?

Coleyheb

Hi there,
I've been here for 3 and 1/2 years. I moved here to be with my Kiwi partner - I couldn't persuade her to move to the Hebrides where I was living!!
Last weekend we were walking on the Port Hills in ChCh. It was misty and a cool wind was blowing - I got a wave of homesickness missing both the Lakeland Fells as well as the windswept Hebrides - and all my walking mates. I don't think these random pangs will ever disappear, but that is OK.
There is so much I love about NZ - The climate is far better, there are much fewer people and the outdoor activities are excellent. I love National Radio and John Campbell. I really like all my partners friends and enjoy their company.
I think the thing is to appreciate the positive stuff.
Things are not all rosy in the UK at the moment and I think even if my partner offered to move back over with me, I actually think I would prefer to stay here.
Hope your homesickness abates, you never know what people you'll meet and friends you'll make round the next corner :>)
We are moving to Golden Bay shortly - so we will have to say goodbye to friends here in ChCh - we hope to make new friends in the Bay over time :>)

thora

Oh I really feel for you. I can only hope you're feeling better now.
I'm from NZ but have lived in the UK for 14 years and I can only say that it takes time. It doesn't matter what home your sick for, it's so hard especially when you're pregnant.
Try to do things which make you feel good which gets your mind off home. I think hanging out with people can help even if they aren't the types you normally would. Can you try to find some other expats?
It's taken me ages, I still get homesick, especially with the birth of both my children. I still feel that nobody understands me here. But they also don't any more in NZ. Now I'm just stuck in a strange abyss. Sorry I suppose that isn't very helpful.
You live in an amazing place and your kids experience is so important, the sacrifice your making for them is really special.
All the best.

Tirytory

So I wrote exactly the same post last August about Canada and in the first trimester too... I felt heart sick I so missed home. If you search my posts (I'm on my phone and rubbish at tech stuff) then you can see what I posted.

I now have a 9 week old and feel profoundly different. Don't get me wrong I think I will always miss home but I can now see the wood for the trees and without those dam hormones flying around... This place is better for us as a family and I can start to see the light for tour future here. I think the baby being born did spark the same feelings so be prepared but we decided to wait them out and they are passing.. It's horrible but just give it time.

HTH..