honeymommy

Here we are.. June 4th...

It's definate.... We have to pack up and move back to the UK. Rip 4 kids away from their school, friends and happy lifestyle. Hubby is unemployed for the first time in his life. We have no idea what the future will be like.....

BUT...

We will make the best of whatever we face, thats the key.....

Positivity... Time to try to see something good coming out of this dreadful situation.... There are a lot worse off people in this world.

Since this started back in January I have gone through hurt, anger, denile, frustration etc... It has made me a stronger person, but unfortunately it has destroyed any faith I had in the immigration system plus some other things I will not mention here...

So.... On Monday I book the flights and pay for the shipping. Time to finish packing everything, and get prepared to sleep on the floor for 2 weeks in sleeping bag in empty house.... Sort out debts and cars, clean house so we get our deposit back etc etc..

I feel empty right now... Done in.... I have watched hubby and can see how painful this is for him too... The kids have all been acting out in their own ways.. Attention seeking, sick from school with tummy ache, creating drama where there is none... A very difficult time... But... We are a family and support each other.. This can only bring us closer......

For anyone else facing a similar situation.... I want to say this....
Family is #1... Please don't let something like this break you up... This has been one of the most stressful situations of my life, second to cancer... At times I found myself snapping at family and visa versa... Thank god I saw it and we managed to stop it and become supportive rather than destructive....
Some things work out and some things don't... Just life and yes, sometimes it sucks...

So.. here's to an unknown future that will be the best that it can..

So much better than no future at all..... (Coming from a cancer survivor)

This forum, has helped me through. With support, humour, advice and just general chit chat.... People have taken the time to PM me with positive things that have helped me through to face another day.... I thank you all.
((((((((((((((((((((((((((((hug)))))))))))))))))) still need a hug icon on here.... LOL

SO BACK TO OLE BLIGHTY........
Brother in law told me they has snow today.... Me not as green as I am cabbage looking!!! Bastad! ROFL... he thinks I am going to turn into an ice cube back there and is taking every opportunity to tease me..... hahaha

A friend just called and has offered me her mink coat to take back. It comes with a hat you know.......
never had a mink before..... LOL Wonder if theres a lot of animal rights people in Berkshire..... :scared:

Manc

keep smiling luv.

Englishmum

Honeymommy:

I'm so very sorry about your sad news. I don't really know what to say except that I wish I could give you and your family a big hug.

This probably won't be of much consolation, but at least you have a thriving First World country - with apparently a buoyant job market - to be heading back to. It would be dreadful if you had to return to some certain countries say, in Asia, Africa or South America.

Your family won't be the first, or the last that this has happened to, but for each family unit it is devastating. We saw many expat friends leaving Singapore suddenly when they were redeployed or made redundant. My husband's former boss in London came out to Singapore with his family to work and was promoted to Managing Director. After a few years he was relocated to New York......and six weeks later (in January this year) was made redundant due to a management re-organisation and had to return to England. He's in his 50s now and thinks his age will be against him when looking for a new job. We may have to return to England ourselves in the near future too; it's one thing planning to go back to the home country but completely different when you're not yet ready to take that step.

I wish you and your family the very best in the coming weeks and months and hope for a speedy job opportunity to come about for your husband. ((((((hugs)))))))

honeymommy

Thanks to you both....
see... smiling......... bit gritted right now though..... LOL

honeymommy

.ARGH!!!!!!!

f**k f**k f**k f**k f**k f**k f**k bol*ocks....f**k

Please someone edit that out if it is classed as offensive....

I don't usually swear but jeeze!!!!!!!!!!!!!

So get this.... Hubby gets home, has just payed in last wage and severence cheque...... (Cheque spelt the UK way ya notice. am changing allready.. )

The bloody bank has put a hold on both checks so one won't clear till next Friday and the other on the 12st june!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

How the bloody hell am I supposed to book flights and pay for the bloody shipping..... MORONS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

All I got when I called was I should call next wednesday and they may be able to expidite it......... ARGH!!!!!!!!!!!!

Thats it !!! I need to unpack my 40lb bag and have a good kick boxing session before I takr it out on the dog.......

PEOPLE!!!!!!

So no flight date till next bloody week yet!!!! Told the shipping woman I would pay her on Tuesday!!! ARGH!!!!!!!!!!

Ok off to breath gently and meditate to return to calm honeymommy state........

housey

So sorry to hear your news....I know what it's like to keep thinking everything will suddenly take a positive turn and all this has been a bad dream.
Englishmum's reply struck a chord with me - it's ok if you're ready to go and it's your own choice, but when your arm is turned, it feels so much worse.
I'm not surprised about the checks/flights etc - there's something about this country that if there's an awkward, illogical way to do things, that's just it and a with a 'rules are rules' mentality, making sense goes by the wayside.....aarrgghh.
You're in my thoughts
Gill

honeymommy

Thanks housey..

Yes Englishmum was so right.

It took me about 5 yrs to actually start feeling this is home forever. So here I am 1 1/2 yrs later having to leave..... It hurts.

I don't compare USA to UK anymore as they are so different, but I have got into the USA way of living and now have to change to the UK way which will be different after 6 1/2 yrs away.... It is scary to be honest....

I just need to have the flights and shipping booked and I know that I will then start to feel positive about it all and look at the good things we are going to......

someone sent me an Email ages ago which said....

Regret looks back, worry looks around and faith looks forward....

So time to find faith and move ahead....

Thank you so much for giving me a little more faith...

housey

Your attitude has been a strength to me - I really appreciate it.
Big hugs....

dotty

HM, I hope you dont mind me hilighting that paragraph, I just hope some of the trolls that hang in the background of this forum waiting to pounce and slag people off read it.

As for you, strong family, you can tell the way you write, you have the kids, you have your husband so you will get through it, just dont let the stress get taken out on each other

You will build a new life, dont worry about work there is plenty of that and good money too, take care and keep us all posted if it gets tough you know where your cyber mates are

CalgaryAMC

There's always "USA lite" - Canada.

LAL

Honeymommy,

I have followed your thread and came online today for 2 things,
1. To find out how you were doing and hope that they had extended your hubby's work visa.
2. Weetabix

Thanks for your advice on the second issue.

I really wish there was something more positive that I could say other than what all the others have said. I feel it for all of you, knowing what it is to grow up in 2 countries, I have only been back in the UK 8 years after several years in Spain (my fathers family are Spanish), it was a wrench to leave my España but it was my decision, I had no-one forcing me out, I felt that my mother and grandmother needed my support after the death of my beloved grandfather.
Whilst I can only imagine how you and your family must be feeling, I built a new life here in the UK and sometimes wistfully look back at what could have been - I would probably be married to my Spanish ex-boyfriend with Spanish kids!!!
I sometimes get upset I cant go back because my hubby is Anglo-American and doesn't speak Spanish it would be very difficult for him to find work. I still have itchy feet see...
But it is close enough for weekends and short holidays and maybe one day....
The very best of wishes go to you and your family, and at least you will be living in the South where the weather is a tad warmer than up here in Newcastle!!!

Regards,

Allison

Pants

Dear HM

You are such an inspiration, what you write and your postive attitude..you are definately up for being on the next "survivor" show in my books if they ever do anymore.!!perhaps we could start a new one..how to survive immigration process...!!LOL

It must be very daunting for all of you but you seem like the sort of woman who can make gold out of pooh !if you catch my drift !!

I bet MR HM and your children are so very proud of you ....I am and I don't even know you but I have followed your posts and laughed out loud many a time..and I was hoping that by the 4th it would somehow all come together for you all.I am so sorry it has not and I know there are not really the words out there to give you the comfort you might need but I KNOW you will do just bloody brilliantly over in the UK.It will just take time.

HM keep us posted and please keep that lovely humour flowing...Us Brits have a great sense of humour, be proud !

Big huge hugs to you Mrs and stay in touch....

Bella

HM,

I have to echo many of the posts here & say yours are always a joy to read & you ARE an inspiration as Pants says. And you are bl***y funny to boot!

Sorry you have had such a sh**e time - I really hope it gets better for you. Surely the only way now is up??

Keep us posted with your news - I will be watching with interest. Specially as it seems you are settling near to where I grew up.

All the best,

B

tiredwithtwins

aw...sorry to hear your news. Hope you get sorted ok.
The uk isnt so bad.....its getting warm and the lovely summer birds/flowers/trees are in full swing......you'll be fine.

sending you cyber hugs and positive thoughts!!!!!

sue

Ben

I wish you all the luck in the world, HM.

I was very sorry to hear that you were having to go back and move after you were all so settled. As a child I had to do that and it was tough, but having a mum like you there who is supportive and understanding will help your children get through all this.

Be kind to yourself and keep in touch, won't you.