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Re: Waste of a chunk of your life
Originally Posted by slidingbyee
(Post 7713003)
I agree unfortunately as much as I love England, it is a very English trait in my experience - the envy factor.
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Re: Waste of a chunk of your life
[QUOTE=Londonuck;7714245]Don't know if its envy but there is a lot of snidey buggers back there.[/QUOTE
:rofl: Have you been to Australia?? :eek: |
Re: Waste of a chunk of your life
[QUOTE=Fleaflyfloflum;7714412]
Originally Posted by Londonuck
(Post 7714245)
Don't know if its envy but there is a lot of snidey buggers back there.[/QUOTE
:rofl: Have you been to Australia?? :eek: |
Re: Waste of a chunk of your life
I know of some people who can't seem to find 'contentment' and have come to the sad conclusion that the reason they (the ones that I know) can't find it is simply because they have forgotten some important life ground rules:
1) Joy comes from the simplest things 2) Don't waste time or energy on things you cannot change 3) Money brings you security, people bring you happiness I look at many of my parent's generation who say they would not trade places with my children's and probably not mine, I pondered this seriously as they are the only ones who have seen the positives and negatives of all 3 generations. Why were they so content when their lives were so much harder, the answer to that one can be found in the points above and maybe the key is 'choice', it's great to have but too much can divert us on to lengthy crusades to experience more/achieve more/earn more but there is almost always sacrifices to be made and we end up with the constant questioning, what's next / was it worth it / which is best..........STOP......go back to 1,2, 3 and uncomplicate your life :thumbup: |
Re: Waste of a chunk of your life
Hmm, I'm another one who feels like she has wasted a huge chunk of her life. Had been living in the US since 2001, I never really wanted to come, my husband was very keen, set up a business here, etc. Now 8 years on, we've had 2 kids here and we have no family here. The comment earlier about swimming pools and grandparents is so true. We will probably move back in the next couple of years but for me it's been a waste of time. My career has stalled here, I'm now in early 40s, and when we go back who knows what job, house etc I will end up with.
I miss England. |
Re: Waste of a chunk of your life
Originally Posted by jad n rich
(Post 7707936)
Anyone else feel like this.
By the time we leave OZ it will have been nearly a decade:eek: One sons now back to UK for a few years:thumbup:, support him fully and he can emigrate to Canada with his own skills anyway. Now were waiting for a visa to Canada :thumbsup: ( which could take up to 2 years ) unless a job offer comes up meanwhile. However I feel like I have chucked a great chunk of my life down the dunny by spending so long here. Its a really weird feeling, as life here wasnt a disaster, far from it:huh: probably saw more of aus than most aussies ever would, moved at the right time, as in when it was cheap so it was no financial disaster. Had some beautiful homes, friends came and went many times, keep in touch with some, business did very well, kids had fun before the boredom set in... Its more the emotional side, the way it did divide the family at times, the way it affected my parents, seen kids twice in all that time, my mother is very bitter. The wasted days here when we boiled in summers so hot you could barely get up let alone outside:lol: laugh now, I can remember huge chunks of mindumbing bordeom all round. Like another 12 hour drive just so we could see another beach like the one we just left:lol: . The weird feeling that most of the people we met here and kept in contact with were from OS, never got close to many aussies, just never clicked really, even the family:eek::lol: know hundreds, but close ones, so few!! Maybe if it had been 2 years ( about when novelty wore off and I really thought cant live here for ever) I could say great experience. But how do those returning after much longer deal with the 'waste', R just jokes about it, says it could have been worse 30 years:rolleyes: |
Re: Waste of a chunk of your life
My decision was forced upon me and I look back at the loss of businesses, the loss of the life I created abroad and bemoan that had I wanted to be in the UK then I would have riden out the crest of the property bubble and banked enough to last a few lifetimes and in those and a few other ways, I feel almost cheated.
I have my child but no life, no network, no escapes, just the baby and me. I doubt I'll get a job, I can't see me setting up a business here, the cold will come around soon enough and I guess it'll be hard, especially this year. Strangely the thought of earning even half of what I did before seems so much money but the reality is that everything costs so much more, taxes are higher, jobs are thin on the ground and I'm really not sure I could get a job. What did I do wrong ? well, probably not working a couple more years but I'd have gone mental. Then when abroad, not chucking money at a failed relationship which could be better used now and yet knowing at the time that I probably had to come back. Thanksful for the assistance though, very grateful. I just hope I'm wrong and I can get back to being productive ASAP. |
Re: Waste of a chunk of your life
I have read this thread with great interest as I am 'guilty' of the dreadful feeling that my life has been and is still being wasted. It's a rotten way to be, a rotten way to exist and I see no way out of it now unless I leave my husband and son here in Australia and go it alone.
I won't bore you with the details, but my OH has promised me a few times that we will go home together and has broken those promises for various reasons. Now those reasons are no longer valid, he's come up with another one, he's afraid of not being able to get work after all these years and, as he is a true workaholic, I can understand his fears. Of course, just because I understand, it doesn't numb my yearning to go home where I belong and, as the years have gone by, I have become more and more within myself and have lost all the drive I once had to keep pushing for it. I am very unhappy, but all he keeps saying is that now isn't the right time. I don't believe it will ever be 'the right time' for him now and I am scared of what the future holds for me. Good luck Jad & Rich. I had no idea you were finally breaking out.;) |
Re: Waste of a chunk of your life
Similar to the first poster. I'm spend a large part of 8 years in Australia.
I feel I've wasted a large part on my life being there and wish I'd never gone. I've been back in England for two weeks. The people have so much more about themseves here. They have something to say and have a sense of humour. Australia becomes a bland place after a while, lacks depth and culture. It's also so very expensive! Of course there are some good points but overall the place does nothing much for me. My advice to anyone, never sell up to go to Aus and when you get there and if you are unhappy, go with your instincts and leave. Don't waste your time if you know deep down it's not for you. |
Re: Waste of a chunk of your life
Originally Posted by Apollo13
(Post 7712813)
If Dingbat made it to the short-list stage I doubt whether age discrimintion was the issue.
The reason why I asked Dingbat to elaborate on the "no recent UK experience" issue is because she specifically mentioned court work. I have encountered similar obstacles when making applications in the UK. For many of the interesting positions in the UK criminal justice system there are now strict residency requirements. For instance, British police forces require applicants to have been resident in the UK for 3 years immediately prior to application. It is the same for the Foreign and Commonwealth Office, UK Border Agency, SOCA, the list goes on....... Indeed, one similar job that I looked at the other day required applicants to have been resident in the UK for 9 of the last 10 years. The main problem with jobs of these kinds is that the employing organisation usually wants to perform some sort of a criminal background check prior to employment and are simply not prepared to perform a background check on somebody who has been living abroad. I could understand this if an applicant had spent the previous three years in a training camp in Afghanistan but not if he/she has held a job requiring a clean criminal record and is returning from a country which is perfectly capable of conducting reliable background checks. The only exceptions I am aware of apply to those employed in the military or "serving her Majesty's Government" in some way. This residency rule also applies to British citizens. Furthermore, it is practically impossible to get the necessary application forms sent to a foreign address. It is a real shame because the UK is missing out on a lot of qualified applicants. Worse, it makes a mockery of these organisations who continue to brag about their supposed equal opportunities and diversity programmes. Equal ops and diversity are not just about getting the right workforce balance in terms of age, colour and gender. It is supposed to be about employing the most diverse workforce possible. Returning ex-pats have often been exposed to all sorts of different situations, habits and lifestyles and, assuming that their attitudes and other personal qualities fit the bill, are probably in a better position to contribute and uphold diversity-related issues than most people who have never stepped outside their own comfort zone. Just to put things in perspective: when I called the Foreign and Commonwealth Office to find out whether there was any way around these rules, the person handling my enquiry said that I "shouldn't have gone abroad in the first place" !!! Enough said. I understand why they want to make it easier on themselves to security check people, but really are they suggesting that an Australian, Lithuanian etc national who has lived in the UK for the last 3 years (as opposed to the whole of their life) meets the residency requirements, but a BC, who has worked for national gvt for years, is fully security vetted, but just happens to have spent the last two years out of the country doesn't - seems a bit harsh to me. Also, if security checks in these positions are so important, why are the jobs open to virtually all nationalities. Why aren't the jobs only open to Brits ? You'd never get a similar position here unless you were Canadian. |
Re: Waste of a chunk of your life
Originally Posted by pontings gone
(Post 7717840)
Similar to the first poster. I'm spend a large part of 8 years in Australia.
I feel I've wasted a large part on my life being there and wish I'd never gone. I've been back in England for two weeks. The people have so much more about themseves here. They have something to say and have a sense of humour. Australia becomes a bland place after a while, lacks depth and culture. It's also so very expensive! Of course there are some good points but overall the place does nothing much for me. My advice to anyone, never sell up to go to Aus and when you get there and if you are unhappy, go with your instincts and leave. Don't waste your time if you know deep down it's not for you. http://img117.exs.cx/img117/6721/o4fsad.gif |
Re: Waste of a chunk of your life
Originally Posted by pontings gone
(Post 7717840)
Similar to the first poster. I'm spend a large part of 8 years in Australia.
I feel I've wasted a large part on my life being there and wish I'd never gone. I've been back in England for two weeks. The people have so much more about themseves here. They have something to say and have a sense of humour. Australia becomes a bland place after a while, lacks depth and culture. It's also so very expensive! Of course there are some good points but overall the place does nothing much for me. My advice to anyone, never sell up to go to Aus and when you get there and if you are unhappy, go with your instincts and leave. Don't waste your time if you know deep down it's not for you. |
Re: Waste of a chunk of your life
Originally Posted by St.Georges Girl
(Post 7718922)
I would agree with this bit totally, I wish to goodness we had done that after 2 years in. If you have children, the older they get, the harder and more complicated things become.13 years and counting every minute of my wasted life, don't end up like me.
http://img117.exs.cx/img117/6721/o4fsad.gif Your dilema struggles on, i feel for you so much. |
Re: Waste of a chunk of your life
Originally Posted by Nu-Shooz
(Post 7719445)
Hi G, i thought N was booking a flight back to UK August time? has he changed his mind again:frown:
Your dilema struggles on, i feel for you so much. Try to get on msn this w/e so we can have a chat eh? As for HIM, he's not said a word about it in ages, since I told him I need to have his available dates, the boy doesn't want to go back yet and I've kind of given up.:unsure: |
Re: Waste of a chunk of your life
Originally Posted by dboy
(Post 7716322)
Do you mind if I ask why Canada (and where)? Aren't you setting yourself up for more of the same? Don't get me wrong I love living in Vancouver, although it's probably as much about being settled and happy in both my personal and professional life than just vancouver.
Its also (after australia) very much in the centre of the planet, UK eight hours, USA couple hours, that to us is a massive advantage. I would also be proud to have my kids as Canadians, something they think would be cool, they have never shown much interst in wanting to be called Australian:eek:, others may disagree but we find many australians brash and rude and full of so much ignorant self importance. My partners work has always been in construction, he was a carpenter working up to site manager and own projects, I know this is a bad time in construction however it wont stay like that forever, construction is always boom/bust. We feel we can do well there. If I wanted to try another lifestyle it would be the Canadian one, quite the opposite from here, the north american lifestlyle fitted me like a glove before and I want to do it again, the kids really want to do it too. Climate is a bonus for us, believe me heat is not all its cracked up to be. Canada will allow us to improve relationship with family in UK. My bros etc feel canada is a reasonable distance to holiday, australia is not. A cool climate with seasons also appeals to me no end:thumbup: Fall, Christmas, seasons, I want that again too. When I was in Calgary last year I cant explain what walking round on a cool morning with crispy leaves did for me, it was like I feel 'right', I can honestly say I have never got off a plane in australia and felt anything but dread:eek: to be back again. |
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